Would you stay engaged to a guy for 9+ years?

[Farida]

That really is, as someone mentioned, a shut up ring.

Man strings woman along for 2 years...she starts talking marriage.

He says, wait till I get myself established. Man works, buys a car, has savings...circa 5 years

Man now tells woman...I will marry you soon, you won't know when, it will be a surprise....2 years.

Woman starts nagging man...he takes her to look at rings...keeps her for 1 more year.

Woman gives semi-ultimatum-ish or withholds the goodies...man buys a ring. 3 years.

Man now says, "let's save for a wedding." 2 years go by...

woman demands courthouse or cheap wedding...man says "we don't need a piece of paper to validate our love, come live with me, I'll take care of you baby...woman moves in. 2 years go by.

Woman has man's baby....

Woman has another baby....

man breaks up with woman

6 months later marries another woman.

 

[Lucie]

That really is, as someone mentioned, a shut up ring.

Man strings woman along for 2 years...she starts talking marriage.

He says, wait till I get myself established. Man works, buys a car, has savings...circa 5 years

Man now tells woman...I will marry you soon, you won't know when, it will be a surprise....2 years.

Woman starts nagging man...he takes her to look at rings...keeps her for 1 more year.

Woman gives semi-ultimatum-ish or withholds the goodies...man buys a ring. 3 years.

Man now says, "let's save for a wedding." 2 years go by...

woman demands courthouse or cheap wedding...man says "we don't need a piece of paper to validate our love, come live with me, I'll take care of you baby...woman moves in. 2 years go by.

Woman has man's baby....

Woman has another baby....

man breaks up with woman

6 months later marries another woman.

Dang, this makes me so sad. The worst part of your chronological timeline is the last daggone line! I have seen this happen over and over and over and over again. The worst part is the dude keeps dangling that carrot in front of herr face, and no matter what this woman friends and family tell her, she just places them on a mental IGNORE.

 

[brownbeauty196]

If it takes that long it simply means the man does not want to marry that particular women. Men know what they want and if it takes 9 years then its not you . That man may care for you and your kids but secretly he waiting for his "ideal" women to come along and he will marry her in a flash. Women should not wait too long or its just a waste of time.

 

[Kerryann]

hell freaking no

 

[Jade Feria]

Dang, this makes me so sad. The worst part of your chronological timeline is the last daggone line! I have seen this happen over and over and over and over again. The worst part is the dude keeps dangling that carrot in front of herr face, and no matter what this woman friends and family tell her, she just places them on a mental IGNORE.

BUT you know what....after reading WMMB and The Rules (LOL I know, every post of mine in the relationship forum will find a way to reference these books, LMAO), I say, WALK OUT ON HIS ARSE!!!!! F all that! Leave him! In alot of these types of situations, it's not just the guy's fault for "dangling a carrot". It's also the woman's fault for not standing up for herself, for being to *nice*, and not setting standards. When he starts saying things that don't correlate with his actions, forget him! Make yourself scarce! See him less, call him less, and keep yourself busy. That will filter things out for you. That will either make him stock up on a lifetime supply of "act right" or leave. And if he leaves, GOOD. You obviously didn't need him around you anyway. Rules girls and Bi+(#es don't love men who don't love us. That's it.

 

[Butterfly08]

Nope, would not do it. If there is no date set within 1 year then he probably was not serious about the proposal. I know people who have wedding dates 3 years out, but it's booked and they are making payments to the catering hall.

DH had a friend who was engaged for about 10 years. They never did get married. In fact, the guy ended up cheating on her in year 10 (and she stabbed him over it).

You always have the craziest stories!

 

[nysister]

In answer to the original question.

Only if I didn't want to get married. If I did, he would have been off my radar many, many years ago.

 

[Bachelorette]

Even if I were stupid enough to wait that long, my parents would have slapped me from my slumber after 2 years

 

[RootPunch]

To answer your question, HELL NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ditto this!

 

[czyfaith77]

To answer your question, HELL NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

When I saw this question, my mind automatically went to Sophia in the Color Purple.

Scene in the street..

White man: "What you say N-gger?"
Sophia: I said hell naw!
In comes the sheriff...bloomer shot Sophia (Oprah) My mind wanders alot to The Color Purple.

 

[AstroQueen77]

Nope, would not do it. If there is no date set within 1 year then he probably was not serious about the proposal. I know people who have wedding dates 3 years out, but it's booked and they are making payments to the catering hall.

DH had a friend who was engaged for about 10 years. They never did get married. In fact, the guy ended up cheating on her in year 10 (and she stabbed him over it).

Like..with a knife?

 

[Jade Feria]

Looking through my old threads and saw this. UPDATE - She broke up with that guy a few years ago and soon after found another man and they got married within a year.

 

[DarkJoy]

Looking through my old threads and saw this. UPDATE - She broke up with that guy a few years ago and soon after found another man and they got married within a year.

damn. good for her. that's how it goes when they really want you.