I've thought about that. its impossible to spend 8k in 2 months when you don't pay rent or any bills. but honestly i don't think so because i am with him nearly everyday, i don't see how he would have the time or ever seen him act like he was on any other drug.
he sold the psp i gave him for xmas
and the dreamcast i had in his house, (not his!!! specifically told him not to). he said "well its about 7yrs old and you dont play it"
the dreamcast selling ticked me off, so i cut his hair. he had braids, hair longer than mine and didnt flip out on me, which made me take him back that time...
He's selling your possessions, using up your money, stealing your money, you're cutting his hair.......
It is only going to get worse.
that's the thing that is bothering me. is it really about money?, i don't care that he doesn't have any or will get some. i just hate how he uses mine.
i love this guy, i really do. its just MY money is going down the toilet, while he sits and does nothing but enjoy it. all i want is for him to pay for his own **** and show a little appreciation. i guess i need to give a lot of background information on him so you guys can get a gist of what I'm dealing with
It's fine to love him. However, you have to also be smart. Why be with someone who you already know drags you down? How does that help you as a woman? How can you respect a man you do not trust? So what he cooks for you or tells you he loves you often.
erplexed Those things mean nothing when you are his personal money tree.
i constantly remind him that i am not happy with the way things currently are and he promises me better. i guess i am weak in believing that. Ive seen the better side of him and just really think it can come back. i do trust that he would pay me back, he has before in full.
everything went downhill when he lost his job (we worked at same place, its where i met him, he got fired the day after asking me to be his gf, yes the manager (jealous b) was out for me too, i got fired 2 months after) . this is when he starts borrowing money and stops catering to me.
every new job he got, he would call out then get fired for calling out... this is 3 jobs later...
its as if he gave up on life and just wants to smoke weed and have me by his side.
i dont want to fund this which is why he started selling things.
we sat down and talked one day, he really broke down and vented everything on his mind, and admitted he is depressed. he is mad that his mother "didnt support him enough" to succeed in life. how he's the only one in his family to complete high school and go to college. how when he was working he gave his family money but now that he's out, no one wants to help.
i do believe that story, ive met mostly all his family members and lets just say he turned out different...
but he has all the resources in the world to be what ever he wants, i keep telling him that he didnt and doesnt need his mom or family to support him. that its not all for nothing and to get over the past and move on.
its like, all he wants is handouts now, doesnt want to do anything for himself. he told me he's been working since he was 14 and is just tired so was taking a break (for a year?) , but that im right and its time to move on, this was 2 months ago. he did get a new job and quit it the next day... sigh.
it was today i found out he took money out my bag, i asked him about it and he said yea and its no big deal i shouldnt over react. ive since blocked his # from my cell and dont know how long i can last...
Crap, crap, crap! He has a better side? Big whoop! We all have good and evil within us. Yes, most people DECIDE which will be the dominant nature. His mother didn't support him? So frickin what!!! My parents didn't do certain things I wished they had. This is everyone's story, why, because no one is perfect. However, you look at the situation, dust your shoulders off and keep it moving.
i turned 19 in November, and have a really good job making some good money (T-mobile). i don't pay any rent or bills so i really don't need a man to provide for me
i just don't like providing for him... he actually treats me really good except for the fact that its draining my bank account. and that i now have to ask for the things he use to do willingly before
i feel like i'm paying to have a bf.
Draining your bank account, and don't forget stealing from you, is not treating you good. Treating you good is making you feel good about yourself and having the ability to be proud of the type of man he is. He may have potential, they all do, but wait until he accomplishes something to consider if you two should be together.
Change your number, leave this loser scrub alone. He may be coming into some money, but how much money will you be losing in the meantime? Who's to say he will even give you as much as you feel is right? He's shown himself to be untrustworthy with your own money, don't think that because it is his he is now going to handle it responsibly. In life it doesn't work that way.
Please listen to all the advice you've heard. He is not the last man on the earth. You will not be letting him down if you leave him. If he really loves you, breaking up could be a stimulus that is much needed.
It doesn't matter if he changes or not. You need to change and dump his lazy excuse making angry at folks dope smoking butt. Mind you this is coming from an ex on again off again weed loving and smoking ole scallywag.
Drop that boy like a hot potato and I ain't talking about for no darn week either. Any man that will accept all that your putting out is less than a man.
Real men won't take a womans money and have some pride about that kinda of mess. I have a brother and cousin that use women so take heed.
He took money outta your bag? Yikes you need to pepper spray his as or hit in the knees with a bat!
EXACTLY!!!!
thanks for the responses ladies, i believe that everyone of you is absolutely correct and that I'm being blinded by "love" and hope.
he's called me about 20 times now and i haven't answered any. its pathetic the voicemails he leaves, it all sounds so scripted with no remorse "you havent calmed down yet?" "its new years, new things" "im sorry answer my calls" can ya'll believe he said i'm making it harder on myself for not answering his calls smh...
damn i hate starting over. lost contact with a lot of my guy friends cuz he would always acuse me of cheating >.< i have no true female friends
nothing to do but focus on school again i guess and just keep making that paper... for ME.
thanks again everyone, happy new years
Think of it as an opportunity to get it right the next time. Learn from this expensive and painful lesson. Decide what you want for you and go get. Staying with him is settling and easy. It doesn't feel good but you already know what the problem is. Sometimes its scarier to learn something new than to get rid of the old problem. I promise you that starting over without him in your pockets is something you will not regret. After a while you will be asking yourself why you did not do it sooner.
