What happened to tha sistahood of hair-growing?

[VinDieselsWifey]

I've been a member here for awhile, but I mainly lurk...i've seen the tone of the board change too...it use to be mainly the Off Topic & Entertainment sections that had the drama, but i've seen alot of drama in the Hair Discussion board as well erplexed...but i still LOVE this board!! and will continue to lurk and post every now and then....

Happy Hair Growing

 

[justNikki]

I just try to avoid commenting on trends that go negative inorder to avoid increasing the popularity of the trend. And when I do jump in, it's the give the OP the benefit of the doubt. I think that's a large part of the problem; communicating online without seeing people's faces and hearing their tone of voice can lead to a lot of miscommunication if you're not wiling to give the "speaker" the benefit of the doubt.

Amen, amen ALL DAY LONG!

 

[Irresistible]

If you don’t like what someone is saying. Don’t respond. Take what you need and keep it moving. I have noticed that yes some do constantly stress their beliefs. And if I don’t want to hear it I can skip over their post. But, some don’t. Instead they will constantly post pictures of head bashing, or say how they are tired of hearing it, etc. This is pointless and just aggravates situations. Some will post an icon eating popcorn.. Or remarks that "she gonna get you”! Again, unnecessary and further aggravates the situation. If you aren’t interested or just don’t want to hear it, then move on, no need to respond with catty, nasty and mostly unnecessary remarks or icons.

I see many many posts that I disagree with, some I think are untruthful but why get into an argument about it. I don’t respond to the post. I seldom respond to posts for that very reason so many ladies here are catty and some just plain nasty.

I have seen a few threads where posters are complaining about a product from one of our members and the poster is told to pm the vendor. I think it is of utmost importance that when it is one of our lhcf members is selling a product that is not good or giving bad service that we share it. I believe this is of utmost importance because they the lhcf vendor member is almost given a free pass because we members are anxious to support our own. So, if the service or product is bad we need to know. Now within that complaint thread other members will come in and share their positive and or negative experiences with that vendor thereby informing the rest of us of their experiences, too. Then we can make an informed judgment the same as we do for our non lhcf vendors. They should not be treated differently than other vendors. We are giving them the same hard earned money that we give to non members. If your product is good, then its good and the reviews will speak for themselves. And if not the post gives you notice that you should step it up a notch.

I have seen threads where people are insisting that tones have been used with them. Typed words can be very easily misinterpreted because you can’t hear the tone in the persons voice. I have received emails where I have said huh, sounds like they have an attitude and have asked someone else to read the email and they interpreted it differently. So, don’t take offense. If you do take offense then take a break step away from the keyboard.

So, I guess my bottom line is that you should be able to voice your opinion without being viciously attacked. And if you opinion was not liked/appreciated it does not invalidate your opinion. No, you don’t have to stay in that same thread and keep repeating it, because I agree it was heard. But, do I think you should be silenced in other threads? NO! So, for that thread please let it go. However, you are free to go into another thread and share your feelings, especially if that thread is about your subject that you feel so strongly about.

I also feel that many are too lazy to do they own research and want to be spoon fed their information. I have heard remarks like I am too lazy to read the whole thread, so tell me blah blah blah. Or someone with a “how to” question that clearly has not looked. Or buying stuff and then asking “what do I do with this now” What????? How dangerous is that?. The search function may not work but your mouse works and that is how I have found most of my information. Clicking through the pages, no search function, no goggling just perusing the pages one at a time and then I hit the archives. In fact I have found the most valuable information in the archives. A lot of new bandwagons are really just old bandwagons. I saw someone taking credit for originating an idea that was in the archives 3 years old and by another poster who no longer posts on the board.

Lastly, (I know I am long winded) I have noticed that the majority of the meanest, catties post comes from the newer members that have been here less than 18 months. One new member asked another new member why she only had one post in 4 months Huh? What kind of question was that? Don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of catty members here that has been here longer than 18 months, too. But, why when we are here for the same reason, to grow healthy long hair. I have learned a lot since I have been here some I have used and others not.

Sorry for the long post and it was not intended to insult anyone and I have no tone or disrespect directed toward any member.

Much Love,
Tottzu

Tottzu I appreciated your thoughts and your post!

 

[Irresistible]

So now that this has happened, what do you need to move forward? I think you've stated how you feel, but to keep restating it, in response to every post, doesn't move things forward. It just perpetuates the victim role (not that you were or weren't victimized) As someone who read all of the posts in question, I see both sides of this and I think everyone has a valid point. So again, I ask, what needs happen, be written, be typed, whatever, to squash the drama and resolve any hurt feelings?

I come in peace!

I posted what I felt was a 'resolution' post a couple pages back, at least I felt it was , that was my intention. Here is a copy of it

I hope that from here that if I do bring this product up again , my opinion of it to another , at another point in time, when I would feel appropriate that it would not be further taken as me dictating , which I never did ,nor had the power to do , nor the desire , and that it wont be taken as a personal thing against any of you, and that I wont get tag teamed for bringing it up again-not to any of you-but just interacting on a thread with others. You guys are free to post right after me of course if you so choose-respectfully-what you feel/think etc. , as with everything there will always be two sides and my side is not thinking frequent keratin use is totally safe and without risk- and this is not personally against or about any of you-and for those that are using it with no downsides you would obviously be free to say so, none of this has to continue on as against each other.

This is just a post not directed to you Justkiya directly! I should be able to speak on a product-not a person-without anyone coming along speaking against me as a person. In my posts I always try to be fair when speaking about this product and say some are having success with it, but if it comes up and I feel a place to say to that person-I dont feel its without risk-because I feel lead to do so at that moment or whatever-could my right to do so please be respected without it turning personal anymore. as I dont take it personal when anyone says anything positive they feel about it-can we just let it be as its always been-people speaking the positives when they feel lead and people speaking the negatives when they feel lead. I am not invading ya'lls space. I am not up in YOUR thread saying anything to anyone, but could ya'll give me some breathing room to say what I feel about it when I feel I would want to and realize its not against any of you personally!? and that I am not even speaking to you directly in those instances and let this be what its always been an open forum?

 

[kweenameena]

say something nice thread? didn't we have one of these not too long ago? you can't say anything about yourself, not even in some roundabout slick way, but all positive things going out to others on the board. how about it?

oh, and if anyone is upsetting you unduly, disengage. does lhcf have a block feature. i've only used the block feature twice in all my internet life, but both times i did it got rid of a lot of stress.

that was a cute thread.....but how do we draw in newbies to threads like that so that those threads don't become clique-ish?

I think that sometimes people are hesitant to speak out because they feel their opinions, ideas and questions won't be accepted.....and yes we can be very clique-ish in this board

How do we make EVERYONE feel loved and encouraged?

eta: I like the idea of putting some people on ignore. I have never used that feature but I might start.

 

[kweenameena]

I posted what I felt was a 'resolution' post a couple pages back, at least I felt it was , that was my intention. Here is a copy of it

I just want to send you an e-hug....I don't even know what drama went down....or which thread it's in (I'm always out of the loop) but I can tell that it hurt you. So I hope that you can somehow get some closure to whatever happened.
:hugs:

 

[Irresistible]

I just want to send you an e-hug....I don't even know what drama went down....or which thread it's in (I'm always out of the loop) but I can tell that it hurt you. So I hope that you can somehow get some closure to whatever happened.
:hugs:

Thank you sweetie! Very much!

 

[Yellowflowers]

Thank you I truly appreciate your words in this post. Truly! But no I was personally attacked and tag teamed and all that. I am not just saying that. Why would I go saying such an untruth with a Moderator sitting here watching every post. It actually did happen! and it was very unjust! I am not looking for anyone to share my enthusiasm on this , in fact I knew from the jump that was not how it was going to go and that is not what bothers me. Its that I litterally feel I will have hell to pay (and have already) if I speak up at all at any time even if I feel it to be appropriate bout my feelings on this product. I understand what your saying but its hard to ingore what seems like a swipe at me to others , that turns into pages and pages of making and taking things personal as well as personal attack on my character -and yes that happened!

Irresistible, you have been here a long time and have contributed a lot. You deserve to express your feelings.

I have been here a long time myself, even though I don't post a lot. I understand exactly what you are saying.

I have learned a lot and I know I also have a lot to contribute as a former hairdresser and business owner, but I won't contribute when there is less than intelligent discussion going on and I certainly don't reply to those who are disrespectful. I just don't have time for it!

I do miss some of the old heads. My hair is thriving and is now past waist length, (Updating my fotki soon!) thanks in part to some of those women. (One that comes to mind is Adrienne) Those ladies had a wealth of knowledge.

I just wish there was a way to block the negative ones out. It would certainly make our learning experiance a lot better.

 

[Irresistible]

Irresistible, you have been here a long time and have contributed a lot. You deserve to express your feelings.

I have been here a long time myself, even though I don't post a lot. I understand exactly what you are saying.

I haved learned a lot and I know I have a lot to contribute, but I won't contribute when there is less than intelligent discussion going on and I certainly don't reply to those who are disrespectful.

I do miss some of the old heads. My hair is thriving, thanks in part to some of those women. (One that comes to ming is Adrienne) Those ladies had a wealth of knowledge. I just wish there was a way to block the negative ones out. It would certainly make our learning experiance a lot better.

Thank you Girl

There was just a whole different tone and vibe and air around back in that day -from today-I wish it could return to that again.

I mean they can see me like the crazy cousin in the bunch that just goes on about protein and just igg me and realize thats just me-and there is nothing more to it-just let me speak without accusations of my intentions being any different than what they truly are-I'm hoping someone can grasp that-and just let me speak on it-when I feel I want or need to-without all this taking it personal stuff- we never ,none of us would have allowed this to go down with eachother back in those days-and we all spoke on many things , openly and freely with respect , but the key that was greatly present that just doesnt seem to be now is the respect

I have a feeling nobody that tag teamed me or insulted me or made the accusations is going to come up in here and come to an agreement or apologize, although myself when I started a thread while upset realizing it shouldnt have been handled that way aplogized from my heart-its ok I dont need no apology, I dont need anything

I am going to speak up about Keratin in the ways and times I see fit , it will not be directed to those that have already heard it or have joined in previous threads, but if I see an opening or a question or a place where I feel I should express something about it. I am going to and any tag teaming , personal attacks, accuasations or thread control or people instigating a problem I am just going to do what Enchantmt said , and report it. I just want my own 'personal space' as a member here respected, as it should be, and my own room to breathe and post freely my opininion that isnt about anyone personally-its about frequent/heavy Keratin use only. You guys litterally have your own thread for these products and nobody is bothering you there, so leave me alone in the general threads as I interact with others and disrespect none of you

me and my opinions of it are not going to go away. I still think its risky , not all have the risks but that doesnt take away from the fact that I believe it is, thats not against those that are using it with success! I dont deny that fact! and will even make an extra extra point to say that in any post that I post MY opinion of frequent Keratin use on! This should be fair enough! Then that person can decide for themselves! not only that but they are always free to go to the MT/OCT thread , where I WILL not be involved in and never have out of respect! sounds fair to me!

 

[Yellowflowers]

Thank you Girl

There was just a whole different tone and vibe and air around back in that day -from today-I wish it could return to that again.

I mean they can see me like the crazy cousin in the bunch that just goes on about protein and just igg me and realize thats just me-and there is nothing more to it-just let me speak without accusations of my intentions being any different than what they truly are-I'm hoping someone can grasp that-and just let me speak on it-when I feel I want or need to-without all this taking it personal stuff- we never ,none of us would have allowed this to go down with eachother back in those days-and we all spoke on many things , openly and freely with respect , but the key that was greatly present that just doesnt seem to be now is the respect

I have a feeling nobody that tag teamed me or insulted me or made the accusations is going to come up in here and come to an agreement or apologize, although myself when I started a thread while upset realizing it shouldnt have been handled that way aplogized from my heart-its ok I dont need no apology, I dont need anything

I am going to speak up about Keratin in the ways and times I see fit , it will not be directed to those that have already heard it or have joined in previous threads, but if I see an opening or a question or a place where I feel I should express something about it. I am going to and any tag teaming , personal attacks, accuasations or thread control or people instigating a problem I am just going to do what Enchantment said , and report it. I just want my own 'personal space' as a member here respected, as it should be, and my own room to breathe and post freely my opininion that isnt about anyone personally-its about frequent Keratin use only. You guys litterally have your own thread for these products and nobody is bothering you there, so leave me alone in the general threads as I interact with others and disrespect none of you

me and my opinions of it are not going to go away. I still think its risky , not all have the risks but that doesnt take away from the fact that I believe it is, thats not against those that are using it with success! I dont deny that fact! and will even make an extra extra point to say that in any post that I post MY opinion of frequent Keratin use on! This should be fair enough! Then that person can decide for themselves! not only that but they are always free to go to the MT/OCT thread , where I WILL not be involved in and never have out of respect! sounds fair to me!

I agree. They should listen and learn. I mean look at your hair. You wouldn't have no hair if you didn't know what you were talking about.

Then if the person reading feels they can't benefit from the infromation then they need to move on. There is just no reason to insult anyone.:nono:]

 

[mistee11]

I think that all of you sisters are to be commended for wanting to bring order and respect back to this forum. When I first discovered this forum approximately 4 years ago I was amazed that it existed. It was so encouraging to see black women communicating with each other on a number of topics. It has served as a helpful guide to me over the years whenever I would on a occasion peer in to see what's happenin in your world. I just signed up this year. I too have noticed recently some negative discussions on some of the threads and I was looking for a moderator to step in. Maybe they did privately but I would be sort of concerned about the tones of some members too. Very vicious and bodacious some of them are. And that's sad -- just because it is a forum that doesn't give anyone the right to dis someone because of their opinion on a particular subject. That's not what this place represents. Harmony, Peace and Love should always be present in this forum as we encourage and admonish one another in our quest for beautiful hair. Let's also strive for inner beauty which will shine through no matter what our hair looks like or what type of products we may prefer to use.

Peace and Love

 

[Angkin73]

I have noticed the vibe of this board changing day by day also. I thought the sisterhood in here was great and so positive.That is the main reason I joined.

Even in this thread things are being rehashed, and taking away from the posts origanal intent.

I have gotten wise as to what threads not to go in I didn't come here for all that. I came here to read and learn about hair from intellegent women that have been there. They encourge you to go for it. That you can grow long beautiful hair.

I have been comimg on this board everyday since I joined, for hours at a time. Today tho, I found myself not even wanting to come on here. I did come on for a few hours, but in the search part. So, I guess you could say, I'm back to lurking. I feel more comfortable in the old threads. I can fully understand what the OP is talking about, how things used to be, just by comparing the atmosphere in the old threads to the ones now.

Heck, I thought it was going to be different on here, now I'm starting to wonder if its even woth being a member.

 

[so so chic]

I've been noticing a trend lately, actually it's been a while, this is a hair board with spin-off topics and we can all express our opinions, right? Maybe not even the littlest of topics, about haircare methods, product reviews result in the OP getting attacked. I know this is not why the boards came into existence, haven't some of you noticed that alot of the original hair diva's have not been here, either every once in a while or have been totally M.I.A? It's because some negative people are ruining it for the rest of us.

Everyone posts advice or regime's, reggie's according to what works for them, and alot of times those members who have had hair success their techniques seem to work for alot of other members too, that's what I thought this was about, not about getting personal frustrations or jealousies off by attacking someone for their hard earned hair success.
I remember when you could come on here and say that you ruined your hair by going to a scissor happy stylist or got a bad perm, color etc... and you got support and postivie words even cyber hugs, now you can hardly type a word without the feeling that someone or a couple someone's will diss, harass, and ridicule you, your post, and/or your right to post how far you've come in the hair game. Even pics aren't good enough anymore as they are coming under scrutiny even though you clearly see the person's scalp before and after press, perm, etc...

I hope that this kind of climate doesn't drive away all our hair gurus and divas cause then what would be the point of having a hair board if no one's here to give advice from experience, trial and error, and celebrate every and all hair triumphs great-lengths and short-lengths. that's all....

ITA. Everything you said is on point. I personally don't want to post many questions or threads on here because of the way people are treated. I experienced this in another forum on here, and made a promise to NEVER start a thread there againg about anything. It's sad that you can ask a question or make a statement and people be so negative. When I read something and I feel negatively about it, I just click on something else. Why make another person feel bad, by being rude, raining on their parade, or feeling the need to call them out. It's not necessary to speak on everything that someone says or does that's wrong in your eyesight, especially if not done with a kind heart and good intentions.

 

[Irresistible]

I think that all of you sisters are to be commended for wanting to bring order and respect back to this forum. When I first discovered this forum approximately 4 years ago I was amazed that it existed. It was so encouraging to see black women communicating with each other on a number of topics. It has served as a helpful guide to me over the years whenever I would on a occasion peer in to see what's happenin in your world. I just signed up this year. I too have noticed recently some negative discussions on some of the threads and I was looking for a moderator to step in. Maybe they did privately but I would be sort of concerned about the tones of some members too. Very vicious and bodacious some of them are. And that's sad -- just because it is a forum that doesn't give anyone the right to dis someone because of their opinion on a particular subject. That's not what this place represents. Harmony, Peace and Love should always be present in this forum as we encourage and admonish one another in our quest for beautiful hair. Let's also strive for inner beauty which will shine through no matter what our hair looks like or what type of products we may prefer to use.

Peace and Love

Just wanted to say I loved your post Mistee!

 

[Vshanell]

LHCF use to be one big clique of happy members. Now we have the follow the leader mentality, and the dynamics of the board are changing, you have more younger members. For many of us the reason, why we came to this board because we wanted to grow healthy and long hair. You have members coming to the board now because they heard about us from other copy cat sites. Some of the mentalities on those other sites pops up here. I talk to a lot of old heads off line, we are all saying the same thing. There use to be a time when we would get excited to see the FOM. We would be very encouraging and excited to see someone's new pics. The hair board had more harmony. Off topic was always the drama filled section but you didn't see it on Hair topics.

There was always naturals and relaxed heads on the board. It was no big deal. I learned tips from naturals and eventually transitioned to natural hair. There was an occasional heated thread but that was it. Now you keep seeing threads inflame the natural vs related debates.

I totally think that this is what has changed the dynamic of the board. I think a lot of people from the negative site came here and that's when I started noticing changes. This is something that we can't control though. We can only try to keep things as peaceful as we can

 

[PassionFruit]

well just as some think the climate of the board is changing, I feel the attitude of some "oldies", well actually only one or 2 specifically has turned me off of this forum... SInce the re-appearance of a certain one I have been spending more time elsewhere.... not because the info she is typing is valuable, but because she seems to think that because SHE said so, everyone MUST listen/read her same speech in EVERY thread and when someone has the nerve to say "we heard you the last 6793 times ya said it", she comes in with the woe is me how can they disrespect me like that

this is a community of sharing... that means GIVING info as well as TAKING IN and READING what OTHERs have to offer and knowing when to drop back and accept that others may not agree with you or others have heard your opinions and STILL may want to take the risk you are tryin to warn against.... its not like the 8937 other times you copied & pasted the SAME speech/warnings got deleted... we dont need to be browbeaten and forced to have otherwise positive threads turned around simply because this person joined years ago.... say your warning pecefully & move on... noboddy is attacking the info or you specifically just your condescending methods and fake woe is me attitude that follows

 

[clever]

I totally think that this is what has changed the dynamic of the board. I think a lot of people from the negative site came here and that's when I started noticing changes. This is something that we can't control though. We can only try to keep things as peaceful as we can

I agree.Hopefully they will see thats not how we do it over here.

 

[Irresistible]

well just as some think the climate of the board is changing, I feel the attitude of some "oldies", well actually only one or 2 specifically has turned me off of this forum... SInce the re-appearance of a certain one I have been spending more time elsewhere.... not because the info she is typing is valuable, but because she seems to think that because SHE said so, everyone MUST listen/read her same speech in EVERY thread and when someone has the nerve to say "we heard you the last 6793 times ya said it", she comes in with the woe is me how can they disrespect me like that

this is a community of sharing... that means GIVING info as well as TAKING IN and READING what OTHERs have to offer and knowing when to drop back and accept that others may not agree with you or others have heard your opinions and STILL may want to take the risk you are tryin to warn against.... its not like the 8937 other times you copied & pasted the SAME speech/warnings got deleted... we dont need to be browbeaten and forced to have otherwise positive threads turned around simply because this person joined years ago.... say your warning pecefully & move on... noboddy is attacking the info or you specifically just your condescending methods and fake woe is me attitude that follows

Here we go again!

This is making it about personal attack yet again! I did not ask anyone that already heard to me hear me again. nor can I force anyone to do anything , nor did I even try! I was posting in a thread that somoene else started that she had scalp pain from using MT , it was my right to be there and interact, as the whole point of the thread was to talk about what MT had done to her scalp and the whole tone of the thread was 'lets talk about it' and thats what I did , I did not make any personal repsonse TO YOU or any others in that thread, other than interacting. Its already been said here time and time again, that you did not have to read what I said, but instead you would rather post a post like this about me. This is dripping with personal accusations again, and personal attack yet again! saying I expect this or that, when in fact I dont and you are speaking for me and accusing me of having a woe is me attitude , when I in fact genuinely dont feel it has been fair , to suffer posts such as this over and over again! and the last round even resulted in a FLAT OUT LIE about me and my history here. There have been nothing but personal insults flying, YET nobody can post where I personally insulted anyone! Everything, just like now is because I am backed against a wall in my own defense-like this! and like now! So I see , its clear some DO NOT care to change or stop the pesonal attacks on me and stop that accusations, as this thread was going just fine until your post! When I spoke about keratin again in the thread with the one suffering scalp pain from it, I was not speaking to you personally-so once again this is unwarranted and so are your accusations, insults and speaking 'for' me!

I have said my warning peacefully each time and was more than willing to move on, in all the threads that have been locked and deleted now, it was posts LIKE THIS directed at me that were and are not peaceful nor moving on!

you at no time have to read what I write , I mean especially when it isnt even written to you directly. So in reality I am in no way forcing anything on you whatseover! This is the exact example of what should not be tolerated anymore! As I have said nothing to you......but here you are! making a personal attack again. I at no time have been condescending, or fake in anyway, so again these are just more 'personal' insults and accusations directed at me!

 

[PassionFruit]

Here we go again!

This is making it about personal attack yet again!

Im sorry, Did I mention YOU or YOUR SCREENNAME ANYWHERE in MY POST?? Why do you think THIS is about YOU?? I think you should go back & read the advice in THIS THREAD that WAS SPECIFICALLY given to YOU, namely to stop taking things personally, stop making things about you and for you to move on

 

[naskat]

This is so true. I am not really a new to the board, but I hardly post especially after reading several threads about nonsense, or where people who genuinely needed help were attacked. For instance, one mother really had a difficult time with her child's hair and was considering texturing her hair. In the thread some members attacked her and in a way called her a bad mother for a choice she was consdering. They didn't take into account that she tried several methods to manage her daughter's hair, and how upset the whole experience of detangling etc caused her child.

Also, when I first learned about the board I read in so many fotkis how the help of LHCF memebers contributed their healthy hair. But, I finally posted and I didn't get that many responses, and I explained in my thread how I really need help. I even posted a lot of pictures and a link to a video and even after all of that I didn't get that many responses. Yet, the Omarion thread was so long. I don't get it maybe because I am not a celebrity or a big name on here some people don't respond. The vibe around here has really changed, and I don't post because I don't want anyone attacking me. Furthermore, I usually read the threads about products, hair problems, and recipes. For me its all about learning about how to manage our hair and the products that work with it, not if I want to attack someone about their hair choice, products, or practices.

Wew, I it must of took a lot of courage to start this thread, because someone may come up in here and try to shut you down. Its ok to have different views but we shouldn't be belittled because of it.

 

[boomboom1027]

I think that all of you sisters are to be commended for wanting to bring order and respect back to this forum. When I first discovered this forum approximately 4 years ago I was amazed that it existed. It was so encouraging to see black women communicating with each other on a number of topics. It has served as a helpful guide to me over the years whenever I would on a occasion peer in to see what's happenin in your world. I just signed up this year. I too have noticed recently some negative discussions on some of the threads and I was looking for a moderator to step in. Maybe they did privately but I would be sort of concerned about the tones of some members too. Very vicious and bodacious some of them are. And that's sad -- just because it is a forum that doesn't give anyone the right to dis someone because of their opinion on a particular subject. That's not what this place represents. Harmony, Peace and Love should always be present in this forum as we encourage and admonish one another in our quest for beautiful hair. Let's also strive for inner beauty which will shine through no matter what our hair looks like or what type of products we may prefer to use.
Peace and Love

--------------------------------------
Very well said!

 

[SunnyDelight]

WOW - Just WOW
Ladies - I think that the OPs message has been taken to heart. Enough has been said already. We all came here because we want to grow Long, healthy hair.

CAN WE PLEASE PLEASE MOVE ON.

MODS, WHERE ARE YOU??? ITS TIME TO CLOSE THIS THREAD.

 

[Irresistible]

well just as some think the climate of the board is changing, I feel the attitude of some "oldies", well actually only one or 2 specifically has turned me off of this forum... SInce the re-appearance of a certain one I have been spending more time elsewhere.... not because the info she is typing is valuable, but because she seems to think that because SHE said so, everyone MUST listen/read her same speech in EVERY thread and when someone has the nerve to say "we heard you the last 6793 times ya said it", she comes in with the woe is me how can they disrespect me like that

this is a community of sharing... that means GIVING info as well as TAKING IN and READING what OTHERs have to offer and knowing when to drop back and accept that others may not agree with you or others have heard your opinions and STILL may want to take the risk you are tryin to warn against.... its not like the 8937 other times you copied & pasted the SAME speech/warnings got deleted... we dont need to be browbeaten and forced to have otherwise positive threads turned around simply because this person joined years ago.... say your warning pecefully & move on... noboddy is attacking the info or you specifically just your condescending methods and fake woe is me attitude that follows

Im sorry, Did I mention YOU or YOUR SCREENNAME ANYWHERE in MY POST?? Why do you think THIS is about YOU?? I think you should go back & read the advice in THIS THREAD that WAS SPECIFICALLY given to YOU, namely to stop taking things personally, stop making things about you and for you to move on

Anyone reading this , including the MODS will know just what you were saying/doing , and just who you were saying/doing it to and who your whole personal attack was about!

 

[naskat]

I don't understand why the moderators should close this thread and not the threads were people are being attacked for their hair care practices, or views. Sometimes those threads last a couple of pages. I think the genral climate on this board has changed and someone spoke on it. I see I am going back to viewing and searching the threads because its just too much drama for my leisure time. I just want to learn about hair, and for someone to help me if they can.

 

[LaNecia]

Hi Lucia ,

I agree with your original post, and that's why I just stay in lurk mode most of the time, if I'm on at all. LHCF is the only hair board worth visiting (for information) but the drama...

VWV

 

[Candycane044]

Lucia, you make an excellent point...I've been on LHCF for almost 3 years and I've noticed this as well.. It actually prevents me from saying much at all. It's terrible that anytime you say something against the grain you may literally get attacked and 'shunned' for the rest of your time on LHCF. I didn't know anyone could hold online grudges...Hopefully things change for the better and the lovely ladies that have been here for years DON'T leave because I think they have a lot of wisdom and knowledge to share.

 

[aprilj]

Hi Lucia ,

I agree with your original post, and that's why I just stay in lurk mode most of the time, if I'm on at all. LHCF is the only hair board worth visiting (for information) but the drama...

VWV

I totally agree! It's not an enjoyable atmosphere like it used to be. I lurk more than I post. It's crazy .

BTW...Hey VWV . Glad to see one of the many "Positive Oldies" come out of lurk mode.

 

[Enchantmt]

Ladies, again lets please keep this civil.

Irresistible, just like you deserve to be heard , others deserve to explain their actions also. IMO, some comments are boardline as far as being inflammatory, and I believe intended to start drama, but regardless if you keep taking the bait folx drop, you will be typing from now until the world ends. Just let it go. You arent the only one who can see through such petty attempts.

 

[Irresistible]

Ladies, again lets please keep this civil.

Irresistible, just like you deserve to be heard , others deserve to explain their actions also. IMO, some comments are boardline as far as being inflammatory, and I believe intended to start drama, but regardless if you keep taking the bait folx drop, you will be typing from now until the world ends. Just let it go. You arent the only one who can see through such petty attempts.

*Deep breath*

Ok Bait dropped! ur right its plain as day and very transparent. just wish it would stop already.......

 

[Enchantmt]

I don't understand why the moderators should close this thread and not the threads were people are being attacked for their hair care practices, or views. Sometimes those threads last a couple of pages. I think the genral climate on this board has changed and someone spoke on it. I see I am going back to viewing and searching the threads because its just too much drama for my leisure time. I just want to learn about hair, and for someone to help me if they can.

I'm not trying to close this thread, because the climate on the board has changed, IMO, its noticeable, and I'd much rather have
this contained in one thread, than carried over into each and every other thread, with folx posting paragraphs of disclaimers and getting snippy with other members. I will probably lock it tonight or tomorrow because I wont be able to keep a close eye on it, but things like this need to be aired from time to time otherwise it will take over the whole board.

As far as the other threads, we rely on on the help of members to help moderate threads. We cant read each and every post. If a thread is 83 pages long, in the hair section, its normally because its a popular item, lots of info is being exchanged, and/or people are getting good results. Such as the henna and OCT threads. Again, its a lot easier to edit a post and save the info if its reported while there is a handful of nasty responses, rather than pages. Thats how threads get locked, and if there were personal attacks, removed to keep the drama down. THE REPORT POST BUTTON IS YOUR FRIEND. Use it.