Myths about Natural or Growing Natural Hair

[ QUOTE ]
Mindymouse said:
No I think it relates more to how It's Taken, not how it's said. And when you leave out facts, that can be construed as dishonest.. That's what I said, that's what I meant. And for you to use the word Liar is totally wrong on your part. Totally Wrong.

[/ QUOTE ]

I agree with the "how it's taken" portion of your post. I can also see how not telling everything could be construed as being dishonest. However, I didn't leave out anything in detailing MY experience. Therefore, I took offense to your statement.

If need be, we can take this up in a PM.
 
[ QUOTE ]
Mindymouse said:
[ QUOTE ]
patience said:
Mindy-
It's how something is said as well as what is said. You know that as well as I do. No one is asking you to stop posting. However, I do have to agree with Pookeylou in that some "natural" threads do seem to end up with a negative stance even though it began as positive.

Also, when folks are detailing their experiences and we hear statements such as "be fully honest" it DOES sound as if you are calling people liars or are implying such whether you meant to do so or not.

[/ QUOTE ]

No I think it relates more to how It's Taken, not how it's said. And when you leave out facts, that can be construed as dishonest.. That's what I said, that's what I meant. And for you to use the word Liar is totally wrong on your part. Totally Wrong.

[/ QUOTE ]

I understand that, but at least admit your part in all of this (you did accuse others of lying). Few people argue with themselves.
 
Everyone-
I apologize in contributing to the negative tone that this thread seems to have taken. However, I DO get offended when I feel as though I'm accused of something that I did not do.

Again, my apologies!
 
[ QUOTE ]
pebbles said:
I have to agree. Let's keep this thread on track. It's a great thread for the naturals on this board to help dispel alot of the negative things said about natural hair. One woman's lie is another woman's truth. We all know that, right? If someone who's transitioning or considering transitioning sees some of their fears listed here:

1. They'll know they're not alone, and others have encountered the same things and found much of the "theories" about natural hair to be false.

2. It can give them the courage to try something they might have been a bit apprehensive to try and know that not everything negative said about natural hair is true. It's good to know that there are successful, happy, natural heads out here.

Carry on, ladies!
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[/ QUOTE ]

I agree, Pebbles. This was a wonderful and positive thread full of information and support for transitioners and those who maybe considering it.
smile.gif
 
[ QUOTE ]
pookeylou said:
[ QUOTE ]
Mindymouse said:
[ QUOTE ]
pookeylou said:
Why...someone please tell me why...

Why is it that when a natural thread is started...and the naturals defend THEIR experience...it turns into drama and we need eduction on how we word things?

If there is a format for wording a natural question so that others will not be offended...will someone please forward it to me so that I can state things properly and cover ALL scenarios?

It is disheartening that a thread like this...that was going so well and so uplifting and encourageing and helping us naturals not to feel ALONE... has to be chastised because we used the word MYTH.
It really hurts.

[/ QUOTE ]

Pookeylou, I'm sorry. And again that was not the intent. I guess we should'nt post in Natural theards, then and vice versa.

I do sense the honesty in your posts.

I think this happens because those who choose not to straighten thier hair anymore, put through a sense that they are better, and that may not be the intent at all, but that's how it comes across by some, not all.

It's kinda like quittin smoking and calling non smokers stinky addicted fools.
smirk.gif
Or losing weight and callin fat people, gross.

Because it is also a misconception that people straighten to be non-black or hate thier natural hair. But you are right, I won't post or read in Natural threads anymore. Cause it is redundant. It all boils down to choice. None is better than the other.

I just don't see Relaxed threads that compare "myths" or carry as much controversy.

My only intent in posting was just what I said. I really do'nt want those considering to stop straigtening to have false hope that it's all a bed of roses.

Peace ladies.

Now the mature people will understand that If I stop posting it's cause I'm being mature and don't want to further breed any problem. While others will view it as I posted to start something then leave.

I mean what is one supposed to do. Why can't we just state or opinion, without people feelin bad.?

[/ QUOTE ]

Peace to you sis.

I think my reaction comes on the heels of last weeks barrage of positive, thought provoking threads about natural hair getting analyzed to death, chastised, even deleted. Even though the moderators have made it clear that this is a "narurals welcome" house...it never fails that these threads end up with the same eventuality.

I have asked the same question you posed in a later comment:
"Should naturals post in only natural threads and vice versa for relaxed?" and received a booming "NO!"

Even though the mission on this site is to encourage each other to grow our hair long...the culture and language of the two heads often gets misinterpreted. Unfortunately to the detriment of some real wisdom that can be gained by all.

I know how it feels to be misrepresented and misinterpreted. No intention to do that you. I have no problem with people asking the questions. It makes me think. Those questions are what made me decide to go natural in the first place. The problem I see is one-sided censoring. Your comment on "how we word it" is one that I have seen commonly put to naturals. When we speak the truth on natural hair...it is misinterpreted as trying to take away anothers choice or forcing our views.

Absolutely no more angry feelings on my part. This is just my thoughts from my vantage point.

[/ QUOTE ]

See, I can understand & Respect you.

Thanks for relating your POV WELL. w/o Twisting.
rosebud.gif
 
[ QUOTE ]
sillygurl18 said:
Umm..... What has surprised you about natural hair care since becoming natural.

[/ QUOTE ]

That I have more styling options that I ever imagined...I can be fro'ed out, curly, straight, bantu knotted, twisted, cornrowed, braided...and STILL look phenomenal!

That my hair will NOT be dry and brittle if I keep it moisturized and take care of it.

That natural products are MUCH better for my hair and skin than the synthetic stuff sold in stores.

That being natural is SOOO much easier and less time consuming for me than having relaxed hair.

That olive oil and honey are NOT just for cooking...
 
[ QUOTE ]
sillygurl18 said:
Umm..... What has surprised you about natural hair care since becoming natural.

[/ QUOTE ]

Ooo, I can get into this
smile.gif
...

That my natural hair is very strong.

That my natural hair is very versatile.

That my natural hair can be worn in so many different styles that I never imagined before.

That my natural hair is mine and all mine. Even though it is mistaken for a weave every other day.
wink.gif


That my natural hair is like noone else's, it is unique to me.

That my natural hair is what I have taken care of and haven't had to depend on others to take care of. All this is the fruit of God's guidance.

That I love my natural hair in all its glory.
wink.gif
 
[ QUOTE ]
CarolinaAfro said:
smil3f9cf95099cff.gif
@ Bobbie

Is that my husband (Aragon) in your Avatar? You needs to back up off my man.
laugh.gif


[/ QUOTE ]

I don't think so! We'll have to throw down!
smil3f7284a95300c.gif

(Brandy and Monica comes to mind)
laugh.gif


Okay -- back to the topic.
laugh.gif
 
[ QUOTE ]
sillygurl18 said:
Umm..... What has surprised you about natural hair care since becoming natural.

[/ QUOTE ]

That natural products for my hair are cheaper (volume wise) than prepackaged hair products.

That conditioner washes ROCK!
smile.gif


That if you rock your natural hair w/ confidence people can't help but like it!

That oils are not so great for my hair in the summer(because they melt & drip onto your skin, which means ACNE city!)
 
[ QUOTE ]
pebbles said:
[ QUOTE ]
pookeylou said:
Why...someone please tell me why...

Why is it that when a natural thread is started...and the naturals defend THEIR experience...it turns into drama and we need eduction on how we word things?

If there is a format for wording a natural question so that others will not be offended...will someone please forward it to me so that I can state things properly and cover ALL scenarios?

It is disheartening that a thread like this...that was going so well and so uplifting and encourageing and helping us naturals not to feel ALONE... has to be chastised because we used the word MYTH.

It really hurts.

[/ QUOTE ]

I have to agree. Let's keep this thread on track. It's a great thread for the naturals on this board to help dispel alot of the negative things said about natural hair. One woman's lie is another woman's truth. We all know that, right? If someone who's transitioning or considering transitioning sees some of their fears listed here:

1. They'll know they're not alone, and others have encountered the same things and found much of the "theories" about natural hair to be false.

2. It can give them the courage to try something they might have been a bit apprehensive to try and know that not everything negative said about natural hair is true. It's good to know that there are successful, happy, natural heads out here.

Carry on, ladies!
cool.gif


[/ QUOTE ]

The voice of reasoning everytime.
kiss.gif
This is exactly the reason I started the thread. This thread is helping to conquer fears about trying a dramatic new look which is wearing my natural hair. I don;t want this to be a naturals only post. However I think the myths being dispelled by a natural is much more comforting. I like how the thread has been going for pretty much most of the time. Naturals voicing their experiences. The relaxed heads have been very positive in this thread too.
 
Mindy- It may be a good idea to start another thread on the Myths of growing relaxed hair or experiences with relaxed hair.
 
[ QUOTE ]
sillygurl18 said:
Umm..... What has surprised you about natural hair care since becoming natural.

[/ QUOTE ]

It's easy!
I could use a brush on wet hair.
CONDITIONER WASHES ARE THE ISH! Big ups to Sauve Coconut Conditioner here!
I still had flakes, I thought that a relaxer made my scalp flaky, but nope it's just me!
 
[ QUOTE ]
sillygurl18 said:
Umm..... What has surprised you about natural hair care since becoming natural.

[/ QUOTE ]
1) that i can go days without using a comb (finger combing)matter of fact..the only time i use a comb is to make parts in my hair for flat twisting/corn rows/braids
2) that i now have way more styling options than i ever did being relaxed.
3) that i can wash my hair every day if i choose..sit in steam rooms/saunas with no worry (make it a deep conditioning thing at the same time if i wanna)
4) that heat is NOT a necessity..(i never use heat)
5) that natural hair is beautiful in all its glory. ( and it comes in so many different forms)
6) that i could have more than 2 textures on one head
7) that natural products are the BOMB and that i can make my own.
8) that taking care of my hair is FUN!
9) that i dont let another person put their hands in my head! nor do i need to. i take care of all of my hair concerns.
10) that you can not treat natural hair like relaxed (straight hair) it is not the same and therefore the same techniques can not always be used.
 
I keep seeing people say that they can't use the same techniques they used on relaxed hair what are some tips that you would give to newly naturals or transitioning folk?
 
TracyAnnette said:
Myth: No guys will ever want to date you
Truth: I have had more players on the team since the chop than I ever had.

I found this to be true also, when I had naturals I got a lot of attention, mainly because I had a 16 inch afro...but it was all positive attention. I never had issues about having nappy hair, always taught it was beautiful. I only got a relaxer after being pressured from my family and I finally caved in. I wish I didn't because now my hair is 10 inches long since relaxed, I am just too lazy to cut it all off and start from scratch. Now I am texturized and that's okay with me but believe me it won't be something I plan on doing for the rest of my life. Growing hair is a fun challenge for me, when I cut it off it always grows back, I just want to see how long I can get it to grow with a relaxer (waistlenght) after that I will be slowly cutting out the relaxed ends and growing it to mid back lenght and get dreds. Sorry ladies with dreds but I just can't deal with "budding" stage and short dreds, In fact I was thinking about getting sisterlocks in about 4-5 years.
 
[ QUOTE ]
sillygurl18 said:
I keep seeing people say that they can't use the same techniques they used on relaxed hair what are some tips that you would give to newly naturals or transitioning folk?

[/ QUOTE ]

Excellent question:

Someone already mentioned it but...it is a definite no-no to comb natural hair dry. Especially if you are transitioning. If you put a comb through your natural roots and pull it through to your relaxed ends...the relaxed part will break. I only comb my natural hair (then my transitioning hair) with tons of conditioner on it. I also combed from the ends up.

Also...forcing the natural roots to be straight is asking for breakage. You can transition with pressing...however it really is not good for your hair. The excessive heat will cause the relaxed portion to break also.
 
[ QUOTE ]
sillygurl18 said:
I keep seeing people say that they can't use the same techniques they used on relaxed hair what are some tips that you would give to newly naturals or transitioning folk?

[/ QUOTE ]

THROW OUT ALL SMALL TEETH COMBS!!!! Trying to use them is a sure-fire way to cause yourself trauma! The end of a rattail comb may be used for parting.

Use wide tooth combs.

Detangle in the shower if you don't do so already

The fewer products on your hair, the better...at least in my case.

Water is your FRIEND!!@ Use it often as a mist, etc. Play in the rain...your hair won't mind at all!
grin.gif


Do NOT try to comb dry natural hair. You will hurt yourself.
swearing.gif
Make sure that it is at least damp first!!!

Great manipulation is NOT a requirement.

Relaxed hair products will generally NOT work well for natural hair. They tend to be EXTREMELY drying in my experience.

Play in your hair and learn to do it yourself. Natural hair salons aren't as popular as regular salons. YOU will be the best person to say what does and doesn't work for your hair.

BE PATIENT AND DON'T BE AFRAID TO TRY SOMETHING DIFFERENT..be it twists, braids, twistouts, braidouts, cornrows (WITH YOUR OWN hair), bantu knots, rollersets, strawsets, etc. Natural hair is VERY versatile...get familiar with yours and enjoy the freedom of it!

In my experience, there is NO such thing as a "bad hair day"...they don't exist when you're natural.
 
I still think that this was a great thread. I really don't get why ...nevermind i'm going to hold it in because the drama seems to have subsided *breathe*
 
I found that while my relaxed hair loved and drank up oils (WGO, Hot Six) when I applied them to wet hair, the same products just sit on top of my natural hair looking greasy.
 
[ QUOTE ]
sassygirl125 said:
I found that while my relaxed hair loved and drank up oils (WGO, Hot Six) when I applied them to wet hair, the same products just sit on top of my natural hair looking greasy.

[/ QUOTE ]

Sassygirl, what do you use to moisturize your hair now, in place of the oils?
 
[ QUOTE ]
Poetess232 said:
[ QUOTE ]
sassygirl125 said:
I found that while my relaxed hair loved and drank up oils (WGO, Hot Six) when I applied them to wet hair, the same products just sit on top of my natural hair looking greasy.

[/ QUOTE ]

Sassygirl, what do you use to moisturize your hair now, in place of the oils?

[/ QUOTE ]

Enquiring minds wanna know.
smile.gif
 
[ QUOTE ]
sassygirl125 said:
I found that while my relaxed hair loved and drank up oils (WGO, Hot Six) when I applied them to wet hair, the same products just sit on top of my natural hair looking greasy.

[/ QUOTE ]

lol..same here. my hair HATES oils with a passion. just sits there and make it greasy and doesnt do a thing. i use creamy moisturizers such as shea butter, carol's daughter healhty hair butter and have been making my own hair butters.
 
[ QUOTE ]
sbaker said:
Hey, ladies. I am curently sporting braids and seriously considering going natural. My last perm was January 30th. I have been discussing this with various friends and family. Surprisingly alot of us are clueless about natural hair. Some people have said I would be stuck with a nappy mess. I wanted you to list some of the myths you have heard about natural hair. Or surprising information you realized once going natural.

[/ QUOTE ]

YEA!!!! YEA!!!!!! YEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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[ QUOTE ]
tracyannette said:
Myth: No guys will ever want to date you
Truth: I have had more players on the team since the chop than I ever had.

Myth: You can't wear that to jobs/interviews and be successful
Truth: I have received more interviews and 2nd interviews that most of my friends. I don't have any natural friends

Myth: You won't be able to style it.
Truth: At first I couldn't, but after practice, people think my twists are done professionally. I can do roller sets, braid outs, puffs, and I am learning to do extensions.

This is all I have for now. I have to go to lunch. I will add more later.

[/ QUOTE ]

EXCELLENT!!!! Let's dispel this myth that you have to be relaxed in order for the hair to be manageable!! Well done!!!!
smile.gif
 
Sorry Ladies!

Now I use curl activator gel, small amounts of rinse-out conditioner and/or creamy leave-ins. The only time I use oil is for overnight treatments.
 
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