The Weirdest Thing Said To You During

Duchesse said:
I had a dude who was a little bit (he had a tiny tool). He would start growling while he did it ( he was also a Que) and would be like call me big daddy... He was far from a big daddy but I complied lol...
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^^Sounds like he watched "Waiting to Exhale" too many times :lol: Remember how Lionel growled at Whitney? Or the little pudgy dude with Lela Rochen:lachen:

One of my (ex) coworkers loved to date new female employees. If they were single and attractive, he would jump on it before anyone else could. Problem was, he was/is a bad breaker-upper. He dumped 4 of them badly, they in turn took to describing his sexual misdeeds in the locker room while we all changed into scrubs every day :giggle:. Turned out he liked to use the same line on all his ladies. Mid-deed, he would look them each in the eye and say "You have the most beautiful cervix" :perplexed

It baffled all of them, because how in the hayle could he see or feel their cervix? Especially since he was apparently a micro-peen :lol:. Any new single chick that started there was instantly warned, so dating opportunities dried up and he transferred.
 
Gosh this thread is hilarious. Never really anything strange said to me just done.

Once me and dude were getting it on in the closet(young, dumb and it was fun:lol:) and as he climaxes he rips out a chunk of my hair. Like literally holding a clump of it in his hand. I was through with him after that and bought a better mositurizer after I left him.


I have has the extreme pleasure of having men hung like horses, but was too inexperienced at the time to properly "sit in the stirrups". One dude was so huge that I screamed and starting fighting him as he went in and I may have kinda passed out afterwards. I can't remember:lachen:

I also had one gherkin size fella. Bless him, he was a sweetie. He was a rebound and I was horny. As we were doing it I started crying "I feel nothing, I feel nothing". Which leads him to pump furiously and me to cry hysterically. It was a double meaning because I could not feel him physically or any connection emotionally. I told my sister and she said I was a mess. My poor 18 year old self:look::rofl:
 
I was dating a school principal once and while we were having intercourse he asked me to call him sir (that's what they call male teachers in the UK). He was 45 and I was 25:look:

After that I stopped dating him because I was getting perv vibes from him due to this request.

He was a body builder too and very metro centric and posh. I also got gay vibes from Jim.

But all these vibes could have been the imagination of someone who had a narrow and binary scope of masculinity at that time.

He had an Oxbridge accent and the word poofter would come to mind when he spoke. But occasionally when we were chilling he would try and drop his secondhand/second generation fake patois on me.
 
That damn growling when you done ran your mouth and now you gotta take it...when all you really want to do is be a track star. Days later you tipsy....and running your mouth again and he reminds you "okay you gone be gritting them teeth and growling again"....so you be quiet.

This may be greek to some...but someone in this thread knows exactly the sound I'm talking about.
 
:look:
During a bout of foreplay he asked me to jack him off.
Sure bro whatever I don't know why you're asking.
Then he starts moving something fierce, I didn't really see what he was doing cause he was having fun wit da pumpum
Anyway he grabs my foot and I think he's about to eat dinner.
Nah,
He starts rubbing my foot on his dyck!
tumblr_nfd7h1IkNo1qg5o2oo1_r1_250.gif

I swear he was smacking my foot around, moving it up and down his member
I asked "WTF are you doing?"
He fixes his mouf to say "I asked if you would jack me off"
Not with my foot!!!!!! :eek:

I left.
He wanted to stick dat inside me??? After walking around all day???
tumblr_inline_nmkgd60hX41rzbdqg_500.gif
 
My boyfriend called himself trying to "spice things up". So, it was just a regular night and he was on top of me... next thing you know he starts choking me and says "this is the choke stroke!" And I just start laughing with tears in my eyes for what seemed forever as he was doing it. I felt so bad for laughing but it was hilarious to me that that was his way of trying new things lol. :rolleyes:
 
Prettiib said:
My boyfriend called himself trying to "spice things up". So, it was just a regular night and he was on top of me... next thing you know he starts choking me and says "this is the choke stroke!" And I just start laughing with tears in my eyes for what seemed forever as he was doing it. I felt so bad for laughing but it was hilarious to me that that was his way of trying new things lol. :rolleyes:
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Lol! I would have laughed too.
 
I don't have any crazy stories but a man I loved used to refer to himself as "daddy" during sex. I would just ignore it. I refuse to call any man other than my father "daddy." I had a growler too! Lol
 
This is greaaaaat-- the master splinter one NAHHHHHH lmfaooooo
I've only had one partner, and he's relatively quiet so I don't have any crazy stories lol
 
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