The Past Has Caught Up With Me

~~HoneyComb~~ said:
So to put it in short form, he's holding something against you that happened 2 years ago before you two got together?

I guess he has a pristine past.

He sound very immature and insecure.
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Exactly!! OP, I'm sorry that you are going through this but this guy sounds very immature and unstable. In 2011, it is natural to have curiosity and google to see what is out there about your SO but he does not have the right to call you out of your name over what you did before you 2 were together.

He probably did the same and worse but didn't memorialize it on the internet so he is feeling smug and superior.

Learn from this and please be careful about what you post online so that you can keep your private life more private. It's nobody's business and some things are better left offline.

Lesson learned, move upwards and onwards.
 
~Sparklingflame~ said:
I havent gone thru the whole thread yet, but are we saying that ol boy was wrong for doing a google search?

Sheeeet Id be a googling he**a if I was dating. Soon as I find out his name Im hitting the net.
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Usually you google someone's government name, this dude googled one of her usernames he probably saw on her PC. That's going too deep imo.
 
jerseygurl said:
Usually you google someone's government name, this dude googled one of her usernames he probably saw on her PC. That's going too deep imo.
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I wonder how he knew those posts were hers? Could have been another person with the same user name.
 
GraceV said:
Please re-read the bolded just so you better understand why I think this dude is a nut job.
He googled you (weird but acceptable), found stuff. TEXTED you to INSULT you, DUMPED you THEN FORGAVE, THEN INSULTED you AGAIN. Now he CAN'T bring himself to talk to you. You did something 2 years ago and this is his reaction?

Honey it looks like you may have picked another psychologically unstable guy, who appears to be emotionally abusive already: won't verbally communicate to hear your side, feels okay with insulting you in the most derogatory manner (and isn't even man enough to do it in person or verbally), CRIES over something you did years ago (can somebody say PSYCHO) and already judged you without any concern for how you may have grown or changed. Did this guy ever really care about you? Really?

Wipe your tears, you just dodged a bullet.
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Amennnnn to that!
 
Just scanned through the thread and this may be an LHCF first....100% agreement that this man is tripping.

To me any man who calls a woman a whore has issues. Worse then the b word in my opinion because it just reeks of old school sexism and judgmentalism.

Count your blessings OP that you discovered this man isn't for you early on.
 
allmundjoi said:
Slow down Mai Tai. Not even necessary to go there. I am on my droid x and part of the OPs post is not showing....just an error message. Clearly I missed something, but acting low class is a bit much. So stop. Or continue to act low class. Its your prerogative.

Sent from my DROIDX
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allmundjoi said:
Ok, smh...just went to LHCF on my browser and apparently missed all the 'whore' stuff and verbal abuse part...about 2 paragraphs. I take that back Mai Tai, I would have asked what the ***, ok maybe not exactly those words.

My droid x set me up. I retract the previous statement regarding giving him time. Smh. He showed you who he was-believe him.

Sent from my DROIDX
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Guuuuuuuuuurl, I was bout to say! Didn't mean to be harsh but when I see what I think is another person condoning and accepting a man's abusive behavior I loose all sense of cool. No hard feelings here...:yep:
 
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~Sparklingflame~ said:
I havent gone thru the whole thread yet, but are we saying that ol boy was wrong for doing a google search?

Sheeeet Id be a googling he**a if I was dating. Soon as I find out his name Im hitting the net.
Click to expand...

I sure as heck condone google. It's all about how maturely you handle what you find. This guy clearly went off the deep end with his findings.


Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
 
Men like this disgust me, DISGUST ME DEEP DOWN IN MY SOUL!! They act as if a woman should be a pure white lily untouched and delicate at all times. He sounds like a nut job, a sexist nut job.
 
TrueToHair said:
AND he took screenshots of what he found and cries over them. I'm sorry but something is wrong with him.
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He's a p*ssy, that's what's wrong with him. OP you never want to date a p*ssy b/c they like to belittle women to make themselves feel more manly. He did that by calling you out of your name, who knows how far he will go next.
 
Thank you for all your support ladies . You don't know how much it really means to me :) I decided to tell him to go to hell. He called me and I just let him have it. After I got over the sadness, I was mad as heck lol, and he called me at the right time.

I told him that he was a jerk to judge me. I did overshare but it was only about one guy. He said that he was worried I would judge him and that he would not be good enough so he acted out. I told him he went too far.

And yeah,I told him something about his mother too cause she was ratchet anyway, but that's a whole notha topic.

It hurts a little still but I will get over it. I am in school this summer, I need to tweak some lace wigs I got, and clear out some space for all these products lol. So I will try my best to keep it out my mind.
 
ImSoLexy said:
Thank you for all your support ladies . You don't know how much it really means to me :) I decided to tell him to go to hell. He called me and I just let him have it. After I got over the sadness, I was mad as heck lol, and he called me at the right time.

I told him that he was a jerk to judge me. I did overshare but it was only about one guy. He said that he was worried I would judge him and that he would not be good enough so he acted out. I told him he went too far.

And yeah,I told him something about his mother too cause she was ratchet anyway, but that's a whole notha topic.

It hurts a little still but I will get over it. I am in school this summer, I need to tweak some lace wigs I got, and clear out some space for all these products lol. So I will try my best to keep it out my mind.
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ImSoLexy, Good for you! I was gonna post in here, but the ladies had it covered. He's a ******, and don't nobody have no time for no biatches, real talk. I've mentioned (probably more than I should) that I have a colorful past. :look: I wish my man would bring that ish up. The thing is, you have to be honest. If this stuff is on the internet, all it takes is a simple google search. You might end up discussing those 8 posts more than you want. My approach was always to just go head and put the dirt out there... but early. Don't wait until they're damn near in love, men act crazy during that period. Catch it before, while you're still just kicking it, getting to know each other, etc. That way, they have time to work through whatever issues they might have, or bounce. Whatever/ *deuces to biatches.* As to the efficacy of this method, I'm in a ltr with a guy who I told the whole, unvarnished truth and, tbh, he's in awe of my skill set :giggle: but what keeps him around is the whole package. Find someone who appreciates your whole package.

Good luck! :grin:
 
ImSoLexy said:
Thank you for all your support ladies . You don't know how much it really means to me :) I decided to tell him to go to hell. He called me and I just let him have it. After I got over the sadness, I was mad as heck lol, and he called me at the right time.

I told him that he was a jerk to judge me. I did overshare but it was only about one guy. He said that he was worried I would judge him and that he would not be good enough so he acted out. I told him he went too far.

And yeah,I told him something about his mother too cause she was ratchet anyway, but that's a whole notha topic.

It hurts a little still but I will get over it. I am in school this summer, I need to tweak some lace wigs I got, and clear out some space for all these products lol. So I will try my best to keep it out my mind.
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BIG HUG OP....:grouphug:

You'll be just fine. I glad you stood up for yourself and defended your honor. You're beautiful and precious and deserve to be treated with love, tenderness, kindness and RESPECT!!!!

:yep:
 
Now that she's kicked him to the curb....he'll give chase. Men are weird like that. If she begged his forgiveness and groveled he'd be chewing his arm off to get away. But when the tables are turned he can't help wanting her even more.

Bet he got off the phone and cursed his mama out! Silly rabbit.
 
Mai Tai said:
Guuuuuuuuuurl, I was bout to say! Didn't mean to be harsh but when I see what I think is another person condoning and accepting a man's abusive behavior I loose all sense of cool. No hard feelings here...:yep:
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Lol. I didn't get the name calling, screen shots being texted, giving and taking back his 'forgiveness'-none of it. All I got was she did something that was a while ago and she hoped he get over it. Lol. I was tellin OP to stay with a donkeyhole that will probably end up on an episode of Snapped or have a movie about him on LMN. I didn't read through the posts either, just read the OP. Now I am all gun shy responding to serious posts from my droid. Sorry OP.

Sent from my DROIDX
 
ImSoLexy said:
Thank you for all your support ladies . You don't know how much it really means to me :) I decided to tell him to go to hell. He called me and I just let him have it. After I got over the sadness, I was mad as heck lol, and he called me at the right time.

I told him that he was a jerk to judge me. I did overshare but it was only about one guy. He said that he was worried I would judge him and that he would not be good enough so he acted out. I told him he went too far.

And yeah,I told him something about his mother too cause she was ratchet anyway, but that's a whole notha topic.

It hurts a little still but I will get over it. I am in school this summer, I need to tweak some lace wigs I got, and clear out some space for all these products lol. So I will try my best to keep it out my mind.
Click to expand...

I find the bold to be so ironic on his part lol.
 
shelli4018 said:
Now that she's kicked him to the curb....he'll give chase. Men are weird like that. If she begged his forgiveness and groveled he'd be chewing his arm off to get away. But when the tables are turned he can't help wanting her even more.

Bet he got off the phone and cursed his mama out! Silly rabbit.
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You nailed it! I totally agree.:yep: He's going to be blowing her up because some men are dogs. You run and they chase you. I can smell dog all over her original post. And you know he cursed his mom out, any man that can let the "w" fly, doesn't have any respect for women starting with Mom.:nono:

Lexy baby you ran and really dodged the bullet aimed straight at you. Stay gone when it comes to this nut case.
 
He sounds like a lunatic....it's ok to feel some type of way but to call you out your name over something that happened before him? Girl, please leave his crazy behind alone before he goes off over something stupid again:spinning:
 
I have a friend who deals with this also. He didn't like what she was gonna wear and said "So, what do you want to be a whore?"
I'm trying to get her to see that this guy is an ****** but she says she never been treated better by a guy (but that's really not saying much...)
 
Are you sure he's really what you described him to be. Because I can't believe that someone who is so kind will be so cruel.

I can understand his dislike and distaste for what happened but what he told you is really mean and out of character for someone you described.
 
LiftedUp said:
Are you sure he's really what you described him to be. Because I can't believe that someone who is so kind will be so cruel.

I can understand his dislike and distaste for what happened but what he told you is really mean and out of character for someone you described.
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For serious? :perplexed
 
I've only read the first post, but it sounds as if you dodged a bullet with this one. If he can't accept the full you (past & present), then that relationship was doomed from the start. (eta: read through the entire thing, and I must say, I can't believe that LHCF was this 'together' on this situation :lol: Awesome. You made the right decision too OP, imho you CAN and WILL do better than that creep. The more you accept less and less foolishness in your life, you'll make room for sensible people in general).
 
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