The Past Has Caught Up With Me

Awww OP dont cry everything will be ok. THis guy doesnt deserve you - how can someone that loves you and cares about you make you feel so bad. Please be strong....if its meant to be it will be if not, maybe God just saved you from even more heartbreak. This isnt a good start....can you ever forgot the things he said to you AND can he ever forgot this? Only get back together with him if the answer to my questions is YES :o)
 
OP, if you don't keep a journal, this may be a good time to start. I find that keeping a journal helps to give you a real picture of what's happening in your life & it also helps you to see when you are repeating certain patterns. Write down in your personal space what he did and how it made you feel.

I know that in your heart, you don't believe that you owe anyone on this Earth an apology for some old thread postings.
 
Abuse is abuse no matter how you put it. Just because he didn't raise his hand and hit you it comes in many forms. Mental, emotional, physical..whatever. If it messes with your SELF worth -it's abuse. No man or woman should hit (with hand or with tongue).
He is showing you who he is and you need to recognize. Good Luck and HUGS to you for having to deal with it, but in time you will see if you choose to stay.
 
So glad my girls got this, cuz I was about to go in.. Okay with googlin you, but alla dat other stuff is unnecessary...
 
I have Googled someone I am dating. I don't see the harm in it. I don't think it makes one crazy to do so. I am not looking for anything particular but just being curious with a new relationship. Its no different than asking around about someone. But I know if you go looking you must be careful of what you may find.

In terms of what he said, I think it depends on what your post actually said. If he doesn't want to go out with you because of something you said, then fine. But he handled it in the wrong manner. The name calling was childish and you should not be with someone that would result to such name calling.

I do belive in allowing people to leave the past in the past. You didn't know him then and should not be charged with youthful trangressions just because he was snooping.
 
nappystorm said:
I don't know what post you were reading but I never said he should have reacted like that. Nor did I say she should stay or that he had the right to call her names. Quite the opposite, actually. I simply said I'm not at at him for Googling. More people should do it but that's another thread :look:

I've posted some ig'nant ish online and the person has every right discontinue the relationship because of it but I'll be damn if he gets away with calling me a whore. I say either get the posts removed or inform the next guy beforehand.
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I was actually agreeing with you:yep:, I just added on to that. One can google a person all they want but be mature about whatever results they get. It reminds me of the saying "be careful what you wish for..."
 
jerseygurl said:
I was actually agreeing with you:yep:, I just added on to that. One can google a person all they want but be mature about whatever results they get. It reminds me of the saying "be careful what you wish for..."
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Oh okay. I'm sorry. :kiss:

I thought you were accusing me of co-signing monkey doodleness :lol:
 
His mother probably told hm we're whores, he goggles you up, saw the stuff you wrote and decided to agree with mommy

btw were you there when hs mom told him sh or did he tell YOU? If his stupid kokoye butt told you then that means he feel;s you should feel flattred that he decided to date you.

The fact that you were begging a dude that straght called you a whore tells me you're still affected by the abuse of your past relationship

Delete this imbecile from your phone and move on.
 
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I'm sorry lady. Give him time to think, hes surprised and angry right now, he will come around. When he's ready to talk let him know how you've changed. Goodluck.

Sent from my DROIDX
 
NaijaTroll said:
His mother probably told hm we're whores, he goggles you up, saw the stuff you wrong and decided to agree with mommy

btw were you there when hs mom told him sh or did he tell YOU? If his stupid kokoye butt told you then that means he feel;s you should feel flattred that he decided to date you.

The fact that you were begging a dude that straght called you a whore tells me you're still affected by the abuse of your past relationship

Delete this imbecile from your phone and move on.
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OT: :dighole: I literally did a double take :lachen: I haven't heard that word in a long time.
 
1) BELIEVE you deserve better
2) He had NO right to call you a whore and his overreaction is a billboard sign that he is mentally unstable. You did nothing wrong other than perhaps overshare your personal business online.
3) Take him back & those screenshots will be brought up EVERYtime you argue. He may even go further & threaten to share them with friends & family. Take him back & he will make you miserable.
4) I'm 100% sure if you got a chance to investigate what happened in his past relationships you'll find out this guy is a nutcase & abusive.

I wish you the best; please take heed to the numerous warnings posted about this guy.
 
allmundjoi said:
I'm sorry lady. Give him time to think, hes surprised and angry right now, he will come around. When he's ready to talk let him know how you've changed. Goodluck.

Sent from my DROIDX
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allmundjoi He will come around to what? Are you suggesting she give him time to calm down and then try to proceed in having a relationship with him?
 
allmundjoi said:
I'm sorry lady. Give him time to think, hes surprised and angry right now, he will come around. When he's ready to talk let him know how you've changed. Goodluck.

Sent from my DROIDX
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Uhhhh...Seriously...What the *** is wrong with you? Did you even read the OP?
 
Mai Tai said:
Uhhhh...Seriously...What the *** is wrong with you? Did you even read the OP?
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^^Couldn't help but chuckle a bit :lol:

ImsoLexy that man is not the man of your dreams. I hope after reading the responses in this thread you realize this. He is no loss at all. The man is at the very least immature, insecure and mentally abusive.
 
^^:lachen:^^
Y'all know we are just telling her to leave because we are angry, bitter broads that can't keep a man and we are trying to keep everyone just as miserable as we are.
 
It would take me several paragraphs to get into just how troubled this man most likely is and what could possibly happen down the road if you continue with him. Suffice it to say, this man has serious issues. I hope you don't have to learn the hard way. You were in one abusive relationship. Please do not get caught up in another. Him flipping out and calling you a whore should be a BIG red flag to you.
 
nappystorm said:
^^:lachen:^^
Y'all know we are just telling her to leave because we are angry, bitter broads that can't keep a man and we are trying to keep everyone just as miserable as we are.
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:lol::lol: I couldn't help thinking of that thread accusing folks on here of always sayin "leave him girl" but with the threads lately .. I mean what else can one say? There's no workin with this stuff unless you think having a man is worth being emotionally abused for the long term. But hey.. maybe that works for some and I'm just trippin.
 
Mai Tai said:
Uhhhh...Seriously...What the *** is wrong with you? Did you even read the OP?
Click to expand...

Slow down Mai Tai. Not even necessary to go there. I am on my droid x and part of the OPs post is not showing....just an error message. Clearly I missed something, but acting low class is a bit much. So stop. Or continue to act low class. Its your prerogative.

Sent from my DROIDX
 
Raspberry said:
:lol::lol: I couldn't help thinking of that thread accusing folks on here of always sayin "leave him girl" but with the threads lately .. I mean what else can one say? There's no workin with this stuff unless you think having a man is worth being emotionally abused for the long term. But hey.. maybe that works for some and I'm just trippin.
Click to expand...

That's why I'm confused. Granted, it's one thing to tell someone to up and leave a marriage but why is it "hating" or "jealousy" to tell someone to leave an abusive, unhealthy relationship with someone whom you have no ties? If he is acting a fool in the first few months when people are usually on their best behavior, then what's is going to happen 5 years down the road?
 
Dayum.

OP he sounds kinda....unstable. Like really. This is a sign of more of the same to come.

My DH would die a thousand deaths if he knew what I did before we got together. :giggle: Thats why he doesnt ask. If this guy knew he wouldnt be able to handle it, why did he read it? Moth to a flame I guess.

:bighug:
 
Ok, smh...just went to LHCF on my browser and apparently missed all the 'whore' stuff and verbal abuse part...about 2 paragraphs. I take that back Mai Tai, I would have asked what the ***, ok maybe not exactly those words.

My droid x set me up. I retract the previous statement regarding giving him time. Smh. He showed you who he was-believe him.

Sent from my DROIDX
 
I havent gone thru the whole thread yet, but are we saying that ol boy was wrong for doing a google search?

Sheeeet Id be a googling he**a if I was dating. Soon as I find out his name Im hitting the net.
 
So to put it in short form, he's holding something against you that happened 2 years ago before you two got together?

I guess he has a pristine past.

He sound very immature and insecure.
 
I totally agree with everyone else, please ditch this insecure unstable nutcase and concentrate on moving forward to the next step, which is figuring out what you need to do to quit repeating this same pattern of abusive men.

I let a man do the same thing to me. Knew about stuff in my past, he was passive aggressive/slick with it tho, never outright called me a whore, but would always make sly comments suggesting it. He claimed he was over it, but he wasn't, he never truly respected me. By the time our relationship was over I felt like I was the scum of the earth, I felt as low as as a wad of chewed up gum and trash stuck to the bottom of someone's foot. I'm talking low. It took me a while and a lot of hard work/deep soul searching to start to feel worth something again; trust me, you do not want to have to go through that. Be glad he showed his @ss early in the game. Don't do this OP, don't put up with that foolishness and let someone else determine your worth. This fool ain't God, its not his place to cast judgement on you.
 
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