The candid questions regarding relationships thread (for grown folks)

keyawarren said:
1) Practice :look:. When I was in an LTR I used to practice sliding the D down my throat slow. I'd keep it in my mind that I'm not being choked. Once you get used to his penis hitting the back of your throat, you'll be less likely to gag since it isn't an uwelcome surprise.

Also, keep control of the blow job. Don't let him start f*cking your face. That will definitely make you gag...unless you want that effect.

2) This is normal. I mean, it's where semen is supposed to go. If you trust the guy, then go for it. If you're not on the pill I hope you're not against Plan B.
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It's weird. He said he doesn't like blow jobs all that much but likes his balls sucked/licked while I give him a hand job. Ok fine. But my hand/arm gets tired before he c*ms. Dude has too much control over his ejaculations. I like it because it makes the PIV sessions longer but damn it when I give a bj I want that finish! I earned it!

I have an IUD in place. But he wants to use condoms just in case. So I'm not sure how or if I want or divulge my desire.
 
^Is him cumming within a condom not enough? you can still do your "made you cum" dance :lol:

dude that are such control freaks that they can get with the program when it comes to bjs creep me out. I just find it weird. early morning attack might be best :lol:
 
FelaShrine said:
^Is him cumming within a condom not enough? you can still do your "made you cum" dance :lol:

dude that are such control freaks that they can get with the program when it comes to bjs creep me out. I just find it weird. early morning attack might be best :lol:
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See that's just it! He never cums! Legit 1.5 hours of getting it in and NOTHING. And then he came when I did the tea bagging. Second time I don't think he ever came. If he did it was while I was completely exhausted and couldn't relish in it lmao. He says, "your pleasure is my pleasure. " so I guess I shouldn't be complaining.
 
Kegals. Yes. They work. Also period sex. Wowza.

I also practiced my cowgirl. I rode myself to two orgasms (he gave me a few beforehand). I was doing Kegals while riding getting into my zone not really caring about him, just my own pleasure, and all of a sudden I hear "I'm gonna cum!" He couldn't hold it (he's usually very in control of when he cums. I have to "give him permission" to do so after a while so this was a surprise). I was shocked. Score one for me!
 
On another note...I think it disappointed my ex that I couldn't reach with penetration.
Only oral can do it and HE was the only one who achieved that because he was interested in learning my body and what pleases me.
I feel like it could be a problem in most relationships for me. Like the guy would never be able to beat his chest claiming that he can make me arrive.

I feel ashamed.
 
Fine 4s said:
I've never gotten to that point and always wondered if I wasn't doing it right.
I'd be proud if I could though lol
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YES! That's how I feel too. When it FINALLY happened I was so excited! For me it was making sure I was doing it right/giving him pleasure (and him not faking to make me feel better).
 
Fine 4s said:
On another note...I think it disappointed my ex that I couldn't reach with penetration.
Only oral can do it and HE was the only one who achieved that because he was interested in learning my body and what pleases me.
I feel like it could be a problem in most relationships for me. Like the guy would never be able to beat his chest claiming that he can make me arrive.

I feel ashamed.
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Please don't be ashamed. It happens to a lot of women. When I was reading on it (because my first time I didn't orgasm either) different positions may help (it will help his penis hit your g-spot) and also having you or him stimulate your clit while he's penetrating.
 
Thanks for the support @aviddiva77
I usually can arrive if I'm on top. He wasn't use to that position so at first he wouldn't last. As we got more comfortable with that position he was able to last longer but for me, it would still take too long and we'd just give up. LOL
Clearly my body wants clitoral stimulation but I'm unsure how to do that while penetration is going on...
That seems like so much work and awkward position lol
I don't know how to work on that now that I have no partner though....
 
Fine 4s said:
Thanks for the support @aviddiva77
I usually can arrive if I'm on top. He wasn't use to that position so at first he wouldn't last. As we got more comfortable with that position he was able to last longer but for me, it would still take too long and we'd just give up. LOL
Clearly my body wants clitoral stimulation but I'm unsure how to do that while penetration is going on...
That seems like so much work and awkward position lol
I don't know how to work on that now that I have no partner though....
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For clitorial stimulation when he's on top he can be on his knees and rub your clit while you hold one or both legs up. also you can rub it while he penetrates you. also you can put your legs over his shoulder and meet his thrusts which will cause your pelvis to rub against his. while doing doggy style he or you can rub your clit, that position gives amazing o's cause of the derp penetration. i always tell guys no matter what position you're in find someway to have contact with the clit.
 
@luving me
I think I know this but I don't particularly enjoy it either or I just can't figure it out.
The fingers and hands seem to be too rough and I like more teasing then rubbing, too irritating.
Would you suggest maybe lubricating the finger as they do it? I also don't enjoy masturbation with fingers either (when I used to years ago). I need something else to rub up against the clit.
Just the thought of the constant friction on my clitoris makes me cringe....it needs to be soft.
Even the tongue can feel too forceful or harsh (not sure of the word).
I hope I'm making myself clear because I need to work on this....
 
Fine 4s said:
@luving me
I think I know this but I don't particularly enjoy it either or I just can't figure it out.
The fingers and hands seem to be too rough and I like more teasing then rubbing, too irritating.
Would you suggest maybe lubricating the finger as they do it? I also don't enjoy masturbation with fingers either (when I used to years ago). I need something else to rub up against the clit.
Just the thought of the constant friction on my clitoris makes me cringe....it needs to be soft.
Even the tongue can feel too forceful or harsh (not sure of the word).
I hope I'm making myself clear because I need to work on this....
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I would suggest he wet his fingers with his mouth vs lube. The warm fingers coupled with a gentle rub will feel good. The key is slow deep thrusts while rubbing the clit, it'll build up to a strong o.

eta: when i say rubbing i mean a soft gentle massage with the fingers.
 
luving me said:
I would suggest he wet his fingers with his mouth vs lube. The warm fingers coupled with a gentle rub will feel good. The key is slow deep thrusts while rubbing the clit, it'll build up to a strong o.

eta: when i say rubbing i mean a soft gentle massage with the fingers.
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Yeah! No porno forceful rubbing here!
Fine 4s said:
Thanks for the support @aviddiva77
I usually can arrive if I'm on top. He wasn't use to that position so at first he wouldn't last. As we got more comfortable with that position he was able to last longer but for me, it would still take too long and we'd just give up. LOL
Clearly my body wants clitoral stimulation but I'm unsure how to do that while penetration is going on...
That seems like so much work and awkward position lol
I don't know how to work on that now that I have no partner though....
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Yeah it is HARD to do clit stimulation and penetration while masturbating unless you're flexible, or you have a toy that can stick to a flat surface.

But you can practice doing kegals! That helps with orgasms. And possibly finding a man who can last longer :look: :giggle: cuz that type of **** pisses me off. He should be doing his best to make sure YOU got yours before he has his. :bighug:

Cuz you're right. Cowgirl really gets the O going but if he couldn't last until you get one... Makes me frustrated for you. Do some breathing/mind exercises man! Pleasure your damn woman! But he's your ex for a reason.
 
@DarkJoy
I've attempted to do that but I could never really stop it's sooooo good lol
But really, I want to be able to arrive with the peen because psychologically, I think it messes with them.
BTW, I enjoy my sess life, I can go on like this forever. I just feel badly for the man because he feels lesser than.
I've read stories online where the guy left the relationship because he just didn't feel manly enough.
I don't want that to happen to me :'(
 
I've never heard men be shy about BJs! What's that?!

Several former lovers have mentioned that they've had women who were real bad at it. They were never shy about receiving though. Some couldn't finish that way either.
 
Fine 4s said:
@DarkJoy
I've attempted to do that but I could never really stop it's sooooo good lol
But really, I want to be able to arrive with the peen because psychologically, I think it messes with them.
BTW, I enjoy my sess life, I can go on like this forever. I just feel badly for the man because he feels lesser than.
I've read stories online where the guy left the relationship because he just didn't feel manly enough.
I don't want that to happen to me :'(
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Meh men are fine. That's why they should help you out first, then attend to their own needs. They just need to know how to make you finish and not worry that a particular way doesn't work for you.

Also you're not a rarity. I'm sure the guys know other women who didn't finish from penetration only. I think movies and such give the wrong impression of how things finish for many people tbh.

Don't worry about it. They'll be alright and you'll get yours.

ETA: I'm sure if the guy doesn't feel manly, there's more to it.
 
What do you guys recommend for someone who's been celibate for years and looking to get it regular and often?

Should one start with a fake phallus? :look:
 
CurlyMoo said:
What do you guys recommend for someone who's been celibate for years and looking to get it regular and often?

Should one start with a fake phallus? :look:
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Make sure when you're with the real thing he is gentle and takes his time- TRUST ME! I just went thru this and it was like losing my V card all over again TMI-> (with the bleeding 'n all)
And honestly, it wouldn't have been a bad thing if he was a lil' smaller too:look:
 
Jas123 said:
Make sure when you're with the real thing he is gentle and takes his time- TRUST ME! I just went thru this and it was like losing my V card all over again TMI-> (with the bleeding 'n all)
And honestly, it wouldn't have been a bad thing if he was a lil' smaller too:look:
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79512-jack-sparrow-scream-gif-opUW.gif

So you recommend the fake phallus?
I didn't even consider this, this adds a wrinkle to my fantasies of pure ecstasy.
 
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