T.O. says the women he dates don't wear scarfs to bed

[Saffirejuiliet]

I wear my scarf all the time and my SO does not mind because it keeps my hair healthy. IMHO, T.O. had no room to talk about women wearing scarves when his big-self was wearing red pajamas with the feet on them like a three year old! Yeah, I watch the episode because my SO actually likes it although I do not care for it much erplexed.

 

[chicacanella]

I heard that he is/was dating Jessica White...she seems like she would wear a scarf to bed

But what do I know :crazy:

I don't know...she looks like one of those "exotic" types to me. He says those are the type of women he dates.

And women bend over backwards to keep the "fantasy" alive. A man can come to bed with a five o'clock shadow, sweat stained t-shirt, and boxers that are one hole away from being ripped to shreads and it's cool. But women have to be on point in the dark AND when everyone's eyes are closed. Whatever.

Yeah, I think the standards won't be as balanced as we like but at least a little more balanced than it is now.

I'm well aware that men are visual creatures, but no one looks like a beauty queen at night unless they are wearing makeup and have their hair perfectly coiffed. Now if you're wearing one all day, we have a problem. The guys I've dated never had an issue with it and thought I looked sexy in my pinup style leopard print scarf regardless, so maybe I just can't relate.

And it's not just a black thing. White women have been sleeping in pink sponge rollers and pin curls for decades--sacrificing comfort at night to look hot during the day. Didn't seem like much of a problem then.

Yeah, some do sleep in those foam rollers

Not with me he can't.

Yeah, I agree Jada. That's just nasty!

oh well. he's not my man. he dosen't have to like scarves. people have preferences.. and i can respect that. i don't like men with bald heads and alien faces.. imo, TO is one of those men that i'm just not facially attracted to. no doubt, he has a nice body.. but he can hop his alien face in bed with his non scarf wearing woman. makes me no difference. i'mma hop in bed with dh, who happens to think my scarf is cute.

To the bolded: Hillarious!

 

[DragonPearl]

True. She made the head scarf sound like a sentence that comes along with dating a black woman and for a lot of black men that just isnt sexy. It sounded like a complete turn off. But as one of the other ladies stated here If a man loves you he won't care what you wear on your head

LOL!!!!!

 

[DragonPearl]

i know a bunch of them too and they have jacked up hair and have to rely on a stylist or a curling iron daily.

I don't wear scarves either and I haven't been to a stylist in years and I don't use curling iron daily. But my hair won't grow past APL.

 

[Choclatcotton]

Dear T.O.,

Sit down and shut up. Thank you in advance.

Warmest Regards,

MoMo

MOMO girl, you are wrong for that crazy! siggie

 

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

...I have Dominican homegirls who wear scarfs. And no, not Black dominican homegirls with 3c/4a/4b... I'm talking "stereotypical" hispanic 2 and 3 type. It's not relegated to just Black women. Besides, most women of any race have to tie up their hair, put rollers in it, or do SOMETHING to keep it looking nice or prepared for the next day, regardless of what television shows you.

I go with and without scarves and coverage... when I'm ina wig phase, I wear wigs to bed... when I'm not in wig phase... it's a bun or wash and go. I have a satin pillowcase... AND a satin bed set as well.

"Tying hair up at night" is not a black thing... it's a protective thing.

 

[Bunny77]

i know a bunch of them too and they have jacked up hair and have to rely on a stylist or a curling iron daily.

Glad I'm not like them! Tee hee!

 

[TrueBeliever]

I thought most women of all races put their hair up some kind of way for bed.
Whether it's a scarf, braid, ponytail, rollers, whatever.

All types of women do this they're just not doing it when they're with TO. Besides, he is straight ugly, he needs to be wearing a paper bag to bed.

 

[MRJ1972]

Oh, so TO "aking" like he dont know anything about women wearing scarfs to bed, huh????

 

[PhonyBaloney500]

It's fine if he doesn't think it's sexy but what I don't get is why he's acting all brand new ("what is that?"According to OP--missed that part of the episode) like he don't know some black women wear SOMETHING on their heads at night (grandma he's gonna be crying to perhaps? Ma?). GOOWTBS!

 

[FluffyRed]

I know a guy like that. He told me I was pretty, but he doesn't date girls with "black girl hair."

I was so crushed.
































NOT!!!

He's an a--hole, and he dates yt girls whose families won't accept him, so they use him up and dump him. LOL. Idiot. He deserves what the hell he gets.

 

[Bunny77]

He's an a--hole, and he dates yt girls whose families won't accept him, so they use him up and dump him. LOL. Idiot. He deserves what the hell he gets.

Wait, wait... but I thought that black guys said that white dudes only use black women for sex and their families don't accept them.

But all white families love black guys and black guys never get used for sex by white women, right? Right?

 

[lexi08]

Wait, wait... but I thought that black guys said that white dudes only use black women for sex and their families don't accept them.

But all white families love black guys and black guys never get used for sex by white women, right? Right?

Uhmmm yeah. There are some black men that don't get this. They are not exempt. There are plenty of Becky's that won't bring them home to family Yet they worship the ground these chics walk on.

 

[bbdgirl]

I thought most women of all races put their hair up some kind of way for bed.
Whether it's a scarf, braid, ponytail, rollers, whatever.

All types of women do this they're just not doing it when they're with TO. Besides, he is straight ugly, he needs to be wearing a paper bag to bed.

no you didn't!!!

 

[brg240]

you know I've never warn a scarf to bed and I really can't remember my mom wearing one. I generally just wear a bonnet lol

maybe I should start my brother keeps telling me I need to wrap my hair.

 

[MyHeavenlyFatherKnows]

T.O. needs to be put on mute.

I don't know anything about the "women" he dates but I will say that no, most women probably don't wrap their hair at night for one night stands with rich people

In terms of how it looks---it looks like you have a scarf on your head. If your DH doesn't like it (cause you are covering up your gawjus hair) or just b/c you want to maintain more of your sexy---buy a satin pillowcase and pin your hair. Sometimes during what another poster called "the show" the scarf definitely is, um...removed...but that's okay.

My issue is actually with the lady who said basically that she wasn't trying to look cute for anybody....that really upset me. Why do black women always need to appear so "independent," cold and defensive???!!! She should have just said that she wanted to protect her hair and this helps to keep it healthy AND that he was sooooo not her target audience that looking like whatEVER in front of him was of no consequence to her.

I don't see anything wrong with looking cute for DH---clearly you should look cute for yourself too, but I mean, you dooooo expect this person to feel valued and spend the rest of their life with you.

trife. just trife. TO doesn't sound like a loss.

Oh and to the poster who was surprised black wasn't considered exotic---I don't think in the States that your "traditional" (crayola brown skin, black 4a hair) black woman is considered exotic--I think your lighter varieties, your hazel eyed varieties, your 3c-ish varieties however could be considered "exotic."--the kind where you have to ask "is she black?" or "she's half what?" Jennifer Freeman comes to mind as possibly being an "exotic" black woman who also (huge assumption) could do the head scarf/satin pillow thing as an option but not as a "requirement." Otherwise, I think black women are only exotic in other countries. I think 'exotic' has come to mean that it doesn't fit neatly into any category, which is why curly (easily straightened) hair and or striking eyes and "mixed" looking skin tones generally describe those women.

rant over. back to work.

 

[fanofau1977]

Going to bed with him I would have to wear a scarf somewhere, even if its to cover my eyes from the agony of looking at him.

 

[ClassicBeauty]

I could hear my younger brother saying the same thing. My mom never wrapped or rolled her hair at night, so I didn't grow up doing it either. I learned how to wrap my hair when I got to college, and now I don't wrap it (or roll it)except the first night after I straighten it. I tried wrapping every night, but it's just not for me. I also sleep in one place- with no movement.

My little brother didn't grow up around women wrapping and rolling their hair. He also didn't see us in sweat pants and big old T-shirts. We always had PJs and night gowns. His expectations will be different. He actually told a girlfriend in high school that she should do her hair like his sister because he didn't like those styles she wore. Imagine a 10th grade boy trying to tell his girlfriend that she should rollerset her hair. LOL

I don't think any guy LIKES head scarfs. Some are more tolerant than others, but the would prefer to run their fingers through our hair. As for wanting a "fantasy girl"... It's TRUE. They want us to be perfect- sugar and spice and everything nice- but they don't want to know about the maintenance. Just like they know we have to go to the restroom, but most guys don't want to hear it, see it, smell it, etc. They just want us to be perfect all the time. I'm sorry, but it's true. There are exceptions, but most are that way. Deal with it or find an exception!

 

[Vshanell]

I'm sorry but if you are with someone who is so superficial that they need you to look "perfect" while you....and him are sleeping then maybe you should re-think things.

It starts with a scarf then you know what.....once you get a little age on you and you are no longer young and glamorous then what? Hmmm.....where'd he go??? Overly superficial men are not gonna take it well when you don't look as hot anymore.

I just can't stand people that are so superficial and the whole scarf thing is the stupidest thing I've ever heard. Ohh you're not glamor girl while you sleep....so what get over it!

Besides, what is so wrong with a pretty silk scarf? Women wear headwraps all the time and they can look sexy.

And T.I. can shove it with his Chewbacca lookin' self.

 

[Vshanell]

There are ways to make a headscarf at nighttime look sexy. You can wear animal printed silk scarfs(scarves?) or ones that match your pjs, tie it gypsy style,and still look attractive while you maintain your doo.

If I was a man, I wouldn't want to see my wife wearing a jiffy pop bonnet every night, or her dirty, graying with frayed edges and floral print head scarf tied like a turban to bed. Not cute.

Who is T.O btw?

Exactly what I was trying to say....you can make scarves look pretty. Go on youtube and look up different ways to tie headwraps....they are very stylish and pretty and also not hard to do. Just pick a simple one, it dosen't have to be anything complecated....and go out and find some really pretty scarves to match your nightwear.

 

[Mis007]

Yet another reason on why i don't date black women, phew It's obvious these black male celebs got way too much time hence the ish that they be sprouting.

 

[AtlantaJJ]

I have 6 pillows on my bed, the two I sleep on are satin. I tie my head up too but just in case, I have a back up plan

I have not and would not watch that show because I try not to indulge my brain in nonsense.

 

[Zaynab]

I could hear my younger brother saying the same thing. My mom never wrapped or rolled her hair at night, so I didn't grow up doing it either. I learned how to wrap my hair when I got to college, and now I don't wrap it (or roll it)except the first night after I straighten it. I tried wrapping every night, but it's just not for me. I also sleep in one place- with no movement.

My little brother didn't grow up around women wrapping and rolling their hair. He also didn't see us in sweat pants and big old T-shirts. We always had PJs and night gowns. His expectations will be different. He actually told a girlfriend in high school that she should do her hair like his sister because he didn't like those styles she wore. Imagine a 10th grade boy trying to tell his girlfriend that she should rollerset her hair. LOL

I don't think any guy LIKES head scarfs. Some are more tolerant than others, but the would prefer to run their fingers through our hair. As for wanting a "fantasy girl"... It's TRUE. They want us to be perfect- sugar and spice and everything nice- but they don't want to know about the maintenance. Just like they know we have to go to the restroom, but most guys don't want to hear it, see it, smell it, etc. They just want us to be perfect all the time. I'm sorry, but it's true. There are exceptions, but most are that way. Deal with it or find an exception!

My dh wouldn't want me to wear a head scarf to bed I never would and I never have. I guess I don't see what the big deal is with what T.O said, I guess b/c it's coming from him.

I gotta say I didn't always like T.O. but when I saw him suck that chick's bottom lip in the hot tub His taco meat and bald head started looking pretty good to me

 

[Vshanell]

^^I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.

 

[MD_Lady]

To each their own, but

I'm sorry but if you are with someone who is so superficial that they need you to look "perfect" while you....and him are sleeping then maybe you should re-think things.

It starts with a scarf then you know what.....once you get a little age on you and you are no longer young and glamorous then what? Hmmm I just can't stand people that are so superficial and the whole scarf thing is the stupidest thing I've ever heard. Ohh you're not glamor girl while you sleep....so what get over it!

Besides, what is so wrong with a pretty silk scarf? Women wear headwraps all the time and they can look sexy.

And T.I. can shove it with his Chewbacca lookin' self.

I gotta give you a on the bolded. Preferences are one thing, but they are often different from reality. Women accept that and I don't see why men shouldn't be expected to accept this too. *shrug* Of course, I'm speaking of men in general. As for T.O. and his comment, grown men wearing pajamas with feet don't have much room to talk about what anyone wears to bed.

 

[Zaynab]

^^I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.

Girl it was sexy

 

[Summer_Rain]

I gotta say I didn't always like T.O. but when I saw him suck that chick's bottom lip in the hot tub His taco meat and bald head started looking pretty good to me

Oh my!! When was this and where can I see ??

 

[Zaynab]

Oh my!! When was this and where can I see ??

When he called the realtor chick over--slutty looking vietnamese chick They were in the jaccuzzi, next thing you know she's rubbing that bald head, they start kissing...then he sucks her lips...I was sitting on the edge of my chair.... I think it's the first episode.

 

[Tee]

When I was dating, YEAH, I didnt pull out the scarf right away either. If he had a wife instead of sleeping with all these random chicks, he would understand.

If we are sleeping, there is no big deal. But if we are 'making marriage' then yeah, the scarf needs to come off.

 

[Transformer]

I feel like I was raised in the dark ages. Mom, nor sisters ever "scarfed" their hair. Didn't know about the practice until I stayed at a HBCU college dorm.

I don't do stylist, curling irons, or "scarf" my hair. I also can't imagine DH EVER putting a "Do-Rag" on his head---EVER!