Steve Harvey’s Surprising Advice For Single Woman: Stop Looking

[londontresses]

Steve Harvey is known for giving it to his fans straight, and he didn’t disappoint during his appearance as host of Essence Festival’s first-ever dating game. While the best-selling author has sold millions of books schooling ladies on how to Think Like A Man, the Family Feud host had some advice for single ladies looking for a mate.

“I suggest you stop,” he told the packed crowd.

“You looking for a man is not going to work because you’re not a hunter,” Harvey explained.

According to Harvey women “don’t even enjoy the hunt,” but men “hunt all day” until they find what they want.

While some women may balk at Harvey’s no-holds-barred advice, he did tell single women what they could do to improve their chance at love.

“What you are excellent at is what men are not. You have the ability to attract a man, and you already know how to do that,” he said, explaining women shouldn’t be actively on the prowl for a man.

On the other hand, Harvey cautioned women against being too easily impressed with minimal action or attention from a man either.

Still, Harvey drove home his point again that women shouldn’t be looking for a man because while women can attract a mate they “do not have the ability to find one.”




Even if you can't stand Steve do you agree with his advice? Personally I'd like to know what his advice means in practice.

 

[Brwnbeauti]

I just told a gf of mine to stop seeking out men. It puts her in the position where she ends up doing the courting which is gross and disastrous imo

 

[CaraWalker]

thank you steve omg i am so grateful your kindness is unparalleled now if i may ask a small favor would it be possible for you to devote some of your time and energy to giving some advice to black men omg you are also a black man i think you are would be an expert in that area it seems like a really good place for you to be making comments and giving advice could you possibly direct your energy there omg thanks so much youre a saint kbye

 

[*CherryPie*]

I can't stand Steve Harvey, but, he is right. I've been saying that for MANY YEARS. People give me a strange look when I say it.

Even if you can't stand Steve do you agree with his advice? Personally I'd like to know what his advice means in practice.

 

[*CherryPie*]

He's giving it because women keep asking him for advice. The women need to stop because I'm tired of Steve.

thank you steve omg i am so grateful your kindness is unparalleled now if i may ask a small favor would it be possible for you to devote some of your time and energy to giving some advice to black men omg you are also a black man i think you are would be an expert in that area it seems like a really good place for you to be making comments and giving advice could you possibly direct your energy there omg thanks so much youre a saint kbye

 

[Belle Du Jour]

He's right but I hate that he feels that he is a relationship guru all of a sudden.

 

[Black Ambrosia]

^^^ He's written 2 or 3 books, has 2 movies based on those books, and talks about dating everyday on either his radio or talk show. I don't think this is all of a sudden...

 

[tibb1908]

What exactly does that mean? If he's saying that you shouldn't call first or ask him out on a date, I agree.

If you're on a dating site aren't you actively seeking a man or if you tell your friends that you're single again should they invite to gatherings with single men? Can you flirt?

I do not believe women should court men. If you exchange phone numbers, I believe he should take charge when you're trying to establish a relationship.

 

[*CherryPie*]

Stop looking for a man, and just be attractive. Women normally knows how to be attractive, feminine, etc...things that attract men. Let men do what they normally do - hunt...in another word, look for you.

What exactly does that mean? If he's saying that you shouldn't call first or ask him out on a date, I agree.

If you're on a dating site aren't you actively seeking a man or if you tell your friends that you're single again should they invite to gatherings with single men? Can you flirt?

I do not believe women should court men. If you exchange phone numbers, I believe he should take charge when you're trying to establish a relationship.

 

[CaraWalker]

He's giving it because women keep asking him for advice. The women need to stop because I'm tired of Steve.

i sincerely doubt that is true.

 

[*CherryPie*]

Well, I guess since you sincerely doubt it...not just a little, but SINCERELY...it must be the truth.

i sincerely doubt that is true.

 

[CaraWalker]

it's sort of like how since iggy azalea's music is always on the radio, one might assume people must want it and like it and request it.

 

[beingofserenity]

it's sort of like how since iggy azalea's music is always on the radio, one might assume people must want it and like it and request it.

Well...they do.

 

[beingofserenity]

Stop looking for a man, and just be attractive. Women normally knows how to be attractive, feminine, etc...things that attract men. Let men do what they normally do - hunt...in another word, look for you.

I wholeheartedly agree with this whether it came from Steve Harvey or not. Just be attractive lol.

 

[GodsPromises]

What exactly does that mean? If he's saying that you shouldn't call first or ask him out on a date, I agree.

If you're on a dating site aren't you actively seeking a man or if you tell your friends that you're single again should they invite to gatherings with single men? Can you flirt?

I do not believe women should court men. If you exchange phone numbers, I believe he should take charge when you're trying to establish a relationship.

I met my FH on a dating site so in essence i was looking but I din't come across too anxious. What I did was send a wink. Some days I send a few winks to different men and then that's it. I equal it to the smile you give a man at the bar that flirt when you let him know you are interested but you don't buy him a drink or ask him to dance you just smile. If he likes what he sees he will make the next move. It the same for me on dating sites, I sent a wink and left if alone. If they were interested they would wink back or send a message, if they winked back I still didn't do anything because if they were really interested they would send a message. So you are putting yourself out there but you are not doing the work. You are looking pretty but you are not hunting.

 

[tibb1908]

I met my FH on a dating site so in essence i was looking but I din't come across too anxious. What I did was send a wink. Some days I send a few winks to different men and then that's it. I equal it to the smile you give a man at the bar that flirt when you let him know you are interested but you don't buy him a drink or ask him to dance you just smile. If he likes what he sees he will make the next move. It the same for me on dating sites, I sent a wink and left if alone. If they were interested they would wink back or send a message, if they winked back I still didn't do anything because if they were really interested they would send a message. So you are putting yourself out there but you are not doing the work. You are looking pretty but you are not hunting.

I agree that men should do the work!

 

[CaraWalker]

Well...they do.

yep. thats why her album flopped and she had to cancel her tour cause she couldnt sell enough tickets to fill small arenas. youre so right.

 

[Mai Tai]

Stop looking for a man, and just be attractive. Women normally knows how to be attractive, feminine, etc...things that attract men. Let men do what they normally do - hunt...in another word, look for you.

I actually kind of agree with this. Focus on looking good from the inside out. Focus on being the best you mentally and physically. Focus on developing hobbies that will get you off the couch and out the house to where you can meet new people.

 

[beingofserenity]

I actually kind of agree with this. Focus on looking good from the inside out. Focus on being the best you mentally and physically. Focus on developing hobbies that will get you off the couch and out the house to where you can meet new people.

Yep! I love this advice.

 

[DarkJoy]

Why do some (a lot) treat this man like a social philosopher and guru?

Just "sit down, shut up and be pretty," does not agree with me. But whatever.

 

[mstar]

Give this man a medal. What he said is nothing but the truth.

On a deeper level, it's about the male-female energy, and what type of dynamic your relationship will have. Stop playing the role of hunter unless you want a relationship with a feminine-natured dude who doesn't know how to be a man and treat you as a lady. A LOT of the thinking and behavior I see from men today is feminine in nature, and the women don't even realize it anymore. We've come to see these behaviors as normal.

 

[mstar]

Just "sit down, shut up and be pretty," does not agree with me. But whatever.

That's not really what he said. It goes a lot deeper than that.

 

[CaraWalker]

why is it that black men stay hella concerned about what black women are doing wrong but you never hear HALF as much criticism and conversation about what black men are doing?

that last two percent i had in reserve for black men is gone i think. im too done.

 

[*CherryPie*]

Be pretty?? Steve Harvey??

<----------yuck.

Why do some (a lot) treat this man like a social philosopher and guru?

Just "sit down, shut up and be pretty," does not agree with me. But whatever.

 

[DarkJoy]

Fixed that for you ma'am which is probably why this "advice" hit me the wrong way.

why is it that black men stay hella concerned about what black women are doing wrong but you never hear HALF as much criticism and conversation about what black men are NOT doing?

that last two percent i had in reserve for black men is gone i think. im too done.

 

[Layluh]

Whatever. Marjorie hunted his arse.

 

[mstar]

why is it that black men stay hella concerned about what black women are doing wrong but you never hear HALF as much criticism and conversation about what black men are doing?

that last two percent i had in reserve for black men is gone i think. im too done.

Agreed.

 

[Misseyl]

He's right but I hate that he feels that he is a relationship guru all of a sudden.

How true because doesn't he have one divorce under his belt?

 

[Layluh]

How true because doesn't he have one divorce under his belt?

When Marjorie is done with him, it'll be his third I believe

 

[Mai Tai]

Why do some (a lot) treat this man like a social philosopher and guru?

Just "sit down, shut up and be pretty," does not agree with me. But whatever.

Girl...didn't nobody say just "sit down and be pretty." If I recall correctly it was "be attractive" which can mean a MULTITUDE of things like yes, take care of your outer appearance, but also to be interesting, have a life, have some dignity and self-esteem, have a personality and a sense of humor. ALL of these things are attractive to men. Period.