SO has second Facebook account, and Im not invited.

Opalsunset

Opalsunset

New Member
My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year, he is in the Army and so we contact each other my phone, letters and email. For the longest time he didnt have a facebook account, and I did. So I noticed he finally got one, and added him as a friend. So far he never finished setting up his page completely, and only had one other friend who he is not even familiar with, plus me. So everything is going cool, Until I noticed on my facebook page, it keeps telling me to add my boyfriend as my friend! :look:
So I didnt pay any mind to that, seeing he was already my friend on FB.
Then today I just clicked it out of curiosity, because it is always there. Low and behold, the Ninja (he aint even black but he's getting on my nerves.)got a second facebook account, with his (very few) friends and his sister (who is not crazy about me, and has yet to introduce herself to me, she lives in california so I havent ever gotten a chance to speak with her on any occasions, but I know she been trying to hook SO up with her little friends. Anyway.) So now I am wondering, why on earth does he have a second facebook? I see his friends and they are all from the military, so I know they know about me (most of them) then there was a girl or two I noticed on there (Whom I never heard about.) So now Im getting ticked off. Why would he not add me to his more active facebook? I figured it was because of his sister, but now I am not sure what is going on. Everything seemed cool otherwise....Can any ladies give me some direction here? :nono:
 
Let him know that you know about the new account and ask him what's that all about...it's better to ask then to speculate or go around wondering...also his sister can't get him to do anything he doesn't want to.
 
Girl, no, no, no,no,no,no NO! A person should NOT have to make a seperate FB account for his sister. Shady! Ask him what's up with that. Not with an attitude, just say how you feel and you don't feel comfy with that...tell him it looks shady. You might want to ask him, "What if I did the same thing?" , then by his answer you'll really find out just how committed he is to you. THIS is why I don't mess with that crap. Myspace ruined my relationship and through Myspace and a greedy ex was able to cheat on me with a duckfaced and yes I mean DUCKFACED 17 year old. Karma's a bee though, she dumped cuz he was "too routine" LMAO Good luck girl! I hope it's not that serious....
 
disrespectful
shady
warning warning warning
im sure theres some sweet thang in your area that is not far from you right now that could keep you company... i would prefer to be single than deal with that...
 
That's shady. I would just befriend the 2nd account and say something cutesy like "Hey boo, I found ya!" See if he adds you...if not, then I'd start planning to leave. That ish is not cool at all. Lots of men use fbook to mack.
 
Thanks everyone! I felt it wasn't right when I saw it, I am going to try to bring it up to him, maybe even try to send an invite on the second FB page and see what happens...I don't know what's his problem....
 
I just had to add...Dude had nerve because his profile picture on his second 'secret' facebook page is the portrait I took for him (Im a photography student) I was like. you have got to be kidding me.
 
Menina Preta said:
That's shady. I would just befriend the 2nd account and say something cutesy like "Hey boo, I found ya!" See if he adds you...if not, then I'd start planning to leave. That ish is not cool at all. Lots of men use fbook to mack.
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:lachen::lachen: sounds like something a stalker would say
 
Opalsunset said:
Low and behold, the Ninja (he aint even black but he's getting on my nerves.)got a second facebook account, with his (very few) friends and his sister (who is not crazy about me, and has yet to introduce herself to me, she lives in california so I havent ever gotten a chance to speak with her on any occasions, but I know she been trying to hook SO up with her little friends.
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Maybe he/his family is not comfortable with the fact that you are a negra. :look:
 
I know quite a few ppl with 2 pages, but there reasons are:

They attended 2 universities/ had 2 university email accounts. In the beginning you could make a page for every school you went to/had a school email for.

Is this his reason for having 2 pages?
 
I have two accounts..only because my old one was the one from my college days with all of my pictures of me hanging out and partying, and the new one is a more polished, professional one. I don't even really use the old one much anymore. But still, I invited a good majority of my friends to be friends with my new account.

Befriend him and see what he does.
 
Be ready for whatever he does or does not tell you and also know what you will or will not tolerate and respond accordingly.

Remember you are worthy enough to have a mate that will treat you with respect.
 
I think that it could say something about how he feels about you. Normally I :rolleyes: at facebook drama but it seems like he has an account for close friends and family members and an account for other folks. You need to find out why you are with the other folks.
 
chellero said:
I think that it could say something about how he feels about you. Normally I :rolleyes: at facebook drama but it seems like he has an account for close friends and family members and an account for other folks. You need to find out why you are with the other folks.
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I agree with this statement,perhaps this is action is a red flag.
 
If it wasn't for facebook book being all nosy and stuff, you probably wouldn't even have known that he has a separate account going on, which begs the questions what else is he handling on the side? How do you go from 0 account to 2 in less than a year?

I am NOT saying that he is cheating but as women we have that initial gut feeling that something ain't right, what we end up doing is convincing ourselves that we are imagining things and jumping off the handle.

Is he still army based or back into the general population?
If he still in the army well, he is having another life and you are the other other life.
One year is long, but if all you have been doing in writing and calling each other without much physical contact, then it's nothing worth crying over about.
You can always move on and find a better more open civilian man.
 
Just befriend him and go from there. I might still tell him how you feel but don't make a big deal about it.
 
Well, first off you need to ask him what's up with a second page and start preparing for either the best or the worst to come. Not trying to make it worse but facebook, myspace, tagged, etc. are all sites out there where it's possible to pick up women/men and keep in contact on the low. These sites can actually cause more harm in a relationship when it's used for purposes other then keeping up with old buddies and classmates.
 
Very true everyone, thank you!

I never figured race had anything to do with it because he has stood up for us concerning the interracial relationship thing, and It just never seemed to be an issue.
He just never seemed ashamed of me before, so it is kind of weird. His sister has also dated interracially as well. His parents are not really in the picture at the moment, so I know it's not them....Other than that It is really just his friends which some of them know about me....I used to figure he is trying to protect me because some of those guys in his platoon are not really open to interracial dating, but the whole thing has me confused. He is getting ready to deploy in a few weeks and I think I need to see what is going on before then.

I also am not a big fan of FB, I honestly don't go on my own account but that much, but this just struck me as odd..Thank you again ladies for all your help, I am not sure how things will go for us, just because I am having conflict with him and my parents, but I've been hanging in there so time will tell what will be the future of our relationship.
 
Opalsunset said:
I agree with you Xavier, I will just keep it very low profile and stay cool about it. Thank you!
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I have a question for you. Now when he accepts you as a friend do you expect him to update his relationship status to include your name. Just wondering, what your thoughts are on this. I also wonder if his second page says that he is in a relationship.:scratchch
 
zenith said:
If it wasn't for facebook book being all nosy and stuff, you probably wouldn't even have known that he has a separate account going on, which begs the questions what else is he handling on the side? How do you go from 0 account to 2 in less than a year?

I am NOT saying that he is cheating but as women we have that initial gut feeling that something ain't right, what we end up doing is convincing ourselves that we are imagining things and jumping off the handle.

Is he still army based or back into the general population?
If he still in the army well, he is having another life and you are the other other life.
One year is long, but if all you have been doing in writing and calling each other without much physical contact, then it's nothing worth crying over about.
You can always move on and find a better more open civilian man.
Click to expand...


Hi! He's still in the Army, he comes out to see me on his leaves, this last leave he did not come because of some family issues, but he is about to deploy so I dont know how much contact we will have. I havent had any thoughts that he may be cheating, even now Im still not getting any funny feelings like that, but I'm just hoping he has a good explanation for it either way because it does make me wonder, while Im 100% open with him, is he being 100% open with me.
 
Xavier said:
I have a question for you. Now when he accepts you as a friend do you expect him to update his relationship status to include your name. Just wondering, what your thoughts are on this. I also wonder if his second page says that he is in a relationship.:scratchch
Click to expand...

Thats what my best friend asked me too, So far on his page Im on, he hasnt added the relationship status, mine says im in a relationship and i've asked him to put his name in to be linked, which hasn't happened yet...I didnt pay much mind to it since he hasnt finished his page yet :rolleyes: but i am interested in seeing whats going on in that second page of his...
 
Opalsunset said:
Thats what my best friend asked me too, So far on his page Im on, he hasnt added the relationship status, mine says im in a relationship and i've asked him to put his name in to be linked, which hasn't happened yet...I didnt pay much mind to it since he hasnt finished his page yet :rolleyes: but i am interested in seeing whats going on in that second page of his...
Click to expand...


Not to be sneaky but:lachen:...before you request him as a friend why not get a friend(someone who he doesn't know) to request him first and check out the page. :look:
 
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