"men Dont Love Women Like You"

[007PMP]

^^

You’re absolutely right. It’s really an outside looking in from a mans perspective type of book on woman. Dating, married, or single various parts will speak to some and not others. If a woman lacks self-esteem the books applies, for the woman who esteems herself on superficial accomplishments it applies, and one who cannot 100% relate it could be read as preventative. The pitfalls he speaks of is not exclusive to dating, it can be applied to marriage if you look at the principle of it all.

 

[ChasingBliss]

^^

You’re absolutely right. It’s really an outside looking in from a mans perspective type of book on woman. Dating, married, or single various parts will speak to some and not others. If a woman lacks self-esteem the books applies, for the woman who esteems herself on superficial accomplishments it applies, and one who cannot 100% relate it could be read as preventative. The pitfalls he speaks of is not exclusive to dating, it can be applied to marriage if you look at the principle of it all.

Absolutely, because contrary to what women may interpret from this book, men will actually marry a "place holder". But that's a whole other book.

 

[Layluh]

Absolutely, because contrary to what women may interpret from this book, men will actually marry a "place holder". But that's a whole other book.

Yup. The starter wife!

 

[sarumoki]

I read it prior and even as an intentional dater (at the time) I felt like his approach will only get you so far. Idk when I present myself to a prospect, I’m not guarded (to me is baggage). I focus on being myself—which in some ways goes against the “game changer way”.

The value in his book is the first few chapters that focuses on being humble and not priding yourself on your vagina, education, or financial status but on YOU as a person. Basically love yourself (flaws and all) because the person who is attracted to you (as a person) isn’t concerned with the shallow stuff. The user - douchebag identification is common knowledge and the other “letter of the law” “how/what to do” content is #teamtoomuch

If I want to talk a guy, I will call. If I want to go out I will ask. Men know what they want to pursue, keep, and pour into regardless of a woman’s effort.

Then again, I’m a conqueror type of woman...which is a whole other thread topic. Lol

I know you are not asking me ....but I read the book and I am married. I think it's worth the read ESPECIALLY to know the perspective of a man who is willing to share non sugar coated advice. Did I NEED to read it? No. But I certainly enjoyed it and learned a few things..had a few hindsight epiphanies, etc.... I grew up with men like him so his approach did not upset me. As I have said somewhere in this thread, a lot of women either have this "that aint me" type attitude or this "why is he talking about us, what about men" type attitude. Just read it for yourself. I'm positive you wont regret it....even if you wind up being critical of his advice, you will still find it enlightening on some level.

Thank you both ladies. I guess I'll add it to the reading list.

 

[naturalagain2]

Reading the Book of Spartan section and the first half of chapter 4......I cried. Sometimes you think that people will see how nice you are, sacrifice for others before yourself.....well people just don't care about that.

 

[ScorpioBeauty09]

Reading the Book of Spartan section and the first half of chapter 4......I cried. Sometimes you think that people will see how nice you are, sacrifice for others before yourself.....well people just don't care about that.

That was the hardest part for me to read but it matches up with my life experience. He doesn’t believe in karma (I do) but you can’t wait around for it to strike. You’ve got to keep doing you. The liberating part for me is giving myself permission to be ruthless in going after what I want in all areas not just dating. What I’ve been doing for most of my life isn’t working and the definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting a different result.

 

[movingforward13]

Absolutely, because contrary to what women may interpret from this book, men will actually marry a "place holder". But that's a whole other book.

Very true- it happened to me.

 

[BrownSkinQT]

Hey y'all I am reading an excellent book. Before I name the title, please, please, please do not be put off by it. It's an excellent read (if you can tolerate the language. The message is PRICELESS. It's called "Men Dont Love Women Like You" by G.L. Lambert. He's guy from the BGAE site. I am married and reading it just because.... This book is excellent for any women who is going through it in regards to dating and not finding the right guy. He speaks to you to empower yourself and recognize GAME. Please look it up.
I have the audio version...but it's in kindle and paperback too. Those who are familiar with this guy and his blog site know exactly what to expect. But again I implore others to take a look.

eta: I made this a new thread in case some didnt see it in the other one.


I straight up love and appreciate GL. His message will miss many though....

 

[yaya24]

Getting ready for our bookclub tonight to discuss the book.


Had a blast!!!!! 7 of us were in the building.

 

[BrownSkinQT]

I've been following GL for the last 2-3 years and I've started rereading his blogs/articles go a refresher. I've been paying attention to the lyrics in love songs. Earlier today, "Foolish" was playing on the radio and it occured to me Ashanti sounds like a weak *****. Now, just think about how popular this song was back then and how many women took those lyrics to heart......man, do we women have our work cut out for us.

 

[brownb83]

Reading the Book of Spartan section and the first half of chapter 4......I cried. Sometimes you think that people will see how nice you are, sacrifice for others before yourself.....well people just don't care about that.

I just learned this the harrrrrrd wayyyyyyyy. I was both liberating and depressing.

In fact I think most bw are raised this way but that’s another story

 

[nlamr2013]

There’s also a male version called
she ain’t Shit
I’ve just started looking at it the tone seems different. But that’s what I would expect reaching men and women would require different tones.

 

[EagleEyes85]

I just started reading this book again and I'm at the Spartan chapter. I will admit it had me in my feelings. It's like I know he's telling the truth, but I was always taught good things happen to good people. I still believe that to a certain extent, but I know that I must take my destiny into my own hands and stop playing the nice girl all the time.

 

[007PMP]

I just started reading this book again and I'm at the Spartan chapter. I will admit it had me in my feelings. It's like I know he's telling the truth, but I was always taught good things happen to good people. I still believe that to a certain extent, but I know that I must take my destiny into my own hands and stop playing the nice girl all the time.

I think it would be good to self reflect and explore why you find yourself playing the nice girl. Is it related to fear of rejection? Self-esteem? People pleasing?

By starting there (at the root and not the symptom), you might experience a transformation of self that will extend beyond stopping what is inside of you.

If you are authentically a nice person, don’t stop being nice (if you do you’re suppressing who you are). Consider adding wisdom, boundaries, and discernment. There’s nothing wrong with YOU it could be the people who flock to you. Keep in mind — like moths to the light, dark souls flock to radiance. You can still be nice, radiant, and have boundaries and say no or keep them afar.

Karma or whatever—-what I do know is when you garden the seeds you plant dictate the fruit that is produced. So if you plant a good seed, good fruit will be produced. I say this to say don’t stop believing in what you know is right.

For me, that why a portion of the book I don’t like because it’s like he’s writing a prescription that some woman cannot take. As a people we are hurting and we need to focus on healing our insides first before adoring ourselves with step by step processes and categories of who not to be vs who to be—-these are surface and treating symptoms not diseases.

 

[EagleEyes85]

I think it would be good to self reflect and explore why you find yourself playing the nice girl. Is it related to fear of rejection? Self-esteem? People pleasing?

By starting there (at the root and not the symptom), you might experience a transformation of self that will extend beyond stopping what is inside of you.

If you are authentically a nice person, don’t stop being nice (if you do you’re suppressing who you are). Consider adding wisdom, boundaries, and discernment. There’s nothing wrong with YOU it could be the people who flock to you. Keep in mind — like moths to the light, dark souls flock to radiance. You can still be nice, radiant, and have boundaries and say no or keep them afar.

Karma or whatever—-what I do know is when you garden the seeds you plant dictate the fruit that is produced. So if you plant a good seed, good fruit will be produced. I say this to say don’t stop believing in what you know is right.

For me, that why a portion of the book I don’t like because it’s like he’s writing a prescription that some woman cannot take. As a people we are hurting and we need to focus on healing our insides first before adoring ourselves with step by step processes and categories of who not to be vs who to be—-these are surface and treating symptoms not diseases.

Thank you for this. I think I'm just naturally nice and friendly, but like you said sometimes people with darkness just gravitate towards kindness. I'm learning to cut those people off completely and not worry about how it will affect them. I am an empath so when I try and cut off toxic people and they react negatively to it, it affects me. That is something I need to work on within myself, but I don't want to turn cold and manipulative in the process. This is why I had trouble with the art of seduction book. I'm not into playing games or targeting "victims."

This book is a good read, but sometimes it doesn't sit well with me. It's his delivery I believe that kind of makes me cringe, like calling women "basic b####es" I think for me I'll just take what I feel is useful and leave the rest as you've said.

I am curious about this author because I don't know much about him except his old blogs. Has anyone seen a photo of his wife?

 

[007PMP]

Thank you for this. I think I'm just naturally nice and friendly, but like you said sometimes people with darkness just gravitate towards kindness. I'm learning to cut those people off completely and not worry about how it will affect them. I am an empath so when I try and cut off toxic people and they react negatively to it, it affects me. That is something I need to work on within myself, but I don't want to turn cold and manipulative in the process. This is why I had trouble with the art of seduction book. I'm not into playing games or targeting "victims."

This book is a good read, but sometimes it doesn't sit well with me. It's his delivery I believe that kind of makes me cringe, like calling women "basic b####es" I think for me I'll just take what I feel is useful and leave the rest as you've said.

I am curious about this author because I don't know much about him except his old blogs. Has anyone seen a photo of his wife?

So your question got me thinking because yeah it’s helpful to know more about the writer just as much as their books. Here’s what I found and didn’t find. Maybe one our LHCF FBI agents will chime in with more information.

What I was able to find:

1) An article about him working with Ben Stiller. What I found interesting is there is a statement made that Ben may have created lambert. “We’re not sure how Stiller came into contact with Lambert—if we’re being 100 percent honest here, we’re still not completely sure he didn’t just invent him, out of a desire to create a new candidate for worst person in the world—but apparently something about his methods spoke to the Zoolander star.”
https://www.google.com/amp/s/news.a...th-the-author-of-ho-tactics-on-1798247240/amp

2) Lambert has a website called “Black girls are easy”. Interesting but I’m not going to invest too much time in figuring out why the website is named such. It is weird though. http://blackgirlsareeasy.com/

3) A what could be a picture of him? Again I can write a couple books and hire an actor to play me as the writer. If you haven’t came to my home you wouldn’t know who I was really. http://www.blogtalkradio.com/modeon...ll-casual-sex-lover-to-a-mans-1-woman-or-wife

What I couldn’t find:

1) photo ops of Lambert with or without a man or woman
2) a comprehensive bio — I can’t find anything close to a paragraph on him.
3) a wiki page

 

[caribeandiva]

What I couldn’t find:

1) photo ops of Lambert with or without a man or woman
2) a comprehensive bio — I can’t find anything close to a paragraph on him.
3) a wiki page

I found that very odd too. I’m all for privacy and all but I find it suspicious af that there’s no photos of him, his wife and their newborn daughter.

 

[yaya24]

I'm still all in support of this book.

I'm not on Twitter, but he also has a twitter. I glanced through, and his use of B-I-T-C-H in some of his advice, gives me gay male friend vibes. Could just be me but I after reading his twitter... He's either gay or its a woman behind the scene (possibly his wife since I also gathered that he is married) using his face as the Author.

EDITED TO ADD.. Just listened to the blogtalk post posted above. He sounds like he is in fact the author. The radio show is from 2013 or 2014.
Sounds heterosexual not gay.


https://twitter.com/8plus9?lang=en

 

[nlamr2013]

So your question got me thinking because yeah it’s helpful to know more about the writer just as much as their books. Here’s what I found and didn’t find. Maybe one our LHCF FBI agents will chime in with more information.

What I was able to find:

1) An article about him working with Ben Stiller. What I found interesting is there is a statement made that Ben may have created lambert. “We’re not sure how Stiller came into contact with Lambert—if we’re being 100 percent honest here, we’re still not completely sure he didn’t just invent him, out of a desire to create a new candidate for worst person in the world—but apparently something about his methods spoke to the Zoolander star.”
https://www.google.com/amp/s/news.a...th-the-author-of-ho-tactics-on-1798247240/amp

2) Lambert has a website called “Black girls are easy”. Interesting but I’m not going to invest too much time in figuring out why the website is named such. It is weird though. http://blackgirlsareeasy.com/

3) A what could be a picture of him? Again I can write a couple books and hire an actor to play me as the writer. If you haven’t came to my home you wouldn’t know who I was really. http://www.blogtalkradio.com/modeon...ll-casual-sex-lover-to-a-mans-1-woman-or-wife

What I couldn’t find:

1) photo ops of Lambert with or without a man or woman
2) a comprehensive bio — I can’t find anything close to a paragraph on him.
3) a wiki page

Here is his personal Twitter. He looks like a f-boy lol but his words have always been real talk.
https://mobile.twitter.com/8plus9

I remember him posting the baby once I thought but maybe not
Let me see if I find it

I wanna say his full name is Gary Lamont lambert but don’t quote me on that middle name I may have made it up in my head lol

 

[caribeandiva]

Has he actually done any interviews and such? I’m really curious now. I still like his book and his blog though

 

[007PMP]

I'm still all in support of this book.

I'm not on Twitter, but he also has a twitter. I glanced through, and his use of B-I-T-C-H in some of his advice, gives me gay male friend vibes. Could just be me but I after reading his twitter... He's either gay or its a woman behind the scene (possibly his wife since I also gathered that he is married) using his face as the Author.

EDITED TO ADD.. Just listened to the blogtalk post posted above. He sounds like he is in fact the author. The radio show is from 2013 or 2014.
Sounds heterosexual not gay.


https://twitter.com/8plus9?lang=en

If he is in fact gay then I honestly would feel some kind of way about his advise. (That’s just me though)

 

[MzLady78]

I can’t find it anymore, but he had a tweet that listed watching “Love Actually” as a tradition.

 

[007PMP]

I can’t find it anymore, but he had a tweet that listed watching “Love Actually” as a tradition.

I don’t know one straight black man who on their own merits knows about this movie. But then again, he’s a writer so maybe we’ll make him an exception to the rule.

 

[nlamr2013]

I found that very odd too. I’m all for privacy and all but I find it suspicious af that there’s no photos of him, his wife and their newborn daughter.

He has done interviews I’ve never heard them but I would assume he speaks mostly about the advice vs himself.

Here is a pic of him plus the wife(this was on a public ig)

 

[007PMP]

He has done interviews I’ve never heard them but I would assume he speaks mostly about the advice vs himself.

Here is a pic of him plus the wife(this was on a public ig)

I wonder if he’s an alpha or beta male. She looks like she could be an alpha female.

 

[caribeandiva]

He has done interviews I’ve never heard them but I would assume he speaks mostly about the advice vs himself.

Here is a pic of him plus the wife(this was on a public ig)

Thank you!!

 

[Gin&Tonic]

I don’t know one straight black man who on their own merits knows about this movie. But then again, he’s a writer so maybe we’ll make him an exception to the rule.

If he is in close proximity to a woman like me, he has been forced to watch and to discuss Love Actually.

 

[007PMP]

If he is in close proximity to a woman like me, he has been forced to watch and to discuss Love Actually.

What’s the reason for making him watch it? You know men do it but have zero interest in stuff like that, which means very little is retained and it’s a waste of your/his time. Just ask them to be really honest and see what they say. (Compliance does not beget effectiveness).

 

[Gin&Tonic]

What’s the reason for making him watch it? You know men do it but have zero interest in stuff like that, which means very little is retained and it’s a waste of your/his time. Just ask them to be really honest and see what they say. (Compliance does not beget effectiveness).

What are you talking about-a waste of time? If I want to do something that I enjoy its not a waste of my mans time. It not all about what the man wants, this a just another hoop he needs to jump through.

I actually don't make them watch. I invite them to watch a movie with me and tell them how much I love this one. Do you think I care what they are interested in? I'm not trying to change them any more than they are trying to change me when they want me to watch football. They had better participate in my movie with a smile just like I deal with their sports. They don't have to retain anything, but they usually do.

They act like they love it- just like Champagne, buying me flowers, going the the ballet, scented candles and paying my bills.

They have interest because they are interested in me. My ex called this Xmas to say that Love actually was on and he was thinking of me.

Obviously my men aren't the only men who are moved by the movie, I made the post in response the the author saying that the movie is a tradition for him.

 

[007PMP]

What are you talking about-a waste of time? If I want to do something that I enjoy its not a waste of my mans time. It not all about what the man wants, this a just another hoop he needs to jump through.

I actually don't make them watch. I invite them to watch a movie with me and tell them how much I love this one. Do you think I care what they are interested in? I'm not trying to change them any more than they are trying to change me when they want me to watch football. They had better participate in my movie with a smile just like I deal with their sports. They don't have to retain anything, but they usually do.

They act like they love it- just like Champagne, buying me flowers, going the the ballet, scented candles and paying my bills.

They have interest because they are interested in me. My ex called this Xmas to say that Love actually was on and he was thinking of me.

Obviously my men aren't the only men who are moved by the movie, I made the post in response the the author saying that the movie is a tradition for him.

My goal was not to generate an aggressive/defensive response from you. Just so you know my intentions. My point was proven exactly by your response: Men don’t enjoy watching movies like Love Actually but you said you make him. In that case I guess he’s watching it to appease/comply and although you forced someone to watch something important to you it doesn’t mean he’s enjoying it or getting what you get out of the movie. Again, compliance doesn’t beget effectiveness.

Acting is not genuine and merely obligatory so again....what’s the point? I thought the goal was to be with someone who genuinely wants to pay your bills, buy you flowers, etc.

Now we’re off topic but I appreciate your response and would appreciate even more if you didn’t take my post as an attack.