Ladies is it/was really that hard to find a good man?!
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MochaEyeCandy
New Member
If you go to the club 3 nights a week without fail in hopes of meeting your life partner, then yes it's damn near impossible.
If you try other places like the library, home depot, charity work, volunteering, and/or sporting events it's much easier.
I think there's a lack of decent people, period. Cause for ever dog, there are 2 chicks who'll fight to sleep with him knowing he's "taken". There seems to be an excess of shady folks everywhere.
If you try other places like the library, home depot, charity work, volunteering, and/or sporting events it's much easier.
I think there's a lack of decent people, period. Cause for ever dog, there are 2 chicks who'll fight to sleep with him knowing he's "taken". There seems to be an excess of shady folks everywhere.
lexi84
Well-Known Member
After being single for 3+ years and seeing what slim pickings black women have, I was still able to find my good man.
I think the problem is that there are ALOT of good men out there, but some of us would rather have a 'challenge'. Its stupid, but true. This was my problem for a while and was something I had to grow out of. Once I learned to love myself, I was able to love someone who deserved me.
I think the problem is that there are ALOT of good men out there, but some of us would rather have a 'challenge'. Its stupid, but true. This was my problem for a while and was something I had to grow out of. Once I learned to love myself, I was able to love someone who deserved me.
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drasgrl
Well-Known Member
No I've never had a problem. If you go out with the mindset that all men are no good then what do you expect will happen? I've never had that mindset. Sure I've run across an a$$ or two but it happens. No one is perfect but I know that there are more good men than not and so far that's what I've gotten.
Halana Malie
Sippin’ bubbly feeling lovely
I'll have to get back to you on this. Since I dumped that low life scum recently.
Actually I don't think it's hard to find a good man. However, I do know that the right one will come along when we least expect it. When we're not even looking.
Actually I don't think it's hard to find a good man. However, I do know that the right one will come along when we least expect it. When we're not even looking.
Likeyouneverseenme
New Member
There are a lot of great men out there. I found mine and I wasn't even looking.
It will come to you when you're ready and under the right circumstances.
It will come to you when you're ready and under the right circumstances.
P
Paradox
Guest
there are much more black women than black men in general.
Evolving78
Well-Known Member
it is hard to find a good man, when you are kinda messed up yourself (generally speaking)
princessnad
New Member
I don't think it is hard to find a good man but you are going against the odds to find a man with the right fit. There are only a few soulmates for you among billions of people in the world at any given time so the odds are like 3 in 3 billion.
What works for me wont work for you. I think people should realize that they are only going to end up with one person in the end so don't get discouraged when they find people who were made for someone else. Just keep it moving, you will find him.
What works for me wont work for you. I think people should realize that they are only going to end up with one person in the end so don't get discouraged when they find people who were made for someone else. Just keep it moving, you will find him.
FlowerHair
Reclaiming my time
It's not hard, but you have to be open and ready for him.
When I was ready, he found me on my way home from work one day
When I was ready, he found me on my way home from work one day
DayStar
Well-Known Member
i dont believe this...if you sit in your room 5 out of 7 days he aint going to find you...you have to make yourself available....but not desperate
I found a good man......so far so good...am i in love? No...but he wasnt what i expected....i was very unrealsitic with my expectations....now other qualities are more important...such as great work ethic/motivation ...financially alright/good and he can be average looking....not UGLY
...ill make up for cuteness 
i think women think unrealistically sometimes and thats what makes things difficult..
I found a good man......so far so good...am i in love? No...but he wasnt what i expected....i was very unrealsitic with my expectations....now other qualities are more important...such as great work ethic/motivation ...financially alright/good and he can be average looking....not UGLY
...ill make up for cuteness i think women think unrealistically sometimes and thats what makes things difficult..
Well said.
Highly Favored8
Well-Known Member
Yes, So true I agree.
Yes, they are good men it is are you prepared yourself and have yourself together when you meet him.
The people complaining can't find a good man that meets their standards.
There definately are good men out there, but just because they are "good" doesn't mean that you are compatible with them relationship-wise or physically attracted to them (or vice versa).
Britt
Well-Known Member
I'm currently single and would like to start dating soon. Although my previous relationship was not a good one, I'm not one of those women who become scorned and think all men are bad. I've always thought that there are good men out there, but I def. do agree but the problem is whether or not you are attracted to them in a romantic way to begin a relationship. This is what I find a little unnerving, b/c while I'm sure there are plenty of decent men out there, the odds of finding that chemistry might be a little more difficult.
Spongie Bloom
New Member
i dont think good men are hard to find, i think some women meet a guy and are hell bent in making him the guy they want him to be then complain about it when he doesnt change, most guys (except for two) ive dated were good men and i didnt need to do anything special to find them, i met them thru a friend, at the bus stop, at a high school show,in my neighbourhood etc
even the guys im not really that interested in that are asking me out are in essence good men i have the mindset that most men are good men (my dad and brothers are) so it is easy to recognise the ones that arent worth my time...most of them know not to approach me anyway
even the guys im not really that interested in that are asking me out are in essence good men i have the mindset that most men are good men (my dad and brothers are) so it is easy to recognise the ones that arent worth my time...most of them know not to approach me anyway
Not to mention, what's right in the long run and what's right for right now are two totally different things and folks can't seem to keep it straight. Not to speak in cliches, but Mr. Right Now is 9 times out of 10 NOT the guy you want to try and build something with, but at the club/bar/basketball game, sitting there with his boys, he sure does look good.
MizAvalon
Well-Known Member
I wouldn't say it's all that hard because I meet good men all the time. Now, whether or not I am interested in and/or want to marry these men is another tale.
For instance, I don't date men with kids. Right there, that cancels out a lot of men in my age group. On the other hand though, I date all ethnicities and nationalities so maybe that evens things out.
For instance, I don't date men with kids. Right there, that cancels out a lot of men in my age group. On the other hand though, I date all ethnicities and nationalities so maybe that evens things out.
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drasgrl
Well-Known Member
I don't think it is hard to find a good man but you are going against the odds to find a man with the right fit. There are only a few soulmates for you among billions of people in the world at any given time so the odds are like 3 in 3 billion.
What works for me wont work for you. I think people should realize that they are only going to end up with one person in the end so don't get discouraged when they find people who were made for someone else. Just keep it moving, you will find him.
I don't think that way. Out of the billions of people on earth there are tons of "soulmates" out there. People who match you perfectly. The trick is just finding one. Your soulmate could be in Russia, France, New Guinea but most of the time we hardly leave the 50 mile radius of our home. The more people you meet the more connections you make and the easier it may be to find.
MizAvalon
Well-Known Member
Exactly. Most women are only thinking about the few dozen men that they come across in their city.
There are millions of men worldwide.
bermudabeauty
New Member
I have met a lot of good guys. I haven't found my true love yet, the one meant for me to marry, but there are alot of good guys as well as losers out there.
MD_Lady
Well-Known Member
Your ENTIRE post is AWESOME!!!
MD_Lady
Well-Known Member
You are on POINT with this!!
Lebiya
Well-Known Member
I don’t think it’s easy or hard. It’s about being at the right place at the right time. My cousin met her hubby in a cemetery, he was there visiting his best friend who died, she was there at her co-worker's funeral ceremony. He caught a glimpse of her in the crowd and cowardly went over after service to give condolences. The Rest is History.
Always try to look your best - even to check the mail. Have an open mind.
The mistake a lot of people make is thinking that you can only meet “the one” in a special place, or event, when in fact he could be anywhere- even in the parking lot fixing his car wheel.
Always try to look your best - even to check the mail. Have an open mind.
The mistake a lot of people make is thinking that you can only meet “the one” in a special place, or event, when in fact he could be anywhere- even in the parking lot fixing his car wheel.
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