He is in Prison....

[Qualitee]

Well i guess to update everyone earlier this evening he called me and I KNOW i wasnt supposed to accept the call but anger bult up in me after thinking all night. Im actually not mad at him im mad at myself terribly angry at myself. How can someone with so much common sense or so i thought end up in this predicament? But anyway i answered and he seemed like he was fishing for info. He kept asking any news? anything new? whats going on with you? I simply told him nope nothing new same ol same ol. he still kept pushing the issue. unless he has super powers i dont know how he would know. I mean i think i was being pretty brief with the convo.I didnt tell him anything not sure if i was supposed to but I decided to have an abortion. Not saying that im not mature enough to have this baby. I believe i am capable but i recently lost my dad from cancer and i am still deeply mourning much less bringing a child into the world with no father. I dont know i just dont think my child deserves that. There are wonderful single mothers out there but i dont think i can handle that. My dad must be shaking his head right now his baby daughter he thought would be make him proud unlike the others has joined them

I told you! He did it on purpose to catch you. He knew what he did But I hope everything turns out ok

 

[awhyley]

Glad you came back. For a minute there, I thought we'd scared you off.

Well i guess to update everyone earlier this evening he called me and I KNOW i wasnt supposed to accept the call but anger bult up in me after thinking all night. Im actually not mad at him im mad at myself terribly angry at myself. How can someone with so much common sense or so i thought end up in this predicament?

It happens, even to the best of us hon. Seriously, you're gonna have to wean these phone calls down to zero, because if you keep taking his calls now, he's going to turn it into a habit. Chane your number if you have to. Yeah, he's fishing for info. He wants to know where your head is at. If anything, I would make a list of the things that I would want him to know and tell him that this is his last call to you. (eta: but that's just my opinion)

 

[ladysaraii]

Well i guess to update everyone earlier this evening he called me and I KNOW i wasnt supposed to accept the call but anger bult up in me after thinking all night. Im actually not mad at him im mad at myself terribly angry at myself. How can someone with so much common sense or so i thought end up in this predicament? But anyway i answered and he seemed like he was fishing for info. He kept asking any news? anything new? whats going on with you? I simply told him nope nothing new same ol same ol. he still kept pushing the issue. unless he has super powers i dont know how he would know. I mean i think i was being pretty brief with the convo.I didnt tell him anything not sure if i was supposed to but I decided to have an abortion. Not saying that im not mature enough to have this baby. I believe i am capable but i recently lost my dad from cancer and i am still deeply mourning much less bringing a child into the world with no father. I dont know i just dont think my child deserves that. There are wonderful single mothers out there but i dont think i can handle that. My dad must be shaking his head right now his baby daughter he thought would be make him proud unlike the others has joined them

Thanks for updating us. OP, I sincerely wish you the best, so please go forth from this and don't look back at this man. Go forward and be your best so that you can have a life full of happiness and not regrets.

 

[MzV1991]

Are you sure about this too?

From the naivety of her OP, I'm going to assume she didn't get tested either. OP please go take a STI test.

This thread sounds so unreal; I don't even know what to say. Goodluck.

Oh that was the first thing i did after fniding out i was pregnant

 

[Thiends]

I have read every single post and geesh yall ladies got me tearing up. But its okay i know its just tough love and i appreciate it. Thank you....

Hey, chin up now, ok? I know my post must have been hard to read, but you must always be real with yourself about your contribution to any bad situation in which you find yourself. The "it wasn't my fault" thought is a seductive one, but you have to keep it 100 with yourself at all times. I have found that in being harder on myself than virtually anyone else is, I leave as little room as possible for bad luck to take a hand. You're not the first woman to have unprotected sex. Many women do every day and get away pregnancy-free. What you have to remember, however, is that you never want to leave your entire future to chance. We all make mistakes (heaven knows that I stand on God's grace), but you have to make sure that, to the degree possible, you keep your hands on the steering wheel at all times.

You do this by being abstinent or having only protected sex; by not being late for work even though all of your coworkers are (when the boss cracks down and people start ratting each other out, you'll have nothing to fear); by not even dating the man who isn't living his life according to the standard you set for yourself - don't even go there with him; by eating as healthily as you can, exercising, and getting regular check-ups; by not smoking weed over at ReRe 'nem's place even though everyone else does (the night you go might be the night a neighbor calls the cops and everyone gets apprehended - don't catch a case over stupidity!); by surrounding yourself with like-minded people who can give you good advice, instead of always having to ignore the haters you chose to have in your life etc. Life will always take a hand regardless of our best-laid plans, but even in the midst of life's storms, it is very comforting to be able to say to yourself: I did all I could and now I just have to leave the rest to God.

Take this situation as a wake-up call to be very careful going forward. I think God did you such a favor when he had this man taken away from you by force and God has a plan for your life. Really think about both of your options so that you can tell yourself in the future that you made the best choice you could under the circumstance. Regardless of what you decide, don't let us hear of you taking up with any more thugs, ok?

Edit: Regarding talking to your parents - you know them better than we do. Talk to them only if they will not add to the stress of this situation or hold this against you and keep reminding you years after you have moved on. Sometimes it's best to keep things to ourselves that way others around us don't continue to judge us by our mistakes once we have learned from them. Other times, it is good to reach out for support and give others a chance to love us. Just think carefully about this. I don't think that telling one's parents or not telling one's parents is automatically a right answer.

 

[MzV1991]

Oh cut that emotionally manipulative bullshyt out. You don't know what the hell her child would say so take your behind back to troll academy. Her child could just as easily be saying:

"Negress, the world is a hateful place and no one is more hated than yet another fatherless, illegitimate black child of yet another ignorant, unwed, dirt-poor black teenager. Spare me the suffering caused by your poor decision-making and let me stay unborn so that someone who deserves me can have me."

Let us look around us in the world as it is today and ask ourselves if we're not all tired of stupid black girls making stupid decisions over stupid negros. I wouldn't be surprised if the unborn feel the same way too. I can't even feel sympathy for OP. If he got 35 years in prison, then that means this wasn't his first offense. Like a fool, you took up with a criminal and kept dating him as he offended repeatedly. You kept seeing him through his arrests and trials, and that tells me that you must be like him because water finds its own level. You then let him impregnate you through unprotected sex -- and I'm not buying your little story about not knowing he went condomless -- and want to roll up here and find sympathy without taking a bit of responsibility? This all just happened to you while you were walking down the street on the way to the library, huh? I don't feel sorry for you and you just have to lay in your bed as you made it.

Edit: Really, I have to think about voting Republican because we can't keep rewarding women who chase after and throw their legs open for garbage.

......wow i found this pretty harsh. I never wanted sympathy i think you confused that with me asking for some help. I am black adopted into a mostly indian family i cant go to my "mother" she is the one behind choosing this guy for me. I mean i take full responsibilty over and over again ive said i made such a stupid mistake there is alot of things i should of and wished i would of done differently but thats not where im at right now. I got to deal with right now. With this child in my stomach the point of making this thread is to make a decidion for right now and my future which i already did

 

[*5+5]

I'm too emotional to read all the posts in this thread with abortion, a black man committing a serious crime, major prison time, dreams deferred being wrapped up into one thread.

So I'll just say all the best to your OP and I hope that you make the best decisions that 'you' are able to live with and that you land on your feet, successful and happy!

 

[MzV1991]

just to throw it out there also.....the main reason i deemed it safe to put myself out there like this to you ladies is because my membership on here ends in April and i didnt plan on re suscribing. Everyone have different views and im starting to think it did more damage asking for help i should of just kept it to myself because im becoming overwhelmed