Baby Mama DRAMA

[The Girl]

I double co sign with you and CBC...I have dealt with a similiar situation and thinking you are not gonna have to deal with kids isnt really a reality and can cause resentment and may possibly make your bf reconsider the marriage.

I quad co sign (adding SR in the mix) and say really really think if it was you in her place. Maybe not psychotic but if you had children with him. Trust me there is a huge group of women here who thought; "He won't do me and mine that way". Just food for thought, not coming down on you. We have just been there.((((((((((((BIG HUG))))))))))))

 

[The Girl]

MMhmmm...if she was good enough to lay up with unprotected, call the woman and say "Hello Woman. How are you? How was your day? How are my boys?"

ya'll got me feeling hot on this Friday morning. I cant STAND a negro who likes to switch it up talkin about "I'll never speak to or see her again". Thats just some real ignant ****

SUMMMMMMMERRRRRRRRRR!!!! Girl, I am sitting here....at the office....literally about to jump up SCREAMING! You wanna talk about WORKED UP!?!?!?! THANK YOU!!!!!!!

Hello I am here making post after post after post. Not to be funky or anything but if its a one night stand how did she find his info for child support/ paternity?

 

[The Girl]

Exactly. He was thinking the police report would scare some sense into her, but apparently not. He told me last night that he does not even think that hte protection order will do anything to her. This girl is not scared of anything I tell you! He is mainly just doing this so that he will at least have some kind of court record of her behavior so when he goes to family court he can show her behavior and she cannot claim that she is the victim.

Ok how did they meet in the first place? Sorry for the tone but this is crazy and I don't want my lil sister caught in this mess any longer than neccessary.

 

[The Girl]

When you started this thread, I knew there was more to this story because I immediately thought that your boyfriend had more than a "one night stand" with this girl for her to get so crazy.

Did your boyfriend promise her anything like marriage? Did he tell her that he loved her? Was she a virgin? These things can make a woman crazy regardless of culture.

Culture may be playing a big part in her behavior. SHe comes from a culture where the men rule, where the men own the women. She may look upon as tainted goods by her own because she had children and was not married. Her black children may make things worst for her.

Exactly that may be why it will never end...ladies with sons plaese take notes. Get your speech ready to avoid this type of drama. Moms with lil ladies, same thing.

 

[january noir]

I think at some point in the future the two parents involved need to sit down with with a professional mediator if possible and get some resolution to this problem for the children's sake. Family courts usually provide this service. They sound as if they need counseling to cope with this situation. I really hope he is able to play an active role in his children's life because as they get older they will not entertain the excuse that their father never spent time with them because he couldn't get along with their mother. Even if it is true.They will just feel hat he didn't care enough to fight for them.

Sounds like a good idea, but after reading this whole thread, I don't think Babys' Mama going to coorperate with mediator or counselor either. She hasn't been compliant in anything. This woman is whack!
I feel for your situation Ashmack .

I bet your BF kicks himself EVERYDAY for that lapse in judgement; the day he had unprotected sex with that woman. WTH was he thinking?

 

[Priss Pot]

ITA with you ladies. I"m not saying that's right AT ALL. I think it's horrible. So does my bf who has spent time talking to pro bono attorneys in order to figure out his options. He does not live in he same city, he lives over 6 hours away. The kids were actually born in a different city, which now has jurisdiction over the case, and that city is 8 hours away. When the two of them got pregnant, he was already enrolled full time in school and came back to school not knowing that she was even having kids. I know it's easy to put this story into a cookie cuter case of him not wanting to see his kids, but all I can say is that my bf and I have spent 2 weekends together in over a year of being together. WHy is that? He has to work full time to pay the child support. He is taking care of that responsibility. If he does get the weekend off he is making a drive down there to see the kids. I have lost count how many times he has driven to see the kids and she will not allow him to see them. He is not able to go to court until after he graduates and gets a job so that he can afford to go and fight for his kids. I actually don't even know if he can afford the gas money at this point to drive the 8 hours it takes to get to the court. This does not even include the time and money it takes to prepare for court, but oh well.

It's not an excuse, it's really reasons. I have so many examples it's crazy. I guess that's not coming across and that's ok too. Everyone is entitled to believe what they want to believe.

While I don't agree with the "non-step mommying" solution, I can't help but to understand your distress with the other situation.

There are a bunch of crazy women out there who can get hooked on a man's penis skills in one night, and start stalking him the next day if he doesn't call. C'mon now, we've all heard stories about that happening.

No one can make the mother let your SO see his kids. I'm a full-time student, and I know that it takes up a bunch of time. Being 6-8 hours away, that's a lot. Scrapping up money to go see the kids, only to be let down, is horrible. So I don't see why women on here are making it seem like your SO isn't trying. Maybe they don't know what it's like to be a broke college student; so all they can do is make assumptions when they don't know everyone's situation. Maybe they are the same type of "baby mama" like what your SO is dealing with, which is why they keep sympathizing with her. I don't understand. It seems that the mother is being very childish and NOT realizing that she has 2 kids that need to come first, NOT her needs (getting her fix of hearing your SO's voice everyday and knowing what he had for dinner). That's pure BS.

I wish you the best of luck in this situation. Your SO just needs to make a bunch of phone calls or something. Go visit with a lawyer in the hometown and state his case. While your SO is back in school, the lawyer could stand for him in court (possibly, if they allow it there). Take care, Ash.

 

[january noir]

While I don't agree with the "non-step mommying" solution, I can't help but to understand your distress with the other situation.

There are a bunch of crazy women out there who can get hooked on a man's penis skills in one night, and start stalking him the next day if he doesn't call. C'mon now, we've all heard stories about that happening.

No one can make the mother let your SO see his kids. I'm a full-time student, and I know that it takes up a bunch of time. Being 6-8 hours away, that's a lot. Scrapping up money to go see the kids, only to be let down, is horrible. So I don't see why women on here are making it seem like your SO isn't trying. Maybe they don't know what it's like to be a broke college student; so all they can do is make assumptions when they don't know everyone's situation. Maybe they are the same type of "baby mama" like what your SO is dealing with, which is why they keep sympathizing with her. I don't understand. It seems that the mother is being very childish and NOT realizing that she has 2 kids that need to come first, NOT her needs (getting her fix of hearing your SO's voice everyday and knowing what he had for dinner). That's pure BS.

I wish you the best of luck in this situation. Your SO just needs to make a bunch of phone calls or something. Go visit with a lawyer in the hometown and state his case. While your SO is back in school, the lawyer could stand for him in court (possibly, if they allow it there). Take care, Ash.

I was wondering this too since Ashmak stated MANY times throughout her numerous posts what her BF's situation was.

I was sitting here reading and thinking, "is it just me, or are people really missing that point?" erplexed

The advice about the lawyer sounds like a good idea to me.

 

[StrawberryQueen]

ITA!!!!!!!!!! Somebody is not telling the whole story here! A girl who barely knows a guy...even if she has kids with him from a one-night stand...would NOT be demanding that he call her to see how her day was! HELLO! That should be a red flag right there that he is not telling the entire story!

And, every post I've read about how he is responding has made me cringe...he made these babies and now it's an inconvenience? Pay his child support and just stay out of the picture? That's horrible for the boys. Not admirable at all.

Exactly! Children deserve people who are better than this. Regardless of the circumstances of which they were conviced-it doesn't matter. She didn't rape him, he laid down with her. And now the kids are here and need to be cared for, which goes BEYOND financial. It delves into emotional, social and physical support. And it seems like you and your bf/so aren't prepared to do that at all.

Trust me, my bf and I have already discussed these possibilities. He knows how I feel about those kids. I will never be a step mom. I will just be their dad's wife. We know how we will handle the situation if something does happen to her. Trust me, this has been discussed more than anything. Our solutions does not require me to care for kids that are not mine. I do feel sorry for the kids, but it's not my responsibility to make sure that their parents are making the best decisions for them. That is up to my bf and her. That has nothing to do with me.

If you are not prepared to care for these children and be a STEP MOTHER then you shouldn't be involved with this man or the children. How can you say you're not going to care for these children when the are the fleh of the man you want to marry? And FYI if you marry him, then WILL become your responsibility. You need to reevaulate your life before you go further down this road.

She even admits they were not dating and that they only slept together that one time. It's not just his story.

AND??? What does that have to do with anything? The kids are here now and need a DADDY now, not just a father. If she won't let him see the kids, and he's scheduled to-can't he call the police on her? And he hasn't gone to court over this yet? SMDH, I will pray for these kids, this is a messy situation

 

[SouthernJewel]

OKAY YOU OUTTA MY HEAD . . . RIGHT NOW. . . JUST GO ON

I was thinking this but . . . I don't play that crap. He crazy, she crazy. . . naw I can show you crazy for real. And when I finish with her *** trust and believe she would send up smoke signals before she'd pick up the phone to call him or send a damn text message. She'd have no feeling in her fingers cuz I'd break her d^mn arm at the elbow. I don't play the victim for nobody.

****high five****

 

[Priss Pot]

I was wondering this too since Ashmak stated MANY times throughout her numerous posts what her BF's situation was.

I was sitting here reading and thinking, "is it just me, or are people really missing that point?" erplexed

The advice about the lawyer sounds like a good idea to me.

My Dad did that for me my sophomore year of college. I got a speeding ticket, and the court date was set on a date (in the middle of the week, of course) that I would be in school and couldn't come home. He's not a lawyer, but the courts allowed him to stand in for me and speak for me. It all worked out fine.

ETA: We all know that court dates are set on weekdays, NOT weekends. I don't see how the women on here expect Ashmack's SO to come home numerous times during the week, and miss out on class. I can understand sacrificing a class or two, but let's be forreal. College isn't free for most people. You're paying for those hours. If I were him, I wouldn't fail for ANYBODY. I would sacrifice class on a friday to go see a lawyer so that he could take my case for me while I'm away at school. Classes are nothing to just take lightly. No one on here knows his workload. I don't know if the other ladies cared about their grades while in college, but I don't blame Ashmack's SO for caring about his. He needs to get on his lawyer grind fast, and talk to his teachers so that they can understand if he misses a class in order to go talk to a lawyer.

 

[spelmanlocks]

I don't advocate him failing because he's going to need a good job to continue providing support, but his kids are not just ANYBODY. I am in grad school and work full time so I know it can be difficult with scheduling time but sometimes you just have to do what you have to do. Maybe he can try to pursue a resolution during the summer when his course load may be lighter.

Or It might be that he'll have to deal with this drama until he finishes school and can make time to fight for custody if she hasn't straightened up. Perhaps a judge will order them both into family counseling as well, which would be very helpful.

Without all of the background details (is he really telling the truth about their relationship, is he possibly still feeding her stories, etc) on this story though its impossible to provide any real advice. I do agree with the other ladies he may not be being upfront about his supposed one night stands relationship. The baby mama may also have reasons for not being upfront about it either.

 

[The Girl]

My Dad did that for me my sophomore year of college. I got a speeding ticket, and the court date was set on a date (in the middle of the week, of course) that I would be in school and couldn't come home. He's not a lawyer, but the courts allowed him to stand in for me and speak for me. It all worked out fine.

ETA: We all know that court dates are set on weekdays, NOT weekends. I don't see how the women on here expect Ashmack's SO to come home numerous times during the week, and miss out on class. I can understand sacrificing a class or two, but let's be forreal. College isn't free for most people. You're paying for those hours. If I were him, I wouldn't fail for ANYBODY. I would sacrifice class on a friday to go see a lawyer so that he could take my case for me while I'm away at school. Classes are nothing to just take lightly. No one on here knows his workload. I don't know if the other ladies cared about their grades while in college, but I don't blame Ashmack's SO for caring about his. He needs to get on his lawyer grind fast, and talk to his teachers so that they can understand if he misses a class in order to go talk to a lawyer.

Ok I understand the whole class attendance thing. However, if missing one or two classes a semester is gonna make him fail, college may not be for him...just saying. (The family court scheduling is not as swift as one would hope) Now, about the babies and missing: its his babies, what choice does he have? If it were yours would you miss class and find out about your babies or stay in class and hope everything turns out fine? I for one understand school is not easy or free but I also understand that your children trump a lot of things in life.

 

[MissYocairis]

Ok I understand the whole class attendance thing. However, if missing one or two classes a semester is gonna make him fail, college may not be for him...just saying. (The family court scheduling is not as swift as one would hope) Now, about the babies and missing: its his babies, what choice does he have? If it were yours would you miss class and find out about your babies or stay in class and hope everything turns out fine? I for one understand school is not easy or free but I also understand that your children trump a lot of things in life.

AGREED. Time for daddy to grow up...and welcome to the real world.

 

[14got]

ITA!!!!!!!!!! Somebody is not telling the whole story here! A girl who barely knows a guy...even if she has kids with him from a one-night stand...would NOT be demanding that he call her to see how her day was! HELLO! That should be a red flag right there that he is not telling the entire story!

And, every post I've read about how he is responding has made me cringe...he made these babies and now it's an inconvenience? Pay his child support and just stay out of the picture? That's horrible for the boys. Not admirable at all.

O-kay!
if she wont let me see the kids
call the cops from outside her house
they will MAKE her give him the kids
that's how it works

overpay?
you can NEVER overpay unless you are a millionaire
kids have so many unexpected needs

I feel sorry for the kids

my dad married a woman that felt like you did
she made my life a living HELL

 

[Much2much41]

I was wondering this too since Ashmak stated MANY times throughout her numerous posts what her BF's situation was.

I was sitting here reading and thinking, "is it just me, or are people really missing that point?" erplexed

The advice about the lawyer sounds like a good idea to me.

I'm confused, too. He doesn't have the money, he has very little time, and if he doesn't work and go to school, in the end, he loses whatever money he paid for school and could lose his job, and then how will the children be provided for? How will the dad provide for himself? Employers and colleges couldn't care less about what's going on in your personal life. It is what it is. He hasn't been in the situation that long, and it takes time to rearrange things. We as women, tend to be more emotional than men, so all we can think about is "I need to see my babies", and will reverse the earths' spin on its axle to do what needs to be done to make it happen. Men tend to think things through more logically, "I need to see my babies", so he goes to work to make the money to care for them, gets his schooling under his belt to make MORE money so they are properly cared for, goes through the system, has a setback or two (or ten erplexed), but he gets there. Same result, just a different way of going about things. I think some of the ladies here are being a bit harsh. It's a tough situation, and not everybody does things the same way.

 

[14got]

I don't know if I would WANT a man that could sign away his blood so easily

I have a cousin who is a lawyer and my best friend works for the AG in Austin
there's NO way she can keep the kids away from him if he REALLy wants to see them

all he has to do is call the AG tell them what's going on
call the police in the HOMEtown , let them know what's up and you will need a car
if she doesn't comply she got to jail and he STILL gets the kids for the weekend
sounds like a win -win

 

[Caramela]

BF and K never dated. He had sex with her once (his first time too) and then never heard from the girl again until like 3 months later. At that time, she informed him that she was pregnant. BF had no idea if the kids were his since he only slept with her once and never heard from her again. Chance are she was having other one night stands too.

Well, about a year or so later BF gets a letter from the courts saying that he needs to pay child support. He is like,what? for who? He had not talked to K since she initially said she was pregnant. By this time, the kids were aleady about one year old. So he goes to court to see this girl he has not talked to in over a year, and indeed, the kids are his.

Chances are she was having one night stands with other people? Chances are he was too? And unprotected? I'm sorry but the bolded parts are unbelievable ... as in, I don't believe your BF is being honest First of all, his first time (as in virgin first time?) was with K? Unprotected and he didn't talk to her again? IMHO it sounds like there's more too it. You only know what he tells you, but for her to act crazy, it would seem he's telling her some of what she wants to hear too. Just like he's doing with you. And child support... they aren't going to order him to pay child support just like that, and especially since they hadn't yet established paternity first.
Be careful.

 

[Much2much41]

I don't know if I would WANT a man that could sign away his blood so easily

I have a cousin who is a lawyer and my best friend works for the AG in Austin
there's NO way she can keep the kids away from him if he REALLy wants to see them

all he has to do is call the AG tell them what's going on
call the police in the HOMEtown , let them know what's up and you will need a car
if she doesn't comply she got to jail and he STILL gets the kids for the weekend
sounds like a win -win

What is "AG"?

 

[sunnydaze]

What is "AG"?

Assuming Attorney General.

 

[gone_fishing]

I don't know where to post this, but since it has so much to do with my realtionship, I'll post it here.

Well today everything hit the fan! My BF finally had to go to the police to file a report against .........................................his baby mama! This girl is beyond crazy. I really think she does need some psychological help. This girl, whom I will call K, calls 10+ times a day just to talk to my bf.

Is she calling to talk about their boys (they have twins together)? NO
Is she calling about anything of value or importance about the boys or my bf? NO
So what is she calling for? She is calling to tell my BF that he HAS to talk to her because they have kids together. Not only that, he HAS to call her just to see how she is doing and how her day is going because she is the mother of the kids.

Since when did having kids with someone mean that one is obligated to call the other just to see what they are having for dinner, etc....

Now, that that is out of the way, here is a little background on their 'relationship'. BF and K never dated. He had sex with her once (his first time too) and then never heard from the girl again until like 3 months later. At that time, she informed him that she was pregnant. BF had no idea if the kids were his since he only slept with her once and never heard from her again. Chance are she was having other one night stands too.

Well, about a year or so later BF gets a letter from the courts saying that he needs to pay child support. He is like,what? for who? He had not talked to K since she initially said she was pregnant. By this time, the kids were aleady about one year old. So he goes to court to see this girl he has not talked to in over a year, and indeed, the kids are his.

Well BF and K live about 8 hours away. He is in school. She is not. As a matter of fact she does not work either. She actually refuses to. BF has offered to even pay for full daycare expenses for the kids while she goes back to school or gets a job a couple of days a week. She won't do that either.

Now fast forward to the present. BF and I have been together for over a year. The second she found out he had a GF she started going crazy. She has lied to BF about her parents dying, the kids being deaf, being married, and a whole array of things. JUST CRAZY!

My boyfriend does not know these kids at all. She will not allow him to come and see them, even though he can only see them about twice a year due to school and having to work full-time to afford child support. When we did make the drive to see the kids she said she was 'busy'. She has recenlty moved in with another man after being kicked out of the apartment she lived in with her sister.

I could go on and on for days about this girl, but I will spare you ladies. Do any of you ladies have problems dealing with your SO's baby mama? Will this ever get better. I want to marry my BF but I don't know if I should put myself through all of this drama he keeps having, even though I know he is not the cause.

Not to instigate...but are you sure you have the whole story...you know...his side...her side...and the truth?

I know I have a friend in a similar situation and after speaking with the girl she learned that baby was not the result of a one night stand...and that there was more to HIS behavior that was making her go bonkers...

I'm not saying that's the case here, I'm just saying...be mindful that there's always two sides to every story.

Still in NO WAY should she be lying on you or disrespecting you. Have you met? I'd stay out of it altogether. Do you all live together?

 

[gone_fishing]

Chances are she was having one night stands with other people? Chances are he was too? And unprotected? I'm sorry but the bolded parts are unbelievable ... as in, I don't believe your BF is being honest First of all, his first time (as in virgin first time?) was with K? Unprotected and he didn't talk to her again? IMHO it sounds like there's more too it. You only know what he tells you, but for her to act crazy, it would seem he's telling her some of what she wants to hear too. Just like he's doing with you. And child support... they aren't going to order him to pay child support just like that, and especially since they hadn't yet established paternity first.
Be careful.

I second that...I get the feeling he's leaving out stuff...

 

[14got]

Assuming Attorney General.

thanks SD

 

[Miss_Jetsetter]

And, every post I've read about how he is responding has made me cringe...he made these babies and now it's an inconvenience? Pay his child support and just stay out of the picture? That's horrible for the boys. Not admirable at all.

Get of my my damn head!!! When I read that, my mouth literally dropped.

Girl, I would TOTALLY lose respect for a guy who had the audacity to say something like that aloud. It's like, man up dude! If you don't want the responsibility, then DON"T HAVE THE SEX!

My thing is, whose to say that he wouldn't do the same thing to you? What makes you so exempt?

Also, I think it's very delusional to think that you could just place yourself as "Their fathers wife" and not their stepmother. No offense, but that's like the silliest thing I've heard in a while.

My advice to you is if you are so against being anyones stepmother, then don't marry a guy with kids. Totally logical, right?

 

[Laginappe]

He sure has a laundry list excuses for punking out on his responsibilities. Could be for the best though. If these kids are already dealing with one irresponsible parent, best save them the added stress of trying to accomodate another one.

Although since you say he doesn't want custody, which translates to not wanting contact period, then all of his excuse making makes sense. He simply doesn't want to put in the time and effort.

ETA: College is not an excuse. There are folks all over who are parenting, working and going to school. He sounds like quite the catch.

 

[ashmack]

Thanks for those who sincerely had advice to give. I appreciate that. My situation has already gotten a lot better. I understand that everyone will have their own opinion about my boyfrind and thinking he is leaving things out and could do more, etc.... That's fine. I don't feel the need to even address that because I do know his situation. Sadly, many times it is a case of a deadbeat dad or a guy running away from his responsibilities or whatever. This is not the case here. THat was not even my original intent. I was seeking advice on what to do when you are dealing with a crazy person that continues to cause problems on purpose. It's ok if you do not choose to address that. The insinuations can continue now.

 

[Priss Pot]

Thanks for those who sincerely had advice to give. I appreciate that. My situation has already gotten a lot better. I understand that everyone will have their own opinion about my boyfrind and thinking he is leaving things out and could do more, etc.... That's fine. I don't feel the need to even address that because I do know his situation. Sadly, many times it is a case of a deadbeat dad or a guy running away from his responsibilities or whatever. This is not the case here. THat was not even my original intent. I was seeking advice on what to do when you are dealing with a crazy person that continues to cause problems on purpose. It's ok if you do not choose to address that. The insinuations can continue now.

Ashmack, please don't worry about the negativity. I hope that you've gotten some solid advice from the more positive posts here.

To the person who said that college isn't an excuse. It IS an excuse, especially when you're 6-8 hours away. I'm not saying to put school before your kids, but try your best to find a balance between the two. I honestly believe that the guy is trying. He just needs to find someone in his hometown to represent his case so that it won't be just put on hold.

 

[Laginappe]

I'm going to backtrack because I've thought about this for a few hours today and my earlier post was wrong.

No one should be forced to be a parent if they don't want to. And I think that's what's going on here (and I missed that fact before). Since this was a one night stand/ no relationship situation, he basically gambled and lost. So did she (the mother of these children) in believing that carrying a pregnancy to term means that you can force someone else to be interested in you, your life, or the lives of the children you create. I don't really blame him for not being interested. Few people would.

He's going to have to use the law - whichever ones he can - to deal with this from now on. Court orders, lawyers, mediators...whathaveyou. Keep trying with the various father's rights organizations to see if they can be of assistance. He'll have to treat this like a business deal until those kids are grown because he's stuck. He should never forget who he's dealing with (or how he got in this situation) and be on guard for the next 20-odd years. And probably even after that.

As for your role in this as his current SO and future wife. I disagree that you're going to be able to distance yourself from this. Everything everyone's stated before will be relevant in your life as long as you share his. You will be those children's stepmother - even if he never lays eyes on them ever again. I think you said that she has a relationship with his parents so I'm assuming that his parents are embracing their grandchildren? How will that come into play when/if you have children? Will you not allow your children around grandma when grandma is with the other set of grandchildren? And how will you deal with being looked upon in a negative light by your in-laws for not embracing ALL of their son's children as they have?

And what if 5 yrs from now his feelings change about wanting to know his children? If you're married with kids at the time, would you walk then? Then you'd have the issue of seperating your children from their father because you couldn't accept those other children in your life.

How will you deal with the question of your own children wanting to know their siblings? And it comes out via family grapevine that the one standing in the way of that relationship was Mom?

I'm just throwing out questions that need to be considered at gut level before you progress further in this.

And something else. You have to stop wondering and hoping that things are going to get better. That's the way to make yourself miserable. If you stay in this, you have to do so with the general acceptance of the way things are today. Worst case scenario - it might never get better. You could be filing restraining orders and dealing with juvenile text messages 10 years from now. Make your decisions based on what you know is true today vs what you hope might occur tomorrow.

 

[Laginappe]

To the person who said that college isn't an excuse. It IS an excuse, especially when you're 6-8 hours away. I'm not saying to put school before your kids, but try your best to find a balance between the two. I honestly believe that the guy is trying. He just needs to find someone in his hometown to represent his case so that it won't be just put on hold.

There's trying and then there's trying. Totally depends on your dedication to the cause. In this particular situation, yes I agree that he's trying to a point. But there are options IF he was inclined. Colleges can be had all over. Move closer to your kids. College can be combined with childcare/parenting plus a job (or two). Parents do it all day every day. But they want to. This guy doesn't, so sending a check and maintaining his distance is the limit of what he's willing to commit to. I don't really fault him for it.

 

[MissYocairis]

...maybe we can get a spinoff thread going...Lag's comment got me to thinking...

...this isn't directed at the OP...but...in general, when a man impregnates a woman...is he justified in saying "I do not want this child; therefore, I will not be in this child's life"...if his original intent wasn't to impregnate her?

I mean...do men who don't wrap it up have the leeway LATER...to come back after-the-fact like "oh...ah...nevermind!"

 

[Princess4real]

...maybe we can get a spinoff thread going...Lag's comment got me to thinking...

...this isn't directed at the OP...but...in general, when a man impregnates a woman...is he justified in saying "I do not want this child; therefore, I will not be in this child's life"...if his original intent wasn't to impregnate her?

I mean...do men who don't wrap it up have the leeway LATER...to come back after-the-fact like "oh...ah...nevermind!"

CantBeCopied,

That would be a good thread, but let's say he used a condom. Could he then get out of taking care of the child because he used protection?