Am I the *only* one who's becoming a bitter, old hag?! (VENT)

[Integrity]

I have a girlfriend who is almost 40 now. She is the sweetest literally the sweetest person I have EVER met in my life - EVER!

She was 38 when she finally got married and she felt a lot like you. It came in a whirlwind for her.

She was working some place (forget where at the time) and her husband (now) came into the store and was totally head over heels for her immediately.

He came back to wear she worked every day trying to get her attention.

One day he came to her job and someone was like so n so is here to speak to you and she was like WHAT DOES HE WANT! This was funny because like I said she's sweet as pie and never raises her voice.

It was an improbably romance but a year later they married and after 3 engagements called off by her she is the happiest she has ever been and I mean they are truly happy and in love.

When she talks about it now she says that she would not have been ready for the man her husband was even a year earlier. She was still growing and maturing and she stresses that the right person coming at the wrong time is no good! That is why you have to look for God's direction on those types of things. Following His way will ensure that the right man comes at the right time.

Your turn is coming and you know what - while all your friends are getting married and arguing and divorcing and going through drama - just know that when it's your turn - your patience will pay off. Your discernment will pay off and God willing you will be with the man of your dreams SANS the drama and heartache.

There are a lot of people kissy kissy on the street that are punchy punchy and cursy cursy when they get home. Everything is not as it appears from the outside so don't dwell on the kissy faced people so much.

I have a lot of female friends that are in their current relationship just to be with someone and not happy.

Sometimes, you know even I evaluate my OWN relationship trying to make sure I'm with the right man.

I know we are all kissy faced in public and people like you probably see us but that doesn't mean things are always all roses all the time.

Keep your head up and hugs to you.

Good things come to those who wait!

So wonderful. Thanks for sharing. I am cosigning to the sentiments shared in this post.

Serenity, I am 28 this week. No husband and no kids, no boyfriend. I have made up my mind that I would rather be made to wait until meeting my true love in the final 12 months of my life. Better than settling for any old man now just to be able to say 'I have a man' and then endure a lifetime of stress and utter regret. A lot of married people are going through this, believe me!

 

[UmSumayyah]

I'm still waiting on that update.

I'll forgive you if you are at a bbq though.

 

[MizzBrown]

Did you ever see that episode on Oprah where they observed that 70% of black women are single? AND about 65-70% of black children are born out of wedlock?

When i learned that, it was reassuring and depressing. Nice to know i wasn't the only one yet depressing looking at the large number. I always remind my married friends to be thankful for what they have cause I am jealous as hell.

Also depressing that most of those women have children out of wedlock for the sake of their "biological clock".

I believe that when you are NOT looking, that's when God decides to sneak the one you were waiting on up to you.

 

[Bunny77]

Did you ever see that episode on Oprah where they observed that 70% of black women are single?

What percentage of black men are single?

 

[Kiadodie]

Girl, no you’re not the only one like this.

First off, I’m in the SAME EXACT boat. I’m 35, single, no potentials. Now, I have men trying to date me but I’m not interested in ANY of them. I don’t believe in wasting time either. I got depressed over the summer because it didn’t work out with the guy I really like. He didn’t want any commitment. So I left him alone.

So, I literally QUIT looking, and gave it to God. It was hard. I prayed every night so that God could take the loneliness away. He finally did.

God made it clear to me that I needed to love myself before anyone could love me. So, that’s what I am working on, ME. I’m reading books like Calling in the One. It made it clear in the book that I’m attracting men that can’t commit cause I’m not committed to myself. You attract what you are. So now I’m devoted to me.

I cleaned out my closet (clutter) to get ready for the man that God has for me. In essence I’m preparing myself for my mate. I’ve asked God to heal anything deep within that I may not know of that is hindering me from meeting and marrying my soul mate. So, God is preparing me.

I live in the DC area too, and it’s horrible. erplexed ALL my women friends are single and miserable but I don’t let that get me down. When they talk about how miserable they are or complain, inside it doesn’t bother me anymore because I have faith that one day I WILL be in love and married.

So dear, stop dating guys you know you don’t like. It’s a waste of time. Also, look within so you clear anything that may be blocking love from coming into your life (LOA).

 

[laCriolla]

I don't want to hear any love songs. I don't want to see people kissing in the streets. I hate chick-flicks and romantic films. I sat in Starbucks this morning and when that song "To Be Loved" came on, I nearly broke down in tears and had to storm out of there.

I can't lie: I want to be in love. I want to be love. I have so much love in my heart and soul to give to a man. I am so lonely that I could cry myself to sleep every night.

And I feel that I have paid my dues. I've waited all my life for this. Really...I've been so patient and I'm getting older. Maybe I'm feeling like I'm freaking out. I'll be 36 soon, no husband, no children. My biological clock is ticking. I know it's not politically correct to say that and I know that some of you will come back at me with: you need to be patient, what have you been doing wrong. IT'S NOT ME!!! (I think...)

I'm just so sad and depressed. I feel like I'm wasting time. And I do still battle with guilt because the guy who loves me I don't love him back at all. I simply don't love him and I feel awful that I don't. Here I am complaining that I have no one in my life. And yet this guy who would lay down his life for me, but I don't feel the same AT ALL!! I'm trying to force my feelings but they won't come. And then I start to resent him because I should be out there trying to find the right man for me and yet I'm spending time with him. I end up hating myself and feeling a tremendous amount of guilt at the same time. I am so incredibly depressed and sitting here crying in front of the computer. I desperately want a man to love me BUT I WANT TO FEEL THE SAME ABOUT HIM!!!!

I don't feel beautiful or pretty. I don't feel desirable or sexy at all. I'm tired of feeling like this and I wanna know...

WHEN WILL IT BE MY TURN, DAMMIT!! WHERE'S MY MAN??!!

Seriously, am I the *only* one who feels like this??!???

stay faithful

have you ever thought that GOD is working on him? YOur guy isn't ready yet.