Would you end it?

[t23luvgod]

If you were on spring break and you cheated on your man moreso out of spite from a previous situation but you told him hours after it happened. And he tells you that he cheated on you early in the week w/o reason and proceded to spend time with you, takes you out wine and dines you,sex etc without telling you of cheating. In my book what he did was worse because he didnt tell me for days and only told me because of what i did.

If the good equals the bad, and the relationship has so much potential..would you end it?

 

[Skyfall]

this relationship has no potential
you both a sound a bit immature and have alot of growing up to do

 

[dimechiq]

^^ said it all.

 

[panamoni]

LOL, what you both did was wrong. The fact that you told him hours after doesn't make it "less wrong".

You end the relationship if you don't want to be in the relationship anymore. If it's not right for you. If you are not being treated the way you believe you deserve to be treated. That's all. No need to consider anything else other than whether your needs are being met. Obviously, when you get into a relationship where you feel loved and respected and vice versa, there shouldn't be any cheating going on.

 

[t23luvgod]

oh yea, both parties are wrong. everything seemed right until this week...Despite what happened i was being treated the way i wanted to be treated, so does this one bad situation ruin a whole relationship?

 

[MissJ]

That's messed up on both ends, and there's no excuse for any of it. Yeah, I'd end it and start over with a healthy relationship.

 

[panamoni]

oh yea, both parties are wrong. everything seemed right until this week...Despite what happened i was being treated the way i wanted to be treated, so does this one bad situation ruin a whole relationship?

Did EVERYTHING seem right up until this week? Are you sure? Was there maybe one thing that wasn't right?

If not, then, I'll stick to what I said above -- if your needs are being met, have at it. Seems odd though. You guys both happened to cheat during the same week for the first time? He's never done it before? Well, you probably wouldn't know, considering when he did it this week you had no idea until he told you.

Do you trust him? What does he do to show himself to be trustworthy?

 

[krikit96]

This is ridiculous. End the relationship and move on. You didn't even have a clue he cheated. You will never know if he's done it before, even if he SWEARS it was the 1st time, how can you trust him? How can he trust you ever again as well? If you did it out of spite for something that happened earlier, but it wasn't because he was cheating, NOW what's gonna happen in the future? There will always be doubt on both ends... there will always be that question... chalk it up. It's not worth the hassle... this is NOT a way to start a real relationship...

My hubby just said hell no, move on!!!! He said dude is already gonna be emotionally detached, because he was already cheating on you, and now he knows you aren't relationship worthy. On to the next one!

 

[Lilakoi’s_Sister]

i don't see how the relationship, if continued, will go anywhere after all this. i'd end it as soon as possible although it's hard it will only get harder if you continue. by the way, how can you have a relationship without trust which will be lacking after all this cheating.

 

[Bunny77]

oh yea, both parties are wrong. everything seemed right until this week...Despite what happened i was being treated the way i wanted to be treated, so does this one bad situation ruin a whole relationship?

Everything was so great, yet y'all both cheat within a week? Yeah, okay.

It doesn't sound like either one of you really need to be in a relationship right now. I co-sign what danibeeja_gyal said completely.

Break up, then y'all can sex whoever you want without consequence.

 

[MissJ]

This is ridiculous. End the relationship and move on. You didn't even have a clue he cheated. You will never know if he's done it before, even if he SWEARS it was the 1st time, how can you trust him? How can he trust you ever again as well? If you did it out of spite for something that happened earlier, but it wasn't because he was cheating, NOW what's gonna happen in the future? There will always be doubt on both ends... there will always be that question... chalk it up. It's not worth the hassle... this is NOT a way to start a real relationship...

My hubby just said hell no, move on!!!! He said dude is already gonna be emotionally detached, because he was already cheating on you, and now he knows you aren't relationship worthy. On to the next one!

Ouch! Your hubby gives it straight with no chaser. But I agree with everything y'all said.

 

[DivineNapps1728]

Something must have been wrong for you to cheat; if it was an act of retaliation there was already an issue that needed resolving & now there are many more. Personally I couldn't be with someone I couldn't trust or someone I could so easily step out on.

I think you should let him go & take some time out from dating so you can heal and decide what you want & need in a relationship.

 

[t23luvgod]

This is ridiculous. End the relationship and move on. You didn't even have a clue he cheated. You will never know if he's done it before, even if he SWEARS it was the 1st time, how can you trust him? How can he trust you ever again as well? If you did it out of spite for something that happened earlier, but it wasn't because he was cheating, NOW what's gonna happen in the future? There will always be doubt on both ends... there will always be that question... chalk it up. It's not worth the hassle... this is NOT a way to start a real relationship...

My hubby just said hell no, move on!!!! He said dude is already gonna be emotionally detached, because he was already cheating on you, and now he knows you aren't relationship worthy. On to the next one!

i like it blunt! but very true...idk he did this before when we were "talking" so i was still angry about that but thats a inner conflict.

 

[awhyley]

oh yea, both parties are wrong. everything seemed right until this week...Despite what happened i was being treated the way i wanted to be treated, so does this one bad situation ruin a whole relationship?

I'm surprised that you think that this is just ONE BAD situation. Was he protected when he cheated on you? Where you protected when you cheated on him? Just because is 'wined and dined' you, that's not the be all and end all of a relationship. He already proved to you that he does not respect you and vice versa, and respect is the cornerstone of any good relationship. Continuing this relationship is asking for a world of hurt.

i like it blunt! but very true...idk he did this before when we were "talking" so i was still angry about that but thats a inner conflict.

So what you're saying is that this happened before yall got together? I'm confused.
(I smell excuses)

 

[antisocial]

This can't be for real

 

[MissYocairis]

If you were on spring break and you cheated on your man moreso out of spite from a previous situation but you told him hours after it happened. And he tells you that he cheated on you early in the week w/o reason and proceded to spend time with you, takes you out wine and dines you,sex etc without telling you of cheating. In my book what he did was worse because he didnt tell me for days and only told me because of what i did.

If the good equals the bad, and the relationship has so much potential..would you end it?

This makes me Girl, why are y'all cheating and then trying to also be serious about each other? Why not just agree to date others? Retaliatory cheating is a bad sign and so is score-keeping (I told him 3 hours later while he told me 27 hours later).

Retaliatory cheating only makes things worse and sells you out for a nickle just to spite someone else. Score-keeping diverts attention away from the most important things in a relationship.

It's not who told first, it's how bout no cheating at all or else deciding not to be exclusive?

I think you should reevaluate what you want in a love relationship at this point. Maybe you aren't ready for an exclusive relationship or maybe he isn't the one.

 

[mscocoface]

^^^ ITA what she said.

This does not sound like a healthy relationship by any means.

And no one has even mentioned the elephant in the room. Are either of you going to be checking yourselves for the next year to make sure you DID NOT contract any viral or bacterial STDs? Remember most of the time you can't see or even determine if you have HPV, Chlamydia and a lot other STDs yourself. Even if you used protection it does not protect you from many of these.

 

[MissMeWithThatIsh]

....Why are you even asking us this grade school question?
So we can tell you, "Yea girl you're in the right!"

He cheated, you got your revenge. Now that you have, dump him because it's handled and it's over. Retaliatory infidelity only makes things worse.

 

[Mai Tai]

If you were on spring break and you cheated on your man moreso out of spite from a previous situation but you told him hours after it happened. And he tells you that he cheated on you early in the week w/o reason and proceded to spend time with you, takes you out wine and dines you,sex etc without telling you of cheating. In my book what he did was worse because he didnt tell me for days and only told me because of what i did.

If the good equals the bad, and the relationship has so much potential..would you end it?

Hold on...I missed the part where the "good" outweighed the bad...I'm sooo confused...am I being punked...

 

[ThatJerseyGirl]

da hell goin on hea.... *lights up a newort one hunnit for dis dumb shyt*

dayum dat....i'm still tryna figa out why would u even tell him in da first dayum place dat'chu cheated....fa what? yall married? oh, i ain't think so. are u mad cuz he told u da truth, or are u mad that he screwed some otha chick? well, least he was honest n told u.

ok, so u cheated out of spite from a previous situation, then hours later, u told him?

u cheated out of spite like that was gonna hurt him? am i hearin dis right? chile puleez.....what he do? did he looked at sumotha chick or he got sumotha chick's numba, so u went and gave some puddi up out of spite to anotha broke bama?

first of all, imma needu to undastand dat in dis case, da puddi should neva be used as a "imma gitchu back sucka" kinda tool. das numba one. numba two, imma need u to dummy up a lil. u played urself. twice. to him and to da otha bama u gave it up too.

i bet when u told him, u thought u was hurtin his feelings, but then when he told u he cheated, u got bent outta shape, now u wanna break things off. it was ova before it started. so how u gonna end sumfin that has already ended (rememba, the previous situation). numba three, neva snitch on da almight puddi. EVER!!!

and numba whateva da phuck numba i'm on (been sippin t'day), da next time u decide to have a "true confession" please make sure ur shyt is in order.....

 

[TayMac]

^^Cosign with ThatJerseyGirl!

Wining and dining, sex and spending time with you doesn't FIX or EXCUSE cheating, trust issues and whatever the heck else you all have going on.

 

[ladysaraii]

Anyone else feel the need to compile JerseyGirl's posts and put together a pamphlet? There's some good info in there.

 

[MissYocairis]

da hell goin on hea.... *lights up a newort one hunnit for dis dumb shyt*

dayum dat....i'm still tryna figa out why would u even tell him in da first dayum place dat'chu cheated....fa what? yall married? oh, i ain't think so. are u mad cuz he told u da truth, or are u mad that he screwed some otha chick? well, least he was honest n told u.

ok, so u cheated out of spite from a previous situation, then hours later, u told him?

u cheated out of spite like that was gonna hurt him? am i hearin dis right? chile puleez.....what he do? did he looked at sumotha chick or he got sumotha chick's numba, so u went and gave some puddi up out of spite to anotha broke bama?

first of all, imma needu to undastand dat in dis case, da puddi should neva be used as a "imma gitchu back sucka" kinda tool. das numba one. numba two, imma need u to dummy up a lil. u played urself. twice. to him and to da otha bama u gave it up too.

i bet when u told him, u thought u was hurtin his feelings, but then when he told u he cheated, u got bent outta shape, now u wanna break things off. it was ova before it started. so how u gonna end sumfin that has already ended (rememba, the previous situation). numba three, neva snitch on da almight puddi. EVER!!!

and numba whateva da phuck numba i'm on (been sippin t'day), da next time u decide to have a "true confession" please make sure ur shyt is in order.....

This time I could HEAR Ma'Dea's VOICE as I read your post! Is that you, Tyler?

 

[Guitarhero]

Anyone else feel the need to compile JerseyGirl's posts and put together a pamphlet? There's some good info in there.

LOL. As long as there is a glossary of terms in the back. "puddi"