MissMasala5
New Member
If you had a friend who was in a relationship with a man that later ended, would he be fair game for you down the road? And if so, would you tell your friend about it, especially if it were just a one time hook up?
Would you date/sleep with your friend's ex?
- Thread starter MissMasala5
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Naveah2050
Well-Known Member
no.....friends exes are off limits - and if I did it I wouldnt tell.
MissMasala5
New Member
Thanks for the responses. On the flip side, what if a friend of yours slept with your ex after you all broke up? And told you about it? Would you be wrong for feeling salty even though the guy has been out of your life for ages and you are currently in a LTR with someone else?
eyunka
Well-Known Member
For me its just an unwritten rule you don't date your friend's ex. If it was done to me and you say its been years down the line and I'm in another relationship....hmmmmm my first reaction would be salty but then i would have to check myself, those are two grown people they can do what they want, besides I'm in my own relationship why should i care.
For me I just couldnt do it.
For me I just couldnt do it.
MissMasala5
New Member
Re: the bolded, good point. You shouldn't care. But would it change your perception of the friend or the friendship?
SunySydeofLyfe
Well-Known Member
I wonder if the 'ex's are off limits is a black thing? I havent and dont think I would but I after seeing this movie with Wesley Snipes some years back I wondered always why black girls think its wrong? I mean if he is a nice guy...things didnt work out between them and you are compatible....who knows he coulda met the wrong girl at the wrong time...hmmm...random thoughts......
Mai Tai
Miss Nigeria-America
I don't think I would be able to sleep at night knowing that the same things he has done to me, he has done to my best friend. I would not be able to kid myself into thinking that those special moves he uses on me in bed were not just used on my BFF just weeks or months ago.
CarLiTa
Well-Known Member
Someone a friend dated casually (just a few dates) keeps asking me out. I have turned him down, saying that I don't feel comfortable (nor am I attracted to him). He somehow does not see anything wrong with it.
Actually, if it is someone I dated casually, I actually don't mind if someone I know dates him down the line. Ok, we went out a few times, we weren't compatible, maybe she'll be compatible with him
If I had had a serious relationship with that person, then no. And vice versa.
Maybe a decade down the line it will be fine.
Actually, if it is someone I dated casually, I actually don't mind if someone I know dates him down the line. Ok, we went out a few times, we weren't compatible, maybe she'll be compatible with him
If I had had a serious relationship with that person, then no. And vice versa.
Maybe a decade down the line it will be fine.
daydreem2876
carpe diem
I would not date a friends ex... its the priciple of the matter
I can't control if my friend dates my ex, but honestly, I could not be a good friend to her... again, its the priciple of the matter
I can't control if my friend dates my ex, but honestly, I could not be a good friend to her... again, its the priciple of the matter
bluediamond0829
Well-Known Member
No definetly not. Thats completly someone that is off limits. And right i couldnt cross that line...
yokoyokogirl
New Member
If my friend was ok with it, then maybe it would be ok...
(did that even make sense?)
But for me personally no.
I was in loooooove with this Kappa hottie all senior year of college. We liked the same music, hobbies, and he was mad funny. But I knew he used to be bed buddies with one of my good friends (who was a ho. a sweet kind ho. but a ho nonetheless..) so I could never get with him. I could never get the image of my sweet super-ho friend getting down with him...so we just stayed friends.
(did that even make sense?)
But for me personally no.
I was in loooooove with this Kappa hottie all senior year of college. We liked the same music, hobbies, and he was mad funny. But I knew he used to be bed buddies with one of my good friends (who was a ho. a sweet kind ho. but a ho nonetheless..) so I could never get with him. I could never get the image of my sweet super-ho friend getting down with him...so we just stayed friends.
eyunka
Well-Known Member
Wow your really coming with the questions to make me think. My 1st reaction to that question was no...then i paused and thought, then my answer was I'm just not sure because i haven't really been in that situation. I can say what i think I'm going to feel but i won't really know.
I would hope to think that my answer is still no, years has passed and my ex may be the one for my friend and if she is really my friend i should be happy for her right?
I would hope to think that my answer is still no, years has passed and my ex may be the one for my friend and if she is really my friend i should be happy for her right?
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vivEz daNs lamouR
Well-Known Member
Hell yes it would.
If she could sleep with my ex-boyfriend, then what's stopping her from sleeping with my current beau? That'd be just SOME of the things I'd think about.
Plus, it's just an unwritten rule. You don't touch other people's things (in this case, exes). I sure as hell wouldn't even feel comfortable doing that and I certainly would hope that my friends have the same amount of integrity to not do that to me.
Ex or not, its someone I once had feelings for as he did for me, that's ALWAYS going to be a touchy subject.
scorpio70
New Member
Here I go with the anecdotal exception: A friend of mine from college dated this guy for some months, maybe a year and he ended up being a royal jerk. The jerk had a roommate that was peeping the whole situation. Eventually, my friend and the jerk broke up. Enter the roommate. He asked her out, they began dating and have now been married for almost 10 years.
If either of them had thought the other was 'off limits' they could've missed out on their soulmates.
If either of them had thought the other was 'off limits' they could've missed out on their soulmates.
vivEz daNs lamouR
Well-Known Member
Were the jerk and the roommate really good friends? How long did they know each other?
I consider your example a tad bit different from the OP.
Divine_Order
New Member
Ew...that would be like sharing your girls used panties.
No, there are other men out there for me. Ima wear someone else's used drawers.
No, there are other men out there for me. Ima wear someone else's used drawers.
LookingandListening
New Member
Naw. It's just...
naturalmanenyc
Well-Known Member
No, never.
I don't think it's a Black/White thing either. A white, female coworker's BFF (white female) ended up married to her ex husband (white male). Even years later, my coworker wants to kill the woman and nearly slapped the new wife (former BFF) in the bathroom at a funeral earlier this month.
I don't think it's a Black/White thing either. A white, female coworker's BFF (white female) ended up married to her ex husband (white male). Even years later, my coworker wants to kill the woman and nearly slapped the new wife (former BFF) in the bathroom at a funeral earlier this month.
Lylddlebit
Well-Known Member
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ChocalateDiva
Well-Known Member
I totally agree with the bolded......................................as long as its not MY ex.
Ediese
Well-Known Member
That's just 'stank'. I would NEVER do it. Even if I was broken up with the guy and probably married, I don't think it would be in good taste for my 'friend' to date my ex. If it was just an acquaintance/associate, then that's okay. However, if it was a 'true friend', I would have a problem with it.
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