I'm sorry this happened to you Misshairdiva and (IMO) the family members and "friends" who are discouraging you from doing what you feel is best and encouraging you to disregard your values are doing you a MAJOR disservice.
I agree that women aren't expected to cheat in the same way men are, but if a man makes a "conscious decision" to avoid bad situations, doesn't he also make a conscious decisions NOT to avoid them? Sure men have desires (we all do), but they also have the ability to control them. And (if I understand the blue correctly), since the man- not his DW or GF- makes the final decision about his behavior I think the woman who feels she can control it is giving herself a false sense of security.
erplexed She told me that if her husband cheated and had another child then it was her child too and her husband knows it 
Dh and I discussed before being married that either of us being unfaithful meant divorce for us. 
My heart goes out to you. I know someone that is going thru the same issue and her elder family members basically told her she should accept his cheating.
They have been unhappily married since the first year of this 9 year sham because she found the phone records, cards etc. She is asking the same question. Why didn't he marry his ex that he obviously can't leave alone? He told her its her weight gain but he never stopped dealing with the ex and she has all the proof. I'm glad you love yourself enough to leave because he is a serial cheat from the looks of it.
