Why are you black? Your not black?

lovely_locks

Well-Known Member
i was at the store and these two women and black and white asked me why my hair is so curley and if its natural. I have 3c/4a hair. I said idk, thats how it grows. Then they asked me if i concidered myself black, i said yes. They asked me my nationality next. I told them im black and white mixed. The black lady then told me im not black. I said nothing. Just stared at her. She asked me why do you call yourself black when you are not? You are light skinned and have curly hair. I told her that i never noticed skin color untill a white person asked me why i talk white, and my this black girl came up behind me and told that white girl "leave my BLACK friend alone." this happend to me when i was a little. So after this short story the two ladies justed stared at me. I told them other people chose my race, not me. The black lady just shook her head at me. Then she said, if your fifty, fifty you cant call yourself black. I then told her that my mom is fifty, fifty and my dad is full so i am mostly black (even my mother conciders herself black because she syas that black people accept her more thne white people do.) then the white lady said no your not, not with that light skin and curly hair.....OMG! Why do i have to defend myself.....
 
people are too much. You don't have to defend yourself. Next time ask them why it is so important to them to assign you a race, or even better just decline the conversation politely and keep it moving.
 
Girl, never argue with an idiot because that will make you an idiot. That's first degree ignorance and she should be arrested and thrown into imbecile prison. 5 tickets!
 
Girl, I know the feeling. People are constantly telling me that I am not black because I am supposedly light skinned, have "good" hair and talk "white." I honestly don't care anymore. I am brown/AFrican American and proud of it.

And quite honestly I find it funny when people have nothing better to do than try to define me when they should be worrying about defining themselves. Some people are just jealous and too insecure about who they are so don't let it get to you. As long as you you are comfortable with the skin and hair that god gave you there is no problem. So don't waste your time trying to explain/defend yourself to the simple minded. It's just gonna be a waste of time.
 
Why even entertain the convo?? I am gathering they were strangers...EITHER WAY...they would have missed me with all of that. I have to justify NO-THING!!!

Wait...okay..let me read more than just the first few lines....

Nope...I still stand by my original comment. People get on my LAST nerve!! Trying to attach their hang-ups to others...wow. Those conversations should see your backside. Period.Dot.

~S~
 
Like my mom always says, "it takes one drop of chocolate to turn a whole glass of milk". your nationality is no one's business but yours. if they don't accept it, who cares? they better scratch their *** and get glad! I hear it all the time. I'm light skinned(Creole and Irish) AND I live in the south. its always something. Her ignorant behind was probably jealous of your gorgeous hair anyway. She had like 10 week old chewed up glued on weave huh???
 
What about our society gives people the right to verbally attack others? This is ridiculous. You don't have to justify or 'prove' your blackness to anyone. And anyone that knows anything about black people knows that we come in different colors, textures, and sizes. I'm so tired of this . . . :hammer:
 
That was a bit much. I guess she wanted you to say you were mixed or something. Regardless, who is she to tell you what race you should identify with.
 
The minute they started questioning you and trying to tell you what you are and aren't you should've chucked the deuces. My SO has the same mix as you except his father is the one that's 50/50. When people try to talk all that jazz in his face he shuts that down. You define you.
 
The minute they started questioning you and trying to tell you what you are and aren't you should've chucked the deuces. My SO has the same mix as you except his father is the one that's 50/50. When people try to talk all that jazz in his face he shuts that down. You define you.
good for him. i can learn from him.
 
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THIS IS A TEST. THIS IS A TEST. THIS IS A TEST OF LHCF's emergency preparedness. IS IT 2010? Why were either of these women allowed to leave the premises unharmed. LMAO..but no...:look:


OP, I am sorry this happened to you. Unfortunately, this happens all to often and I am sure that if you polled any of the many intelligent and articulate women on this forum, they have at one time or another been accused of "talking White." And I have heard, "No, but what are you really?" with reference to my ethnicity more times than I care to remember. It is unfortunate but ignorance is alive and well. All we can really do is procreate and educate carefully.

ETA:
Yes, I said procreate carefully. Way to many women are passing on the genes of men that just don't need to be passed on. Lol...the gene pool is declining. We need to all come to grips with the fact that some people really need to be losers in the great Darwinian race. LMAO...I'm not sayin'...I'm just sayin'.
 
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Girl, i have had worse.....complete strangers have made comments about both me and my children and i'm 'fully' black. I won't even bother repeating their crap on here.

Just keep stepping because they are ignorant fools whom are jealous and not happy with themselves.
 
i was at the store and these two women and black and white asked me why my hair is so curley and if its natural. I have 3c/4a hair. I said idk, thats how it grows. Then they asked me if i concidered myself black, i said yes. They asked me my nationality next. I told them im black and white mixed. The black lady then told me im not black. I said nothing. Just stared at her. She asked me why do you call yourself black when you are not? You are light skinned and have curly hair. I told her that i never noticed skin color untill a white person asked me why i talk white, and my this black girl came up behind me and told that white girl "leave my BLACK friend alone." this happend to me when i was a little. So after this short story the two ladies justed stared at me. I told them other people chose my race, not me. The black lady just shook her head at me. Then she said, if your fifty, fifty you cant call yourself black. I then told her that my mom is fifty, fifty and my dad is full so i am mostly black (even my mother conciders herself black because she syas that black people accept her more thne white people do.) then the white lady said no your not, not with that light skin and curly hair.....OMG! Why do i have to defend myself.....

Actually you DON'T have to defend yourself. Who you identify with is none of their business. Only you know your who you came from and for them to feel entitled enough to give you the 5th degree like you're on trial pretty much means that they deserve whatever the hell you served up to them after they said something like that!

It's over now but I would suggest that the next time someone wants to walk up to you and tell you who you should identify with, you might want to tell them that if they are really concerned about your mental state then they need to be worried about whether your black side will kick in and let their @$$es "have it"! :lachen:

If that's not your personality then a polite "I think you should worry less about who I identify with and worry about what's going on in your own life" might do the trick as well. :nono:

Either which way, I wouldn't have entertained the whole conversation but that's just my opinion. On the up side, if this ever happens again, you'll be fully prepared for it! :yep:
 
**********************************************************************
THIS IS A TEST. THIS IS A TEST. THIS IS A TEST OF LHCF's emergency preparedness. IS IT 2010? Why were either of these women allowed to leave the premises unharmed. LMAO..but no...:look:


OP, I am sorry this happened to you. Unfortunately, this happens all to often and I am sure that if you polled any of the many intelligent and articulate women on this forum, they have at one time or another been accused of "talking White." And I have heard, "No, but what are you really?" with reference to my ethnicity more times than I care to remember. It is unfortunate but ignorance is alive and well. All we can really do is procreate and educate carefully.

ETA:
Yes, I said procreate carefully. Way to many women are passing on the genes of men that just don't need to be passed on. Lol...the gene pool is declining. We need to all come to grips with the fact that some people really need to be losers in the great Darwinian race. LMAO...I'm not sayin'...I'm just sayin'.

GURL!!! TELL ITTTTT!!!!!! :yep:

Some people do NOT need to be duplicated! For real!!!
 
hmm..interesting. My husband is half black and half white..and he claims black..even on government forms. I argue with him all the time he can't claim black because he is mixed race..he always gets pissed off.
Anyway..i guess you are what you feel.
 
I don't even try anymore OP. I am what I am and what others think doesn't matter anymore at all. I am not getting into the "prove your blackness" thing. I understand you completely. It annoys me big time.
 
This is a right-wing thing since Obama. They are trying to strip us of our pride in having a black president. All the little boys who walk a little taller, all the little girls who dream a bit bigger... no. They want to stomp on that. Obama is NOT black.

That's what a friend of mine told me out of the blue. I made an innocent Sarah Palin joke (about shopping) and she jumped on me with all fours about Obama not being black.

Hahah.

Anyway. There's no such thing as race. There is no biological support for it. It's a social construction and a social identity. That's why on OFFICIAL government forms people themselves decide if they are white or black. It's one of those decisions you get to make for yourself.

Long ago, there were outside labels and ways to measure... if your mom was this, or if you were the color of this paper bag, etc. But in modern times those look foolish. Race can not be quantified because it doesn't exist.

You are black because you choose to be. It's your choice. You self-identify with that culture.
 
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