So I think I'm Being Stood Up...

C

chokolate miss

New Member
I'm at home on the computer, when I should be at Starbucks with my crush.

As of last night he said that he was still going to meet me there. He was supposed to text me today around five when he got out of practice. I have yet to hear from him.

I feel dejected. I know this post doesn't warrant much comment, but I just needed to vent. My feelings are hurt.
 
((HUGS))

I've been there before.

Personally, I really dont like when someone isn't a man of their word.

Are you going to call him? I dont think you should.
 
Yes I've been there before. Just be happy that he's showing his real character while he's still just your crush and not your boyfriend. :yep:

Or perhaps something came up. But either way, dont call him.
 
Let your feelings be hurt for a second, but don't do anything unnecessary.

Barring death or ridiculously exceptional circumstance, I would let it go. It's FAR too early in the game for this nonsense.
 
Aww thanks.

Yeah, I don't like that either. I understand that he is busy and the team has a big game coming up and all that jazz. But I specifically asked him if he still was going to be able to make it, and he said "definitely".

But now I sit here, and not at Starbucks. Why do men do that? Why not just say "no".

I did not call him, but I did text about 15 minutes ago. It read "tired?" I wish that I did not even send that. One, because he has not even responded. Two, I look extra thirsty.

I was really looking forward to spending time with him. He is the one who asked in the first place. Full disclosure-I approached him first, but he suggested that the two of us spend time together. I spent all day yesterday wondering what I was going to wear, worried about my makeup and hair. This was all for naught.

I realize the day is not over, but I should have heard from him by now. He was much more fun as a crush...
 
you'll be fine...as someone posted earlier, this is just showing his true colors. don't call him, let him call you and then make your decision to talk to him from there. Hope you feel better!
 
That's bad

I remember my husband stood me up last year and that really hurt my feelings. Maybe he has a really good excuse but don't let him call you later tonight to meet. Even though you like him you need to set the stage tonight of how you will allow him to treat you. If he calls reschedule for next weekend.
 
I have been stood up two or three times (by different guys) I always thought it was funny:lachen:

I don't understand why someone would come after me and ask me out and be all up in my face just to stand me up...oh well:rolleyes:
 
dlewis said:
That's bad

I remember my husband stood me up last year and that really hurt my feelings. Maybe he has a really good excuse but don't let him call you later tonight to meet. Even though you like him you need to set the stage tonight of how you will allow him to treat you. If he calls reschedule for next weekend.
Click to expand...

Thanks. I know that he may have a good excuse. He does have a very big game coming up soon, and they have been practicing hard core. I just wish he could have said "I know we were supposed to meet today, but I am just pooped!" LOL. Ok, he cancelled, but we could set up for a later date.

So if he does call I might think about trying again. I would be so afraid that he would do this though. Man, another one bites the dust!
 
Radianthealth said:
I have been stood up two or three times (by different guys) I always thought it was funny:lachen:

I don't understand why someone would come after me and ask me out and be all up in my face just to stand me up...oh well:rolleyes:
Click to expand...

You know when you put it that way...it is a little silly. I kinda wonder what he is thinking. Like is it malicious or just indifference or what?

I have a history of letting guys treat me poorly and I am trying to break that. I just have never been treated well by one, so I don't know what it looks like. This is normal for me, but it never feels good. I just wonder if I will ever meet someone who care about MY feelings and wants to do things that make me happy.

Sorry I'm Debbie Downer tonight:nono:
 
chokolate miss said:
Aww thanks.

Yeah, I don't like that either. I understand that he is busy and the team has a big game coming up and all that jazz. But I specifically asked him if he still was going to be able to make it, and he said "definitely".

But now I sit here, and not at Starbucks. Why do men do that? Why not just say "no".

I did not call him, but I did text about 15 minutes ago. It read "tired?" I wish that I did not even send that. One, because he has not even responded. Two, I look extra thirsty.

I was really looking forward to spending time with him. He is the one who asked in the first place. Full disclosure-I approached him first, but he suggested that the two of us spend time together. I spent all day yesterday wondering what I was going to wear, worried about my makeup and hair. This was all for naught.

I realize the day is not over, but I should have heard from him by now. He was much more fun as a crush...
Click to expand...

Your situation reminds me of mine last year. I remember him saying that I wore my hair up too much so I said you know what I'm gonna get it blow out and wear it down and look pretty, just for him to never call or show up:ohwell: The things we do to impress men:rolleyes:

At leats he's showing you his colors early..all I can say is look at his actions..the actions say EVERYTHING.
 
chokolate miss said:
Aww thanks.

Yeah, I don't like that either. I understand that he is busy and the team has a big game coming up and all that jazz. But I specifically asked him if he still was going to be able to make it, and he said "definitely".

But now I sit here, and not at Starbucks. Why do men do that? Why not just say "no".

I did not call him, but I did text about 15 minutes ago. It read "tired?" I wish that I did not even send that. One, because he has not even responded. Two, I look extra thirsty.

I was really looking forward to spending time with him. He is the one who asked in the first place. Full disclosure-I approached him first, but he suggested that the two of us spend time together. I spent all day yesterday wondering what I was going to wear, worried about my makeup and hair. This was all for naught.

I realize the day is not over, but I should have heard from him by now. He was much more fun as a crush...
Click to expand...

Ya know, I hate to get all "rules"esque about this, but I'll bet the bold is why he's doing this. He suggested that you 2 spend time together because it was effortless to do so...you had already done the work of opening the door. For some reason, men generally place more value on the things they pursue and work for versus things that are handed to them.

Honestly, even if he called, I would NOT go out with him. He would have to come hard to rectify the situation at this point.
 
locabouthair said:
Your situation reminds me of mine last year. I remember him saying that I wore my hair up too much so I said you know what I'm gonna get it blow out and wear it down and look pretty, just for him to never call or show up:ohwell: The things we do to impress men:rolleyes:

At leats he's showing you his colors early..all I can say is look at his actions..the actions say EVERYTHING.
Click to expand...

ITA, with the bolded. He is an athlete and normally I don't even look twice at them, but he SEEMED different. He did not have any girls writing on his walls saying outlandish things. He is kind of a homebody and pretty reserved. A lot of his traits are like mine. And yet, and hour after I text him, I still have no response

My cousin thinks that some of his boys got into his ear and pumped his head up. But why play me. This is just something else to add to the "what more can go wrong?" list.

So did the guy EVER call?
 
Update. So as I type this he decided to instant message me on Facebook. WTF?! Why not just call? You have a phone...and he is talking straight BS.
 
I got stood up by a guy once, and it does hurt. After that I made it a point that if someone planned to do something with me, and they weren't there to pick me up or meet me within an hour, and they haven't called me to explain otherwise, then I've made other plans and continue to have fun without them. That includes my husband, if he says he's going to be home at a certain time so that we can go do something and he's not home within a reasonable time, I'm gone, and he can either meet up with me, or get left behind, I don't wait around for folks anymore.
 
chokolate miss said:
Update. So as I type this he decided to instant message me on Facebook. WTF?! Why not just call? You have a phone...and he is talking straight BS.
Click to expand...

if u know its bs...let the whole thing ride...u know what doesn't feel good from the get go now....start looking for actions that do from other people
 
Divine Inspiration said:
Ya know, I hate to get all "rules"esque about this, but I'll bet the bold is why he's doing this. He suggested that you 2 spend time together because it was effortless to do so...you had already done the work of opening the door. For some reason, men generally place more value on the things they pursue and work for versus things that are handed to them.

Honestly, even if he called, I would NOT go out with him. He would have to come hard to rectify the situation at this point.
Click to expand...

:yep::yep::yep::yep:
 
Can't stand when males do stuff like that :ohwell:. If something came up, just tell me. Don't have me sitting there waiting for you looking dumb.
 
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So I know longer think that I am being stood up, I WAS stood up. So, at first he said that he did not want meet up, because he was going to be moving. So, he felt it would be hard on him meet up when we would not see each other for months. Alluding to the fact that he would want to continue a relationship.

Then he says that he has been sitting at home all day after practice and was just too tired to leave the house. Err, you could not tell me that?!

But in reality all he is saying is that he realized he was not getting any cookies, so it was not worth any effort.

So, ladies the saga is over. Thanks for the support. I was played. The end.
 
chokolate miss said:
Update. So as I type this he decided to instant message me on Facebook. WTF?! Why not just call? You have a phone...and he is talking straight BS.
Click to expand...

:nono:

He would not even get a reply. No going in circles, no listening to rationalizations, no trying to get him to man up. It's already off to a bad start.

NEXT!
 
Dammit. I wish many losers showed their true colors from the door like this one did... Girl you actually had it good :yep:
 
As per the other replies, I am so sorry you were stood up. However, at this early stage in the game, I do not believe you were played. In fact, I think in a sense, this is a good thing this has happened, because at least you REALLY know what type of boy he is. And then, he wasn't even boy enough to reply to your text...then he responds to you via FACEBOOK. How bytchen of him. And of all things, to leave you parked on Promise Street sitting idle...waiting.

If he knew you had a crush on him AND he did this, it is his loss. He definitely is not worth the effort in trying to make it up to you. Cut your losses and spare yourself and your heart. There isn't anything he can do at this point to make it up to you, because at this point, your time and your emotions have been wasted...on what? NOTHING. Your time is just as precious. So no, you were not played, in my opinion. Just simply stood up.

If you do decide to talk to him in the near future, and if he does decide to invite you out (because you have a crush on him is why I say this) again, I would probably reply along the lines of.... "let me get back to you on that" so the ball is in your court. Then, he would be parked on Promise Street PERMANENTLY.

My $0.02.
 
I spent all day yesterday wondering what I was going to wear, worried about my makeup and hair.
Click to expand...

awww...wasn't for naught....merely practice for the real thing...


So I know longer think that I am being stood up, I WAS stood up. So, at first he said that he did not want meet up, because he was going to be moving. So, he felt it would be hard on him meet up when we would not see each other for months. Alluding to the fact that he would want to continue a relationship.

Then he says that he has been sitting at home all day after practice and was just too tired to leave the house. Err, you could not tell me that?!

But in reality all he is saying is that he realized he was not getting any cookies, so it was not worth any effort.

So, ladies the saga is over. Thanks for the support. I was played. The end.
Click to expand...

you were NOT played..

you questioned it....
stayed at home..
didn't go chasing him
texted him ..once
and you checked in here
allowed communication w/him to get clarity
deduced his explanations were lies
and will have nothing further to do with him

you are VERY smart ..you liked a guy
who you found out ...RIGHT AWAY
was not worthy of your attentions ....

No.... not the end
but
N.E.X.T.!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

if you were played...trust me
he'd have been eating the cookies
 
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chokolate miss said:
So I know longer think that I am being stood up, I WAS stood up. So, at first he said that he did not want meet up, because he was going to be moving. So, he felt it would be hard on him meet up when we would not see each other for months. Alluding to the fact that he would want to continue a relationship.

Then he says that he has been sitting at home all day after practice and was just too tired to leave the house. Err, you could not tell me that?!

But in reality all he is saying is that he realized he was not getting any cookies, so it was not worth any effort.

So, ladies the saga is over. Thanks for the support. I was played. The end.
Click to expand...

Exactly! He just wanted to hit and he didn't think you'd be smart enough to figure out his motives. DONT call him. I have guy friends who sit around and laugh at the girls they run game on and the girls still give them time.
 
Lenee925 said:
Exactly! He just wanted to hit and he didn't think you'd be smart enough to figure out his motives. DONT call him. I have guy friends who sit around and laugh at the girls they run game on and the girls still give them time.
Click to expand...
^^^ this is exactly why chokolate you SHOULD NOT text him anymore after that last one!....step away from your phone. delete his number!...if he is sitting back laughing at the game he ran on you. Don't let him know it. Once you ignore him enuff....he's gonna start to wonder why his tactics didn't affect you.
 
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