*-*Single Ladies Support Thread!!*-*

I’m making a tonic as soon as everything comes in. Got it from someone I follow on IG. I’d share, but this is a Christian forum. It consists of honey, black seed oil, oil of oregano, cinnamon and turmeric. I normally have honey around but not enough for this. Supposed to good for immunity. I also got some mullein tea. Keep yourselves well Ladies.
 
Y’all, this man took me on an actual date. Every restaurant in the city is takeout or delivery only and he pulled off a sit-down meal. There was a bottle of champagne chilling at the table and his friend, the owner, served us. We were the only two guests in the entire restaurant.

We’ve been talking and virtually dating for about 7 weeks and finally decided we wanted to meet. He knew I was nervous about meeting in person, so he picked a restaurant that had been closed for the last four weeks. They deep-cleaned yesterday and just opened back up today for takeout and delivery.

It was seriously the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. I felt sooo special. No one in my life has ever treated me with such thoughtfulness and care. No one. Not my momma, dad, brothers, past bfs.. Idk what’s going to happen with us, but I am so thankful to have had this experience. Before y’all come :eek::oops::handslap:me, no I did not tell him all of that :lol:. This is a private LHCF moment :lol:.

As embarrassing as it sounds and as wrong as it is - sometimes when you get treated so poorly for so long you start to believe it’s all you deserve. I know it’s not the truth, but in those down days it gets hard not to believe it. Anyway, I really liked him before tonight and this date definitely got him some brownie points lol. Let’s see if he can keep it up.
 
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Kookookiwi said:
Y’all, this man took me on an actual date. Every restaurant in the city is takeout or delivery only and he pulled off a sit-down meal. There was a bottle of champagne chilling at the table and his friend, the owner, served us. We were the only two guests in the entire restaurant.

We’ve been talking and virtually dating for about 7 weeks and finally decided we wanted to meet. He knew I was nervous about meeting in person, so he picked a restaurant that had been closed for the last four weeks. They deep-cleaned yesterday and just opened back up today for takeout and delivery.

It was seriously the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. I felt sooo special. No one in my life has ever treated me with such thoughtfulness and care. No one. Not my momma, dad, brothers, past bfs.. Idk what’s going to happen with us, but I am so thankful to have had this experience. Before y’all come :eek::oops::handslap:me, no I did not tell him all of that :lol:. This is a private LHCF moment :lol:.

As embarrassing as it sounds and as wrong as it is - sometimes when you get treated so poorly for so long you start to believe it’s all you deserve. I know it’s not the truth, but in those down days it gets hard not to believe it. Anyway, I really liked him before tonight and this date definitely got him some brownie points lol. Let’s see if he can keep it up.
Click to expand...

Now that is a first date!! That is awesome!

Like you said, you will have to see how he does going forward.

I said this in another thread but this pandemic is going to show us women where the real men are at, how they respond to it and if they are someone worthy of our time. Something positive maybe can come from this.
 
MCMLXXXIV said:
How y’all doing?
Click to expand...
Doing ok.
Working from home and taking advantage of the time to finish my online degree and certifications.
Online dating is interesting it shows me that men literally forgot how to court women. They are usually just looking to get some.
Had an ex pop back, he was bored. And because he is not getting what he wants he is in a corner sulking somewhere and idgaf :angeldevil:
 
How are you ladies finding men you like on sites like OkCupid. I have been there for a while and I find that I'm hardly ever attracted to the men I have been shown so far. The tiny few that I liked can't seem to hold a conversation.
 
lavaflow99 said:
Now that is a first date!! That is awesome!

Like you said, you will have to see how he does going forward.

I said this in another thread but this pandemic is going to show us women where the real men are at, how they respond to it and if they are someone worthy of our time. Something positive maybe can come from this.
Click to expand...

So true! Even before the first date the way he approached virtual dating piqued my interest. We can definitely learn some things right now!
 
cinnespice said:
Doing ok.
Working from home and taking advantage of the time to finish my online degree and certifications.
Online dating is interesting it shows me that men literally forgot how to court women. They are usually just looking to get some.
Had an ex pop back, he was bored. And because he is not getting what he wants he is in a corner sulking somewhere and idgaf :angeldevil:
Click to expand...

Lol @ sulking somewhere. Online dating has gone ok for me. I’m picking them up and weeding them out fairly quickly. Had three in the beginning, two are staying strong. Well, kind of. I’ve sorta dropped one of the last two.
 
I'm single again!

Thanks to COVID19, I came to terms that I cannot see a future with my latest boo.

He's a handful (although a great provider).

On to the next adventure.

Im a little scared bc I'm 35 and now my Mom is in my ear (she liked him).
 
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yaya24 said:
I'm single again!

Thanks to COVID19, I came to terms that I cannot see a future with my latest boo.

He's a handful (although a great provider).

On to the next adventure.

Im a little scared bc I'm 35 and now my Mom is in my ear (she liked him).
Click to expand...

You made the right choice. Some of those great providers can give you the biggest headache. I discovered that I need a provider, protector, producer, planner, and problem solver. You can end up being very unhappy and lonely with a man who only provides. It’s just not enough to be a financial provider. Provision includes emotional support, love, companionship, etc. Our moms don’t get this. But they aren’t the one suffering with these guys. They want the best for us but don’t fully understand.
 
hopeful said:
You made the right choice. Some of those great providers can give you the biggest headache. I discovered that I need a provider, protector, producer, planner, and problem solver. You can end up being very unhappy and lonely with a man who only provides. It’s just not enough to be a financial provider. Provision includes emotional support, love, companionship, etc. Our moms don’t get this. But they aren’t the one suffering with these guys. They want the best for us but don’t fully understand.
Click to expand...
All of this!!!! :amen:
 
weaveadiva said:
@yaya24 How did the pandemic help you realize he's not the one?
Click to expand...

He does not respect my need for alone time. We live 16 minutes apart, so after staying with with for 1-2 days each time, I wanted to go home to recharge.

His house is really large, but if I would retreat to an empty room to work or just chill, he would question my intentions.

He thought I was being selfish when I would do my 1x a week virtual happy hours with my girlfriends.

I realized that he is extremely needy, and I sensed some future control concerns.

He said that I should have packed my dog and personal belongings and moved into his house for the duration of the pandemic... basically to play house. I was not interested.

I just felt smothered.
 
TrulyBlessed said:
Basura! By the way he failed the Bar. Beware of these clowns.

View attachment 458815
View attachment 458811
View attachment 458813

Heterosexual eh...
View attachment 458817
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Hold up first of all I got Carlton from love is blind vibes before I started reading his black man prize dissertation. Second I said I'm not concerned he gonna end up with some white girl who gonna a have a baby or 2 then drop his behind and take all his money.

No thank you I rather be alone than deal with that kind of mess. Beware of the clown parade. And a the lesson is women are always the prize.
 
yaya24 said:
He does not respect my need for alone time. We live 16 minutes apart, so after staying with with for 1-2 days each time, I wanted to go home to recharge.

His house is really large, but if I would retreat to an empty room to work or just chill, he would question my intentions.

He thought I was being selfish when I would do my 1x a week virtual happy hours with my girlfriends.

I realized that he is extremely needy, and I sensed some future control concerns.

He said that I should have packed my dog and personal belongings and moved into his house for the duration of the pandemic... basically to play house. I was not interested.

I just felt smothered.
Click to expand...

He sounds exhausting and like he wants everything on his terms. Was he like this before the pandemic? Or should I ask what was he like before?
 
The past week+ has been rough. Still is.

It appears I've been ghosted/dumped by the man I've been dating for 7 months. The last time I spoke to him, he said he wasn't in a great mood and I tried to be encouraging and upbeat. I couldn't delve in because he had to pick up his daughter, but that was the last time I heard from him. Regardless of calls and texts initially concerned about whether or not he was in any danger, I received no response back. I wasn't blocked - my texts would go through, calls would go through, but nothing.

I know he's not in any danger because he's had some online activity. Still interacting with his daughter and BM. And worst part.... unfortunately, we work together (we knew each other for almost 2 years before unexpectedly crossing that boundary...). While we are on WFH duty currently, the idea of returning to the office makes me slightly nauseous.

Has anyone had someone just disappear, no contact? It's odd to me because this seems to be so unlike him (I know, clearly I'm wrong lol) - I'm racking my brain for why this is happening.

Any advice on how I can distract myself/feel better would be awesome.
 
Girl, I’ve been trying online dating. I don’t know sis. There are some weirdos on here. I paid 30 dollars for okcupid and instantly regretted my decision. I was on POF for a day and a half and deleted the account after I saw there were over 20 messages in the inbox. I’m exhausted.

So, my dad passed away on March 23 and I’m struggling.... going through so many motions. On top of all this COVID foolery. I’m tired girl.

I thought I’d try online dating as a distraction from this intense grief. I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m sick of these men already.

I miss my daddy.

I’m feeling so much and I don’t know where to put any of it!
 
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