*-*Single Ladies Support Thread!!*-*

So much had happened since I last posted.

I’m getting flewed out to Paris in 3 weeks. It’s only for a weekend and his only “rule” is that I can only bring a book bag because he likes to be able to just get up and go.

It’s kind of random how it happened. Dude lives on the other side of the country so I dont see him often. He texted me on Monday asking when he was going to see me and I’m like uhhhh...when we make plans. He asks when I’m free and then says we should go somewhere...I’m like uh, ok. Then he asks me where I wanna go and I’m like...Paris. He looks up flights for when I’m free and sends me the money to book it.

I’ve known this man since middle school and it’s kind of wild to be randomly sliding out the country with him.

This ain’t the rev. He’s around but it’s obviously not going to work with us.
 
So that conversation was a crash and burn :lachen: :lachen:!!!

He did that let me text you before I call mess. Did I respond? Sure didn't. I waited for him to call and 2 hours later I get a salty text message asking what happened. What happened was I waited for you to call and you didn't :look: . He calls and I can tell that he's pissy, so I don't answer the first time LOL! He calls back, and I answer. He asks why didn't I call him. Uhhh because you were supposed to call me. . . . Then he goes on about how I'm going to "miss my blessing :rolleyes: " because I want men to do everything o_O . I said it hasn't been a problem before. Some men are about that life and some aren't. He says okay and then hangs up on me!!!!!!! :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: I got so much joy out of that whole exchange, from beginning to end. I was chillin and he turned into a princess. I won't deal with these prissy males!
 
Reinventing21 said:
@shespoison Wayamin, what happened with Rev. ????
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I can’t pinpoint one thing. I got the sense that he was just doing what he thought I wanted him to. That doesn’t sound bad but it felt off. That and he was so busy that every time I saw him it felt like we were starting from the beginning. We decided to be “friends” but then he invited me to the movies and was being all cuddly and held my hand time the entire time.

There is a lot of things going on for both of us right now...We get along well and enjoy each other’s company but I don’t think either us really see it as a good match. He’s a reverend and I’m a heathen.
 
ckisland said:
So that conversation was a crash and burn :lachen: :lachen:!!!

He did that let me text you before I call mess. Did I respond? Sure didn't. I waited for him to call and 2 hours later I get a salty text message asking what happened. What happened was I waited for you to call and you didn't :look: . He calls and I can tell that he's pissy, so I don't answer the first time LOL! He calls back, and I answer. He asks why didn't I call him. Uhhh because you were supposed to call me. . . . Then he goes on about how I'm going to "miss my blessing :rolleyes: " because I want men to do everything o_O . I said it hasn't been a problem before. Some men are about that life and some aren't. He says okay and then hangs up on me!!!!!!! :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: I got so much joy out of that whole exchange, from beginning to end. I was chillin and he turned into a princess. I won't deal with these prissy males!
Click to expand...
Stop responding to him. He’s not the prize but he’s not getting that memo.
 
Royalq said:
Hmm i proceeding with caution with this guy. He's a guy I met at work on a friendly basis. I wasnt really receptive at first but he seems eager to be friends with me. I know he has a crush on this other woman I know thats why im not thinking too much of it. He's totally not my type physically and is uber talkative. He seems to always want to know what Im doing later and invting me out. But Ive had male friends before who did just like to go out. I dont want to label him as tryna get with me and rebuff him but i also dont want to be blind sided if it ends up being true. We went to the gym together today and grabbed something to eat. Uber talkative lol. But whatever, we shall see.
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Wow so this escalated quickly.
We worked out a few times more and went out to dinner and I started catching a vibe that he liked me. At dinner he was telling me about himself and he will always come up with hypothetical situations of us “Dating”. Yesterday we went to the movies and then we stopped by a store for him to buy a shirt. And he was so touchy-feely and was all over me, but admittedly your girl put on a sexy little dress to catch his eye lol cause he kinda cute. He kept asking me for a hug and wanting to spend more time together but I had to go home. I planned on asking him eventually where this is all leading but we ended up having a long phone conversation last night. He basically admitted that he feels like I’m the one in that he can see himself marrying me in the future. I was completely caught off guard and I didn’t know what to say.

So here’s my problem, the sparks just aren’t there for me. I feel like I’m being very vain but facially he’s just not my type. His body is nice though and I do feel a bit of sexual tension around him. He is definitely a marriage minded, a complete and total gentleman, he’s very sensitive to my needs, I can tell that he will treat me like an absolute queen. He loves his mother to death, he’s very masculine and protective and I feel so completely safe around him. He’s very funny and goofy but he also gets serious. He’s a year younger than me but I don’t mind I feel very feminine and safe around him. He works full-time and he intends to continue his career. He checks out on a lot of things that I wanted in a man. I always always said that men figure out very quickly who they intend on marrying. I always said that I want to guy that as soon as he saw me he knew that he wanted me. And now I got it and I don’t know what to do with it. Ill also say that I’ve never been in a relationship before so this is all new to me. But the sparks just aren’t there for me and I’m wondering if they’ll ever be. This all happened in less than a week. But last night he was spilling his guts to me about how much he liked me and how he can see a future with me, and I just didn’t know what to say. I feel terrible for not liking him back the same way that he likes me and for an extremely vain reason. He’s not ugly he’s just not what I expected. I do get butterflies and nervous around him, and as I stated before the sexual tension is there. Its more like a slow uncertain simmer than a strong attraction. So I’m wondering if I’ll grow to like him?
I always placed facial/body attractiveness high on my list because I’m a very sexual person I want to feel extremely attracted to the man I’ll be with.
Has anyone else dealt with the situation where you didn’t quite find the guy physically attractive but he was very emotionally attractive??

ETA- so sorry for anytypos my phone is doing this weird thing where its doubling what I write
 
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@Royalq its kind of a be careful what you ask for. If your gut isn’t telling you to run, no yellow or red flags, just go out a few more times to see. If you don’t see any interest, then don’t waste his time. If you are emotionally attracted, me, personally, I would see where it could go. I get physical attraction, but it’s not high on my list for facial looks, versus body looks :look:

Have I been in the situation, yes.
 
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Saludable84 said:
@Royalq its kind of a be careful what you ask for. If your gut isn’t telling you to run, no yellow or red flags, just go out a few more times to see. If you don’t see any interest, then don’t waste his time. If you are emotionally attracted, me, personally, I would see where it could go. I get physical attraction, but it’s not high on my list for facial looks, not body looks :look:

Have I been in the situation, yes.
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Yeah I feel comfortable around him and he makes laugh. He treats me like a lady. We talk and text and I enjoy it. I guess imma pumped the brakes just a little so I dont feel too smothered and see where this goes.
 
@Royalq My $.02... if he's everything else except one thing, then it sounds like a no brainer. You can grow to overlook his facial features if everything else is good/ great. As I get older, it's hard to find EVERYTHING you want in a guy, particularly in the age of f boys. But if you have the majority and most of it is how he treats you and makes you feel, then that's a win. Getting a guy who's facially attractive but is a jerk won't make you happy. Eventually he'll turn "ugly" to you.

I say at least give him a chance. This is coming from someone who married someone who would've not been on my radar, but he's amazing.
 
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ckisland said:
So that conversation was a crash and burn :lachen: :lachen:!!!

He did that let me text you before I call mess. Did I respond? Sure didn't. I waited for him to call and 2 hours later I get a salty text message asking what happened. What happened was I waited for you to call and you didn't :look: . He calls and I can tell that he's pissy, so I don't answer the first time LOL! He calls back, and I answer. He asks why didn't I call him. Uhhh because you were supposed to call me. . . . Then he goes on about how I'm going to "miss my blessing :rolleyes: " because I want men to do everything o_O . I said it hasn't been a problem before. Some men are about that life and some aren't. He says okay and then hangs up on me!!!!!!! :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: I got so much joy out of that whole exchange, from beginning to end. I was chillin and he turned into a princess. I won't deal with these prissy males!
Click to expand...
These male people are something else. I once has a man tell me I was going to miss out on my blessings because I wasn't giving him any time. I just found out he got deported, I think my blessings were clear.
 
I have yet to post in here, but here we go...
I’ve been enjoying my life, dating and getting to know people. When I ended up in long distance relationship 3 months ago.

He seemed like a man with a good head on his shoulders, established and in his late 20’s (I’m 2 years younger). He was talking about a future with me and we agreed on meeting up in 3 months. Very sweet and charming. Shared his whole life with me (as much as possible).

Well all of the sudden he switched up, we went from texting/talking everyday to him disappearing randomly without a heads up and returning a couple days later with what sounds like a reasonable excuse. Still I would tell him I didn’t appreciate the disappearing acts and that if he was going to be busy to let me know beforehand so I wouldn’t have to worry and what not. He always apologized and said it wouldn’t happen again, but it did a couple more times. The last time was this weekend and I had enough so I blocked and removed him from everywhere.

Did I overreact? I don’t intend on ever talking to him again because I feel the damage is already done. But in my eyes is about respect. Plus the emotional rollercoaster it put me through was disturbing my peace.

How would you ladies handle it?
 
Browndilocks said:
^^^^ No you didn't. The fact that he played a disappearing act the first time and you found yourself having to explain why it wasn't cool is more than enough reason to kick that to the curb.
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Sosoothing said:
@lftiin

You didn't over react.
I would have blocked him too.
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ItsMeLilLucky said:
@Iftiin Sounds like someone I dated. You did good hun, ain’t no body got time for that foolishness.[/QUOTE
.
Click to expand...

Thanks girls, I appreciate the feedback. Can’t say it doesn’t hurt though. We spent so much time together on the daily that I somehow ended up attached. So it feels like I’m going through a real breakup. Feels like he love bombed me and was never really sincere. Can’t believe I fell for it. I opened myself up to him, telling him everything about me. I regret that part, won’t ever do that again.
 
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