*-*Single Ladies Support Thread!!*-*

Y’all gonna get tired of me talking about the good reverend if you ain’t tired already.

On my actual birthday (Saturday) he showed up with beautiful flowers and a card. I waited until he left to open the card. It was a gift card with a couple hunnid dollars on it to home goods, because he heard me say I needed to buy a lamp and some decor for my apt.

He wrote a beautiful 3 paragraph *** note in my card that left me with feeling punched in the guts, but in a good way :lachen:

I texted him to thank him and he says the gift is inclusive and he will take me to the store and help me pick out whatever and bring it home :cry3:I am overwhelmed with gratitude for his thoughtful gifts and kindness in general.

This morning, I received a call from one of my “friends” that came out for my birthday. He said that the good reverend pressed him. All he did was ask where he knew me from, which is what pretty much what everyone was doing the whole night. He then called my boo a nerd which made me really happy because it reminded me of the Ciara and Russell situation. Salty for no reason. He never expressed interest before and all of a sudden he wants to let me know how he feels. Too late, don’t care.
 
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A former FWB whom I haven't been with in like 3 years (though he tried to rekindle things) felt compelled today to tell me he's about to be a dad.

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Congrats to him! Not sure why he had to share....doesn't he have other real friends? :lol: Seemed so random....
 
Was it an April Fool's Day joke?

lavaflow99 said:
A former FWB whom I haven't been with in like 3 years (though he tried to rekindle things) felt compelled today to tell me he's about to be a dad.

giphy.gif


Congrats to him! Not sure why he had to share....doesn't he have other real friends? :lol: Seemed so random....
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I don't know what is happening in the universe, but my exes are coming out of nowhere with some BS.

A guy I dated for way too long, and the root cause of my trust issues :look:, emailed me asking why I'm following his ex-girlfriend on instagram.

First of all, I'm not following her and I don't even know her IG. Secondly, don't come at me on this childish mess because I will hurt your feelings.

It's weird because the tone didn't sound like him and the grammar was off, so at first I thought it was a hack, but then he mentioned the girl. After snapping a bit, he apologized and said it must've been a mistake, but he wouldn't make such an obvious mistake especially knowing my temper. Honestly, he would never confront me about anything because he knows that while I'm usually calm, I'm always ready to bite his head off.

I was also hiking up to a UNESCO site in southeast Asia when I saw that email :mad: the devil was trying to steal my joy today!

Either way, between him and the other ex stalking my IG right before his wedding, the universe better have big plans for me. I've managed to not do anything to embarrass them when I wanted to really wreck something!
 
Mr. C and I have been talking on the phone everyday and I love it. If I text, he answers right away. He's so cute, and sends me a pic of what he's wearing that day. He's really needy :laugh: , but the flip side is that I'm needy too :laugh: . Also found out that he is a PH.D doctor and he was so casual about it. Am I way out of my league? Yes. Am I going to let that stop me? Hell no :pulpdance:
 
Think of him as a regular guy. I know a couple of PhD and they usually don't want to be treated different because of the degree.

I'm glad you are having a good time.

ckisland said:
Mr. C and I have been talking on the phone everyday and I love it. If I text, he answers right away. He's so cute, and sends me a pic of what he's wearing that day. He's really needy :laugh: , but the flip side is that I'm needy too :laugh: . Also found out that he is a PH.D doctor and he was so casual about it. Am I way out of my league? Yes. Am I going to let that stop me? Hell no :pulpdance:
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BrownBetty said:
Think of him as a regular guy. I know a couple of PhD and they usually don't want to be treated different because of the degree.

I'm glad you are having a good time.
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Yes! Keep that man off the pedestal. He needs to know and feel like you are out of HIS league.

PhD? And? What's that got to do with you, your happiness and him taking care of you?

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lavaflow99 said:
Yes! Keep that man off the pedestal. He needs to know and feel like you are out of HIS league.

PhD? And? What's that got to do with you, your happiness and him taking care of you?

giphy.gif
Click to expand...

BrownBetty said:
Think of him as a regular guy. I know a couple of PhD and they usually don't want to be treated different because of the degree.

I'm glad you are having a good time.
Click to expand...

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Thanks y'all!!! I do catch myself thinking "what am I doing talking to this guy?" But most of the time I'm not in my head like that. It's hard because I was raised with the tit for tat/ "you better be bringing the same thing to the table" mentality. When I'm talking to him in the moment, I don't hesitate to be myself. I make weird jokes, tease him, and correct him when he's being a brat :lol:.

Speaking of Mr. C. . . . Some things came up this weekend, and with my work schedule, our date's been pushed all the way back to Thursday :cry4:. He's getting off early to have lunch with me before I go to work. We're having our full blown "we're official official" date that Sunday.
 
The good reverend and I had the “what are we doing” convo. I knew it was coming but I didn’t think it would be so soon.

He knows that I am not interested in ever having another ex boyfriend. So we are starting out with being exclusive and taking it from there.

I’m definitely excited but I also feel overwhelmed. There is something terrifying about getting exactly what you want plus more without any real effort.
 
A friend of mine is in another city doing something stupid with some man she shouldn't have gone to see in the first place. She flew all the way down there when he was being distant and cold for the entire month before the trip. She would complain to me daily about it and I told her several times to fall back and cancel that trip. She didn't listen.

So she gets there, they go to a party and head back home where he proceeds to give her the "it's not you it's me" speech and the whole "I can't give you what you want right now". She texted me at 2am to tell me what happened but said she was fine. Her texts were riddled with typos which told me she definitely was not OK. She said she had family in the area and would go over there.

Text her today to find out she still hasn't left his house thinking that her sulking and pouting will make him feel bad. Since it's not working she's decided she is going to ask his friend (a guy she met at the party) if he "wants to get dinner?" My thing is if the friend was into her and asked her I probably would tell her to go for it but 1. She's texting him and planning on asking him out and 2. This will not make the first dude jealous and I know she's hoping it will.

Anyway, I told this whole story because I cannot believe how common this is and how often women play stupid games like this only hurting themselves in the end. Don't women want to be happy? After listening to her go on and on I had to flat out tell her "Girl, stop being stupid. Pack your s*** and COME HOME!" I don't want to kick her when she's down but this is just dumb. She needs to stop.

***I didn't have anywhere else to post this and felt the single ladies thread was the place.
 
On Friday, I went to this Meetup event and there was a good-sized group of men and women. There was this sexy guy there that approached me and we talked for most of the night. The group decided to leave the first bar we were at and meet at a different bar. Some people in the group took Uber and some people drove. I drove and had parked a block up the street. He decided to walk me to my car before he went to his own car so I didn't have to walk by myself, which was nice of him.

Once we get to the second bar I started talking to some other people in the group and the guy started talking to some other people too, but he came up to me again and we pretty much talked for the rest of the night. We were having good conversation and he was being flirty. So at the end of the night he walks me to my car again and I'm thinking we're going to exchange numbers, but he didn't even try to get my number! :confused: It was so weird, especially since he made an effort to talk to me basically the whole night and seemed interested. :spinning:
 
@Damaris.Elle
I can see a lesson from that experience. We can’t allow anyone to take up that much of our time, especially if they haven’t put any coins in the slot machine! Lol
And this was at a meet up too?!?
You didn’t get to move around and meet other men... that seemed like “I can’t have you, so nobody else will” type of thing going on.

It reminds me of something I experienced. This man I would see was so fine!! He would stare at me and lock eyes with me, or he would stand somewhere I could see him. We walked by each other a few times, but he would never speak to me. I was starting to daydream about him! But after awhile, I was like if he isn’t gonna speak, I’m gonna just pay him no mind. He was occupying too much of my mental time and there were other men around. I could feel this man’s energy too. I felt like I was being seduced! Lol so I got myself together after that, and learned something.
 
@Damaris.Elle
Idk why he didn't ask for your # but you learned a lesson which is don't let one man occupy your time at an event with other men that you can get to know. Gotta get out there and mingle.

A couple of weeks ago I was at a couple of events that had nothing but men. They would slide up and try to talk all night. Nah bih... I would give them 5 -15 minutes depending upon how interested I was then I would move onto the next. It wasn't even a conscious decision just wanted to meet all the mens... lol
 
Damaris.Elle said:
On Friday, I went to this Meetup event and there was a good-sized group of men and women. There was this sexy guy there that approached me and we talked for most of the night. The group decided to leave the first bar we were at and meet at a different bar. Some people in the group took Uber and some people drove. I drove and had parked a block up the street. He decided to walk me to my car before he went to his own car so I didn't have to walk by myself, which was nice of him.

Once we get to the second bar I started talking to some other people in the group and the guy started talking to some other people too, but he came up to me again and we pretty much talked for the rest of the night. We were having good conversation and he was being flirty. So at the end of the night he walks me to my car again and I'm thinking we're going to exchange numbers, but he didn't even try to get my number! :confused: It was so weird, especially since he made an effort to talk to me basically the whole night and seemed interested. :spinning:
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Sometimes its just practice for them, thrill of the seduction or they're just innately charming. My friend is like this. Women thinking he's a standup charming gentleman and they have a connection when they meet in a bar, party etc and he's not interested romantically at all. Deep down I think he likes the idea of women thinking he's a great catch for his looks AND personality.

I'm conscious I'm quite charming so I actively become quite bro-ey to help dead any vibe a guy might think is there.
 
Damaris.Elle said:
Maybe he wasn't as interested as he made it seem? Or maybe he was expecting me to ask? Lol
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Maybe he wasn’t sure if you were as interested in him as he was in you? The other theories posted make sense as well.

I know this goes against LHCF teachings, but why didn’t you ask him to take your number? After that point I’d leave it up to him to follow up, but I see nothing wrong with asking. DC boo, who I posted about before, was a situation where we chatted all night and when I was leaving, told him to save my number, I said something like “do you want to get my number?” Or something like that.
 
sgold04 said:
Maybe he wasn’t sure if you were as interested in him as he was in you? The other theories posted make sense as well.

I know this goes against LHCF teachings, but why didn’t you ask him to take your number? After that point I’d leave it up to him to follow up, but I see nothing wrong with asking. DC boo, who I posted about before, was a situation where we chatted all night and when I was leaving, told him to save my number, I said something like “do you want to get my number?” Or something like that.
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Yeah, as I was pulling away in my car, I was thinking “I could have left him my number”. But oh well...I might end up seeing him around at another event... I’ve just never had this happen lol.

@Evolving78 and @BrownBetty At the second bar, I actually did get to talk to some of the other men there for a bit, I just wasn’t all that attracted to them. So when the sexy guy came back up to me and started talking again, I just went with it. But now that you mention it, him coming back up to me like that could have just been a way to ensure that I didn’t talk to any other men/give his ego a boost (“Haha, I’m stealing her from all these other dudes”)
 
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