*-*Single Ladies Support Thread!!*-*

I’m trying the earlier of advice to just not responding to men that want to text all the time. I mean this one guy claims he’s soooo interested but he’s trying to text me TO DEATH. He makes every excuse WHY he can’t call. He will call me once and then kinda allude to he is shy. He will say I make him so nervous because he hasn’t dated in awhile. He will call and get off the phone after about 20 minutes. He will say he doesn’t call because he doesn’t want to call when I’m busy. He says that it’s not the The doesn’t want to talk to me it’s just he works in a loud facility overseeing others. Blah blah blah.

I used the script once: I’m not much of a texter I prefer you call me.

I’m not saying this again so instead of saying it I’ve just gone ghost. He keeps texting texting texting. So annoying. We have a date planned for Saturday but that’s a no go for me.
 
gimbap said:
^If you're not explaining your time preferences to him, how would he know? I wouldn't go into detail, but I would say "I prefer to meet at xyz time" and expect him to come up with something suitable that works for both of us

But if you don't really like dude like that, yeah just ignore
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Ok. That makes sense. I figured with knowing what he knows, he told me 7 to let me know that it’s late. However, that comment was uncalled for.
 
@Saludable84 I read your post before it was deleted. Do you dislike him in the first place? His text seemed like a way of asking why 7pm was too late, but in a joking way. It would have came across as harsh, and maybe even argumentative if asked bluntly. Maybe the reason was none of his business, but I think giving a time frame would have been better than making him guess.
 
A couple friends and I were discussing the early dating stage and expectations on who initiates dates. All of us agreed that we preferred the guy to initiate the first.

Me and another friend felt the same was true for the second date (guy initiates). However, opinions were split on who initiates the third (from the guy again to the woman to it should be open on either end).

I'm curious as to what your take on this is, ladies. Do you have a preference/expectation on who initiates the 3rd date? And why?
 
tocktick said:
A couple friends and I were discussing the early dating stage and expectations on who initiates dates. All of us agreed that we preferred the guy to initiate the first.

Me and another friend felt the same was true for the second date (guy initiates). However, opinions were split on who initiates the third (from the guy again to the woman to it should be open on either end).

I'm curious as to what your take on this is, ladies. Do you have a preference/expectation on who initiates the 3rd date? And why?
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I never initiate the dates. If I initiate I feel I'm expected to pay. I feel that men love you according to how much they invest in you. They value what they invest in. So, I let HIM invest his time, favors, money, resources and more a LOT to me in the beginning to increase his attraction to me.
 
Ole dude finally called me yall. he said I thought you had blocked me because you didn't respond to my texts. I just played aloof. Oh I told you I'm not much of a texter. I never check my phone, but I always hear if it rings. lol He's playing games. He went back to texting me this morning. No go.
 
PrissiSippi said:
I’m trying the earlier of advice to just not responding to men that want to text all the time. I mean this one guy claims he’s soooo interested but he’s trying to text me TO DEATH. He makes every excuse WHY he can’t call. He will call me once and then kinda allude to he is shy. He will say I make him so nervous because he hasn’t dated in awhile. He will call and get off the phone after about 20 minutes. He will say he doesn’t call because he doesn’t want to call when I’m busy. He says that it’s not the The doesn’t want to talk to me it’s just he works in a loud facility overseeing others. Blah blah blah.

I used the script once: I’m not much of a texter I prefer you call me.

I’m not saying this again so instead of saying it I’ve just gone ghost. He keeps texting texting texting. So annoying. We have a date planned for Saturday but that’s a no go for me.
Click to expand...

There's always a reason for these things. If he's acting shady like that in the beginning it doesn't bode well.

Why can't people be real, stop the game playing, we're all supposed to be grown people.
 
Ipanema said:
@Saludable84 I read your post before it was deleted. Do you dislike him in the first place? His text seemed like a way of asking why 7pm was too late, but in a joking way. It would have came across as harsh, and maybe even argumentative if asked bluntly. Maybe the reason was none of his business, but I think giving a time frame would have been better than making him guess.
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I felt like he was playing a game to get his way. Originally, he told me he gets off at 3:30 but it’s changed for a day. Ok. Fine. I know I could have given him a time, but he bought up sex a couple of times (which I told him to stop) and I guess my gut was telling me that he was trying to push me to get his way. Also, I get the joke, but I took it as snarky and we aren’t even cool like that yet. He’s just been super aggressive and the last two times I said something, he just found a way around it. It’s too much of a coincidence in less than 2 weeks.
 
Saludable84 said:
I felt like he was playing a game to get his way. Originally, he told me he gets off at 3:30 but it’s changed for a day. Ok. Fine. I know I could have given him a time, but he bought up sex a couple of times (which I told him to stop) and I guess my gut was telling me that he was trying to push me to get his way. Also, I get the joke, but I took it as snarky and we aren’t even cool like that yet. He’s just been super aggressive and the last two times I said something, he just found a way around it. It’s too much of a coincidence in less than 2 weeks.
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Your gut is on point. Men aren’t used to women out here putting up boundaries. They will play along briefly. Some will get more tactile, aggressive, give up, or fall in line.
 
The good rev is still pretty amazing. If we don’t end up in a relationship I can see us being great friends. There is an ease with him that I truly appreciate.

We communicate daily and we always have plans for our next outing. He is always bringing up how we first met and I think it’s adorable.

Mandatory negative lol... he’s lowkey bougie af! He’s soooo serious about wine pairings and ate a hamburger with a knife and fork! I asked him if he used a knife and fork with pizza and he said yes. I just ate my burger like a normal being and just shook my head at him from time to time. This may not be a negative to others but for me it makes me want to roll my eyes to kingdom come.


Also, I no longer have the urge to jump his bones every time I see him. I’m so glad because it was very distracting and I prolly would have ruined it all.
 
I went out the other nite. This guy decides to shoot his shot as I'm leaving. He says something random and I make a joke, it wasn't about him. A couple of people heard and laughed.
This dude went from 0 - 1000 quick. He started cussing, his face was contorted, and he was clenching his fist. I was looking for my lyft when I looked up and saw him carrying on.
I calmly told him that he went from 0 -1000 and I wasn't interested in being a part of his Shenanigans. My ride comes and he rolls up very contrite asking if he could apologize with dinner. I told him no thanks and kept it moving.


He wasn't my type and I am not interested in crazy. I wonder how many women he has shown his crazy too and they overlooked it. He was too comfortable acting a fool within minutes of meeting me. Glad I never gave him my name.
 
Saludable84 said:
I felt like he was playing a game to get his way. Originally, he told me he gets off at 3:30 but it’s changed for a day. Ok. Fine. I know I could have given him a time, but he bought up sex a couple of times (which I told him to stop) and I guess my gut was telling me that he was trying to push me to get his way. Also, I get the joke, but I took it as snarky and we aren’t even cool like that yet. He’s just been super aggressive and the last two times I said something, he just found a way around it. It’s too much of a coincidence in less than 2 weeks.
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Okay, I see why you reacted that way now. In that context, his comment was out of line. Maybe he wanted you out late, get you a little relaxed with drinks to get your guard down, and then ask you over for sex. Disrespectful.
 
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