*-*Single Ladies Support Thread!!*-*

LivingDoll said:
I actually stay watching ID Channel, Fatal Attraction and shows like that! I just don't get that vibe from him which is surprising to me. I usually trust no kneegrow. :lachen::lachen::lachen:

I asked my sister and she doesn't get that vibe from him either. I think y'all are wrong about this one but I appreciate and understand the concern.
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Meet in a public place.

Just because you 'knew' the man years ago doesn't mean that he is the same man today. I don't know if I would deal to well with a man who just showed up at my door like that (skipping out of work?) if we were not in a relationship.

Why did his marriage break up?
 
LivingDoll said:
Yeah, I've been trying to decide if he is stalkerish or if his persistence is romantic? Does that make sense?
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You know this is wrong on so many levels... stay far away from that man! He just hand-delivered a huge red flag! How much crazy do you need to see, before you trust your gut?!?! He is on the rebound, and he is trying to move too quickly with you. Run!!!
 
Evolving78 said:
He is going to be so prepared for his seasoning lesson! Lol
You know I learned from men how to season my food. My mother is a great cook, but men have shown me how to make it just right.
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Girl he’s so proud of himself now :giggle: bless his little pale heart.


You know....now that I think about it my Daddy is the one that put me up on the seasoning game!

My Mom uses them but not complex layers of seasoning like my Dad does, men do seem to have a thing for multiple types of seasonings....some of them anyways.
 
BrownBetty said:
How much time was it between your last contact and when he showed up at your house unannounced?

I have hard and fast boundaries about men showing up unannounced so when it happens I nip it in the bud quick.
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I guess it had been about 6 months that I hadn't responded to any of his messages. He apologized profusely, and told me that he felt he didn't have a lot of options since I wasn't returning his calls. I nipped it in the bud. I told him I would call the police and file a restraining order if he did it again. He said he understood and agreed he wouldn't want anyone to do that to his daughters.

Sosoothing said:
@LivingDoll

He isn't exactly a stranger from what you say so if he were crazy I think you would have gotten that vibe from him long ago.

Men have driven long distances and showed up unannounced at my door (including DH) several times and turned out to not be stalkers. It's part of the chase (sometimes) and they strongly felt we belonged together at the time.

I would meet him if I had the time to spare.
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That's how it feels to me...he was and is chasing really hard. He has never been violent toward me or possessive of me in any way. I've known him 19 years (although we fell out of touch for the majority of that time). He feels like we belong together. He knows I don't like what he did. He hasn't done it sense.
 
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Ms. Tarabotti said:
Meet in a public place.

Just because you 'knew' the man years ago doesn't mean that he is the same man today. I don't know if I would deal to well with a man who just showed up at my door like that (skipping out of work?) if we were not in a relationship.

Why did his marriage break up?
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Absolutely. If I meet him it will definitely be in public. :yep:

From what he explained to me, there was a huge breakdown in communication and they grew apart.

Evolving78 said:
You know this is wrong on so many levels... stay far away from that man! He just hand-delivered a huge red flag! How much crazy do you need to see, before you trust your gut?!?! He is on the rebound, and he is trying to move too quickly with you. Run!!!
Click to expand...

His divorce was in 2014. When he showed up at my house last summer (2017).
 
LivingDoll said:
Absolutely. If I meet him it will definitely be in public. :yep:

From what he explained to me, there was a huge breakdown in communication and they grew apart.



His divorce was in 2014. When he showed up at my house last summer (2017).
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Are you trying to rationalize? You would think 3 years is a good time (if that person has done the work of acceptance, accountability, healing, and letting go). Do you believe he has done this? Today is my last day and I’m gonna be 100! If you have to rationalize, can only meet in public for safety precautions, is this dude really worth it? Now you can take what I say with a grain of salt, but a red flag has been shown.
When people show you who they are, believe them.
 
Evolving78 said:
Are you trying to rationalize? You would think 3 years is a good time (if that person has done the work of acceptance, accountability, healing, and letting go). Do you believe he has done this? Today is my last day and I’m gonna be 100! If you have to rationalize, can only meet in public for safety precautions, is this dude really worth it? Now you can take what I say with a grain of salt, but a red flag has been shown.
When people show you who they are, believe them.
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No, I answered the questions that were asked of me. As a forty something year old woman with plenty of experiences in tow, I don't feel I'm in danger. As I said up thread, I appreciate everyone's concern and will keep you abreast of the situation.
 
42626057_1969863533036057_6726653684505116672_n.jpg
 
gimbap said:
Ladies, do you really get approached more when you go out alone vs. out with friends? Or is this one of those dating urban legends?
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Yep. Everywhere I go.

It may depend on where you live. I am either in Harlem or BK.

I don’t even go out by myself anymore because I don’t want to meet anymore randoms. I just go to intimate hangs with the cool people I’ve already met. My network is now poppin.
 
I have a first date that I met at a mutual friend’s bday brunch in April.

I just googled it and it’s at a hotel bar. Should I feel a way or is that normal?
 
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