Also, I went to a dinner party that was nearly equal couples and single folks. Things got shady very quickly. The coupled women were so smug about it and the single women were hardcore trolling them! The married folks have been married for less than 5 years but they were acting as though they've figured life out entirely. One wife commented that she "just couldn't imagine dating today, I'd kill myself" and a single girl mentioned how miserable all the husbands looked and then a husband agreed with her! Another wife said she's so happy to have someone to travel with and so a single girl asked her when the last time she went on a vacation and the wife said 8 years ago :lol: Later, as people drank more, the husbands were trying to go out to bars with the single folks and the wives were getting pissed. It was so strange.

This is a hot mess! :lachen: I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall when this went down.
 
I'm sure this is nothing new but I'm noticing more and more that after a breakup or even a string of bad dates, my female friends go and do a bunch of emotional work on themselves. Guys...just drink more. Thus, the maturity gap keeps growing and the cycle repeats itself. Should women not retreat into themselves after a bad experience? Should men do it more?

Also, I went to a dinner party that was nearly equal couples and single folks. Things got shady very quickly. The coupled women were so smug about it and the single women were hardcore trolling them! The married folks have been married for less than 5 years but they were acting as though they've figured life out entirely. One wife commented that she "just couldn't imagine dating today, I'd kill myself" and a single girl mentioned how miserable all the husbands looked and then a husband agreed with her! Another wife said she's so happy to have someone to travel with and so a single girl asked her when the last time she went on a vacation and the wife said 8 years ago :lol: Later, as people drank more, the husbands were trying to go out to bars with the single folks and the wives were getting pissed. It was so strange.

That is hilarious! :lachen: sounds like a lit party :lol:

(To your first paragraph: I agree. Interesting (and sad) indeed)
 
@Evolving78 It sure does, as long as you're happy! People always talk about the freedom of being single and I think you've got to really take advantage of that while you can. Being single and doing nothing can be miserable but living a full life and just enjoying yourself while single and not having to think of anyone else's desires is the best.

@tocktick Right? Men come to the proverbial table however they are. No introspection, no "working on themselves." They're not out here reading books titled "Women Don't Love Men Like You" :lol: We keep correcting ourselves for the next guy but that guy hasn't done anything to make himself an ideal partner either. Similarly to you, I'm done working on myself for the sole purpose of dating. I am certainly not perfect (as the last few posts in this thread indicate) but I've realized that I'm in a better place than most of the guys I meet. I think the most valuable thing I've learned is to not get too invested or take dating too personally and to just keep doing whatever makes me happy or until the right person comes along.

@qchelle @shortycocoa The dinner party was soo good! I just sat back, drank the free booze and ate like $200 worth of filet mignon and lobster while cackling at the shenanigans. These parties are a monthly thing so I'm sure there will be more stories to tell.
 
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@Evolving78 It sure does, as long as you're happy! People always talk about the freedom of being single and I think you've got to really take advantage of that while you can. Being single and doing nothing can be miserable but living a full life and just enjoying yourself while single and not having to think of anyone else's desires is the best.
As a woman, it's better health wise to be single than in an unsatisfying marriage. We live longer and happier being single and living it up than being with a man who drags us down.

The more time goes by, the more I see how absolutely useless and full of it some men are.

Even the “good” ones are horrible. I’m not even talking about men I’ve dated. I’m basing it on my male friends and all the shady things I’ve seem them do.

I’m straight but it is very hard to like men right now.
Me too. Other than for my coloring needs, I don't see much use for them at the moment. :look: The sad thing is I think they want to connect, they just don't know how to.

I went to a dinner party that was nearly equal couples and single folks. Things got shady very quickly. The coupled women were so smug about it and the single women were hardcore trolling them! The married folks have been married for less than 5 years but they were acting as though they've figured life out entirely. One wife commented that she "just couldn't imagine dating today, I'd kill myself" and a single girl mentioned how miserable all the husbands looked and then a husband agreed with her! Another wife said she's so happy to have someone to travel with and so a single girl asked her when the last time she went on a vacation and the wife said 8 years ago :lol: Later, as people drank more, the husbands were trying to go out to bars with the single folks and the wives were getting pissed. It was so strange.

That is absolutely hilarious!:lachen::lachen::lachen:It's a great real life tonic to all the coupley social media posts.:look: If you don't filter it, it's easy to get into an emotional hole of feeling sad and lonely being single and imagining everyone paired up is happy.
 
Random thoughts:

1) Now that I'm done with the bar I'm sure MFT is going to push again for us to be exclusive. :look: He's about to be disappointed.

2) I feel like I'm going through another phase where American men turn me all the way off, and foreign men are more appealing. I went through this in college and I studied/interned abroad a lot then. I'm itching to travel again now for multiple reasons and men would be a bonus.
 
Random thoughts:

1) Now that I'm done with the bar I'm sure MFT is going to push again for us to be exclusive. :look: He's about to be disappointed.

2) I feel like I'm going through another phase where American men turn me all the way off, and foreign men are more appealing. I went through this in college and I studied/interned abroad a lot then. I'm itching to travel again now for multiple reasons and men would be a bonus.

Congrats on the bar!
 
Are yall keeping up with this black guy dating app serial killer? If my mother finds out about this I will never hear the end of it

Whoa! This is the first I'm hearing of this. Sounds like they know of three of his victims, including the one he murdered, but he says he's killed more. NY Times article below:

Dating apps were created to help people meet each other and maybe fall in love. But law enforcement authorities say a Connecticut man used them to prey on women, including a nurse in Queens he met through Tinder who was strangled to death earlier this month.

The police in New York have also linked the man, Danueal Drayton, to a rape in Brooklyn and they are investigating whether he might be responsible for other rapes and killings involving women he met through dating and ride-hailing apps. Mr. Drayton, of New Haven, has a history of arrests involving violence against women dating back to 2011, according to the authorities, and he has told investigators he is responsible for several other crimes.

Mr. Drayton, 27, was arrested last week in Los Angeles by a regional fugitive task force after the police in New York tracked him to a hotel room there, law enforcement authorities said. When Mr. Drayton was found, officers discovered he had raped a woman and was holding her captive after sharing an Uber ride, the authorities said.

He pleaded not guilty on Monday in Los Angeles County Superior Court to charges of attempted first-degree murder, forcible rape, penetration with a foreign object, and false imprisonment by violence. During the hearing, he was restrained in a chair that could not be seen by people in the courtroom gallery, but he could be heard muttering incoherently. A judge ordered him held on $1.25 million bail.

“If you look at the body of work, what just took place, it’s not much of a stretch unfortunately to think that there are going to be other victims,” Chief Shea said. “We need those victims. We need them to come forward for a lot of different reasons.”

But so far, no other victims have come forward, Chief Shea said.

The police in New York were seeking Mr. Drayton in the killing of the nurse, Samantha Stewart, 29, who was found in her apartment in Queens on July 17. Her brother discovered her body wrapped in a blanket in the corner of her bedroom. The medical examiner determined she had been beaten and strangled.

At the same time, the police said detectives in the special victims division were investigating a Brooklyn woman’s report that Mr. Drayton had choked her until she passed out and then raped her on June 17 after they met through Tinder and went on a date.

Tinder said on Monday it was cooperating with the investigation. “These heinous acts of violence are heartbreaking,” the company said in the statement.

Four days earlier, on June 13, Mr. Drayton was accused of choking an ex-girlfriend during an argument, according to a criminal complaint. The woman fled to her house, where Mr. Drayton forced his way in before her brother intervened, according to the complaint filed in Criminal Court in Nassau County.

Mr. Drayton was not finished, the complaint said. Three days later, he sent her a Facebook message: “This is just the beginning, first I cut your tires then your brake line, then I set your car on fire or blow it up,” according to the complaint. After receiving the messages, the woman told the police that she looked out a window and saw him slashing her tires.

30tinderslay3-articleLarge.jpg

Danueal DraytonCreditNew York Police Department
Nassau County authorities charged him on July 1 with strangulation, criminal mischief, criminal trespass and aggravated harassment. He was held on $2,000 bail, but was released on July 5 despite the objections of the district attorney’s office, which had not yet received paperwork detailing his previous convictions for similar crimes in Connecticut.

Ms. Stewart was remembered as “both empathetic and caring” by Kerri Scanlon, the chief nursing officer at North Shore University Hospital in Manhasset, where she cared for epilepsy and stroke patients. “She was also clinically superb,” Ms. Scanlon said.

Ms. Stewart was buried on Monday in Cypress Hills Cemetery, near her two-story house on 145th Road in Jamaica, Queens. Candles lined the stairway to her front door, along with a bouquet of flowers and a balloon attached to a lamppost that read: “A Special Person.”

Margaret Wright Stewart, Ms. Stewart’s mother, and her best friend, Margaret Foster, remarked on how the mother and daughter shared the same smile — wide and full of teeth. “It was the most beautiful smile,” Ms. Wright Stewart said.

Ms. Wright Stewart said her daughter wanted to meet someone and get married, but rarely spoke about dating. Ms. Stewart and Ms. Foster said they did not blame Tinder for Samantha’s death. Plenty of people, they said, met their soul mates through the platform.

“She just trusted someone who had bad intentions, and now she’ll never be able to recover from it,” Ms. Foster said. “But this isn’t the last person that this will happen to.”

Investigators in New York have begun a deeper investigation into Mr. Drayton and are looking for other victims, Dermot F. Shea, the chief of detectives, said on Monday.
 
I need more info. Off to google.

My bad for coming in here with half info

--------------

https://abcnews.go.com/US/police-investigating-suspected-killers-claims-murders/story?id=56912653

Police investigating suspected dating site killer’s claims of up to 7 murders
  • By MEGHAN KENEALLY,
  • AARON KATERSKY
  • EMILY SHAPIRO
Jul 30, 2018, 1:36 PM ET
danueal-drayton-booking-ap-jc-180730_hpMain_12x5_992.jpg
NYPD via AP
WATCHCross-country murder suspect is captured in California


Police are in the process of unraveling the extent of a potential serial killer's carnage, after he made claims about murders that have yet to be confirmed by investigators.

Danueal Drayton was arrested last week in Los Angeles and is set to be extradited to New York in connection with the murder of one woman and the rape of another - both of whom police officials said he met through online dating apps.

Drayton had been wanted for the murder of a nurse in Queens who was found dead in her home a few weeks ago, after she met Drayton on the dating app Tinder, New York Police Department officials said.

Now, police sources tell ABC News that Drayton is claiming he was involved in three murders in New York and as many as seven murders in total nationwide - though no evidence has emerged to validate Drayton's additional claims.

So far, New York police have only connected Drayton to the Queens murder of the nurse, Samantha Stewart, and a separate rape in Brooklyn.

He was arrested in Hollywood, California last week after Los Angeles police said he strangled and sexually assaulted a 28-year old woman he had also met on a dating site.



nyc-murder-suspect-arrest-03-kabc-jc-180730_hpMain_4x3_992.jpg
KABC-Exclusive
Murder suspect Danuel Drayton, 27, is arrested in the North Hollywood neighborhood of Los Angeles, July 23, 2018.


While the prospect of Drayton, 27, being involved in additional crimes has not been ruled out, New York police sources said that no evidence has yet emerged to corroborate his other claims.

"He is saying crazy things," one police official said.



(MORE: Murder suspect linked to string of crimes through dating sites: Police)


While Drayton claims he strangled a man in the Bronx, for instance, New York police sources said there are no unsolved murders in that area that fit his description. So detectives are checking for similar cases across the border in Westchester County, New York.

New York investigators now have a wide-ranging investigation underway into Drayton that involves the NYPD's homicide and sex crimes units as well as digital experts who are probing Drayton's online activity, including dating websites he may have visited.

Last week, NYPD Chief of Detectives Dermot Shea said that while investigating the Stewart murder, police were able to connect Drayton to a separate rape case in Brooklyn several weeks earlier.

The "common denominator in these cases -- one being a murder and one being a rape -- is dating websites," Shea said at the time. "This individual is known to us and believed by us to be using dating websites to meet women and victimize women."



danuel-drayton-2-ht-jt-180727_hpMain_4x3_992.jpg
@NYPDDetectives/Twitter
Chief Dermot F. Shea holds a photo of suspect Danueal Drayton on July 26, 2018.


Drayton was apprehended in North Hollywood on July 24.

There, he allegedly strangled and sexually assaulted a 28-year-old woman and refused to let her leave after a date, according to officials in the Los Angeles County District Attorney's Office.

When Drayton was taken into custody in Los Angeles, he was charged with attempted murder, forcible rape, sexual penetration by foreign object and false imprisonment, according to prosecutors.

The case was filed July 26. Bail was set at $1.25 million, prosecutors said. It was not immediately clear whether Drayton had retained or been assigned a defense attorney.

Like some other dating websites and apps, Tinder offers dating safety tips to its users.
 
@gimbap this is the article I just read. I've never used Tinder but this is scary! He could be on any dating app. And he looks just like the types up in my inbox now (the types I also left swipe :look:) I'm certain he's gonna go for an insanity plea. Those poor women - I think about a few of my friends going on dates and me doing our planned check in call/text and them not responding and finding out this happened. Just terrible.
 
This man had a history of arrests dating back to 2011. I'm sure he committed acts of violence against women even before then. Women's lives really mean so little. I'm disgusted — although unfortunately not surprised — that despite multiple arrests, he was still out and about and able to hurt and kill more women.
 
I don't have anywhere else to put this so I'm putting it in here. How come y'all aint tell me there was a Chic-fil-A downtown in FiDi? I'm talking to you @SlimPickinz @shespoison @AnjelLuvs @TwoSnapsUp I've never had Chi-fil-A and didn't even know they were in New York! Guess I know where I'm going for lunch.
Girl, you are late to the party!
 
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Are yall keeping up with this black guy dating app serial killer? If my mother finds out about this I will never hear the end of it

Just as I deleted bumble after 1 day.

Bruh. This is crazy. On top of someone I know being murdered in her own home and no one finding out until she didn’t show up to work for 3 days.

I had to call my friend and beg her to stop only me dating so much.
 
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This man had a history of arrests dating back to 2011. I'm sure he committed acts of violence against women even before then. Women's lives really mean so little. I'm disgusted — although unfortunately not surprised — that despite multiple arrests, he was still out and about and able to hurt and kill more women.

Showing up to all my dates like this from now on
gunshiggle.gif
 
I just came from a date and didn’t die.

He was really sweet. Almost too nice. It was weird because he’s like 7 feet and knows everybody. So I couldn’t be as “low” as I like to be on a date m. He knew the owner of the restaurant that I went to a million first dates at and I didn’t even go to that spot. Turns out he owns a couple other places in harlem.

He shouldn’t care too much. He saw me on dates himself :rolleyes:


A couple of people were trying to invite him out and he was all proud, talking about “ I can’t, I’m on a dinner date!”

It was mildly embarrassing but also endearing.

Today was really great for me. I feel like I got my mojo back.

Oh... I decided to give physician bae another chance. Mostly because he’s done with his residency and he is extremely generous.
 
I had a date with MFT tonight. Now that the bar is over, I got some things off my chest that I needed to say to him about my concerns. His new house wasn't far from the restaurant and he's been itching to show me so we went there because I wasn't done with the conversation. I liked it more than I thought I would. He asked me to be official with him but I said I needed more time. He knows my guard is up. We did fool around though. :look: I can feel that lusty feeling coming in. I'd been waiting for it. But I'm glad we've focused on an emotional foundation first.
 
I don't have anywhere else to put this so I'm putting it in here. How come y'all aint tell me there was a Chic-fil-A downtown in FiDi? I'm talking to you @SlimPickinz @shespoison @AnjelLuvs @TwoSnapsUp I've never had Chi-fil-A and didn't even know they were in New York! Guess I know where I'm going for lunch.
I've never had Chi-fil-A or Chipotle. I pass Chipotle all the time. I had Shake Shack once and wasn't impressed.
:hide:
 
I've never had Chi-fil-A or Chipotle. I pass Chipotle all the time. I had Shake Shack once and wasn't impressed.
:hide:
I feel the same about Shake Shack I don't really understand it. I like their fries but that's about it. I think I had Chick-fil-A maybe once when I lived in NoVa but it was years ago and I can't remember. But I love me a chicken sandwich so I have to get in there. I tried to go at lunch yesterday and the line was out the door. I tried to go after work and same thing. This morning I passed by and it was on a few people so maybe breakfast is the time to go.
 
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