*-*Single Ladies Support Thread!!*-*

I'm feeling better. Yesterday I didn't want to get out of bed though. I felt so stupid and dumb. Today I feel free. I'm not ready to deal with a new man right now but I know more of what I'm looking for. I compromised it a little bit with Classic Man (Imma start calling him Doofus now) but not the next time.

I said when I first went out with him that if it doesn't work out I'll learn a lot about myself and I did.

And I have the best sisters in the world. When they found out they were started arguing over who got to comfort me first lol. Then we got into the he ain't **** ranting session.

But what I don't understand is how older adults think he left an opening to communicate further? He was quite clear. He is moving on. I can't fight for something if the other doesn't want it too.
 
ScorpioBeauty09 said:
I'm feeling better. Yesterday I didn't want to get out of bed though. I felt so stupid and dumb. Today I feel free. I'm not ready to deal with a new man right now but I know more of what I'm looking for. I compromised it a little bit with Classic Man (Imma start calling him Doofus now) but not the next time.

I said when I first went out with him that if it doesn't work out I'll learn a lot about myself and I did.

And I have the best sisters in the world. When they found out they were started arguing over who got to comfort me first lol. Then we got into the he ain't **** ranting session.

But what I don't understand is how older adults think he left an opening to communicate further? He was quite clear. He is moving on. I can't fight for something if the other doesn't want it too.
Click to expand...

People are saying this?
 
qchelle said:
People are saying this?
Click to expand...
Yep. I don't get it. I think "Good luck in your search" was quite clear. He's still blocked. I did send a final text saying I liked him, was looking forward to getting to know him more but that I had concerns too, primarily his inconsistent communication. But that I wished him well. I have no more desire to have anything to do with him and I don't get why older adults are saying I might learn something and get a final conversation. How?
 
ScorpioBeauty09 said:
Yep. I don't get it. I think "Good luck in your search" was quite clear. He's still blocked. I did send a final text saying I liked him, was looking forward to getting to know him more but that I had concerns too, primarily his inconsistent communication. But that I wished him well. I have no more desire to have anything to do with him and I don't get why older adults are saying I might learn something and get a final conversation. How?
Click to expand...

No clue! That's weird to me, too.
 
ScorpioBeauty09 said:
Yep. I don't get it. I think "Good luck in your search" was quite clear. He's still blocked. I did send a final text saying I liked him, was looking forward to getting to know him more but that I had concerns too, primarily his inconsistent communication. But that I wished him well. I have no more desire to have anything to do with him and I don't get why older adults are saying I might learn something and get a final conversation. How?
Click to expand...
A final conversation to say what ? It's been said already. Unless something major happened what else is there to hash out. After everyone does all that, do they feel better or worse?
 
KammyGirl said:
A final conversation to say what ? It's been said already. Unless something major happened what else is there to hash out. After everyone does all that, do they feel better or worse?
Click to expand...
My question exactly. He's a man who expects sex after a point before a commitment. I'm not that way. We didn't communicate about it, I was willing to but he shut the door. I'm not going to beg someone to talk to me and why would I? It's not like we can reach a compromise lol.
 
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SlimPickinz said:
@KammyGirl he didn't pick the promenade? But corny ass Coney Island... lol I'm happy you laughed at him and he knew you were laughing.
Click to expand...
You should have seen how many crying laughing emojis I used. He wrote back question marks and I sent back more laughing emojis. :lachen: He called 3 times before I answered. Then he asked me what was so funny and that's when I told him I was not 15 years old and that wouldn't do. He was quiet for so long and then I said "ok, take care" and hung up before he could say anything else. lol
 
SG is talking about marriage more and more. I’m just along for the ride. I get the feeling he’s ready to settle down and I’m the “right place, right time” girl. Not sure how I feel about that. Not in a bad way, necessarily. I like him, I like his family, and he’s a good guy. Haven’t really seen any red flags besides the fact that he sucks at money management.

I mostly am questioning myself like, is this a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde kind of guy, is this all just the honeymoon talking, why are things going so smoothly, is this all just a fantasy/obsession, am I overlooking something because I like the attention?? It all somehow seems too good to be true. I keep waiting for the catch. It’s quite unsettling.

Maybe it’s because I’m leaning back. I literally do nothing except spend time with him, say sweet nothings back after he says them first, and give hello and goodbye hugs and kisses. That’s it. Rori Raye says the honeymoon lasts 3 months. We are past that. Maybe it’s a long honeymoon? Maybe “love” has blinded him (I have to stop myself from saying that out loud all the time!)?

At any rate, talk is cheap. Time will tell. There is a deadline in play, though he doesn’t know it. I’m staying quiet and keeping my eyes open. Trying to anyway.

Notice I post this in the singles thread, lol. I still consider myself single. The idea of “girlfriend” is not something I aspire to anymore.
 
rafikichick92 said:
SG is talking about marriage more and more. I’m just along for the ride. I get the feeling he’s ready to settle down and I’m the “right place, right time” girl. Not sure how I feel about that. Not in a bad way, necessarily. I like him, I like his family, and he’s a good guy. Haven’t really seen any red flags besides the fact that he sucks at money management.

I mostly am questioning myself like, is this a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde kind of guy, is this all just the honeymoon talking, why are things going so smoothly, is this all just a fantasy/obsession, am I overlooking something because I like the attention?? It all somehow seems too good to be true. I keep waiting for the catch. It’s quite unsettling.

Maybe it’s because I’m leaning back. I literally do nothing except spend time with him, say sweet nothings back after he says them first, and give hello and goodbye hugs and kisses. That’s it. Rori Raye says the honeymoon lasts 3 months. We are past that. Maybe it’s a long honeymoon? Maybe “love” has blinded him (I have to stop myself from saying that out loud all the time!)?

At any rate, talk is cheap. Time will tell. There is a deadline in play, though he doesn’t know it. I’m staying quiet and keeping my eyes open. Trying to anyway.

Notice I post this in the singles thread, lol. I still consider myself single. The idea of “girlfriend” is not something I aspire to anymore.
Click to expand...

I hope they kick you out of this thread like they did me!! :lol:

This was me about my SO in the beginning. I kept thinking to myself wtf is wrong with him, why is he talking about marriage so much?, why is everything going so smoothly? He pursued me aggressively (in a good way), totally open communication, great family, telling me was in love with me. He took me to look at engagement rings maybe..3 mos into our relationship. I kept waiting for the proverbial other shoe to drop.

I'd say our honeymoon phase lasted a good 6,7mos. Then his annoying personality trait came out. I told him it was unacceptable, and he actually worked on it and fixed it...and he has seriously not been doing this annoying thing since like January. It honestly amazes me cuz I truly thought I was gonna have to break up with him :look: If he wasn't the leader in communication in the relationship, I don't think I would've even said anything to him about it. Glad I did. Then a very stressful event happened to him around March...and I'm honestly kinda glad it happened, cuz I got to see how he handled things like that and I approve. According to the 2nd jeweler we saw, he'd planned to propose in May...but that event threw everything off...and again, I'm glad it did.

I def think my SO is in a 'right time/right place' frame of mind with me. And what makes me feel okay with that is my knowledge of his dating pattern right before me.

You have a deadline for what exactly? A proposal?

yall! feel free to kick her ass out! :lol:
 
I woke up to see that I had a Snapchat from this dude that I met online over a year ago!

He lives in Texas so he’s been working hard to get my attention now that I’m here but everything is always something about sex with him so I just ignore him.

When I opened up the snap he was laying down shirtless & making kissy faces in the camera , it made me so embarrassed & uncomfortable that I had to look away . Like really sir??
 
qchelle said:
I hope they kick you out of this thread like they did me!! :lol:

This was me about my SO in the beginning. I kept thinking to myself wtf is wrong with him, why is he talking about marriage so much?, why is everything going so smoothly? He pursued me aggressively (in a good way), totally open communication, great family, telling me was in love with me. He took me to look at engagement rings maybe..3 mos into our relationship. I kept waiting for the proverbial other shoe to drop.

I'd say our honeymoon phase lasted a good 6,7mos. Then his annoying personality trait came out. I told him it was unacceptable, and he actually worked on it and fixed it...and he has seriously not been doing this annoying thing since like January. It honestly amazes me cuz I truly thought I was gonna have to break up with him :look: If he wasn't the leader in communication in the relationship, I don't think I would've even said anything to him about it. Glad I did. Then a very stressful event happened to him around March...and I'm honestly kinda glad it happened, cuz I got to see how he handled things like that and I approve. According to the 2nd jeweler we saw, he'd planned to propose in May...but that event threw everything off...and again, I'm glad it did.

I def think my SO is in a 'right time/right place' frame of mind with me. And what makes me feel okay with that is my knowledge of his dating pattern right before me.

You have a deadline for what exactly? A proposal?

yall! feel free to kick her ass out! :lol:
Click to expand...

Thanks for making me feel better! You are pretty much describing our relationship thus far to a tee. Glad to know someone else has experienced this also!

The deadline isn’t so much for a proposal so much as it is for some things he’s said he wants to take care of before proposing so that he can be sure he can provide me the lifestyle I’m accustomed to (his words, not mine, lol). I’m really curious to see how and how quickly he accomplishes those things.

And no, nobody kick me out of this thread! I am a proud fence sitter until I take SG off probation! #singleuntilmarried
 
Yesterday Shy Boo hit me up asking if I had plans to go out and watch the game 7 I said nah and he was like well I'll order pizza and we can watch it at his house & I agreed. After the game we ended up watching Def Comedy Jam and we starting kissing and right as things were about to get heated his room mate put his key in the front door hahahahahaha. We had been drinking so I stayed the night but once we went in his room we just kissed and went to bed.
 
UniquelyDivine said:
I woke up to see that I had a Snapchat from this dude that I met online over a year ago!

He lives in Texas so he’s been working hard to get my attention now that I’m here but everything is always something about sex with him so I just ignore him.

When I opened up the snap he was laying down shirtless & making kissy faces in the camera , it made me so embarrassed & uncomfortable that I had to look away . Like really sir??
Click to expand...
Why are dudes so funny? I am the worst right now because everything they do is so hilarious and not in a good way. It's like are they not embarrassed? Where has this foolishness gotten them? He felt good about sending that snap? :lachen::lachen::lachen:
 
The holidays are approaching and I don't know if I'm ready. Lately I've been really good at staying positive but being single during the holidays is the ultimate test. I just want to cuddle in front of the fireplace and sip hot chocolate with a boo :cry3:. What are y'all doing to keep the holidays fun and cheerful even while rolling solo?
 
UniquelyDivine said:
I woke up to see that I had a Snapchat from this dude that I met online over a year ago!

He lives in Texas so he’s been working hard to get my attention now that I’m here but everything is always something about sex with him so I just ignore him.

When I opened up the snap he was laying down shirtless & making kissy faces in the camera , it made me so embarrassed & uncomfortable that I had to look away . Like really sir??
Click to expand...
KammyGirl said:
Why are dudes so funny? I am the worst right now because everything they do is so hilarious and not in a good way. It's like are they not embarrassed? Where has this foolishness gotten them? He felt good about sending that snap? :lachen::lachen::lachen:
Click to expand...

Some of the things men do is so corny :lachen:

Like, is that supposed to make me drop my panties now? :lachen:
 
KammyGirl said:
Why are dudes so funny? I am the worst right now because everything they do is so hilarious and not in a good way. It's like are they not embarrassed? Where has this foolishness gotten them? He felt good about sending that snap? :lachen::lachen::lachen:
Click to expand...


Damaris.Elle said:
Some of the things men do is so corny :lachen:

Like, is that supposed to make me drop my panties now? :lachen:
Click to expand...


Right!?!? Had me legitimately confused! It was soooo cringeworthy, they have no shame :laugh: like at least show me something juicy if you’re going to do that.
 
So let me ask a question? Is it considered a red flag if a man asks you what you do early on? Several men on match have asked me that within the first 2 messages. I cannot remember whether or not this used to bother me but lhcf has me paranoid about this now. Are they just making conversation or is there something else going on?

I feel like the old saying "if you have to ask, then you already know the answer" rings true here. Only because there are plenty of other men who have kept the conversation going without asking and these few who did stuck out to me. Again, I cannot remember whether or not this was something that I even paid attention to before.
 
SurferBabe said:
The holidays are approaching and I don't know if I'm ready. Lately I've been really good at staying positive but being single during the holidays is the ultimate test. I just want to cuddle in front of the fireplace and sip hot chocolate with a boo :cry3:. What are y'all doing to keep the holidays fun and cheerful even while rolling solo?
Click to expand...

Nope, Imma need you to keep it together. You have to keep me from going over the ledge. :lol:
 
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qchelle said:
I hope they kick you out of this thread like they did me!! :lol:

This was me about my SO in the beginning. I kept thinking to myself wtf is wrong with him, why is he talking about marriage so much?, why is everything going so smoothly? He pursued me aggressively (in a good way), totally open communication, great family, telling me was in love with me. He took me to look at engagement rings maybe..3 mos into our relationship. I kept waiting for the proverbial other shoe to drop.

I'd say our honeymoon phase lasted a good 6,7mos. Then his annoying personality trait came out. I told him it was unacceptable, and he actually worked on it and fixed it...and he has seriously not been doing this annoying thing since like January. It honestly amazes me cuz I truly thought I was gonna have to break up with him :look: If he wasn't the leader in communication in the relationship, I don't think I would've even said anything to him about it. Glad I did. Then a very stressful event happened to him around March...and I'm honestly kinda glad it happened, cuz I got to see how he handled things like that and I approve. According to the 2nd jeweler we saw, he'd planned to propose in May...but that event threw everything off...and again, I'm glad it did.

I def think my SO is in a 'right time/right place' frame of mind with me. And what makes me feel okay with that is my knowledge of his dating pattern right before me.

You have a deadline for what exactly? A proposal?

yall! feel free to kick her ass out! :lol:
Click to expand...

:lol: Hey! We need some more success stories around here. Y'all gotta come back some time and give us updates. I'm trying to keep hope alive :drunk:. This story is lovely. I envision things going smoothly with the right man. I'm a sucker for a good love story :cry3:.
 
SurferBabe said:
:lachen: I'm trying! I can't help that I'm in this boring town though. The holidays were lit last year because I was in a major city and there was so much to do. I guess I gotta put on a smile and hit up these coworker holiday parties solo. :drunk:
Click to expand...

Any cool friends to kick it with? I am planning friendsgiving, game night, christmas lights viewing with my people. I love love the holiday season so whatever the relationship status I try to go out and really enjoy it.
 
KammyGirl said:
So let me ask a question? Is it considered a red flag if a man asks you what you do early on? Several men on match have asked me that within the first 2 messages. I cannot remember whether or not this used to bother me but lhcf has me paranoid about this now. Are they just making conversation or is there something else going on?

I feel like the old saying "if you have to ask, then you already know the answer" rings true here. Only because there are plenty of other men who have kept the conversation going without asking and these few who did stuck out to me. Again, I cannot remember whether or not this was something that I even paid attention to before.
Click to expand...

I think asking within the first 2 messages is a little soon...it's like your answer to that is the determining factor of whether or not they decide to keep talking to you
 
Damaris.Elle said:
I think asking within the first 2 messages is a little soon...it's like your answer to that is the determining factor of whether or not they decide to keep talking to you
Click to expand...
I was trying to figure out whether or not it was just conversation since they didn't have anything else to say. But it just rubbed me wrong. I was like so now we gonna talk about work? What does what I do really matter? Alright. Those guys off the list. I mean they already were since I just didn't respond. But now I know how to move forward.
 
KammyGirl said:
So let me ask a question? Is it considered a red flag if a man asks you what you do early on? Several men on match have asked me that within the first 2 messages. I cannot remember whether or not this used to bother me but lhcf has me paranoid about this now. Are they just making conversation or is there something else going on?

I feel like the old saying "if you have to ask, then you already know the answer" rings true here. Only because there are plenty of other men who have kept the conversation going without asking and these few who did stuck out to me. Again, I cannot remember whether or not this was something that I even paid attention to before.
Click to expand...

It's appropriate during a networking event or work mixer not during the initial dating conversations. Unless it comes up organically.
 
shespoison said:
I have been abstaining from sexual activities and it making me crazy. How do people live like this :cry3:

Instead of a “hey bighead” text, I sent physican bae a “you look ugly” text because he changed his WhatsApp pic.
I want the D...but I know I shouldn’t.
Click to expand...


:laugh: :laugh: Poor guy, what did he say in response?


As far as not getting any D..... welcome to the club chile.
 
shespoison said:
I have been abstaining from sexual activities and it making me crazy. How do people live like this :cry3:

Instead of a “hey bighead” text, I sent physican bae a “you look ugly” text because he changed his WhatsApp pic.
I want the D...but I know I shouldn’t.
Click to expand...
The feeling will pass.. my cycle app let’s me know how long the urge will last.. lol I got three more days..
 
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