*-*Single Ladies Support Thread!!*-*

hopeful said:
Girl you are too sweet! A guy like that will see what you said as a challenge. He will be texting you again. Guaranteed! I would block or if you are curious about what else he has to say then let him text away and just keep ignoring him -- as if he were blocked.
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I keep them around for PMS time, when I need to curse someone out for no good reason:lachen:
 
Why are there grown men arguing after 12am about being players, not wearing condoms, etc? I'm sorry but I need a Riley from The Boondocks gif! Nothing wrong if that's the case, since it would be considered a lover's quarrel, but this must be some type of homoerotic, feminine energy going. Like is this how grown men behave now? They are loud, banging on stuff, got the windows open, keep saying "at the end of the day", etc.. I wish I would be with a man like that! I wouldn't look at him the same. They were too emotional and passionate. If a woman is sitting in the mist of of that, she needs some prayer.
I'm sorry about my rant, I just need this bum loser session these men are having to stop! They woke me up with that crap!
 
@TwoSnapsUp do your married friends ever try to hook you up with their husband's friends? I believe my chances of meeting someone I connect with are better now that many of my friends are married, so I make sure to attend their gatherings. I don't have married friends in my current city though. I'm also not uncomfortable around couples. My friends married great guys FOR THEM, but they aren't the kind of men I want, so I don't "envy" their relationships
 
sgold04 said:
@TwoSnapsUp do your married friends ever try to hook you up with their husband's friends? I believe my chances of meeting someone I connect with are better now that many of my friends are married, so I make sure to attend their gatherings. I don't have married friends in my current city though. I'm also not uncomfortable around couples. My friends married great guys FOR THEM, but they aren't the kind of men I want, so I don't "envy" their relationships
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No, I don't have the type of friends who would think to do this. Plus either their husbands friends are taken or they are men I wouldn't date anyway. Their gatherings are full of already made families. That's the community. Very family oriented. I realized the other day that my childhood friends have more marriages in their family than I do in mine. Marriage just wasn't stressed when we were growing up.
 
So as I'm typing up a little wrap-up about breaking up with bae #1 I just realized what to ask for Christmas. I want jewelry this year. I want earrings and a new name plate. Let me start laying the groundwork from now.

I broke up with him, then he told me no and internally I was like right answer but on the outside I said we're broken up. But we're back together but he's on thin ice. I told him this is his last chance and to let his actions speak louder than his heart does. Good intentions don't give kisses or hold my hand, IDGAF what you mean to do or how you feel about me. Show me or move over and let these other brothers step up!
 
My friend said she'd ask her husband about any single guys at his job. But she said that he said (prior to our convo) they're all fat. So we had a conversation about what constitutes "fat". I told her I can do a little overweight/chubby, but I can't do obese. He works with engineers and she said they all make great money. We'll see what happens.
 
shortdub78 said:
Why are there grown men arguing after 12am about being players, not wearing condoms, etc? I'm sorry but I need a Riley from The Boondocks gif! Nothing wrong if that's the case, since it would be considered a lover's quarrel, but this must be some type of homoerotic, feminine energy going. Like is this how grown men behave now? They are loud, banging on stuff, got the windows open, keep saying "at the end of the day", etc.. I wish I would be with a man like that! I wouldn't look at him the same. They were too emotional and passionate. If a woman is sitting in the mist of of that, she needs some prayer.
I'm sorry about my rant, I just need this bum loser session these men are having to stop! They woke me up with that crap!
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:lol: :lachen: I'm sorry but this sounds hilarious!
 
TwoSnapsUp said:
No, I don't have the type of friends who would think to do this. Plus either their husbands friends are taken or they are men I wouldn't date anyway. Their gatherings are full of already made families. That's the community. Very family oriented. I realized the other day that my childhood friends have more marriages in their family than I do in mine. Marriage just wasn't stressed when we were growing up.
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Have you asked? I'm sure their husbands work with single men. At this point I'd just ask around. You have nothing to lose.

Are you religious at all? Some of the churches with younger congregations have singles events.

This is kinda where I envy some of the Jewish women I work with (large Jewish community where I live and at my job). Their temple has singles events and matchmaking services. It is the first stop for single men and women who are new to the city. The Jewish community center here has matchmaking services as well. The Jewish women new to the company and city aren't single for long. I wonder why many of these local organizations for AA professionals don't offer these services. I can't think of one where I live that has singles events. Perhaps there is opportunity there.
 
SurferBabe said:
Have you asked? I'm sure their husbands work with single men. At this point I'd just ask around. You have nothing to lose.

Are you religious at all? Some of the churches with younger congregations have singles events.

This is kinda where I envy some of the Jewish women I work with (large Jewish community where I live and at my job). Their temple has singles events and matchmaking services. It is the first stop for single men and women who are new to the city. The Jewish community center here has matchmaking services as well. The Jewish women new to the company and city aren't single for long. I wonder why many of these local organizations for AA professionals don't offer these services. I can't think of one where I live that has singles events. Perhaps there is opportunity there.
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I've hinted it in the past. *shrugs. When we were younger, I was the one who always had a rotation. But they are the ones married now. Again, marriage wasn't stressed in my family. I have cousins my age and older who aren't married. Male and female.

At this point, I'm so used to being a loner. I'm in my late 30s, so not so 'young' anymore. A friend and I have talked about attending speed dating and other singles events together just for, but right now she is too busy running after her ain't poo ex.

I am also very introverted and quiet, so going out by myself isn't very fun.

I get noticed. I see men looking. I just don't get approached. I'm horrible at flirting.

Right now, I'm trying to focus on the just being happy in general. Unfortunately, every time I make progress something happens to throw me two steps back. I need to avoid triggers and just focus on myself.
 
^^^ I so know how you feel... I am in same boat... focusing on self and my needs... :perplexed:

Going to ride out this Match membership and deleting all free site profile's, not getting anything from them... Went out with one dude, ONCE, and he was ight, thought about breaking streak with him, but then he hits me with "cant wait to nut in you" talk, like FML!!!
 
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chocolat79 said:
My friend said she'd ask her husband about any single guys at his job. But she said that he said (prior to our convo) they're all fat. So we had a conversation about what constitutes "fat". I told her I can do a little overweight/chubby, but I can't do obese. He works with engineers and she said they all make great money. We'll see what happens.
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See, this is what I need! Married women with husbands with friends! Good luck :up:
 
AnjelLuvsUBabe said:
^^^ I so know how you feel... I am in same boat... focusing on self and my needs... :perplexed:

oing to ride out this Match membership and deleting all free site profile's, not getting anything from them... Went out with one dude, ONCE, and he was ight, thought about breaking streak with him, but then he hits me with "cant wait to nut in you" talk, like FML!!!
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Like how is this even remotely sexy? Did he think you would be turned on by that? oooo posssible chlamydia sounds like fun!! gtfoh bro
 
AnjelLuvsUBabe said:
^^^ I so know how you feel... I am in same boat... focusing on self and my needs... :perplexed:

oing to ride out this Match membership and deleting all free site profile's, not getting anything from them... Went out with one dude, ONCE, and he was ight, thought about breaking streak with him, but then he hits me with "cant wait to nut in you" talk, like FML!!!
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He's a troll! I refuse to believe a normal person that actually wanted to go out with a woman would say this. I refuse. Cannot be. What in the entire F?!
 
TwoSnapsUp said:
I am also very introverted and quiet, so going out by myself isn't very fun.

QUOTE]

I used to feel like this. I am very introverted. As if being introverted wasn't enough, I'm also shy. My shyness was almost crippling. Still kinda shy but better but always and forever introverted. And I love going out alone....now. Now it's the most fun than with anyone. I go wherever I want, when I want, can leave when I want, can order what I want. Just being alone is enough to draw people to you. Sometimes annoyingly so. I was going to try speed dating by myself until my friends got wind of it and wanted to tag along so I said nevermind. lol I still might try it just for fun.
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I was walking to the train this morning and some dude approached me talking about you look like you have something serious on your mind. I laughed because I was thinking about what I was going to eat and said "not really, I'm just hungry."

He shook my hand and introduced himself and told me to look for him on ig. His name was johndoeeatsgood. I thought it was a joke because I said I was hungry. It wasn't.

I don't usually talk to people on the street but he seemed normal and got my attention without being a creep.

I'm willing to check out how good he eats. :look: Actual food, get your mind out of the gutter.
 
LBoogie85 said:
What do you do when you're out alone? I don't have a problem doing an activity by myself (i.e. the movies, painting class, hiking, etc.) but I feel a bit awkward when I go to a bar/lounge alone, so I end up browsing social media on my phone or zoning out into space :look:
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I'm always on my phone with my head phones in. I also won't leave my house to travel far to eat alone. I stay within blocks of my place, and I live in a very family filled area.
 
LBoogie85 said:
What do you do when you're out alone? I don't have a problem doing an activity by myself (i.e. the movies, painting class, hiking, etc.) but I feel a bit awkward when I go to a bar/lounge alone, so I end up browsing social media on my phone or zoning out into space :look:
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I do activities alone but I also like to go eat by myself, go to bars/lounges with live music or jsut random $2 Taco Tuesday at a Mexican bar (which my fav place doesn't do anymore boooo). I used to be uncomfortable doing this and I would be on my phone but my ex told me that was a no no and I looked unapproachable or like I was waiting for someone. I was like well what's wrong with that? lol The very next time I went out alone every time I picked up my phone I had to remind myself to put it down. I ended up talking to the bartender, watching the television or even better when the weather is nice I'll stay in an outdoor seating area and just people watch. When I'm alone people smile at me more, people say hello and then engage me in conversation. And sometimes I really just want to be left.

My main alone time things are parks, book store, bar/lounge, brunch spot, or plays.
 
TwoSnapsUp said:
I'm always on my phone with my head phones in. I also won't leave my house to travel far to eat alone. I stay within blocks of my place, and I live in a very family filled area.
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Do you have a favorite place you normally wouldn't go unless you went with people? I say that is the best place to go alone no matter how far because it is some place you enjoy and will feel comfy. My favorite Peruvian place is in Midtown. I have been on several dates there, gone to a couple birthday celebrations too. It really is one of my favorite places but I hate Midtown. A total tourist trap and this restaraunt actually has a Brooklyn location but the menu is the best in Midtown. It is a very date night or party kind of place and always jam packed. The kind of place you feel awkward going alone. I was in the mood for some of that chicken and I took myself right on up to Midtown on a Saturday evening (early-ish before the big dinner crowd but still packed) and sat myself right at the bar, got myself a glass of Sangria and enjoyed my Mama Juanita's Chicken. :lol: It was a lovely experience especially because I wanted that chicken so bad.
 
KammyGirl said:
Do you have a favorite place you normally wouldn't go unless you went with people? I say that is the best place to go alone no matter how far because it is some place you enjoy and will feel comfy. My favorite Peruvian place is in Midtown. I have been on several dates there, gone to a couple birthday celebrations too. It really is one of my favorite places but I hate Midtown. A total tourist trap and this restaraunt actually has a Brooklyn location but the menu is the best in Midtown. It is a very date night or party kind of place and always jam packed. The kind of place you feel awkward going alone. I was in the mood for some of that chicken and I took myself right on up to Midtown on a Saturday evening (early-ish before the big dinner crowd but still packed) and sat myself right at the bar, got myself a glass of Sangria and enjoyed my Mama Juanita's Chicken. :lol: It was a lovely experience especially because I wanted that chicken so bad.
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Ma'am please add some names to the post. I need new date places for me and Bae #1.

Since I'm begging lol I'll add my fave restaurant. Trece near Union Square East, it's Messican and amazing!
 
KammyGirl said:
Do you have a favorite place you normally wouldn't go unless you went with people? .
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To be honest, if it weren't for meet up, I'd probably never leave my apartment. I do random MUs here and there if they sound interesting and to get me out of the house. Otherwise, there's a place a few blocks from me that I do go to, to eat alone. The employees there are younger than me, and there are only families and couples that eat there when I'm there. I don't even care for the food much. I just need to get out.

Even if I eat at a place with other people there, they are preoccupied with themselves and in groups or boo'd up. Noone is thinking about me. LOL.
 
TwoSnapsUp said:
I've hinted it in the past. *shrugs. When we were younger, I was the one who always had a rotation. But they are the ones married now. Again, marriage wasn't stressed in my family. I have cousins my age and older who aren't married. Male and female.

At this point, I'm so used to being a loner. I'm in my late 30s, so not so 'young' anymore. A friend and I have talked about attending speed dating and other singles events together just for, but right now she is too busy running after her ain't poo ex.

I am also very introverted and quiet, so going out by myself isn't very fun.

I get noticed. I see men looking. I just don't get approached. I'm horrible at flirting.

Right now, I'm trying to focus on the just being happy in general. Unfortunately, every time I make progress something happens to throw me two steps back. I need to avoid triggers and just focus on myself.
Click to expand...

That's the key. I've struggled with this on and off all year until I decided to get selfish and stop placing myself in situations that weren't empowering to me as a single woman. My coworkers invited me to a baby shower and I declined. There will be a time when I am able to feel okay in those environments even as a single woman, but I'm not there yet. I knew the mindset it would throw me into, so I sent a gift and well wishes, and spent that day at the ice rink doing something I enjoyed that made me feel good. Don't feel bad for putting yourself first.

And I believe loners can still find love, it just takes some creativity. That's what online dating is for. If men stare and don't approach, maybe get a friend to play wing(wo)man for you at parties and events.
 
SlimPickinz said:
Ma'am please add some names to the post. I need new date places for me and Bae #1.

Since I'm begging lol I'll add my fave restaurant. Trece near Union Square East, it's Messican and amazing!
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lol Pio Pio is the place in Hells Kitchen. It's on 42nd and I think 9th or 10th Ave. They have a Brooklyn location but they don't have the camarones cuzco on their menu and I always have to get that! :lol: Great place for date night.
 
KammyGirl said:
I do activities alone but I also like to go eat by myself, go to bars/lounges with live music or jsut random $2 Taco Tuesday at a Mexican bar (which my fav place doesn't do anymore boooo). I used to be uncomfortable doing this and I would be on my phone but my ex told me that was a no no and I looked unapproachable or like I was waiting for someone. I was like well what's wrong with that? lol The very next time I went out alone every time I picked up my phone I had to remind myself to put it down. I ended up talking to the bartender, watching the television or even better when the weather is nice I'll stay in an outdoor seating area and just people watch. When I'm alone people smile at me more, people say hello and then engage me in conversation. And sometimes I really just want to be left.

My main alone time things are parks, book store, bar/lounge, brunch spot, or plays.
Click to expand...

Someone told me this too so whenever I go out, I consciously try to put my phone away and stay in the moment. Thanks for the tips. I'll try some of these places out.
 
KammyGirl said:
lol Pio Pio is the place in Hells Kitchen. It's on 42nd and I think 9th or 10th Ave. They have a Brooklyn location but they don't have the camarones cuzco on their menu and I always have to get that! :lol: Great place for date night.
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Jo thats you? :lol: my homegirl LOVESSSSSS that place. I'll suggest this place next time since it's nearer to his work so he can't complain.
 
TwoSnapsUp said:
To be honest, if it weren't for meet up, I'd probably never leave my apartment. I do random MUs here and there if they sound interesting and to get me out of the house. Otherwise, there's a place a few blocks from me that I do go to, to eat alone. The employees there are younger than me, and there are only families and couples that eat there when I'm there. I don't even care for the food much. I just need to get out.

Even if I eat at a place with other people there, they are preoccupied with themselves and in groups or boo'd up. Noone is thinking about me. LOL.
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Everything won't work for everybody. I dine alone all of the time and it has never helped me meet men since most places I go to are full of couples and groups-- even the sports bars and happy hour places people suggest on here all of the time. Grocery stores have been dry for me as well. So time to try something different. I'm meeting up with a bike riding group and doing yoga downtown this week. I'm not doing it to meet men, just to get out and experience the city. Try at least one new thing before the month is over. You never know what could come of it.
 
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