*-*Single Ladies Support Thread!!*-*

I've been doing well with keeping Sundays as my me time. Today I got up around 9, made myself a big breakfast and put on Netflix. I finished around 10 and then I got up and opened Rori Raye's Modern Siren program on my laptop and let that play in the living room while I gave myself a facial and took a nice long bath. I got out, put on something silky, and sat in my room at my vanity/desk :look:and continued listening to the program while I gave myself a manicure and then set my hair. I got up just now to start pulling outfits for the work week and I finally check my phone and notice messages from Con Edison. Apparently the power went out about 11:30 and just came back on. I didn't even notice. :lol: Welp, since I have power maybe I'll start thinking about what to make for dinner.
 
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ivyness said:
He planned a weekend away for this weekend. I realised that if I was dreading spending 48 hours with a self absorbed ******* no way could I spend the rest of my life with him. Sorry for the short response I typed all the details out and my phone froze and they dissapeared.

ETA: and he again said I will never find anyone. Ok. I'm fine by myself.
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I had a man I had known for a very short time tell me this nonsense years ago. I responded immediately that I would rather be alone than with him. He was speechless. I guess he thought he was better than having no one.
 
LovinLea said:
Nothing really going on. Back to 0 prospects. Wondering if I should cast a wider net or take a break.
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What happened to the guy whose number you deleted? You aren't interested anymore?

Breaks are good. And sometimes much needed. I have to say I didn't really want to take a break but I felt like I should regroup since no one in my rotation excited me. Then I met the psychic and she said I needed the break too so that settled it. Lol It has been really enjoyable just focusing on myself, my friends, my family. I almost feel too busy at times and wonder where a man would even fit in right now. Then I know that when I meet someone I like he'll get in wherever he fits in. I've had several men flirt with me and talk to me over the past month or 2 but last night was the first guy I actually gave my number to. I haven't really felt like I wanted to include any of them in my world at the moment. Before I would give my number and see what they had to offer and if I was interested but now I'm more interested in myself. The guy last night was too cute to pass up though so he was a rare exception.lol I might not even want to be bothered with him either.
 
KammyGirl said:
What happened to the guy whose number you deleted? You aren't interested anymore?

Breaks are good. And sometimes much needed. I have to say I didn't really want to take a break but I felt like I should regroup since no one in my rotation excited me. Then I met the psychic and she said I needed the break too so that settled it. Lol It has been really enjoyable just focusing on myself, my friends, my family. I almost feel too busy at times and wonder where a man would even fit in right now. Then I know that when I meet someone I like he'll get in wherever he fits in. I've had several men flirt with me and talk to me over the past month or 2 but last night was the first guy I actually gave my number to. I haven't really felt like I wanted to include any of them in my world at the moment. Before I would give my number and see what they had to offer and if I was interested but now I'm more interested in myself. The guy last night was too cute to pass up though so he was a rare exception.lol I might not even want to be bothered with him either.
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I could focus more on my personal development.

That is a good space to be in.
 
LovinLea said:
I'm telling you the mothers running after kids were probably looking at you sitting pretty and missing the single/no kids life.
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I doubt it. Whenever they complain and I ask if they would switch places, I get blank stares. I know people say that not all couples are happy, but I believe there are happy couples out there, including my friends. They are living the lives they have always said they wanted.

I hope to have that of my own one day. I'm tired of the single life and would like to run after some kids, too. I look forward to it.
 
I officially cut off the guy I was 'talking' to. I told him I don't think we are on the same page and that when I am dating someone I prefer we actually go on dates (we went to the park and movies...thats it, and each time he tried to get me to come to his house). I also told him I feel I barely know him because he is very selective with what he tells me.

He was shocked and claimed that we are both adults and sex shouldn't be a problem. I told him I like to get to know someone first before we take it there and he said I sound inexperienced and that I don't know what I am talking about. He said he only takes girls he is sleeping with out and that dates have to be earned because thats relationship type stuff. He even said 'what makes you so special that I should take you out?'

I honestly was really thrown off by his idea of dating...he was okay with asking me to cook for him and to come over and sleep with him (which i did neither), but taking me out on a date is relationship stuff and needs to be earned. I am really hoping I don't meet any other guys with that mentality because it is very off putting. I think the fact that he is tall and handsome has girls doing whatever he wants, but not me.

Luckily I went out with a friend to a bar last night and we had a lot of fun and I met a nice guy. The only downside to the night was the creepy white european guys that would not leave me alone.
 
TwoSnapsUp said:
I doubt it. Whenever they complain and I ask if they would switch places, I get blank stares. I know people say that not all couples are happy, but I believe there are happy couples out there, including my friends. They are living the lives they have always said they wanted.

I hope to have that of my own one day. I'm tired of the single life and would like to run after some kids, too. I look forward to it.
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I'm single but a mom, so I was speaking more about the running after kids part. Ish is tiring, especially at a get together or party.

Re:bolded ---You're going to have all those things.
 
Nelli04 said:
....He said he only takes girls he is sleeping with out and that dates have to be earned because thats relationship type stuff. He even said 'what makes you so special that I should take you out?'
...
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TBH this guy sounds like a plumb fool :). An idiot. So proud that you spoke your peace, stood your ground, and kept it moving.

You can and will do much better. And trust that better is also being single with good friends, a career you love, hobbies you enjoy etc. When a guy like this marries, the woman gets worn out and exhausted, feels unloved, gets cheated on etc. He is looking for a mule or a mammy, not a wife or a partner. Keep moving forward and hold onto yourself and your standards. You did good.
 
Nelli04 said:
I officially cut off the guy I was 'talking' to. I told him I don't think we are on the same page and that when I am dating someone I prefer we actually go on dates (we went to the park and movies...thats it, and each time he tried to get me to come to his house). I also told him I feel I barely know him because he is very selective with what he tells me.

He was shocked and claimed that we are both adults and sex shouldn't be a problem. I told him I like to get to know someone first before we take it there and he said I sound inexperienced and that I don't know what I am talking about. He said he only takes girls he is sleeping with out and that dates have to be earned because thats relationship type stuff. He even said 'what makes you so special that I should take you out?'

I honestly was really thrown off by his idea of dating...he was okay with asking me to cook for him and to come over and sleep with him (which i did neither), but taking me out on a date is relationship stuff and needs to be earned. I am really hoping I don't meet any other guys with that mentality because it is very off putting. I think the fact that he is tall and handsome has girls doing whatever he wants, but not me.

Luckily I went out with a friend to a bar last night and we had a lot of fun and I met a nice guy. The only downside to the night was the creepy white european guys that would not leave me alone.
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Wow that Mask came off quickly! Lol glad you were able to see the real him in time! Block him!
 
hopeful said:
TBH this guy sounds like a plumb fool :). An idiot. So proud that you spoke your peace, stood your ground, and kept it moving.

You can and will do much better. And trust that better is also being single with good friends, a career you love, hobbies you enjoy etc. When a guy like this marries, the woman gets worn out and exhausted, feels unloved, gets cheated on etc. He is looking for a mule or a mammy, not a wife or a partner. Keep moving forward and hold onto yourself and your standards. You did good.
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Thanks, I am definitely keeping it moving. I did think momentarily that what I expect is not the norm, but realized he is just a loser.

shortdub78 said:
Wow that Mask came off quickly! Lol glad you were able to see the real him in time! Block him!
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Yea, I figured he was tired of pretending. Plus I was always calling him out on his BS. I honestly feel sorry for any girl who falls for him.
 
Nelli04 said:
Thanks, I am definitely keeping it moving. I did think momentarily that what I expect is not the norm, but realized he is just a loser.
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What you want may or may not be the norm. Doesn't really matter. What you want and deserve is just that, what you want and deserve. Stand your ground, in your femininity, in your beauty, in believing in love and abundance.

Nelli04 said:
Yea, I figured he was tired of pretending. Plus I was always calling him out on his BS. I honestly feel sorry for any girl who falls for him.
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Right. Whoever gets him will not be winning! She may thinks she is for a short period because he is a unicorn :rolleyes: because he is so handsome and all, but soon enough she will be lonely, begging for his attention etc.
 
Nelli04 said:
I officially cut off the guy I was 'talking' to. I told him I don't think we are on the same page and that when I am dating someone I prefer we actually go on dates (we went to the park and movies...thats it, and each time he tried to get me to come to his house). I also told him I feel I barely know him because he is very selective with what he tells me.

He was shocked and claimed that we are both adults and sex shouldn't be a problem. I told him I like to get to know someone first before we take it there and he said I sound inexperienced and that I don't know what I am talking about. He said he only takes girls he is sleeping with out and that dates have to be earned because thats relationship type stuff. He even said 'what makes you so special that I should take you out?'

I honestly was really thrown off by his idea of dating...he was okay with asking me to cook for him and to come over and sleep with him (which i did neither), but taking me out on a date is relationship stuff and needs to be earned. I am really hoping I don't meet any other guys with that mentality because it is very off putting. I think the fact that he is tall and handsome has girls doing whatever he wants, but not me.

Luckily I went out with a friend to a bar last night and we had a lot of fun and I met a nice guy. The only downside to the night was the creepy white european guys that would not leave me alone.
Click to expand...
Wherever guys like this come from I'm going to need them to go back there post haste never to return again. And their idiocy around dating and relationships isn't the most troubling and off putting thing to me. What bugs me the most is when they try to convince you that something is wrong with you. "You sound inexperienced and don't know what you're talking about" Like insulting you is going to make you agree with him and then drop your panties. It's sooooooo annoying. If he's a bum and just wants to screw around, that's cool and all for some other girl but not you. He can be a bum and realize you're not falling for it and then leave you alone and go find some chick willing to settle for his lame arse. Why does he have to dig his heels in? Any miniscule chance he had is getting smaller and smaller with the antics anyway. Good for you for getting rid of this loser. Delete and be sure to block lest you want a random 1am text in a few weeks when he's bored and lonely.
 
hopeful said:
Girl you are too sweet! A guy like that will see what you said as a challenge. He will be texting you again. Guaranteed! I would block or if you are curious about what else he has to say then let him text away and just keep ignoring him -- as if he were blocked.
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This. He would've been on block status after that make love to you text.

o_O

Is this really how it goes down nowadays? There's 100 damn frogs to every prince charming. Geez :lol:.
 
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