*-*Single Ladies Support Thread!!*-*

ItsMeLilLucky said:
@shortdub78 are you me? I find myself getting less caught up in romance as of yet. And I don't have time as well. This one guy keeps saying "I need to see you" but it hasn't happened yet. My schedule is not conducive to seeing people unless it's in the morning before I go to work and I value my sleep. My mom takes my son to camp and back and he's with me on my off days so you might as well say I don't have a sitter as well. And I don't want anyone coming to my house too.
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I tried to date someone else before, and that was very difficult. I told him upfront, I'm all about my children, and I don't have sitters like that. He seemed to not mind, but would be singing I miss you and you need to make some time... I can't be bothered with that.
And it's not just about bringing someone around the kids. I'm not gonna change how we do things to accommodate a man. I have set things that I do, I like things a certain way, and bringing somebody into my space is nerve wrecking and throws off the energy. I don't want a man questioning or observing anything in my home.
 
I broke up with my girlfriend and I feel so free.

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man @shortdub78 you just laid out my issues. I'm about my child and my money. In that order. I'm not changing our routine for no damn man. Either he gets in where he fits in or he fades to black.

I don't like that energy of males in my space either (not just physical). It takes a helluva lot of mental adjustment if I like someone. It's territorial and natural maternal instinct to protect our young and that includes the young' s routines etc.

I'm lucky to have 2 weekends a month off tho so if I want a casual date, it's cool but I find i prefer working on me and our home my free weekeneds.
 
I was with some friends and we were looking at dating sites, tinder etc on our phones and judging the guys. They are extremely picky, a lot more than me. I don't place too much emphasize on looks. The way I see it, I can be the looker for the both of us, he needs to hold it down in other areas. But the comments they were making about the guys..."lips too big, he has a big nose etc"..they were kinda sad. But when a mediocre at best white guy popped up, it was like yassss swipe right. Made me kinda sad :ohwell: It was funny because earlier this week, I got into it with a male friend because of comments he made about black women. Part of his comments were that black women find him ugly (he isn't) and that most don't even want to date black men (you and I know that's not true). Idk, maybe there's some truth to what he was saying.

Just venting/expressing thoughts
 
MzLady78 said:
I've started down a path I'm not sure I want to continue on.

If I'm gonna employ a maintenance man, I don't think this person is the best candidate. He's kind of selfish and having dealt with people since him who were way more giving, this could be problematic.
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Maintenance man as in an actual maintenance man or....

I think I know the answer I just want to be sure before I say what I was going to say.
 
OAN Hotep trying to get me out today spur of the moment on a FREE paddle boat ride. I decline. Then he trying to talk me out on a FREE walk tomorrow. First its gonna be mid to upper 80s. WTF I look like on a first date with sweat pouring down my make up and generally melting in the sun? Second, hes obviously not willing to make an investment in me. Decline. Hang up in his face and block him.

Mr Friend Zone has still not called with plans even though we talked last night and him saying he's excited to go out. I said what we doing? He said he'll let me know. :rolleyes: Its almost 10:30 am. He's not even friend zone no more. Block.

I'm not fooling with these middle age losers any more. They are being eliminated real quick. I'm not making time for time wasters and dead broke men. I don't need that energy floating in my space.
 
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DarkJoy said:
OAN Hotep trying to get me out today spur of the moment on a FREE paddle boat ride. I decline. Then he trying to talk me out on a FREE walk tomorrow. First its gonna be mid to upper 80s. WTF I look like on a first date with sweat pouring down my make up and generally melting in the sun? Second, hes obviously not willing to make an investment in me. Decline. Hang up in his face and block him.

Mr Friend Zone has still not called with plans even though we talked last night and him saying he's excited to go out. I said what we doing? He said he'll let me know. :rolleyes: Its almost 10:30 am. He's not even friend zone no more. Block.

I'm not fooling with these middle age losers any more. They are being eliminated real quick. I'm not making time for time wasters and dead broke men. I don't need that energy floating in my space.
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Good for you! Girl I would be too upset being in this heat on a date! And he sure loves free stuff!
 
shortdub78 said:
Good for you! Girl I would be too upset being in this heat on a date! And he sure loves free stuff!
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He sure does. Come to think of it, last weekend he hinted at a FREE art show. Didn't connect the dots til now. He's ooooolder too. Late 50s!! So he should really know what's up. He's broke as a joke. Probably looking for someone to fund his retirement since he apparently doesn't have a real job. He said he's an activist :rolleyes: ... these hoteps kill me.
 
MzLady78 said:
Yeah, I think I'm gonna hit the breaks on this one. I'd rather be frustrated from lack (which I REALLY am right now :wallbash:) than because of someone else's behavior. Trying to stay stress free in the man department.

Not to mention, revisiting my past never ends well.
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Yes sis! Stay stress free! I know it can be tempting but that temptation can lead us down the same roads we are trying to bury :nono:
 
KammyGirl said:
@MzLady78 Maintenance men are supposed to be stress relievers. If he's going to make you unhappy in any way even if that's annoyance he's a no go.
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You're right.

So, I decided to take myself to dinner and I ended up some place I have no business being, ordering friggin filet mignon and over priced cocktails. I only do this crap when I'm in my feelings, like I wanna treat myself since there's no one else to do it. :ohwell:
 
MzLady78 said:
You're right.

So, I decided to take myself to dinner and I ended up some place I have no business being, ordering friggin filet mignon and over priced cocktails. I only do this crap when I'm in my feelings, like I wanna treat myself since there's no one else to do it. :ohwell:
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Don't go broke but splurging on yourself once in a while is great! Makes you feel good. Go ahead and treat yourself and enjoy that steak! Now I want one. Lol
 
So something is in the air. I got 2 discounts on my new laptop. I got the special promotion price and the guy at the register threw in his employee discount (with his number on the back of a business card which I'm not going to use even though he was cute lol) I wanted to stay away from this laptop and had already picked out the -cheap- one I wanted. But when he came over talking about I could get it for half the price basically I said why not? He was like "just make sure I'm up there when you cash out." Lol
 
KammyGirl said:
Don't go broke but splurging on yourself once in a while is great! Makes you feel good. Go ahead and treat yourself and enjoy that steak! Now I want one. Lol
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:lol:

Yeah, that was the best meal I've had in a minute. The filet mignon was bomb and ended up being the perfect size considering I also had a baked potato. I'm done treating myself for a bit, though, the bill was $104. :spinning:
 
There was a man in my face telling me I was such a good mother. Fool you don't know me! Don't play on that! That's not an "in" for me. You see me in in this courthouse with these kids instead of having a sitter, or their father watch them...call me paranoid if you want to, but I'm not with that preying on single mother mess!
 
shortdub78 said:
There was a man in my face telling me I was such a good mother. Fool you don't know me! Don't play on that! That's not an "in" for me. You see me in in this courthouse with these kids instead of having a sitter, or their father watch them...call me paranoid if you want to, but I'm not with that preying on single mother mess!
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This guy told me he wanted to take me and my son out. I'm like "whoa, one step at a time."
 
MzLady78 said:
Fleming's. I should have went with my gut and checked the menu on my phone before I sat my behind down. :lol:

It's cool. I should be eating salad for the next month any way and try to drop a few before my Barbados trip.
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Im glad you enjoyed yourself. You deserve it! Think of this "drought" as a sabbatical! I know I am. My mind is clearer and I'm starting to develop super powers! It's been almost 8 months.
 
shortdub78 said:
Im glad you enjoyed yourself. You deserve it! Think of this "drought" as a sabbatical! I know I am. My mind is clearer and I'm starting to develop super powers! It's been almost 8 months.
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Thanks, girl!

I feel you. Honestly, the fact that I even realize that this probably a bad idea is a good sign. My other body parts aren't overruling my head for once. :look:
 
Soooo I got into a car accident, IN HIS CAR!!! I was making a turn on green turn yellow and the person adjacent decide to go straight instead of turning because my side of the street was busy. His car was totaled.

Immediately he was like you could have lost your life (it was really bad), go to the hospital, I only care about you. **** the car. It has been a couple of days but he has been so accomodating and stressed, I know he is. He is going to his family reunion on Tuesday and will pick up his BMW from his parent's house.

I felt so bad but his lawyer is saying a six figure settlement, easy. I feel horrible it happened on my watch. I am such a careful driver. I got hit by one of those moving trucks. It looked so bad. He just seems so chill about it. He said when I let you borrow the car, I took on the reponsibility for whatever happens, we just have to take care of you. I haven't been to work since. He has supplemented everything.

It is so weird for me. I am just waiting for him to vent. But he like it's all good, it's taken care of. I decided not to prod anymore. I am relieved but I am practicing humility, I never want to be beholden to or get comfortable to the point I am blind sided should he ever want to be mad about it. I would be so pissed though. The way he acts somewhat cavalier, he is hiding assets and I should trust him, but never take it for granted.
 
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