*-*Single Ladies Support Thread!!*-*

MzLady78 said:
Wow, that's great!

Shoot, I'm a New Englander, maybe I need to come out of my little shell. I want free stuff too!! :lol:
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Quoting myself cuz this is something I've been thinking about.

My problem with going out in Boston is that the Black community is only but so big, and the events are so basic and tend to be the same people at everything. I could go to a spot I haven't been to in a year today, and I guarantee it'll be the same folks.

And the events themselves- lordt. There is a Henny vs. Ciroc party currently being advertised on FB. Really?
 
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SurferBabe said:
What a crazy, fun, interesting weekend this was!

I decided that I'm no longer going to be the sad, single girl. I have too much going for me. So Friday night I found a history tour pub crawl and decided to join. It was fun! I was the youngest person there but I got to try bars I've never visited and learned a lot about local history.

After that I hit the town alone. There are a lot of tourists in my city this weekend so everywhere I went I met people from all over. I got called beautiful no fewer than 20 times that evening so that always feels good.

While devouring a burger at the bar alone, I met some out-of-towners. It was a mixed group-- mainly older. We chatted, laughed, and hit the rest of the town as a group. They covered my tab and everything. Even covered my Uber back home. They are wealthy New Englanders so I guess this was to be expected.

The next day they texted me to invite me to a concert about 2 hours away and wanted me to join. They got me a VIP ticket y'all. I had a blast. We went to a fancy dinner and stayed out partying until early morning. They got me my own hotel room and everything. We said our goodbyes and they invited me to visit them sometime.

Being so caught up in love, or the lack of, I didn't realize how good I have it right now. I'm independent and can make friends with just about anyone. I can go so far with that. I have control over that.

So my focus is on finding more quality friends and partaking in unique experiences. New people and new places. I'm leaving this old crap behind. I'm going to Canada week after next for vacation and I'm stoked! Life is too short to worry about crap I can't control.
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Yes! Your change in perspective makes me happy. Get after it, girl!

It=life/living :toocool:
 
SlimPickinz said:
He's right that some Black women have impossible standards. He wants bottom of the barrel women and he can find those in any culture. I hope @Shiks didnt give him anymore energy than he deserved.
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Anything specific?

**********
When someone says Black women, I attribute it to all of us. I agree there are some women that have crazy wants.... but when someone says Black women, I stop and pause. Maybe I am just defensive of us who want more for ourself than what society deems us to be worthy of.

Seriously, I just had this conversation last night. In my opinion, Black men (that date interracially) will demand a lot more from Black women than they would from our counterparts. I have actually had Black men tell me directly Black women are less desirable than other races so, for example, an Asian woman with no a$$ and nothing going for her will get a chance simply because she is Asian. The one I am speaking of was proposed to 3 times by Black men (quality, high paid dudes) but those same Black men would turn up their nose to a Black women.
 
SlimPickinz said:
Oh and ladies please use the yoni egg. Not only will it tighten your purse and cleanse your soul, it keeps your back muscles tight if you are doing the kegels right. My grandmother is currently suffering from weak back muscles and has now developed a loose backdoor. She can't hold anything in. Anything poop or urine.

I have clear quartz and rose quartz. I want to get a dark stone but I have other things to purchase first.
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Can't wait til I get mine to try. How many hours a day?
 
movingforward13 said:
I got mine from Etsy- $40.
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@movingforward13 Which one do you have? I have one all picked out. Off to etsy I go to see if they have it. Because the one I'm looking at is expensive.

Eta: It seems the one I want is only available at one place. Even on etsy the same seller is there and it costs the same. lol

@SlimPickinz What do you have and where did you get yours from?
 
movingforward13 said:
Anything specific?

**********
When someone says Black women, I attribute it to all of us. I agree there are some women that have crazy wants.... but when someone says Black women, I stop and pause. Maybe I am just defensive of us who want more for ourself than what society deems us to be worthy of.

Seriously, I just had this conversation last night. In my opinion, Black men (that date interracially) will demand a lot more from Black women than they would from our counterparts. I have actually had Black men tell me directly Black women are less desirable than other races so, for example, an Asian woman with no a$$ and nothing going for her will get a chance simply because she is Asian. The one I am speaking of was proposed to 3 times by Black men (quality, high paid dudes) but those same Black men would turn up their nose to a Black women.
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Right?! I mean god forbid we demand a man to have a job, ability to keep a roof and a damn car. Basic ish.

Ive heard them say we are out of shape blah blah... but get with a dough girl with 40 chins and working a check stand for min wage, praying for tips... cuz she aint black...

im also curious what our unrealistic expectations are.
 
MzLady78 said:
Quoting myself cuz this is something I've been thinking about.

My problem with going out in Boston is that the Black community is only but so big, and the events are so basic and tend to be the same people at everything. I could go to a spot I haven't been to in a year today, and I guarantee it'll be the same folks.

And the events themselves- lordt. There is a Henny vs. Ciroc party currently be advertised on FB. Really?
Click to expand...

These were white folks :look: I had to get in where I fit in. :giggle:

I feel the same way about where I live. I was going to a lot of the same places and after a while I got tired of seeing the same people. All of the festivals are the same and it is the same people every year with their cliques. Nothing came of it and I got so down about getting nowhere with building friendships from scratch. I'm venturing out more and taking advantage of all of the travelers that come here. People on vacation are nicer and more generous in my opinion. I'd rather have plenty of friends all over than few right here at home.

2 of the group I met were from Boston. They were of the sailing and skiing variety. It's not a type to easily run into organically but on vacation all types will be in some of the same locations. For example, few weeks ago I met a big time LA commercial producer at a juke joint but was too tired to accompany his crew to their next stop. There might be something to this. I'm going to run with this theory and report back with how it goes.
 
movingforward13 said:
Anything specific?

**********
When someone says Black women, I attribute it to all of us. I agree there are some women that have crazy wants.... but when someone says Black women, I stop and pause. Maybe I am just defensive of us who want more for ourself than what society deems us to be worthy of.

Seriously, I just had this conversation last night. In my opinion, Black men (that date interracially) will demand a lot more from Black women than they would from our counterparts. I have actually had Black men tell me directly Black women are less desirable than other races so, for example, an Asian woman with no a$$ and nothing going for her will get a chance simply because she is Asian. The one I am speaking of was proposed to 3 times by Black men (quality, high paid dudes) but those same Black men would turn up their nose to a Black women.
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I posted on FB about this divide between BW and BM being a sad state of affairs, and **** like this is exactly what I was thinking about.

I'm trying not to write them off as a group because if I do so, I'm screwed since I don't really have an interest in interracial dating. But I am so. effin. tired of them and their BS. I really am.
 
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SurferBabe said:
These were white folks :look: I had to get in where I fit in. :giggle:

I feel the same way about where I live. I was going to a lot of the same places and after a while I got tired of seeing the same people. All of the festivals are the same and it is the same people every year with their cliques. Nothing came of it and I got so down about getting nowhere with building friendships from scratch. I'm venturing out more and taking advantage of all of the travelers that come here. People on vacation are nicer and more generous in my opinion. I'd rather have plenty of friends all over than few right here at home.

2 of the group I met were from Boston. They were of the sailing and skiing variety. It's not a type to easily run into organically but on vacation all types will be in some of the same locations. For example, few weeks ago I met a big time LA commercial producer at a juke joint but was too tired to accompany his crew to their next stop. There might be something to this. I'm going to run with this theory and report back with how it goes.
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I figured as much, I was just more so commenting on how wack the scene is here. :lol:

But I'm going to make it a point to find some other events/places that may have a different crowd. Even though he turned out to be a weirdo with no social skills, I met that Harvard/Columbia grad I went out with last summer at an art show. That was new for me because if I'm keeping it 100, most guys I've dealt with would not fall under "good on paper". And an art show is not something I would usually attend, but I went to support my cousin.
 
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MzLady78 said:
I figured as much, I was just more so commenting on how wack the scene is here. :lol:

But I'm going to make it a point to find some other events/places that may have a different crowd. Even though he turned out to be a weirdo with no social skills, I met that Harvard/Columbia grad I went out with last summer at an art show. That was new for me because if I'm keeping it 100, most guys I've dealt with would not fall under "good on paper". And an art show is not something I would usually attend, but I went to support my cousin.
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The scene here is wack as all get out. It is a bunch of fancy-sounding festivals that are attended by the same ol' washed up cliques. So I get it. Many of the obstacles I've run into are my fault. I got comfortable with doing the same stuff and expecting a different outcome. Years later... not working. It's time to bury some of these places for good and venture out.

As for the bolded, shoot, if you can meet one, you can meet many more. You haven't returned to an art show since? You better go and mingle.
 
So I was told I wasn't properly acquainted with mine. Before you insert it take a couple of days with it to your heart to set your intention. I had paranoia today because it was drawing out other people's intentions toward me.

But ex's energy was familiar. He looked really good. Damn!
 
I finally blocked that dude who msg me every few months talmbout taking me out (unemployed and still no car?) and then disappears.

I peeped his timeline. His last 2 posts were of pics of a man ejaculating Skittles and another of a womam getting her salad tossed o_O

...so I guess im expecting too much from 40+ BM? :confused::spinning:
 
So I have a text message in my blocked messages folder from the last dude that I went out with that I liked but it didn't go anywhere. He sent it on Saturday asking what I was doing saying he would be in Brooklyn and if I wanted to meet up. He's no good for me and I know this but why am I happy that he's contacted me??? I won't message back but I need to fix my life. Being excited that some dude I know I shouldn't want messaging me is a giant step backwards. Let me get home and get back to reading Calling In The One.
 
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