*-*Single Ladies Support Thread!!*-*

keyawarren said:
Thanks. I booked on Tuesday and left on Wednesday. I called my mama from the airport :look:. I needed a break. I was able to do alladat because I've been trying to leave since March. I've been so tired. I had the time off already so I just up and left. Totally worth it. Some of myfriends didn't eben notice the absence :lol:

I can't wait to go again next year. I want to hike the trails in the rain forest. Btw, I stayed in the hotel across the street from the one you suggested! I walked past it on my way to Walgreens :yep:. Thanks for the insight.
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dang ypu was not playin! glad you had fun!
 
I've been thinking about some stuff lately and since today is going to be a chill workday I might pop in here a few times.

Has anyone noticed a difference between the advice given to you as a single woman by men and women who have been married/committed a long time vs. those married/committed a short time? I feel like a receive more judgement from those married a short time. On the flip side-- my stepmother, older half-sister, family friends, and older cousins who have been married for 25+ years have a very different viewpoint. They tell me not to rush to get married, learn to enjoy life as a single woman, have fun, and be patient. While they enjoy being married and having a family, they've shared that if they had access to the same opportunities as my generation, they probably would have waited longer. Some of the married short-term family members and acquaintances nitpick at what I and other women of my generation must be doing wrong. Could be a generational thing however.
 
My engine is leaking oil (known problem- waiting for Honda to give me a new engine for free). Lee came over, gave my car an oil change- which consisted of him taking my wheel off and getting underneath the car. Turns out the leak is pretty bad- I had the equivalent of one quart left of my car when there should have been 5. I just changed the oil changed 60 days ago at Jiffy Lube too and it wasn't scheduled for another change for another 2000 miles.

But any way, made me again think dating wise, do men of today know how to change oil and fix cars (basic stuff). They "want" a woman who can cook and clean, what can they do vice versa?
When he was done, I gave him a bottle of cold water, big hug, like 20 smooches and told him how happy I was. Then sent him home (he came over just for that).

Edit: typo
 
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movingforward13 said:
My engine is leaking oil (known problem- waiting for Honda to give me a new engine for free). Lee came over, gave my car an oil change- which consisted of him taking my wheel off and getting underneath the car. Turns out the leak is pretty bad- I had the equivalent of one quart left of my car when there should have been 5. I just for the oil changed 60 days ago at Jiffy Lube too and it wasn't scheduled for another change for another 2000 miles.

But any way, made me again think dating wise, do men of today know how to change oil and fix cars (basic stuff). They "want" a woman who can cook and clean, what can they do vice versa?
When he was done, I gave him a bottle of cold water, big hug, like 20 smooches and told him how happy I was. Then sent him home (he came over just for that).
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No they dont.
none of them i have ever dated since ive been single (in our 40s) have known the basics to automotive repair besides changing a tire. i tend to date geeks and nerds though so that is a different population.

if ive had probs with my gadgets and devices they are right there to fix.
 
movingforward13 said:
My engine is leaking oil (known problem- waiting for Honda to give me a new engine for free). Lee came over, gave my car an oil change- which consisted of him taking my wheel off and getting underneath the car. Turns out the leak is pretty bad- I had the equivalent of one quart left of my car when there should have been 5. I just for the oil changed 60 days ago at Jiffy Lube too and it wasn't scheduled for another change for another 2000 miles.

But any way, made me again think dating wise, do men of today know how to change oil and fix cars (basic stuff). They "want" a woman who can cook and clean, what can they do vice versa?
When he was done, I gave him a bottle of cold water, big hug, like 20 smooches and told him how happy I was. Then sent him home (he came over just for that).
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There are some that still do, I've dated quite a few and current SO knows these things. Every male in my family can do the typical male stuff (fix cars, things around the house, etc), I'm glad its not a lost art. I always say a man has to either know how to do these things for me or have enough money to pay someone to do these things for me. I'm glad you know someone that can help out when needed, yayyy Lee.
 
SurferBabe said:
I've been thinking about some stuff lately and since today is going to be a chill workday I might pop in here a few times.

Has anyone noticed a difference between the advice given to you as a single woman by men and women who have been married/committed a long time vs. those married/committed a short time? I feel like a receive more judgement from those married a short time. On the flip side-- my stepmother, older half-sister, family friends, and older cousins who have been married for 25+ years have a very different viewpoint. They tell me not to rush to get married, learn to enjoy life as a single woman, have fun, and be patient. While they enjoy being married and having a family, they've shared that if they had access to the same opportunities as my generation, they probably would have waited longer. Some of the married short-term family members and acquaintances nitpick at what I and other women of my generation must be doing wrong. Could be a generational thing however.
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It's complete'y opposite with me. Those married less than 5 years don't bother me about being single or want the best for me. They are more encouraging.

Those who are judgmental towards me have been married a while.
 
I need to spend more time in this thread. Dating is so frustrating for me. I hate it. But I'm at the point where I'm not meeting people in my normal life. I just started using match and it is really telling. As I suspected, men in this area aren't into black women, but I'm going to try to stay optimistic. Why oh why is it so hard to meet a normal, educated man?
 
Weird dude from okc sent me a crazy long message on okc saying he's sorry he came on too strong. He was excited about me and he may have gotten creepy. I agreed. We ended up meeting up after work for happy hour. Why oh why did I agree to that? He spent the whole time talking about his ulcerative colitis in great detail. Yuck! The worst part is though that he told the tales of his bowels so unenthused and deadpan. At one point I had to tell him to speak up because he was getting lower and lower like he wasn't even speaking to me. It's official. We will not be a thing. I told him he was a nice guy but we aren't a match and let's go our separate ways. Hopefully he goes away now.
 
KammyGirl said:
Weird dude from okc sent me a crazy long message on okc saying he's sorry he came on too strong. He was excited about me and he may have gotten creepy. I agreed. We ended up meeting up after work for happy hour. Why oh why did I agree to that? He spent the whole time talking about his ulcerative colitis in great detail. Yuck! The worst part is though that he told the tales of his bowels so unenthused and deadpan. At one point I had to tell him to speak up because he was getting lower and lower like he wasn't even speaking to me. It's official. We will not be a thing. I told him he was a nice guy but we aren't a match and let's go our separate ways. Hopefully he goes away now.
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What a loony toon. He must not get out much.
 
NinaShamone said:
What a loony toon. He must not get out much.
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Idk but I was not amused. He was like "every time I s*** there would be blood and I had to know where the bathroom was". My face was like that Urkel confused gif. I couldn't understand why he was talking about that. And for so long. And so quietly with no emotion. But he would do a little laugh or giggle every now and again while he was telling me this.
 
SurferBabe said:
Did you meet any fellow travelers? I've been wanting to do an all-inclusive solo but the single supplement is brutal!
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No but I wasn't really trying to LOL! People were friendly though, if I were into that it's definitely not difficult. I went after a brutal winter of travel for work. I think I booked on a Wednesday to leave Saturday come back Tuesday. Paid under $1k for everything.
 
I hate when a messy mother tries to get into my kool aid.

I have been dating this guy for a few months now. Initially I wasn’t feeling him at all because he is divorced w/kids. He’s grown on me though and for now he's a cool addition to the rotation. Since our very first outing, his mother has been trying to friend me on FB. Her request has been sitting since Summer 16 :look: . Whenever I’m with him and she calls, she makes it a point to say hello to me through him. She also sends messages through him, like if we meet up and I ask him how his day was, he’ll say I spoke to my mom, she told me to tell you hi. Blank stare every time.

I have already decided that I do not like her and I will not ingratiate her. One of the first things he told me about his divorce is that his parents never liked the girl and they were relieved when he divorced. His former marriage ended 6 years ago. So, when his mama’s friend request popped up, I checked her page out. There is a picture of her 2 grandsons that apparently the ex-wife posted last year. The mama captioned “my grandsons and daughter in law”.

Now if a ninja been divorced for more than half a decade, why are you still calling this chick your daughter in law…especially since they were only married for a year and you supposedly never cared for her. Whatever rocks your boat, but why TF are you friend requesting me when you are obviously friends with the ex wife? GTFOH with your nosey messy self.

My dude knows I’m not feeling his mom. I told him that if he wants to continue dating people, his mom is going to have to take a chill pill. Then I was the one that got the blank stare.
 
Hmmm, so yea going to cancel Match.com and get off this dire need to date and let life just play it self out... Going to focus on bettering self is where I am at now... Doing to much and stressing self out over not having a "man". It seems like everything is based around that point now and feeling down with these dating sites that are not providing results. :perplexed:
 
Browndilocks said:
I hate when a messy mother tries to get into my kool aid.

I have been dating this guy for a few months now. Initially I wasn’t feeling him at all because he is divorced w/kids. He’s grown on me though and for now he's a cool addition to the rotation. Since our very first outing, his mother has been trying to friend me on FB. Her request has been sitting since Summer 16 :look: . Whenever I’m with him and she calls, she makes it a point to say hello to me through him. She also sends messages through him, like if we meet up and I ask him how his day was, he’ll say I spoke to my mom, she told me to tell you hi. Blank stare every time.

I have already decided that I do not like her and I will not ingratiate her. One of the first things he told me about his divorce is that his parents never liked the girl and they were relieved when he divorced. His former marriage ended 6 years ago. So, when his mama’s friend request popped up, I checked her page out. There is a picture of her 2 grandsons that apparently the ex-wife posted last year. The mama captioned “my grandsons and daughter in law”.

Now if a ninja been divorced for more than half a decade, why are you still calling this chick your daughter in law…especially since they were only married for a year and you supposedly never cared for her. Whatever rocks your boat, but why TF are you friend requesting me when you are obviously friends with the ex wife? GTFOH with your nosey messy self.

My dude knows I’m not feeling his mom. I told him that if he wants to continue dating people, his mom is going to have to take a chill pill. Then I was the one that got the blank stare.
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All kindsa red flags (for me). :look:
 
LovinLea said:
I *tried* to do spring cleaning.

The guy who lives in the building asked me on a date to go to the restaurant attached to the building. I texted him back that it's never going to happen.

I texted guy who doesn't want a woman with children and told him we should just be friends because he's not seriously trying to date and I would rather date someone who wants kids. He calls me and tells me there are a lot of types of friends, boyfriends, best friends, friends you just say hi, and f* buddies. Then texts me 1 AM to hang out. He knows I'm celibate.
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So he calls me to tell me that he's decided that he's made the decision that he wants to take on the responsibility of dating a woman with kids and that we've passed the love stage. We make plans to see each other today and he stands me up. I call him, and *he* tells *me* that *I'm* too back and forth.

I see on IG that he and a friend of mine have started following each other and that he's been liking a friend of mine's pictures. She has a 5 year old son.

He is blocked.
 
LovinLea said:
So he calls me to tell me that he's decided that he's made the decision that he wants to take on the responsibility of dating a woman with kids and that we've passed the love stage. We make plans to see each other today and he stands me up. I call him, and *he* tells *me* that *I'm* too back and forth.

I see on IG that he and a friend of mine have started following each other and that he's been liking a friend of mine's pictures. She has a 5 year old son.

He is blocked.
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What kind of EXTREME BS is this!

Disappointed-Terrible-Awful-OMG-Embarassed-Embarassing-WTF-GIF.gif
​
 
I think it is time for me to delete my FB. Not just disable... but delete. I'm moving into a new phase of life and need to leave everything else behind. Time to live for me.

I keep worrying that I'll miss out on something big if I delete my profile, but the truth is that if any of those people were that close to me, they'd have no issue keeping in touch. It'll force me to focus on the people and things in life that really matter.

So I think I'm going to do it today.
 
SurferBabe said:
I think it is time for me to delete my FB. Not just disable... but delete. I'm moving into a new phase of life and need to leave everything else behind. Time to live for me.

I keep worrying that I'll miss out on something big if I delete my profile, but the truth is that if any of those people were that close to me, they'd have no issue keeping in touch. It'll force me to focus on the people and things in life that really matter.

So I think I'm going to do it today.
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@SurferBabe, I deactivated for about 3 months. At first I was having urges to go back, over time I didnt think about the site at all. I was doing other things that were more purposeful to life.

Recently, I had to reenable to signup for some site. Thinking of creating a bogus profile for this purpose. I now dont find the urge to visit everyday or at all.
 
AnjelLuvsUBabe said:
@SurferBabe, I deactivated for about 3 months. At first I was having urges to go back, over time I didnt think about the site at all. I was doing other things that were more purposeful to life.

Recently, I had to reenable to signup for some site. Thinking of creating a bogus profile for this purpose. I now dont find the urge to visit everyday or at all.
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I've deactivated many times but end up coming back to be nosy :lol:. I worry about just deactivating the profile for an extended period of time because hackers and identity thieves take over abandoned and inactive social media accounts. I learned the hard way with some old email accounts I never deleted.

I might create a dummy profile with no pic or anything just to keep up with events and read business reviews. But dassit!
 
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