*-*Single Ladies Support Thread!!*-*

Years ago a coworker quit a job when she realized that it was female dominated. At that time she had decided that she wanted to find husband and that she needed to work where the type of man that she wanted to marry (a black doctor) would be found. She got a job at Providence Hospital and is now married to an orthopedic surgeon with 3 children.

I am currently looking for a part time job but I would really like to work somewhere that has the potential to meet or at least be around more men even if it's just to make more male friends. My current job is %90 women and I don't feel like that energy helps with attracting men.
 
Browndilocks said:
I get what you're saying but I had to learn that this thought pattern is a thin-ice area. It may not be that he deserves ghosting per se, but you're not feeling great about the situation. You are number one. By you not feeling absolutely great, you have a reason to enforce a casualty.
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Agreed. Like the book says BE SELFISH. Put YOU first and this situation is not making you feel good.
 
TopShelf said:
Years ago a coworker quit a job when she realized that it was female dominated. At that time she had decided that she wanted to find husband and that she needed to work where the type of man that she wanted to marry (a black doctor) would be found. She got a job at Providence Hospital and is now married to an orthopedic surgeon with 3 children.

I am currently looking for a part time job but I would really like to work somewhere that has the potential to meet or at least be around more men even if it's just to make more male friends. My current job is %90 women and I don't feel like that energy helps with attracting men.
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This is a great idea. hmmm.... thinking of my future job options too!
 
TopShelf said:
Years ago a coworker quit a job when she realized that it was female dominated. At that time she had decided that she wanted to find husband and that she needed to work where the type of man that she wanted to marry (a black doctor) would be found. She got a job at Providence Hospital and is now married to an orthopedic surgeon with 3 children.

I am currently looking for a part time job but I would really like to work somewhere that has the potential to meet or at least be around more men even if it's just to make more male friends. My current job is %90 women and I don't feel like that energy helps with attracting men.
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Shame on me then! I need to be doing better in a male dominated field, "Technology", seriously though, most of these men are married and/or too young! :perplexed:
 
TopShelf said:
Years ago a coworker quit a job when she realized that it was female dominated. At that time she had decided that she wanted to find husband and that she needed to work where the type of man that she wanted to marry (a black doctor) would be found. She got a job at Providence Hospital and is now married to an orthopedic surgeon with 3 children.

I am currently looking for a part time job but I would really like to work somewhere that has the potential to meet or at least be around more men even if it's just to make more male friends. My current job is %90 women and I don't feel like that energy helps with attracting men.
Click to expand...

Maybe I should have gone into finance. o_O
 
Had a date today but I wasn't in the mood, so I asked could we reschedule. Job related bad mood, you know it's been hard for me finding a good job I actually like.

Taco Tuesday date hit me up and I didn't wanna not answer (cause he don't know me) & people don't like be ignored, but I clearly told him I was in a bad mood and he still didn't get it.

IMG_2049.jpg IMG_2052.PNG
 
@ms.tatiana
He's not getting it because he's not paying attention. He is focused on himself and what he wants. Notice he didn't say Can I come give you a hug?, he said can I come get a hug as in for himself. And when you tried to clarify he became defensive and protective of himself. Not once did he ask what went wrong today? Why are you so upset? Or is there anything I can do to make you feel better? Or even simply say sorry to hear you are having a bad day.
 
So the guy I danced, flirted with and kissed at my friend's wedding (see post #21106) I'm calling him C. I got his birth information that night and finally got around to configuring his chart. :look: One thing I love about astrology is it allows me to articulate things I know but can't find words to. I knew this man was a Gemini but I didn't know he had a bunch of other personal planets in Gemini too. :eek: I see why he's such good friends with the groom, who is a Scorpio like me and married my friend who is also a Gemini. Great for friendship and short-term flings but not LTRs.:nono: What's weird is Gemini, the sign of intellect, is the sign of my 7th house cusp, the house of relationships and our conversations weren't at all intellectual. In fact he tried to steer the discussion away from that. At the time it was refreshing but wouldn't work out long-term. We have markers of a partnership, just an unstable one lol. :giggle::giggle:
 
I have been in such a stank mood when it comes to men lately, I just have zero tolerance and I don't know how to break out of this. I think that some of it is warranted but the rest I need to chill, for instance; one of the new little dudes has been basically begging to facetime with me and I'm just like "Ninja for what?!?!".

I don't like being held hostage on the phone and I hate the production that comes with face timing with someone that I don't really know, just call or text me bro, I got stuff to do.
 
So guy calls me last night... I gave him my number more than a week ago so I am very annoyed that he is just now using it. But whatever- I have nothing else to do.
Immediately he is bragging about his job- a chef for award shows like the Globes, etc. mentioning how he knows celebrities, was apart of movie productions, etc. I am unimpressed- I am very hesitant regarding men that push things like compliments or their jobs.

So then he asks me what I do- I told him a regular 9-5. Then he starts PRESSING. So I am like, I am a researcher- just plain ole boring work that I don't get paid enough for (lmao). So then I switch the subject and tell him I need my beauty rest so I will talk to him later. So he asked me to call him on my lunch break today (lmaooooo). This is going to be fun. Will use him for some connections if he is really in the know like that. This heart is on ice for 2017- gonna practice these dating tactics.
 
Feeling in a better mood today. Spoke to my sister yesterday who asked me if I was really ready to date after my break up? I told her I hadn't given it serious thought. Meaning, you know when you have a bad break up you take time and figure out if you are ready to dust yourself off and get back out there? I didn't really do that because my break up wasn't bad (for me..I was the dumper :look:). And I had already been wanting out for quite a while. So the only thing I really reflected on for a second was the kind of guy I want and how soon I felt like putting in the effort to find him which happened almost immediately. I had to give it some real thought while on the phone with her and I said I guess not. I feel tired when I think about dating. Not discouraged - definitely not - but more like I need a break. I'm only half-heartedly looking which probably means I'm not ready. When I used to think of someone not being ready I always related it to heartbreak and healing but I see now that isn't always the case. I'm not heartbroken but I need to take time for myself too. I deserve some me time and special attention too and that is what I'm going to do. I'm not swearing anything off of course but I also don't want to unintentionally hurt someone because I think I'm ready when I'm really not. and I can almost guarantee a man is going to waltz right into my life when I'm not looking. :lol:

So to start this off I took myself out last night. Went to a Mexican place I love that has the best chicken quesadillas I've ever had. Had a margarita and sat there looking out the window just chilling. It was lovely. I didn't get to do all the other things I planned to do on Monday and Tuesday but that's OK. Tonight, one of my best male friends and I are going to my all time favorite place and I will indulge in as much sangria as I can take.
 
The conference in sf was cool. I saw 1 whole black woman! And 2 whole black guys! One of which actually stopped by our booth to chat-he was a young guy, too! With his own consulting firm. He pairs big data merging companies with big pharma/biotechs. Good job, guy!

Good lord I couldn't live in sf. The amount of Asian people is nauseating :look: and they all look out for each other, too. You can just tell. Bastards :lachen: jk, good for them.

Me and the coworker balled the hell out on company dime :lol: she is so much fun. We ordered everything. The ceo was like "have fun" and that's exactly what we did :lol: we ordered $100+ bottles of wine and champagne for every dinner :lachen: she would be like "give us the most expensive bottle you have" every time :lachen:

We deserve it tho. We were the only women representing our company at the conference. The sexism in this industry is palpable. Someone will say "I'm really liberal, and hate all things trump, and racism/sexism is the debil" in 1 sentence and will cut women off mid sentence and talk over them next. Like octavias character said "I know..I know you believe that" :lol:

My coworker said she's going to ask for a raise this summer, and I think I will too :lachen: we've only been there 3mos so far, but I can already tell, ima need more money if they want me to keep going to these racist/sexist ass conferences. The ceo told me about this other thing he wants me to do and said "and we'll compensate you for it, etc" oh, I know *****, I know. Don't you worry. :lol:
 
Omg and I'm just too conservative to live there. One of my MALE flight attendants had on this bomb engagement ring :rofl: bruh.

90% of the tsa workers are like Hawaiian or some **** :lachen: like I can't, dawg.

Ive been to sf before, but I was with my black gf and she mainly took us to Oakland.

The dynamic that my ceo has with me, and the one he has with my coworker is very different. He tells me things like "I see you as an adult" (referencing other company shenanigans lol), "you're very responsible", "you're able to take charge", etc. Meanwhile he says stuff like "you need to focus", "you have your head in the clouds", "people feel like they can't talk to you" to her. And I really think it's cuz I'm black lol. Cuz....not really, fam :lol: like he just sees me as Assertive Black Woman who Gets Ish Done and Don't Take No Mess, you know? I mean that's great :lachen: ijs, it's very interesting.
 
I go to this bar fairly regularly. Both the manager and his nephew are rumored to have a crush on me.

Last night, the nephew played "just a friend" on his Snapchat with my initials. Around the same time the uncle sent me the video of the same song on my WhatsApp. :lachen:

I sent the nephew a message that they both play too much but he didn't even know his uncle sent the same thing. I didn't even reply to the uncle because he's a nasty man.

I think I'm gonna need take a Harlem time out.
 
glad you had fun!

but seeeee told you. SF area aint for black folks nomo...smh 100% gentrified. and yea. Pharma can be super sexist.

qchelle said:
The conference in sf was cool. I saw 1 whole black woman! And 2 whole black guys! One of which actually stopped by our booth to chat-he was a young guy, too! With his own consulting firm. He pairs big data merging companies with big pharma/biotechs. Good job, guy!

Good lord I couldn't live in sf. The amount of Asian people is nauseating :look: and they all look out for each other, too. You can just tell. Bastards :lachen: jk, good for them.

Me and the coworker balled the hell out on company dime :lol: she is so much fun. We ordered everything. The ceo was like "have fun" and that's exactly what we did :lol: we ordered $100+ bottles of wine and champagne for every dinner :lachen: she would be like "give us the most expensive bottle you have" every time :lachen:

We deserve it tho. We were the only women representing our company at the conference. The sexism in this industry is palpable. Someone will say "I'm really liberal, and hate all things trump, and racism/sexism is the debil" in 1 sentence and will cut women off mid sentence and talk over them next. Like octavias character said "I know..I know you believe that" :lol:

My coworker said she's going to ask for a raise this summer, and I think I will too :lachen: we've only been there 3mos so far, but I can already tell, ima need more money if they want me to keep going to these racist/sexist ass conferences. The ceo told me about this other thing he wants me to do and said "and we'll compensate you for it, etc" oh, I know *****, I know. Don't you worry. :lol:
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I SWEAR nigs ain't bout nothing


So I was on Instagram and I got a follower recommendation, and it was this basketball player dude that I talked to/messed around with for about a year so I was like why not? I sent him a follow request , and he followed me and accepted me.

I'm looking through his pictures and this ninja was in a relationship the entire time we were dealing with each other, not to mention all the times he's invited me to visit him in philly during the last 6 months. I can't
 
MzLady78 said:
^^^ SMH. Nothing surprises me anymore when it comes to these ninjas out here.
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Right?? My feelings aren't hurt because he was used for a specific reason & sent on his way :look: but really dude? I shouldn't be surprised at all but it's funny he even accepted me, trifling.

That's exactly how #hurtbaes are created, dudes be exposing their girls to potential drama, I would never do it because it's not that serious to me but it would be nothing to blow up his spot.
 
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