I know where you are coming from. I'm truly worried about my emotional outcomes, but I don't feel like I'm wasting my time because I have NO interest in any man I meet. Like none. I've only had this type of connection with maybe 2 men previously, so I'm not hopeful that the next man (I want) is around the corner.
Thanks for understanding *deep breath* I've had like 4,275 conversations with people telling me that the man I want doesn't exist. And I've started to believe them. I do need to snap out of this, and it doesn't help that this guy is the smartest most understanding ninja I've ever met in my life.
Hey girl! Sorry I completely missed this.
Updates: I have burned this roster to the ground lol. I had a conversation with my school girlfriends on Friday which really made me evaluate the guys that I have been dating, and when I looked at everything objectively I realized that every last one of these guys is mediocre.Ok updates on this.
Friday: Great date with Finance guy. He's not as tall in person as I expected but still had a little height on me even with my heels on. He sent me a really sweet message saying that "I really left an impression on him." He also told me I looked more beautiful in person which earned him some points lol! We're going out for dinner next week for steak... he's definitely a "meat" man. The first date place was my pick; a hipster spot in my neighborhood, I don't think he cared for the food but he obliged me haha! I'm not sure if there are sparks here but he's definitely worth seeing again because I had a good time.
Saturday: Went out to a wine bar with the law student because the coffee place was closed. I ended up being late because I'd had an exam earlier that day and took a nap... I realistically need a minimum of 75 minutes to get ready, so yeah I was late. He was seated when I got there and in the dimly lit room I found him more attractive than his pictures. We had a really great conversation, he made me laugh a lot, and I felt "charming" hah! We talked about some deeper political stuff but for the most part kept it really light and fun. So downside, at the end of the date when he stood up I realized that physically he just doesn't do it for me. I think he'd be cool to have as a friend if he's into it, but we'll see. If he asks me out again I'd probably go just to confirm that the physical attraction is/isn't there.
Sunday: Engineering student was hungover so we re-scheduled our second date. I was honestly incredibly annoyed with him for this. He apologized profusely but still this is red flag for me and major points were lost. We now have plans for an active date this Saturday, but this information has been added to his file.
I have to say this whole vetting process is making me feel very powerful. My nerves before my dates are basically non-existent. I'm going in treating them like an interview. I'm still my fun, silly, girly self but I have this new inner dating confidence that I love and I think men are really drawn too.
Sorry you are feeling this way. What do you actually feel the issue is? My approach to things tends to be very pragmatic, so in saying that...
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I did this and I am pleased!
Im a person that is loyal and loving but at times I gotta put that aside.
Whew that sounds crazy...but true!
Well I live in south Florida so its mostly white people. But im apart of the haitian community so I am frequently around haitian men. Sometimes around thousands of haitians and I never get talked too. Back in NYC I was around AA's and Caribbeans and still got zero play. I have never tried online dating, I hear too many horror stories of people not being who they really are.Sorry you are feeling this way. What do you actually feel the issue is? My approach to things tends to be very pragmatic, so in saying that...
Despite current popular opinion, I don't believe EVERYTHING is the fault of the beholder. Some things are just location, opportunity, demographics. Maybe the type of man you're looking for and who would find you attractive isn't in your immediate surroundings? maybe where you are isn't conducive to attracting the type of man to reside in your areanew who is best for you. No fault of the seeker (you). It's just not the best situation.
I'm in similar where my old arse is surrounded by 20 some white hipsters, Asians and a certain type of black male not interested in black women (on a larger scale than normal--but this is California
have you tried online dating?
but I do believe our thoughts and words play a big hand in creating our reality so I'm glad you're shifting your focus 
Im focusing on school, decorating my room, and having a better relationship with God.I think that you'll see a positive change now that you've stopped letting it consume you, what you give attention to and dwell on often times becomes reality so taking the time to be happy with yourself and not dwell on finding your happiness in a man will create a new reality for you. Sorry to sound like a big hippy
Men are annoying anyways.
Eta- Are you opposed to approaching them?
What about brief eye contact and a a quick shy smile to signal to him that it's ok for him to approach you?
I dress presentable. But i have been dressed to the nines out and about with no reaction. no makeup, nice twistout out pony tail, Blouse, jeans, flats or sandals while doing errands. I dont go out much.
Perhaps this right here has something to do with it? Can't meet people if you don't go out.
I am very comfortable with women. Im cool with older men. But I do get nervous around men.
I can't with this dude.
He were video chatting and he was like "babe, when you gonna write my Trip Advisor review?"
I assured him I'd give him a glowing review. His umm...extra services aside, he is really good at his job.
Cute. *****
I can't with this dude.
We were video chatting and he was like "babe, when you gonna write my Trip Advisor review?"
I assured him I'd give him a glowing review. His umm...extra services aside, he is really good at his job.
You're about to find yourself in a long distance relationship
I'm researching flights for him as we speak and it isn't pretty. I feel nervous about it being in a strange city. You'll be there for work. No besties to call and you're on your own if OKC or Tinder date gets stupid. The professional happy hours might be nice. See how the professionals get down over there.
