*-*Single Ladies Support Thread!!*-*

qchelle said:
Well. I'm in Atlanta with 2 friends. They're single single and actively looking to mingle. We were at this bar last night and these 2 guys came and sat near us and we started talking. 1 of the guys kept ****ing talking to me. Hes a sniper in the military and had a really stoic demeanor lol. Well they invited us to this house party. And of course my friends wanted to go. I didn't, but I didn't say that lol. So we went. In this strange man's car. I don't know why I hang out with these friends. I must don't value my life lol. I told them I'm not coming on the Atlanta trip next year. Cuz this ain't my scene.
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Lol, this is why I either drive separately or make sure I have uber money to get back to my destination.
 
sgold04 said:
Lol, this is why I either drive separately or make sure I have uber money to get back to my destination.
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We took an uber to the bar! :lol: and I had money to get back, but we're staying with 1 of my friends' ex bfs :lachen: so I didn't want to go back there by myself. Isn't this some ratchet mess? :lachen: like I said, im over this idea of "fun". I need a hotel room to myself and sleep at night smh.
 
sgold04 said:
Black families are 300 years behind white families for a reason. Gov't policies that lifted white families out of poverty and created generational wealth (the homestead act, GI bills, etc) were off limits to blacks. Choosing to live solo and owning a car are not responsible for the gap. Also, Indians are allowed to come here on high level visas, they ain't starting from the bottom, and Asians are not a homogenous, high achieving group like the media would have us think. I come from a city with a large, POOR Asian community (Vietnamese and Cambodian) that struggles with the same issues as poor black communities (gangs, drugs, etc).

If we look at black folks in poverty, they are living with cousins, aunts, parents, grandparents, etc.

For middle class folks, there's a difference between living with people to save money and pay off debt, and living with people cuz you're a bum. I personally (LHCF may think differently) had no issue dating a man with roommates in DC, the ones I dated were saving for houses (one is closing on a house now). We also have to add to the mix that our economic opportunities are based on geography, so while I'd love to live with family for a year, my family doesn't live where the high paying jobs are in my career. If I stayed home in my town in Cali, I'd probably have a couple kids and a decent job in the school district with a mediocre wage, but one that made no impact on kids lives.

Also, because of economic and racial segregation: for many whites, well-to-do Asians, and Indians, living at home means living in good neighborhoods, but that's not necessarily the case for black folks.
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I agree completely, which is why I said that isn't the sole reason.

The men I was referring to aren't bums. They were gainfully employed (federal government/Deloitte), no kids, college educated. Probably just didn't make a lot of smart decisions with money and now it has caught up to them now that they are in their early 30s.
 
keyawarren said:
Hmm, I just got hit up by a male friend...

"What's up woman...get dressed like around 1...we going out and doing something today"

I asked for a hint so I can dress properly :look:
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Are you a "Rules" girl? Otherwise...have fun!

But i cannot stand when people/men do this. Like what if that's shampoo day? What if I haven't shaved?
 
aviddiva77 said:
Are you a "Rules" girl? Otherwise...have fun!

But i cannot stand when people/men do this. Like what if that's shampoo day? What if I haven't shaved?
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I sorta am. However he's not a potential SO. Just good male company.

I like when people do this. I rarely ever plan stuff for me and my friends, so when they invite me out, I'm game.

Last minute is even more exciting :look:
 
I don't want to live somewhere where I can't have a car. My car is already paid off anyway, and I want to keep it until I pay off all my student loan debt. I was resistant to the idea of a roommate, but I think I will have to get one when I graduate from my Master's program because I will likely be working in the NYC/North Jersey area and rent is high, and I am cheap.

But I'm keeping my car!!!!
 
Well damn it. I have the option of what seems like a cut buddy. And another option of a guy (great on paper) who lives in the racist town where I work. I'm conflicted. Potential CutB is all "come over. We'll have a drink and view the bay from my terrace. We can work out those tight mucles." :eek: :lol: the innuendos are deep with this one. He's 25, customer care associate, wants to work with the SPCA. He's Latino (not sure how I feel about this).

The other one is heavy equipment operator, 31, 6'4" family oriente but wants a one-man woman (which might put a damper on the CutB) and wants to develop a friendship that grown into a LTR (whatever that means). And he's white (not sure how I feel about this). See this is where my "I don't wanna date" bs gets me.

Do I let CutB go and see where it goes with the potentially white racist dude?(this sounds stupid to me. Why let go of a sure *ucking for something that might not work out? I'll be right back at square one with my vibrator). Or do I go with both and potentially mess up a good thing with potentially racist dude because I'm inpatient and horny? Or do I let potentially racist dude go and stick with CutB who might end up burying me in the bushes out back? (Haven't even met dude and he's already asked to have a drink on my patio. I told him about my living situation so he suggested his house. This feels like the start of a horror movie).
 
keyawarren said:
I sorta am. However he's not a potential SO. Just good male company.

I like when people do this. I rarely ever plan stuff for me and my friends, so when they invite me out, I'm game.

Last minute is even more exciting :look:
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Ah! Then my comment stands. Have fun!

Woow. I would kill to be like that. Fun and fancy free. Not overthinking things. Just "LET'S GO AND WE'LL FIGURE IT OUT ON THE WAY."
 
Date both @aviddiva77

As was mentioned in the "men don't love.." thread, dating is to collect info. Do you know enough about Latino dude to bless him with the goodies? Do you know enough about white dude to determine his racial beliefs? (Or is this based on where he lives?) Are either of them worthy of more of your time and energy? Unless you guys have the monogamy talk, you don't owe it to either to focus your attention solely on them.
 
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Since I'm all up in everybody else's posts today, I guess I should share an update lol...

Nothing to report...

Hehe, I kid. But not really.

I speak to foreign bae daily. I'll probably go visit sometime this fall. I'm not pushing for anything to happen, I'm just enjoying the attention and the stimulating conversation.

As far as local potentials, there are none. I've been a hermit. I'm focusing on work, which I loooove, but it's overwhelming at times and it's not a good time to get to know someone. I'm also getting my financial house in order after 5 years of indentured servitude known as doctoral study, so I'm minimizing social activities, plus it HOT out here. Good lawd I was not prepared for this Houston heat and monsoon rains. I'm also supposed to be losing weight, but that's not happening. I do great for a week or two then I blow it by not grocery shopping and food prepping. People here give me the side eye when I say I need to lose a lot of weight, so it's easy to be content at my current size.

Anywho, I'm open, but not searching. I'm content right now, but I will "put myself out there" more come fall because I do really want and need a two income household in the near future :) Along with companionship and all that jazz.
 
aviddiva77 said:
Well damn it. I have the option of what seems like a cut buddy. And another option of a guy (great on paper) who lives in the racist town where I work. I'm conflicted. Potential CutB is all "come over. We'll have a drink and view the bay from my terrace. We can work out those tight mucles." :eek: :lol: the innuendos are deep with this one. He's 25, customer care associate, wants to work with the SPCA. He's Latino (not sure how I feel about this).

The other one is heavy equipment operator, 31, 6'4" family oriente but wants a one-man woman (which might put a damper on the CutB) and wants to develop a friendship that grown into a LTR (whatever that means). And he's white (not sure how I feel about this). See this is where my "I don't wanna date" bs gets me.

Do I let CutB go and see where it goes with the potentially white racist dude?(this sounds stupid to me. Why let go of a sure *ucking for something that might not work out? I'll be right back at square one with my vibrator). Or do I go with both and potentially mess up a good thing with potentially racist dude because I'm inpatient and horny? Or do I let potentially racist dude go and stick with CutB who might end up burying me in the bushes out back? (Haven't even met dude and he's already asked to have a drink on my patio. I told him about my living situation so he suggested his house. This feels like the start of a horror movie).
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Sounds like you are over thinking this.

IF you have interest in both of them, then you should hold on to both of them. Due to your inexperience, it is far too early to assess if either of them are a good fit for what you want ( in either arena).

Since you are a noob ( I don't mean that in a mean way) I would avoid losing the vcard to a complete stranger. Not just because its precious, but when it happens you may very likely be emotional. It would be far "safer" to do it with someone who cares about you at least on some level.

You should continue to get to know them and assess if your assumptions are correct. If the white guy is racist, you'll find out. If the ltr guy isnt a good match for you, then you'll find out. Like any other dating situation, its called "getting to know someone".
 
aviddiva77 said:
Well damn it. I have the option of what seems like a cut buddy. And another option of a guy (great on paper) who lives in the racist town where I work. I'm conflicted. Potential CutB is all "come over. We'll have a drink and view the bay from my terrace. We can work out those tight mucles." :eek: :lol: the innuendos are deep with this one. He's 25, customer care associate, wants to work with the SPCA. He's Latino (not sure how I feel about this).

The other one is heavy equipment operator, 31, 6'4" family oriente but wants a one-man woman (which might put a damper on the CutB) and wants to develop a friendship that grown into a LTR (whatever that means). And he's white (not sure how I feel about this). See this is where my "I don't wanna date" bs gets me.

Do I let CutB go and see where it goes with the potentially white racist dude?(this sounds stupid to me. Why let go of a sure *ucking for something that might not work out? I'll be right back at square one with my vibrator). Or do I go with both and potentially mess up a good thing with potentially racist dude because I'm inpatient and horny? Or do I let potentially racist dude go and stick with CutB who might end up burying me in the bushes out back? (Haven't even met dude and he's already asked to have a drink on my patio. I told him about my living situation so he suggested his house. This feels like the start of a horror movie).
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How much money does a customer care associate make? How much money does a heavy equipment operator make?

I don't think it's worthwhile to date poor men, especially poor white men.

Yes, I know a cut buddy is just for fun, not serious dating but any man in my personal space has to do for me. I'm bossy and selfish, always looking for the benefit of giving a man my attention.

Are you just joking about the racist thing? Has he made questionable comments? Even if he's not racist and poor, you should date who you want, sex who you want etc. until you know he's worth your full attention.
 
sgold04 said:
Date both @aviddiva77

As was mentioned in the "men don't love.." thread, dating is to collect info. Do you know enough about Latino dude to bless him with the goodies? Do you know enough about white dude to determine his racial beliefs? (Or is this based on where he lives?) Are either of them worthy of more of your time and energy? Unless you guys have the monogamy talk, you don't owe it to either to focus your attention solely on them.
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LoveLiLi said:
How much money does a customer care associate make? How much money does a heavy equipment operator make?

I don't think it's worthwhile to date poor men, especially poor white men.

Yes, I know a cut buddy is just for fun, not serious dating but any man in my personal space has to do for me. I'm bossy and selfish, always looking for the benefit of giving a man my attention.

Are you just joking about the racist thing? Has he made questionable comments? Even if he's not racist and poor, you should date who you want, sex who you want etc. until you know he's worth your full attention.
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I'm kind of joking. Or more like being prejudice? The town he lives in was a sundown town until about a decade or so ago. I still get nasty stares from people when I go to stores/pick up lunch. He may be a transplant.

Thats what I was thinking too. If Im dating white/out can he have some dang money?! In terms of money, it looks like I'm making more than the Latin guy and the white guy is about 70k in my area maybe a bit more with overtime. He'd have to be to live in the town he does (prices are ridiculous there).
keyawarren said:
Sounds like you are over thinking this.

IF you have interest in both of them, then you should hold on to both of them. Due to your inexperience, it is far too early to assess if either of them are a good fit for what you want ( in either arena).

Since you are a noob ( I don't mean that in a mean way) I would avoid losing the vcard to a complete stranger. Not just because its precious, but when it happens you may very likely be emotional. It would be far "safer" to do it with someone who cares about you at least on some level.

You should continue to get to know them and assess if your assumptions are correct. If the white guy is racist, you'll find out. If the ltr guy isnt a good match for you, then you'll find out. Like any other dating situation, its called "getting to know someone".
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You are probably right lol. I am still in the talking stage with these guys (and another one who I think I'm going to drop) so I'm worrying about things that I shouldn't. So I'm going to stop thinking so much and just go with it. And see how these play out.
 
MzLady78 said:
Same here. I was around a few couples this weekend, as like mentioned in my other post, a few folks got married, so I think it has me feeling some kind of way. Hopefully, it passes soon.
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But my environment hasn't changed. Haven't been around any couples/married folks. The only thing I can think of is that I have been working a ton all summer and especially last month and now I have free time = time to think/reflect. Ugh....

Yeah, I need this to pass ASAP.
 
I don't know what it is about me, but I attract the freakiest men. Not a regular freak like Adina Howard, but like freaky freaky.

This one very handsome man I know for a group I'm affiliated with hit me up two nights ago. It was normal, pleasant conversation...then he started going into his love of dominatrix sex. He's the one that likes to be dominated :drunk: Whips and chains and all that jazz...

Lord Jesus, please deliver me from this dating pool :pullhair:
 
It was my friends 27th birthday so we basically went clubbing & to strip clubs everyday. Also went to the concert (Drake & Future) It was Houston Appreciation weekend it was everyone keep saying. The city was packed.

But I just love the black men in Houston because they didn't have any problems showing me love (so different from California).



Phoenix14 said:
What did you do.... Lol
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Interesting. So that's what a uncircumcised peen looks like while masturbating. Noted. I DIDN'T ASK! But 5-6 inches. Which is bigger than my toy I have so I'm :peek:

Another guy (half Jamaician half Nigerian) supposedly two master degrees works in healthcare as a direct support professional (which I still have no clue as to what that is), wants to take me to dinner to talk/get to know each other more. I can tell how he types that there's gonna be a language barrier and I don't have the patience for that. Plus I don't wanna ****** go. I just wanna get through all these damn birthdays (4 in total for the month) and this wedding. But I SHOULD though.
 
aviddiva77 said:
Interesting. So that's what a uncircumcised peen looks like while masturbating. Noted. I DIDN'T ASK! But 5-6 inches. Which is bigger than my toy I have so I'm :peek:

Another guy (half Jamaician half Nigerian) supposedly two master degrees works in healthcare as a direct support professional (which I still have no clue as to what that is), wants to take me to dinner to talk/get to know each other more. I can tell how he types that there's gonna be a language barrier and I don't have the patience for that. Plus I don't wanna ****** go. I just wanna get through all these damn birthdays (4 in total for the month) and this wedding. But I SHOULD though.
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Girl, go!!!! Lol.
Why would there be a language barrier.. like is he one of those ppl that uses every big word in the English vocabulary?
 
sgold04 said:
I don't know what it is about me, but I attract the freakiest men. Not a regular freak like Adina Howard, but like freaky freaky.

This one very handsome man I know for a group I'm affiliated with hit me up two nights ago. It was normal, pleasant conversation...then he started going into his love of dominatrix sex. He's the one that likes to be dominated :drunk: Whips and chains and all that jazz...

Lord Jesus, please deliver me from this dating pool :pullhair:
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So... you gonna do it or nah?
 
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