My ex husband had a baby.....

[mrsjohnson75]

I don't think that's true. I've worked w/ countless moms who gave birth while "dad" was locked up or just not around and they all have "dads" last name. *shrugs*

You can name your child whatever but you can't put his name on the birth certificate without his signature.

This is correct. At least it is in the State of Florida.

 

[tocktick]

BS Alert...BS Alert!!!!
@ your ex for even uttering those words! How can tricking you to signing a piece of paper lessen the hurt you will feel from his betrayal???? Boy I tell you....SMH.....

I'm sorry this happened to you, and after 8 years I know it just hurts so bad, but it sounds like he has a LOT of growing up to do.

yeah, the bold was coming through my mind when i read that part of OP's post too.

Girrrrrrl, be thankful there were no kids. Clean break.

Move on w/ your life and allow someone else to really love you.

agreed. he did you a favour by bringing about the divorce.

 

[MissScarlett]

I don't think that's true. I've worked w/ countless moms who gave birth while "dad" was locked up or just not around and they all have "dads" last name. *shrugs*

You can name your child whatever but you can't put his name on the birth certificate without his signature.

See, I don't know about that either. I know that if you have a baby, the child gets YOUR name unless you are married, or the father came and signed the BC. OP-since we have concluded this man is devious, do you think he could have perhaps signed the BC and not told you?

OR which I think is more plausible.....The woman could have named the baby his first/middle and last name but her name would have been tacked on at the end.

Alot of these chicks do that by hyphenating, that's how they get around it. And then they mysteriously try and 'drop the mother's name'.

Ex. John Charles Smith-Thomas (Smith being mom's name) John Charles Smith being dad's name.

I don't know where you live but in GA, you can't put a last name on a child that is not either YOURS or the daddy had to sign the BC.

ETA: I didn't mean to offend anyone who may have a hyphenated name.

 

[MissScarlett]

This is correct. At least it is in the State of Florida.

THey gave the kid the dad's last name when they were NOT married?

 

[TCatt86]

This really depends on the state. In Texas the child will take the unmarried mother's name if the father is not present to sign the Birth Certificate.

Yeah that's how it is in Louisiana. I guess it depends on the state.

 

[Valerie]

Kelly, give the Lord thanks and ask him to shelter you, until the right man goes along and bless with children. I was married for seven years and my husband called for divorce 3 days before my 7th wedding anniversary, the divorce was horrible and the pain with it. But there is a light at the end of the tunnel and you realise that you can get someone to really love you, you can have peace. Forgive your husband and let him go. Some of these people are a Lot in your life, they have chaos and confusion demons with them, you need peace and freedom. God Bless you.

 

[loved]

Even though it hurts right now, it sounds like you were blessed when you were covered/sheltered from weapons you weren't even aware of.

God is good all the time and you are building your testimony in this moment.

 

[Ms.Nigeria]

i'm so sorry to hear. stay strong in prayer

 

[deltagyrl]

See, I don't know about that either. I know that if you have a baby, the child gets YOUR name unless you are married, or the father came and signed the BC. OP-since we have concluded this man is devious, do you think he could have perhaps signed the BC and not told you?

OR which I think is more plausible.....The woman could have named the baby his first/middle and last name but her name would have been tacked on at the end.

Alot of these chicks do that by hyphenating, that's how they get around it. And then they mysteriously try and 'drop the mother's name'.

Ex. John Charles Smith-Thomas (Smith being mom's name) John Charles Smith being dad's name.

I don't know where you live but in GA, you can't put a last name on a child that is not either YOURS or the daddy had to sign the BC.

ETA: I didn't mean to offend anyone who may have a hyphenated name.

Maybe it's a state thing? Definitely not true everywhere.

I've seen tons of birth certificates where there was no dad listed (due to incarceration/deadbeatism/death) but child had dad's last name.

 

[kellylinn77]

Hey ladies,
Thank you all for the comforting words just trying to take it one day at a time.

 

[ElizaBlue]

Hey Kell,

My heart goes out to you. But I can tell you this, you will get over him. And as far as what you did to get even, well we all know hell hath no fury like a woman's scorn. I don't care what you did, in my opinion you were being reactionary. He put you in a situation where you thought you were doing what was best for your marriage. Yeah the army can come down on you for that but put that ish on CNN and then let them deal with it.

The other thing I want to say is...sometimes God's greatest gifts are prayers that go unanswered. This to the children you wanted to bear this fool and also to you and him getting back together.

You just didn't know it but the angels had you on autopilot. You are now on course to arrive at the destination God has for you. Because surely it was not with that dumb ***.

Hang in there baby. You can do it.

 

[MissScarlett]

Maybe it's a state thing? Definitely not true everywhere.

I've seen tons of birth certificates where there was no dad listed (due to incarceration/deadbeatism/death) but child had dad's last name.

but where they married?

 

[mrsjohnson75]

THey gave the kid the dad's last name when they were NOT married?

Yes. They were not married. The child got the sperm donor's last name.

Sperm donor was not there for the birth. Later on (3 weeks later) when sperm donor came in town to see baby for the first time the sperm donor was able to add his name to it by signing, getting it notorized, etc.. and the sperm donor name was put on the birth certificate.

Even if the sperm donor had not added his name to the BC, the last name of sperm donor was on there and could not have been changed.

 

[ladylibra]

first off OP - baby girl i feel so bad for you. if i weren't at work i would be crying. {{{big hug}}}

yes, you can name your child whatever the heck you want to... or at least in the state of Indiana you can. my SO signed the birth certificate with me when our son was born... but lemme tell ya, when i was born my daddy didn't sign mine. my mother put her full name on the dotted line and put mine with DAD'S last name on the dotted line. now after they got married he went back and signed it but you don't have to list the father's name in Indiana to make it okay to give your child a different surname.

i will close by saying this - i don't mean to sound harsh, but i'm glad you two don't have kids. imagine how much harder this would be if you did.

 

[NYAmicas]

Thanks for all the responses ladies, I just really need some strength right now. I'm all f@#ked up over this.

My prayers are with you Kelly that you'll get some strength, hope, whatever you need. No one deserves what you're going through. We're all rooting for you.

 

[prettykinks]

Sorry to hear this has happened to you. Let God handle this. Don't try to deal with this yourself.


My sis lives in GA and she has three kids by three different men and they all have different last names. She has never been married. She delivered the last two alone.

 

[SpiritJunkie]

sorry to hear this happened to you. as the other ladies said God had his reasons for you not having a child with Bozzo.


time heals all wounds.....Bless