Married Ladies Random Thoughts

CurliDiva said:
So, DH tried to buy several bath products for me from amazon (sweet gesture) BUT when they arrived the jars seemed half-used, bath salts which were supposedly lavender-scent smelled nothing like lavender and was very powdery, and nothing was sealed or even seemed tightly closed. I tried to explain gently (of course) that while I appreciate his gesture but I do not trust the integrity of these products and would not be using them especially while pregnant. I dump half of the half-empty jar of bath salts into the toilet and it fizzed up like Alka-Seltzer! Was I wrong? :(
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I think the gesture was sweet. I think i would have kept my disdain for the products to myself or quietly sent them an email and had them send out new uncompromised product. I would have been appreciative of the gifts and just disposed of them very quietly. If I were a man...I'd be hesitant on buying you anything else because I don't want ot upset you or do anything wrong...so I just wouldn't buy anything else.

OAN: I really want to take a stab at making my own bath bombs. Seems like so much fun and I love having them in the tub.
 
DH is so passive aggressive. My pastor picked up on it. He apologized and told me I need someone that truly covers me. DH has moved out. It's been weeks since he's been home. Little one has RSV pretty bad and so his mother told him to come "help her with that baby". So he came in on Friday to help me with DS. My mother was annoyed because instead of him calling her to see where DS was (because he couldn't get in touch with me) he got his mother to call my mother to set something up. This is absolutely ridiculous. Are you 30+ or 3? Well he comes to the house and I'm afraid to say anything to him. HE SLEEPS IN MY BED. This annoyed me to the heavens. Didn't you scream at me just two weeks ago that you don't won't me only your child? Why are you in my bed...but the bigger question is why didn't I say something? I feel like darned if I do darned if I don't.

If I talk to him while he's here he will say I'm making him uncomfortable and he doesn't want me he's only here for the baby.
If I don't talk to him he will say that I'm so disrespectful and he takes care of the baby all by himself and I didn't even appreciate his efforts.
However since I take care of DS by myself...if he wanted to "help" he honestly could have taken DS to his mother's house for the weekend and brought him back on Sunday.
I feel like him coming to spend the weekend to "take care of the baby" is just to mind bomb me. This will be the last time.
 
CurliDiva said:
So, DH tried to buy several bath products for me from amazon (sweet gesture) BUT when they arrived the jars seemed half-used, bath salts which were supposedly lavender-scent smelled nothing like lavender and was very powdery, and nothing was sealed or even seemed tightly closed. I tried to explain gently (of course) that while I appreciate his gesture but I do not trust the integrity of these products and would not be using them especially while pregnant. I dump half of the half-empty jar of bath salts into the toilet and it fizzed up like Alka-Seltzer! Was I wrong? :(
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Me and FH would've just joked about this. Would've tagged team writing a scathing letter to Amazon, joked about dirty people we know who would probably still use it lmao, joked about selling our amzn shares cuz of it, etc. I mean... he would've seen the bad products, too. He got eyes, he know it's a screw up on their part. No, you shouldn't feel bad. And neither should he. Amazon should feel bad.
 
CurliDiva said:
So, DH tried to buy several bath products for me from amazon (sweet gesture) BUT when they arrived the jars seemed half-used, bath salts which were supposedly lavender-scent smelled nothing like lavender and was very powdery, and nothing was sealed or even seemed tightly closed. I tried to explain gently (of course) that while I appreciate his gesture but I do not trust the integrity of these products and would not be using them especially while pregnant. I dump half of the half-empty jar of bath salts into the toilet and it fizzed up like Alka-Seltzer! Was I wrong? :(
Click to expand...

I would have thanked him, gushed about the nice gesture and how sweet it was, and then showed him where he can purchase if he wants to try again.
 
CurliDiva said:
So, DH tried to buy several bath products for me from amazon (sweet gesture) BUT when they arrived the jars seemed half-used, bath salts which were supposedly lavender-scent smelled nothing like lavender and was very powdery, and nothing was sealed or even seemed tightly closed. I tried to explain gently (of course) that while I appreciate his gesture but I do not trust the integrity of these products and would not be using them especially while pregnant. I dump half of the half-empty jar of bath salts into the toilet and it fizzed up like Alka-Seltzer! Was I wrong? :(
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No you weren’t wrong at all. It seems like you did it in the best possible way and I’m sure he understoood
 
Brwnbeauti said:
I was nervous too.
What are your concerns? If you don’t mind sharing them.
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I'm conflicted on this topic...

I'm uncomfortable with being so open and vulnerable with a stranger. I realize that rapport could build over time, but ultimately, I really just wish I didn't have to involve a stranger.

What were your concerns? Were you able to put those aside and see someone? If yes, how's it going? What changed your mind?
 
acapnleo said:
I'm conflicted on this topic...

I'm uncomfortable with being so open and vulnerable with a stranger. I realize that rapport could build over time, but ultimately, I really just wish I didn't have to involve a stranger.

What were your concerns? Were you able to put those aside and see someone? If yes, how's it going? What changed your mind?
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Good therapists slowly earn your trust. Share what you feel comfortable sharing. Over time you will open up more and more if you feel safe.
 
acapnleo said:
I'm conflicted on this topic...

I'm uncomfortable with being so open and vulnerable with a stranger. I realize that rapport could build over time, but ultimately, I really just wish I didn't have to involve a stranger.

What were your concerns? Were you able to put those aside and see someone? If yes, how's it going? What changed your mind?
Click to expand...
I was very concerned with how she would feel about me because of what I needed to discuss. I didn’t know if I’d feel comfortable crying in front of a stranger but that wasn’t really a choice- I was darn near snotty filling out the initial questionnaire. I have. I’ve gone twice. It’s going well. I feel lighter. There are things that I don’t want to share with anyone who has to be in social situations with my family. I don’t want anyone’s perception of various family members to become skewed because of my personal experiences. I didn’t want to have to explain why I was willing to forgive certain things. I wanted to finally say some things aloud.
Keeping it bottled in was hurting me and stopping my personal growth.
 
Brwnbeauti said:
I was very concerned with how she would feel about me because of what I needed to discuss. I didn’t know if I’d feel comfortable crying in front of a stranger but that wasn’t really a choice- I was darn near snotty filling out the initial questionnaire. I have. I’ve gone twice. It’s going well. I feel lighter. There are things that I don’t want to share with anyone who has to be in social situations with my family. I don’t want anyone’s perception of various family members to become skewed because of my personal experiences. I didn’t want to have to explain why I was willing to forgive certain things. I wanted to finally say some things aloud.
Keeping it bottled in was hurting me and stopping my personal growth.
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Those are great points, thank you for sharing :)
 
Dh has had a LOT on his plate lately. So I decided I would get gas for my car. Welp it's hard to break a habit of depending on him to get gas. I meant to go Sunday. :look:

Got in my car this morning praying I had enough gas to get to the station so ds could fill me up. :look:

I have a full tank of gas.

#marriedlife :2inlove:
 
CurliDiva said:
So, DH tried to buy several bath products for me from amazon (sweet gesture) BUT when they arrived the jars seemed half-used, bath salts which were supposedly lavender-scent smelled nothing like lavender and was very powdery, and nothing was sealed or even seemed tightly closed. I tried to explain gently (of course) that while I appreciate his gesture but I do not trust the integrity of these products and would not be using them especially while pregnant. I dump half of the half-empty jar of bath salts into the toilet and it fizzed up like Alka-Seltzer! Was I wrong? :(
Click to expand...

I would never have heard the end of that. When hubby buys me things he literally will monitor when I use it or wear it. I'm so old fashion that I like my old comfy things. He bought me a MK purse one time and it was nice but too big to carry all the time. The man bought up how many times he has seen me carry it. He got me a watch three years ago that is still sitting in the box. I wear my favorite one he got me from years ago that I like. I don't make a fuss over things, but his feelings get hurt when he doesn't see me using things or wearing. If I get a gift, he will be the first to say, "I better not see you with abc when you don't wear abc I got you!" He drives me nuts with things he gets me!
 
So we've been in our new house since December and we have 3 extra rooms so we decided that it would be a good idea to let his 2 childhood friends move in until the baby comes and we can save extra money. It has been good, we really like them and they help around the house and all kinds of stuff.
So recently, one of them got a new gf. I've been really nice and friendly to her. This girl been getting on my nerves lately though. Idk if it's because I'm pregnant and moody lol. but it just pissed me off that she noticed stuff about my husband like his haircut, stuff he does around the house. Asking him about little projects he does. She doesn't work and only goes to school so sometimes when I'm at work, she's here. I'm not worried about it because my husband may be a lot of things, but he is very loyal to me. She is also far from my husband's type and I know for suuuure he's nowhere near attracted to her even if he were single, but it just bothers me that I think she's attracted to him. Men are so naive and don't realize little things that stupid girls do until you point it out to them:drunk: His solution for me was well just quit work and be a stay at home mom.:lachen: I'm not ready for that just yet..
She also added him on FB and didn't add me! WTF. Idk if it's immature of me to get angry at that or what. But after that happened, I told her bf that I didn't appreciate that and that it's disrespectful for a young girl to try to be friendly with a married man who also has a child on the way. I also said my husband doesn't need anymore f'n friends so tell her to get her own friends :look:. He told me the next day that he spoke to her about it and that she didn't mean anything by it and she will add me on FB. Like girl you missed my whole point. I don't wanna be your friend either :rolleyes: Just stay away from him. He doesn't like no booty no booby little pale girls with bad skin like you so go away :look: These pale girls either don't get it or don't care and love to play innocent. Girl skip me with that. I'm too pregnant and feisty for you wench. Try me. :cool:
End of rant...:lachen:
 
melahnee said:
So we've been in our new house since December and we have 3 extra rooms so we decided that it would be a good idea to let his 2 childhood friends move in until the baby comes and we can save extra money. It has been good, we really like them and they help around the house and all kinds of stuff.
So recently, one of them got a new gf. I've been really nice and friendly to her. This girl been getting on my nerves lately though. Idk if it's because I'm pregnant and moody lol. but it just pissed me off that she noticed stuff about my husband like his haircut, stuff he does around the house. Asking him about little projects he does. She doesn't work and only goes to school so sometimes when I'm at work, she's here. I'm not worried about it because my husband may be a lot of things, but he is very loyal to me. She is also far from my husband's type and I know for suuuure he's nowhere near attracted to her even if he were single, but it just bothers me that I think she's attracted to him. Men are so naive and don't realize little things that stupid girls do until you point it out to them:drunk: His solution for me was well just quit work and be a stay at home mom.:lachen: I'm not ready for that just yet..
She also added him on FB and didn't add me! WTF. Idk if it's immature of me to get angry at that or what. But after that happened, I told her bf that I didn't appreciate that and that it's disrespectful for a young girl to try to be friendly with a married man who also has a child on the way. I also said my husband doesn't need anymore f'n friends so tell her to get her own friends :look:. He told me the next day that he spoke to her about it and that she didn't mean anything by it and she will add me on FB. Like girl you missed my whole point. I don't wanna be your friend either :rolleyes: Just stay away from him. He doesn't like no booty no booby little pale girls with bad skin like you so go away :look: These pale girls either don't get it or don't care and love to play innocent. Girl skip me with that. I'm too pregnant and feisty for you wench. Try me. :cool:
End of rant...:lachen:
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Pale meaning she's white?
 
Dee-Licious said:
@melahnee does her boyfriend not work also the reasons she’s at your house during the daytime? Is she coming by when he’s not at home?

When these grown folks moving out? :look:
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@melahnee I’d kick the childhood friend and his girlfriend out of my house. That woman should not be in your home alone. Ever. That is your home, not his. He is a renter that must respect your space and your rules. I don’t even understand how this is happening.
 
No no she is only around when he is!! I would go insane if she tried to come around without him. My husband wouldn't allow that either. I feel bad trying to just kick him out though, I'm not that mean. And she has come around less since I had the talk with him lol, i scared her away i think. My husband spoke to him about it too and told him it's inappropriate. And yes she is white. Im not worried about her at all trust me guys. She has sorta disappeared ever since this happened and I know she won't try anything again or else she will hear from me directly. And this idiot just lost his job which is why he is home sorta often but he has been home less since my big blow up too.

@Leeda.the.Paladin @hopeful @qchelle @Dee-Licious
 
melahnee said:
No no she is only around when he is!! I would go insane if she tried to come around without him. My husband wouldn't allow that either. I feel bad trying to just kick him out though, I'm not that mean. And she has come around less since I had the talk with him lol, i scared her away i think. My husband spoke to him about it too and told him it's inappropriate. And yes she is white. Im not worried about her at all trust me guys. She has sorta disappeared ever since this happened and I know she won't try anything again or else she will hear from me directly. And this idiot just lost his job which is why he is home sorta often but he has been home less since my big blow up too.

@Leeda.the.Paladin @hopeful @qchelle @Dee-Licious
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Okay! How he gonna pay rent with no job? Sounds like a good reason for him to move on without you being mean. :look:
 
DH is so petty. He came last week to take the baby for the weekend. I was living life. I think he expected me to be in a corner crying. Life goes on. Sooo he decided that he left his vitamins (thst he never takes) and that he should take them home to his mother’s house. He also asked me for his router. He also took the extension cord. Ummm bruh. Everything in this house is mine. If it’s not mine I bought it with your money so it’s still mine. Take your little trinkets and get on down son. :rolleyes:

He left and kept texting me about how he made it safely and just random convo. I was polite. But cut it short because I don’t see the point.

I don’t get him. It’s like he is a mind puzzle. Then he keeps having his mother call me and say he really loves you sooooo much. And if Im going to file for divorce and I shouldn’t. I should wait at least two years to see if he comes around because he really loves me. :look:
 
I dropped my iPad and it shattered. Like small pieces of glass falling off. He calls and I allow myself to vulnerable. I was really sad- not that I’m attached to the item, but it was my wedding gift from him so I was emotional.
He comes home and he’s like back up your iPad. Then he hands me a newer one. :2inlove:
 
Things have been sucking more than usual lately. Plus I haven't been feeling well and I'm realizing just how much things have changed. Before he'd actually try to make me feel better, but not it's like he can't be bothered. Fine. I don't care anymore.

I asked him to buy me something as a congratulatory gift for getting an A in my last class and he said he doesn't have any money to spend because he's been buying cryptocurrency. Cool. Glad I know where my happiness is on his list of priorities.
 
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