Married Ladies Random Thoughts

mrselle said:
Men can't hold out as long as women when it comes to this kind of stuff. I'd keep on doing me, smiling, happy, eating good, looking good, living life. He'll cave in by tomorrow. But don't listen to me. I'm petty. Lol.
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He broke last night. I went to the gym for 7pm Zumba class (usually I’m home by then). He blew my phone and sent a text like what’s wrong with your phone:spinning:
 
Some random thoughts:

I met my husband when I was 17 and he was 19. I was a senior in high school. Young, skinny, no worries, no kids, no job, carefree as you wanna be.

Men really do have this delusion that we will remain that same "kid" they met. Looking at him all dreamy and stuff. Whatever! I'm a 45 year old grown woman now. Kids, stressful job, household, AND caregiver to an ill husband. Ain't nobody got time for dreamy eyes! :lol:

We aren't in danger of divorce, but we've had to have some discussions about thangs. He understands that I'm not coming home to cook everyday. I used to try to do this back in my 20s and 30s. Youth had me crazy thinking I was superwoman.

In my "old" age, I learned to take care of me. Cooking was a huge sticking point, but he got over it and is still alive. Our compromise - he cooks the meat, I make the sides (if needed) when I get home. I'm better at it and the meat is what takes all the prep and cooking time.

I've been off for Christmas / New Years and have only cooked maybe 4 times. We ate out and ordered through Uber Eats. It was awesome! Dh had a few moments (nobody's perfect), but he let me have my time to really rest like I deserved.

We love each other, no doubt about that. However, I find myself nodding to most issues the ladies post.

That's all. Happy New Year ladies! :)
 
sunnieb said:
Some random thoughts:

I met my husband when I was 17 and he was 19. I was a senior in high school. Young, skinny, no worries, no kids, no job, carefree as you wanna be.

Men really do have this delusion that we will remain that same "kid" they met. Looking at him all dreamy and stuff. Whatever! I'm a 45 year old grown woman now. Kids, stressful job, household, AND caregiver to an ill husband. Ain't nobody got time for dreamy eyes! :lol:

We aren't in danger of divorce, but we've had to have some discussions about thangs. He understands that I'm not coming home to cook everyday. I used to try to do this back in my 20s and 30s. Youth had me crazy thinking I was superwoman.

In my "old" age, I learned to take care of me. Cooking was a huge sticking point, but he got over it and is still alive. Our compromise - he cooks the meat, I make the sides (if needed) when I get home. I'm better at it and the meat is what takes all the prep and cooking time.

I've been off for Christmas / New Years and have only cooked maybe 4 times. We ate out and ordered through Uber Eats. It was awesome! Dh had a few moments (nobody's perfect), but he let me have my time to really rest like I deserved.

We love each other, no doubt about that. However, I find myself nodding to most issues the ladies post.

That's all. Happy New Year ladies! :)
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I would cook every day except Friday. Cook breakfast every Saturday and Sunday. Start cooking Sunday dinner on Saturday. Would also find myself cooking breakfast on the days I would be off work. It took me realizing I had 9 days off and had cooked breakfast 6 of those days along with dinner to say WTF! I would find myself cleaning and bending over scrubbing toilets and bathtubs and such. This all while going to work everyday...No wonder I was always tired. I had re access what the hell I was doing and I cut it ALL the way back. Then my gf had the nerve to get on me about my hubby washing his own clothes. Say what now???!!!!! Who said being a wife meant doing the cooking, cleaning, laundry and sorts. Why is it men assume that women automatically have these assigned responsibilities? Life is so different in my home now!:lachen:
 
Dh has to do some press for his company. He had his makeup done :lachen:
He said “The lady put that little stuff on the thing and she put that eye makeup stuff on me then she put that other stuff on me. Then she put that powder on my face like pat pat” :lachen::lachen::lachen:

Oh yeah, then he gone say “I felt like Beyoncé or something”
Into the corner sir
 
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CafedeBelleza said:
Dh has to do some press for his company. He had his makeup done :lachen:
He said “The lady put that little stuff on the thing and she put that eye makeup stuff on me then she put that other stuff on me. Then she put that powder on my face like pat pat” :lachen::lachen::lachen:

Oh yeah, then he gone say “I felt like Beyoncé or something”
Into the corner sir
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200.webp
:lachen::lachen::lachen::lachen:
 
Farida said:
DH had a "come to Jesus" moment on Christmas Eve. It always pays to marry someone who believes he cannot do better than being married to you and that is quite the privilege to have you. LOL. He has never believed me when I tell him if I were to die or leave him he'd be wifed up in no time.

I was so fed up and in the interest of my health I had decided 2018 was not the year I was not going to allow people to stress me out. But why wait till 2018? I started in Dec 2018. And he noticed I was just carrying on with life, doing me, while he was moping and feeling sorry for himself. I didn't really engage him in any conversation beyond what was necessary because I was sick of fighting and playing the guessing game. And then we went to our friends' and I know he was nervous they would sense something was up and they are not shy about calling him out because they consider him family. On Friday I could tell he was trying to get out of going. He started by claiming he was sick but he could not tell me what mystery illness he had. But on Saturday we went and then on Sunday he told me he was terrified I was going to leave him.

He was pretty much like he'd do ANYTHING. And not the "whatever you want" type of BS he was giving me before. I already see a marked difference in the way he is behaving and talking to me. We still have a lot to work on so I'm not going to assume things are awesome but at least we seem to be out of the rut for now. Unfortunately we are going to miss our next retrouvaille session because I have to have surgery (cannot change the date). So we'll see. We may stick with the same group and attend the next one or we may have to look for another retrouvaille group to join.
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It's a bad look when they take you for granted, so good for you!
 
syze6 said:
I would cook every day except Friday. Cook breakfast every Saturday and Sunday. Start cooking Sunday dinner on Saturday. Would also find myself cooking breakfast on the days I would be off work. It took me realizing I had 9 days off and had cooked breakfast 6 of those days along with dinner to say WTF! I would find myself cleaning and bending over scrubbing toilets and bathtubs and such. This all while going to work everyday...No wonder I was always tired. I had re access what the hell I was doing and I cut it ALL the way back. Then my gf had the nerve to get on me about my hubby washing his own clothes. Say what now???!!!!! Who said being a wife meant doing the cooking, cleaning, laundry and sorts. Why is it men assume that women automatically have these assigned responsibilities? Life is so different in my home now!:lachen:
Click to expand...

I know! If dude expects you to be a housewife he'd best provide you the lifestyle not to work.
 
syze6 said:
I would cook every day except Friday. Cook breakfast every Saturday and Sunday. Start cooking Sunday dinner on Saturday. Would also find myself cooking breakfast on the days I would be off work. It took me realizing I had 9 days off and had cooked breakfast 6 of those days along with dinner to say WTF! I would find myself cleaning and bending over scrubbing toilets and bathtubs and such. This all while going to work everyday...No wonder I was always tired. I had re access what the hell I was doing and I cut it ALL the way back. Then my gf had the nerve to get on me about my hubby washing his own clothes. Say what now???!!!!! Who said being a wife meant doing the cooking, cleaning, laundry and sorts. Why is it men assume that women automatically have these assigned responsibilities? Life is so different in my home now!:lachen:
Click to expand...


I told my husband that I am not going to have all of the responsibilities of the household, children and work. We have a cleaning service come every two weeks and I cook twice a week :look: . I plan to do better about the cooking. Maybe up it to three times a week but I am not cooking on the weekends. Saturday’s and Sunday’s we eat out. Every now and then I may cook Sunday dinner but it depends on how I feel. If I have learned one thing in marriage and about most men is that they will let you run yourself to the ground taking care of their needs and not blink twice. No mam. Being a wife and mother will not have me looking all haggard.
Oh and you aren’t the only one- I don’t wash DH clothes, I wash mine and the baby’s clothes only- everyone else is on their own.
 
I’ve been mulling putting myself out there for employment, someone I interviewed with previously reached out to me. The pay and benefits are a big draw but it would drastically change our home life. After this last miscarriage I’m not mentally there to try for another kid anytime in the near future. But that could change. So I have to consider the two kids I do have.

The money is calling me though y’all. I can’t even lie.
 
I wish DH would settle on a (lucrative) hobby: either learning more IT languages or learning about investments. I've supported his music, and though I would never take that away from him, I get excited when his attention turns towards the other two.
 
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