Married Ladies Random Thoughts

Never mind. I think I'm just spoiled and living in fairytale land.

Ima just pray on it and hope one day he gives me more of what I really want...spontaneous adventure seeking thoughtful stuff.
 
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SamandI said:
You seem so thoughtful in what you plan for your DH. My SO is getting a card from publix with his own money :look: that's as far as I've gotten.
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Thank you! I try! I can't take all the credit. I'm a Pinterest gal and a teacher so I'm always doing this stuff for my kids too. His favorite thing is ice cream. His favorite drink is root beer. So I wanted to make him an "adult" root beer float to set the mood. :toocool::2inlove:

Ice cream. Alcohol. Whipped cream. Chocolate sauce. Lingerie. Can't get better than that right. :spinning:
 
So this weekend was damn near perfect. We celebrated 22 years of marriage the way we do (dinner, movies, gifts). So sweet! I even missed the premier of TWD because we were so in the moment yesterday and just wanted to snuggle with my honey.

Well, this morning he started off with a wild hair up his ass and I wasn't having it. He even had a doctor's appointment to go to and yet here I sit - I always go to his appointments with him when I'm off work. I mean, this is the kind of ish that gets me. You wake up in a foul mood. Cool. Don't try to spread that ish on me. I ain't the one. It's like he act like he just met me sometimes.

Don't we all say that women are emotional creatures? Alrighty then. You wake up spewing off bs, you get bs in return.

Great way to start off the day after our 22nd anniversary. Whomp. Whomp.
 
Is it normal to feel stressed for no reason?

My bf wants to get engaged this year (it's either going to be on our anniversary or some time thereabouts I believe) and he wants to get married next year (date tentatively set). I feel stressed. He's awesome but the concept of being permanently attached to him for the rest of my life is stressing me out. I'm getting cold feet before it's time to get cold feet. I want to run away. He's busy looking at real estate and making pre wedding prep (e.g. he's catholic but doesn't go to church so he's going now in preparation for our engagement blessing and wedding - the priest isn't going to marry unless you're a regular attendee for at least 6 months).

I'm thinking of crazy get away plans like migrating so we'll be forced to put it on hold. It's making me not enjoy my relationship... no one knows how I feel... Is this normal?
 
LiftedUp said:
Is it normal to feel stressed for no reason?

My bf wants to get engaged this year (it's either going to be on our anniversary or some time thereabouts I believe) and he wants to get married next year (date tentatively set). I feel stressed. He's awesome but the concept of being permanently attached to him for the rest of my life is stressing me out. I'm getting cold feet before it's time to get cold feet. I want to run away. He's busy looking at real estate and making pre wedding prep (e.g. he's catholic but doesn't go to church so he's going now in preparation for our engagement blessing and wedding - the priest isn't going to marry unless you're a regular attendee for at least 6 months).

I'm thinking of crazy get away plans like migrating so we'll be forced to put it on hold. It's making me not enjoy my relationship... no one knows how I feel... Is this normal?
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I'm not sure. Do you know why you feel this way?
 
LiftedUp said:
I feel like my life is changing and I don't want it to...
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I felt this way once pre-DH and ended up breaking the engagement. I said yes because I felt pressured and I was young/naive.

I think if you feel this way something bigger is going on that you need to address before getting engaged. Overall satisfaction with the relationship, etc.

Whatever you choose, make sure you're 100% comfortable. This is one of the biggest decisions you'll ever make.
 
So I decided what I am going to do for our anniversary surprise. I found a very nice bed and breakfast about about 30 minutes from home. Dh took off next Friday just because, and I did too. He thinks next Thursday is going to be a Wii game night and Friday we will just chill but I booked the B&B. It is beautiful, it's one a lake and our room is on the 3rd floor all by itself. I just have to find a reason why I need to drop him off to work. Maybe I can say I am going to get his oil changed? He gone know I'm lying :lol:. ( Give me ideas for a reason I would need to drop him off to work) I want to pick him up from, blind fold him and drive him to the property. I am going to already have our bags in the car. I am going to see if I can go the B&B earlier that day and get the room ready And I want to have the room decorated like this with balloons.

upload_2016-2-17_8-9-20.jpeg

Then on each balloon I want to put why I love him and put certain examples of why I am appreciative of him. Then I want to have rose petals in the room like this:

upload_2016-2-17_8-16-28.jpeg

Then Dinner on the lake

0877e74576cd55f1301dbf11c30c4735.jpg



I am so excited. I hope I don't spill the beans:look:

He is just so special to me and I want to show him that....
 
Miss617 said:
@LiftedUp You don't seem excited at all, and even in your initial post you said your bf is "awesome," but nothing about loving him. It doesn't sound like you're on the same page as he is and that's not fair to either one of you. I think you need to let him know how you feel because it seems like he's making all of these plans in vain.
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Am I not excited about getting married... no. Maybe in 2018 but definitely not 2017. I told him how I felt about the rush to go look at houses etc. and he said that he understands how I feel and he feels the same (so he says) but that we need somewhere to live so it's something that has to be done.
 
LiftedUp said:
Am I not excited about getting married... no. Maybe in 2018 but definitely not 2017. I told him how I felt about the rush to go look at houses etc. and he said that he understands how I feel and he feels the same (so he says) but that we need somewhere to live so it's something that has to be done.
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Take control now while you can. Slow everything down so that you are comfortable. If you buy a house too soon you will feel trapped. There is no reason to rush things. Sounds like you just want another year to gather yourself. Don't let his niceness or awesomeness blind you or guilt you into doing something you aren't ready for. Really "nice" people can be the worst at getting their way, be careful.
 
LiftedUp said:
Am I not excited about getting married... no. Maybe in 2018 but definitely not 2017. I told him how I felt about the rush to go look at houses etc. and he said that he understands how I feel and he feels the same (so he says) but that we need somewhere to live so it's something that has to be done.
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OK, so it's more the timeline than actually getting married? It's good that he wants to be settled first because looking for a place to live as newlyweds is not the business, but you want him to pump the brakes a little bit.
 
hopeful said:
Take control now while you can. Slow everything down so that you are comfortable. If you buy a house too soon you will feel trapped. There is no reason to rush things. Sounds like you just want another year to gather yourself. Don't let his niceness or awesomeness blind you or guilt you into doing something you aren't ready for. Really "nice" people can be the worst at getting their way, be careful.
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His sister wants us to move in some houses that are being built close to where she lives (I don't like the location - too far from the city, plus it's close to an undesirable area). She gave him the information already...

Miss617 said:
OK, so it's more the timeline than actually getting married? It's good that he wants to be settled first because looking for a place to live as newlyweds is not the business, but you want him to pump the brakes a little bit.
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His parents offered to give us money for the wedding, plus requested that we get married in their church.

I feel like I'm drowning. I feel worse now that it's not a regular feeling or thought among you married ladies.
 
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