Length VS Play... Where do YOU Stand?

[Sianna]

Hello all, I have yet another question I'd like to get some opinions on. And as I mentioned before, I am new to this forum so if a similar question has already been asked, please forgive the duplicate question!

Anyway, I have seen ladies, not only here but on other forums and on Youtube that are willing to live in wigs, weaves and other protective styles for the sake of preserving every inch of hair that grows out of their scalps. While I can respect and understand this to a certain degree, I don't understand at what point the protective styling ends and the person enjoys the fruit of their labors and actually wears the hair they have so meticulously protected and grown out.

Even though my hair has always been really short, and even though I REALLY want it to grow and become longer than it has ever been, I find myself unwilling to LIVE in protective styles in order to gain or retain any certain amount of length. I mean, I can see doing it for a month or two at a time, giving my hair a break, and then putting it away again into protective styling. This is something I will probably have to do in the winter because that is a very critical time for my hair. But I just would not want to have to do this for years at a time in order to have longer hair.

I guess the bottom line is that I'd rather have APL hair and be able to actually wear it out, 70% of the time than to have MBL hair, and have it hidden beneath a weave/wig or in some other protective style 80% of the time.

That's my stand!

Now what's yours?

 

[JustSimplyTish]

I want to have longer hair, yes.....

My hair grew long when it was relaxed and I really didn't have a problem with it...I would cut it short...grow it out...just depended on my mood.....I went natural for different reasons other than having long hair....But I would certainly not be upset if my hair did not grow all down my back....But I would be upset if it wasn't healthy

That is why I don't really have hair length goals just yet...even though it is hard not to looking at all the lovely tresses on this forum....

I am just not a weave, wig etc type person....I commend those who can wear those protective styles...I am just not one of them....

I will probably always wear my hair out or in a ponytail for the rest of my life because I am lazy and just not fussy about my hair so much

I will check back when I get more length ...this may change

 

[My Friend]

Great question Sianna. I choose 'Play" but then on the other hand erplexed

 

[Firstborn2]

protective styles don't bother me, the less I have to do to my hair the better, the only time it has become an issue is when DH wanna see something different so I have to keep the peace. I want to get to TBL one day, I'm not in a rush...

 

[My Friend]

@Tish....I like the photo of you in your siggy.

 

[YaniraNaturally]

Preferably half and half. I keep my hair braided for about 7 months out of the year (when I'm away at school) anyway. Also I get tired of doing my hair and actually relish the moments when I have the luxury of sprinting out of my place in under 15 minutes.

When I reach my goal length I think I'll probably do a month on a month off. About 4 days after a wash my hair starts getting oily. So I tend to bun at least two/three days a week already in an attempt to stretch my washes to a week.

 

[SEMO]

I've always been a fan of wearing buns (even before starting my hair journey), so it's no hardship for me to wear them most of the time.

Maybe if I were great at styling (which I'm not) it would feel more restrictive not to do fun, creative things with my hair. But I've learned to stick to what I know.

 

[belldandy]

I am willing to ps for 6 months straight; if i dont get dramatic results from that i am back to rollersetting and wearing it down.

Also, I am willing to compromise also after this trail period...maybe only wearing it down on special occasions and weekends, wearing a silk scarf around my shoulders during the cold months...

but long hair is more important to me, and i think once hair gets to a certain length your protective styles start looking more elegant and you like wearing them

 

[HappilyLiberal]

I picked other.

I am growing my hair long SO I can wear nice-looking updos and other protective styles.

 

[AimWard]

I chose other. For me, most protective styles become counter productive after a few weeks due to my fine and fragile edges. I wear my hair out 80% of the time and I have no problems retaining length but I don't play in my hair or do any sorts of complicated or high manipulation styles. I simply leave it be. My hair responds best when it's allowed to be out with very low manipulation. So I guess, I can achieve the length with my hair out as long as I don't play in it.

 

[MrsHdrLe]

I really don't like how I look with my hair up now, but if I had my desired lenth and thickness, I would love to have huge elegant updos and buns. So to answer your question, I would rather have length THEN play sometimes. But I hate to gain all that lenght and lose it all from overplay.

 

[NaturalBoss]

I wear protective styles everyday. I've always been a ponytail/bun type of person. I rarely wear my hair down. I'm lazy...

 

[virtuenow]

I am anti-protective style and never do ps' on purpose. I only (accidentally) wear them for the style. Definitely never a bun or anything like that. I don't like the way most ps look. It sounds like another trap, as if black women cannot grow their hair unless they hide it away and never wear their hair. It seems to be born of the same idea as we "have to relax" or have to wear straight hair to look good. So the next best thing is to hide the hair altogether. People of any other race can wear their hair out and grow hair down to their waist and so can we!

 

[Ijanei]

I love to mess around in my hair to much to do a PS...I would rather have healthy hair at a shorter length (wait let me think on that.....)

ok i rephrase, I would love to have medium length healthy hair than long and always in a PS

I just dont look to good in a bun, but pin-ups work

 

[Filmatic]

I actually like wigs and weaves. I like being Sasha today, Senorita tomorrow. So it's no problem for me to wear them. Add that it takes less time to get ready and it's a good.

However, nothing can take the place of my hair underneath. I take a break from wigs and wear it out more and more. I just like option. I said when I'm APL I'll really start experimenting with styles, so it's more important to protect now. I only have a couple of inches so it won't be a lifetime.

 

[Sianna]

I am glad I decided to add the "Other" option on this because some of you have mentioned things that I did not previously consider.

Thank you to everyone who's responded thus far!

I am anti-protective style and never do ps' on purpose. I only (accidentally) wear them for the style. Definitely never a bun or anything like that. I don't like the way most ps look. It sounds like another trap, as if black women cannot grow their hair unless they hide it away and never wear their hair. It seems to be born of the same idea as we "have to relax" or have to wear straight hair to look good. So the next best thing is to hide the hair altogether. People of any other race can wear their hair out and grow hair down to their waist and so can we!

See this is along my lines of what I was thinking. For me, protective styling is okay if you actually like the style or if you just want to put your hair away for a while and not have to do something with it every morning, but in my mind it seems almost pointless for anyone to spend so much time hiding their hair in protective styles simply for the purpose of retaining all their length.

It reminds me of this:

"Dunbar was lying motionless on his back again with his eyes staring up at the ceiling like a doll's. He was working hard at increasing his lifespan. He did it by cultivating boredom. Dunbar was working so hard at increasing his lifespan that Yossarian thought he was dead."

-- Joseph Heller, Catch-22

More responses please!

 

[MOTHEROF3NATURALLY]

I want to see what my hair can do.... so i think that the longest hair possible is my vote. Because I have been natural a long time. I had locs for 7 years, and then decieded to do a BC and see what my hair will do without them. Also to see what my hair texture will be like at the longest length possible.

 

[jahzyira]

I used to be in the same boat. I really hated protective styling.... I loved wearing my big pouffy hair down all day every day, but I stayed stuck at bsl/mbl for over 2 years and eventually I lost 4 inches of dead, invisible ends. Needless to say, I think ive gotten the best retention and growth from hiding my hair for the past 10 months. My ends are blunt, my hair is moist, healthy, and I think SOME protective styling is beneficial in the long run.....

 

[Chaosbutterfly]

I'm willing to do what I have to do in order to reach goal length ASAP, including hiding my hair for the next few years. This is not a game.

And that may not make sense to some people, but personally, I'm not concerned with enjoying my hair now. It's not like there's very much to enjoy anyway. I'd rather put my hair away for some years, reach goal on time, and enjoy my hair forever than to actually spend forever trying to grow it out.

And then, I feel like for people who want to achieve longer lengths (WL+) protective styling is inevitable. In today's world, it's just impractical to wear long hair down everyday. It can get caught in car doors, elevator doors, people will grab it, try to cut it, try to burn it, your SO or DH will roll over it in the night, it'll fall into your eyes, it'll get tangled in your purse strap or get caught in your armpit...there are a million and one things that can happen to long hair out there. So eventually, most people will have to make peace with PS's for the sake of their own sanity. It's just a matter of when. :assimilat

 

[Ijanei]

And then, I feel like for people who want to achieve longer lengths (WL+) protective styling is inevitable. In today's world, it's just impractical to wear long hair down everyday. It can get caught in car doors, elevator doors, people will grab it, try to cut it, try to burn it, your SO or DH will roll over it in the night, it'll fall into your eyes, it'll get tangled in your purse strap or get caught in your armpit...there are a million and one things that can happen to long hair out there. So eventually, most people will have to make peace with PS's for the sake of their own sanity. It's just a matter of when

Sorry but that was tooooo funny...wow maybe long hair isnt that cool huh j/k
I want my hair to get caught at least once in something

 

[jupitermoon]

A pony tail or bun doesn't bother me. I have a lot of hair and I'd rather keep it out of the way. I'm not afriad to wear my hair down either. I've never liked weaves, wigs, etc. and have never worn them. I think it becomes problematic when a person reaches the point that they are actually afraid to wear their hair down out of fear of damage. I have no problem taking my hair down and playing in it and I do that quite often. I've taken my buns and updos down at work due to the pain from the heaviness of my hair.

 

[Vshanell]

I'm wearing my hair how I want and whenever I want. I can't be a slave to protective styles. I'd rather enjoy the length now while I'm young. I'll have plenty of time for constant buns later, lol.

 

[Triniwegian]

For someone who has been PS-ing for almost 3 years straight...the novelty is really starting to wear off. As soon as the hot humid summer is over I will start wearing my hair straight at least once a month.
I really can't say whether or not having my hair in a bun for this long has benefited me..probably not because my hair ain't that long.

It all boils down to preference, some people don't like to "do" their hair and constant manipulation can really damage it..I for one is about to be done with the bunning.

 

[curlyninjagirl]

I don't mind protective styles either. Most of the time I just want my hair out of my way. I always wanted long hair though. I'd be content just to feel it swaying down my back in the shower on wash day and to enjoy big buns (hehe...big buns) and ponytails and of course that one time of year I flat iron to see my progress.

 

[NikStarrr]

I'm somewhere in middle. I want my hair to be healthy and I do have length goals. I do have my limits--I refuse to wear wigs, weaves, etc. consistently (Ive thrown one on for a day here and there just for a change of style), I don't think it's wise to RELY on fake hair to grow hair, because what happens when you get the length and stop wearing the fake? How do you really know what your hair does and does not like, etc.? This is what I think leads people to set backs, false hopes, etc. This is just my opinion, and I digress...

For me, my #1 protective style are buns--and do actually like my bun. I've (for the summer) found my middle ground by wearing buns during the week, and then letting my hair down Fri-Sun. This works for me because 1) I don't do much during the week, socially, and 2) I'm not having to "do" too much to my hair either---I have a toddler. haha Plus, I've grown to like the idea that the hair comes out for a reason, you know, like it's my "glory" and it's not always on display or for just everyone to see, unless something significant (I'm out on the town, for ex.) is going on. I can tell my hubby gets a little excited when I bring it out because of this. hehe

 

[Chevelure618]

I do respect all methods, but I think wearing wigs and hiding the hair so much defeats the purpose.

What I do is wear Protective styles when I GET HOME from work when I want to enjoy my hair during the day. Then I'll wear a nice bun for a week or so. I think it is just important to keep the ends moisturized when its out.

I could never use the wig method, I would be too depressing for me.

 

[Vshanell]

I do respect all methods, but I think wearing wigs and hiding the hair so much defeats the purpose.

What I do is wear Protective styles when I GET HOME from work when I want to enjoy my hair during the day. Then I'll wear a nice bun for a week or so. I think it is just important to keep the ends moisturized when its out.

I could never use the wig method, I would be too depressing for me.

I do this too. My hair is always in a protective style at home. When I leave the house it comes down though.

 

[schipperchow1]

I voted other. I do not see the hair growth journey as an either or proposition but as something that should be enjoyed.

As for hairstyles, I do not wear wigs or weaves, never have because I like to wear my own hair & have always played in it. I have hand in hair disease The only braids I wear are either a French braid or 2 Pocahontas' braids. I like to wear a variety of bun styles & use my jeweled hair sticks to dress them up. I also like wearing ponytails - twisted, braided or out. I wear it "out" or "down" too as just another hairstyle option.

 

[NikkiGirl]

I wear protective styles mostly everyday. But the funny thing is years ago when I had what I would call my goal hair I protective styled and didn't know what it was. I never wore wigs or weaves. But my hair was always thick and would frizz easily in the humidity in SC, so I would keep it up. I don't think my hair needs to be done everyday and I think that mentality is why I have mostly always had long hair. I was never doing too much to it. I enjoy it when I want to, but a ponytail is fine for everyday. But I am big into makeup, fashion, nail care, etc and don't only focus on my hair.

 

[beans4reezy]

I am one of those who will live in protective styles until I reach my goals. Last year, between bunning, braiding, and wigs- I was able to retain a crazy amount of length. There will be plenty of time to "play" with my hair- right now, I am too focused on length to care about anything else.