Interracial relationships
- Thread starter Prettymetty
- Start date
DarkJoy
Bent. Not Broken.
Yea. That would be game over for me.
SincerelyJane
New Member
So he's basically hiding you from this butcher? Doesn't he plan to continue a long term working relationship with this man? How long does he plan to keep this going on for? I'm uncomfortable for you.
Lenee925
Well-Known Member
Just now seeing this haha...why so dramatic? Who cares what I think? I would call you pretty messy as well actually. I hope you wouldn't allow yourself to be so offended by what strangers say on a public forum. You've seen me post in here long enough to not try to call me out as a troll and get all catty over a difference of opinion but it's all good.
Yeah, I'm aware, I have been on this site for a long time. I pull white men more than anything but who cares? I have no shame in saying I love seeing colorblind love but I'm not going to 'start a black love' thread just because I feel like stating my preference of black men over white guys. Seems pathetic and super lame given the demographic of this forum.
kupenda
Well-Known Member
I wasnt clear ladies. Im sorry. It was my decision not to tell the butcher. Like I said, he needs them. They were already giving him hell about not dating their daughter. And he and I are still in the beginning of our relationship. Im not bothered Im not convinced I want a long term relationship honestly. He may be leaving the area soon too. Not sure yet
He has never hidden me from anyone. He has never been weird about being affectionate in public. He introduces me as his girlfriend. And he would have no issue with me talking to the butcher. I know that for sure. It was my decision not to tell them. I feel bad now lol. Guess I messed up.
He has never hidden me from anyone. He has never been weird about being affectionate in public. He introduces me as his girlfriend. And he would have no issue with me talking to the butcher. I know that for sure. It was my decision not to tell them. I feel bad now lol. Guess I messed up.
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Crackers Phinn
Either A Blessing Or A Lesson.
Don't feel bad.
Even if you put the race issue aside, the butcher has been trying to put his daughter on your bf. So he's going to feel some kind of way about your bf rolling up with any woman. In the interest of not affecting my man's cash flow, I would have done the same thing you did and not felt any way about it.
Briabiggles
Well-Known Member
ThirdEyeBeauty
Well-Known Member
I don't know what to say about your new relationship.
Although, I have never dated a white man, I have been approached for dates by a handful. I have dated other races of men but mainly Asian--South and East Asian. The East Asian had a business that depended on repeated customers and also had a business in a majority white and less than 1% black town. He quickly and proudly told people I was his woman immediately. He showed PDA although I hated PDA. He basically let the world know I was not out with him for business purposes. I like his boldness. I don't know if he helped or hurt his business but he rarely got off work early--extremely rare.
I could not date a man if he had to make arrangements to fool the crowd.
As for this thread, my life has mainly been an intercultural one more so than interracial. I would guess a primarily interracial relationship challenges the outside world and a primarily intercultural relationship challenges the couple.
kupenda
Well-Known Member
Lucie I live in maryland in the US. He's in the mountains of virginia. The butcher is in the mountains of maryland. Someone out there has horses but they also have a zebra!
Crackers Phinn thank you. Thats where my head was. Im not gonna run the risk of ruining his entire livelihood over some peoples opinions. He's a good guy. Has his head on straight. Great at networking. Thats how he gets his business. My decision wasnt about our relationship, it was about his job. Im not gonna feel bad about it anymore
Crackers Phinn thank you. Thats where my head was. Im not gonna run the risk of ruining his entire livelihood over some peoples opinions. He's a good guy. Has his head on straight. Great at networking. Thats how he gets his business. My decision wasnt about our relationship, it was about his job. Im not gonna feel bad about it anymore
Lucie
Dancin' on sunshine!
@kupenda, wow! A zebra, LOL!
I find that so interesting. Now I want to ask what time he wakes up? Is it a family business? LOL! Don't worry I don't expect you to answer. Farming is something that is so interesting to me. Whenever I go to Haiti, the farmers in the surrounding area let me help out. Hahaha! I think they get a kick out of how happy it makes me.
There's a farm in Queens I go to as well that they teach you how to milk cows, get eggs from chickens. I feel like I was a farmer in my past life. Okay, let me stop derailing. Just love farming. LOL!
I find that so interesting. Now I want to ask what time he wakes up? Is it a family business? LOL! Don't worry I don't expect you to answer. Farming is something that is so interesting to me. Whenever I go to Haiti, the farmers in the surrounding area let me help out. Hahaha! I think they get a kick out of how happy it makes me.
There's a farm in Queens I go to as well that they teach you how to milk cows, get eggs from chickens. I feel like I was a farmer in my past life. Okay, let me stop derailing. Just love farming. LOL!
DarkJoy
Bent. Not Broken.
Me too! Sometimes I'll drive through farm territory here with the windows down to smell that farm smell, with the flimsy excuse to get cheap farmstand produce
Yes, it's manure and animals and stuff smellin' but it's quite soothing 
. You'd think I was 5 years old when I get into the chicken pens & start chasing them around 
OK, enough of the derail...
Lucie
Dancin' on sunshine!
Me too! Sometimes I'll drive through farm territory here with the windows down to smell that farm smell, with the flimsy excuse to get cheap farmstand produce
OK, enough of the derail...
DarkJoy, we really are twins! We should do a farm meet up!
When I leave Haiti I am so sad because I have no rooster to crow. No random goat bleating. No cows gnawing on grass. Just traffic. And whatever else you would not find on a farm.
kupenda
Well-Known Member
Lucie he wakes up around 9ish. Right now he has someone that comes and helps him during the day. But when im there, I feed the bunnies. I also talk to the pigs and the goats. The goats like being scratched like dogs! So do sheep. The pigs are a little moody sometimes. I havent been able to touch them yet but ive got my eye on the babies. Theyre so cute! They also have bees!
Yes, its sorta a family business. He was hired by a family to run the farm while they work. He handles pretty much everything and lives on the property. I dont mind the questions! Ive learned so much from being with him. He got me my own farmhand boots and everything. But im more of a distraction most of the time lol. Chasing the baby pigs and interviewing the goats.
Yes, its sorta a family business. He was hired by a family to run the farm while they work. He handles pretty much everything and lives on the property. I dont mind the questions! Ive learned so much from being with him. He got me my own farmhand boots and everything. But im more of a distraction most of the time lol. Chasing the baby pigs and interviewing the goats.
Especially if it is serious. I would not be messing up his source of income. I don't need to go to any Christmas parties with the butcher
.
kupenda
Well-Known Member
Especially if it is serious. I would not be messing up his source of income. I don't need to go to any Christmas parties with the butcher
Very true. Yeah, its super serious. He's the only butcher.in the area. And thats a 45 minute drive in a different state. They sell the meat from the farm. If it doesnt sell, he doesnt get paid. And my birthday is next weekend soo...
isawstars
Well-Known Member
95% of my relationships have been interracial. I've dealt with racism twice though... Once in high school when a boyfriend of 1 week 
lol broke up with me because his best friend didn't like that I was black. Then my friends started IMing him on AIM/AOL, calling him racist... then that blew up and the principle got involved... it was a crazy mess.
Then after I graduated from College a white guy I was dating had a nosey neighbor who snooped around while I was at his house. The neighbor told his parents and his parents were furious that I was black. His dad said that if we "had black babies" he would never view he or the babies as a part of their family. It was a very emotional day for us... I think I even posted on this site for advice/support... our relationship fell apart after that. Probably for the best, who would want in-laws like that anyways?
But other than that, I typically date white guys. Now that I'm in Northern California I've been dating quite a few middle eastern guys (Israeli, Persian)... it's been fun learning about different cultures and eating different food.
I'm not seriously dating anyone at the moment though. The last date I went on was a with a white guy though.
lol broke up with me because his best friend didn't like that I was black. Then my friends started IMing him on AIM/AOL, calling him racist... then that blew up and the principle got involved... it was a crazy mess.Then after I graduated from College a white guy I was dating had a nosey neighbor who snooped around while I was at his house. The neighbor told his parents and his parents were furious that I was black. His dad said that if we "had black babies" he would never view he or the babies as a part of their family. It was a very emotional day for us... I think I even posted on this site for advice/support... our relationship fell apart after that. Probably for the best, who would want in-laws like that anyways?
But other than that, I typically date white guys. Now that I'm in Northern California I've been dating quite a few middle eastern guys (Israeli, Persian)... it's been fun learning about different cultures and eating different food.
I'm not seriously dating anyone at the moment though. The last date I went on was a with a white guy though.
isawstars
Well-Known Member
sweetvi
My roommate is also Persian so she gave me a lot of insight on dating a Persian lol. This is what I've learned from her:
Persians are very family oriented. Parents prefer their child to date/marry another Persian but my generation (20-somethings) are beginning to date outside their race regularly. Many of them struggle to live the life they want because culturally their parents tell them what to do (what kind of job to get, where to live, who to marry, who to break up with).
The Persian guy I dated adores my kinky curly hair (I was surprised because straight hair is very prevalent in my city) and he was a lot more chivalrous than other Californians I've dated (I'm from the south so I miss that trait in men). He also told me that he doesn't want to introduce me to his family unless we're dating for a long period time which kind of concerned me, but my roommate told me that is typical of Persians because that is a hugeee deal to them. She is actually dating a guy and never invites him to family events because she is uncertain if she wants to marry him.
kupenda
Well-Known Member
I agree with not wanting to bring guys around the family.the next guy my extended family meets will be someone im planning to marry. Current guy has introduced me to his family already and wants to take me home to meet his mother in another state. To me, that's a big deal. So he and I gotta have that"where this thing going" convo. Maybe this weekend.
Prettymetty
Natural/4b/medium-coarse
That's a big deal kupenda. I remember I was scared to meet his mom. The first thing out of her mouth was "we don't allow interracial dating in this family". I looked over at her black husband and said oh ok. Lol. His mom and stepdad are a trip. The stepdad tells more black jokes than anyone I ever met. Hes like a younger more thugged out version of Uncle Ruckus from Boondocks
girlonfire
Well-Known Member
Tha hale?! May i inquire more about that age difference?? Like how did y'all meet and how did it end (i hope I'm not crossing a boudary, i mean no disrespect!)
PinkyPromise
Well-Known Member
My SO of two years is white. My first bf was mixed (black/white) and I had a boo in fourth grade that was white. When I moved and got out of private school I started dating black guys, but that didn't work out too well for me. I'm too eccentric for most black men. I grew up listening to Elton John, The Backstreet Boys, Train and Sum 41 so we don't really click or have many things in common.
kupenda
Well-Known Member
Guys! He took me out for birthday this past weekend. It was awesome. Best birthday ever! Its clear he really likes me. But im not sure if theres a future with this. I enjoy him. But I dont have that craving to rush things with him or try to mentally plan our future. Is that bad? Or is it maturity? Idk. Im taking it one day at a time
DarkJoy
Bent. Not Broken.
That's maturity. Perhaps a reflexion of his maturity because as women we seem to pick up on our partners.
All that new fire is adolescent and early 20s hormones. Slow and steady wins the race.
It could also be the start of building a strong friendship foundation first.. Good stuff.
All that new fire is adolescent and early 20s hormones. Slow and steady wins the race.
It could also be the start of building a strong friendship foundation first.. Good stuff.
Farida
Well-Known Member
My friend is marrying a Persian guy and he is Muslim. Most of the Persians in my area don't seem religious at all.
CurlyMoo
Well-Known Member
Girl please don't feel bad. Pick your battles, this is business. I would have done the same thing. But I'm sneaky like that. Your relationship is not the butchers business and the butcher deserves to be left out of the loop, until one day he looks up and see's his most successful customer has a Black gf.
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