I'm sick and tired of being SINGLE!

[Crystalicequeen123]

Is it just me?? Am I the only one??

UGh....The weather is getting nicer, the birds are chirping, and I'm seeing all of my friends dating their new boyfriends, and even the guy friend I had a mad crush on is now dating someone and to be honest it's killing me. Plus, I'm hearing about all these weddings (there have been 3 weddings I've known about w/in the last 3 months so far!) and "new couples" sprouting up and I'm thinking..."is there something in the water??" UGh! Sometimes I get sick of being single! Anybody else feel the same way sometimes? I know being positive is the best way to attract good things and good people into your life, but right now I just don't feel like being positive anymore.

Sorry.... I don't mean to be a downer to anyone else who's living the "single life" and loving it, but I just had to get that out there. I guess I'm just feeling kind of bummed today. I just received an e-mail from one of my girlfriends (who was single right along with me for a long time until a few months ago) showing me pictures that she and her boyfriend took at some party last weekend. I'm happy for her and everything because he really is a great guy but....*sigh* When will it be MY turn??

 

[envybeauty]

what are you not doing that they are doing?

it is one thing to be single with a bunch of friends in the same boat but when you are single and all your girlfriends are hitching up, you gotta ask yourself some questions.

better yet, ask their boyfriends to make some introductions to their friends. Umm hmm.

 

[inthepink]

I can understand what you're feeling. I do hope you feel better about it soon.

 

[Helpmeblongagain]

I know what you mean:-/...

Just start going out more and being more open minded(thats what I plan to do)


Its very important to not get into the "Im so lonely" slump...you'll end up dating a jerk just for companionship...

 

[TCatt86]

What are you doing to no longer be single?

Are you going out more?
Are you approachable?

And I feel you, because spring time, is a lovely time to have someone and I don't have anyone either.

 

[luvn_life]

I know what you mean:-/...

Just start going out more and being more open minded(thats what I plan to do)


Its very important to not get into the "Im so lonely" slump...you'll end up dating a jerk just for companionship...

So true... But maybe not even a jerk but, just a time waster...

 

[Theo]

Lol even though I feel the exact opposite from you RIGHT NOW, I know exactly how you feel because I have felt that way before. What I like about being single is that I have the freedom to date whoever I want at the pace I want, if that's what I want at the time.

However, there have been times when I was single and I had nooo prospects. Not one. It sucked.

Hmm.... so do you have any prospects? How are the Rules going for you? I

 

[gabulldawg]

I can DEFINITELY feel you, OP. I'm just over being single!!! I've had enough of it. I miss companionship. Having someone to kick it with - just to watch TV or SOMETHING. I'm dating someone, but it's just starting out and things are kind of going a bit slow (partially my fault). I am so ready for a long-term relationship...

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

Thanks for the responses ladies. Some more responses would be nice too. I hope I'm not the only one feeling this way.

what are you not doing that they are doing?

it is one thing to be single with a bunch of friends in the same boat but when you are single and all your girlfriends are hitching up, you gotta ask yourself some questions.

better yet, ask their boyfriends to make some introductions to their friends. Umm hmm.

I'm not really "doing" anything different from them! If anything I'm probably getting out and doing more things than they are.

And to be honest, (maybe I should clarify), not ALL of my girlfriends are dating someone. Actually most of my close girlfriends are still single and aren't even dating anybody. But, my sister is already married, and one of my closests girlfriends (the one who sent me the e-mail today) has started dating a guy about a few months ago. We used to be so close and we knew how it felt to be "single". She would encourage me when I was feeling down and I would encourage her when she was down. It's like we could always count on each other to hang out and do things if nobody else was free.

Now days it's like...she doesn't have much time for me anymore.

I know what you mean:-/...

Just start going out more and being more open minded(thats what I plan to do)


Its very important to not get into the "Im so lonely" slump...you'll end up dating a jerk just for companionship...

Yea I agree. You're right. I don't want to fall into a slump, but it's hard...especially with the weather looking nice. I just got out of a relationship with a guy that I wasn't that into back in Feb., and even HE's starting to make me second-guess. Like I'm thinking: "hmmm...maybe I should just give him another chance. Maybe he's not that bad!" But I know it's just lonliness talking.

The guy I REALLY wanted is now dating someone too, so that's also been weighing on my mind. *sigh* OH well...

What are you doing to no longer be single?

Are you going out more?
Are you approachable?

And I feel you, because spring time, is a lovely time to have someone and I don't have anyone either.

Yes. Yes. And Yes. I do go out...quite often actually. In fact, friends have nicknamed me the "socialite" and the "party queen". I do tend to meet different people at different parties/gatherings. And I try to go out and do some active things with friends when they invite me, so I'm not sitting at home like a hermit.

I feel that I'm very approachable. But, I don't chase guys. I have learned my lesson.

I am (however) picky when it comes to certain guys. He has to be a good person, and he has to be God-fearing. That hasn't usually been a problem. The MAIN problem that I'm running into is that most of the guys I meet I'm either not attracted to, or they are not into me (at least I don't think).

Lol even though I feel the exact opposite from you RIGHT NOW, I know exactly how you feel because I have felt that way before. What I like about being single is that I have the freedom to date whoever I want at the pace I want, if that's what I want at the time.

However, there have been times when I was single and I had nooo prospects. Not one. It sucked.

Hmm.... so do you have any prospects? How are the Rules going for you? I

NOPE! No prospects! Not anymore. Not a single one. I think that's what's getting me so down. I used to have at least a guy that I was "talking to". Sometimes more than one at a time! Now days I don't have much of anything. The only guys that end up liking me are guy "friends". Ones that I just view as my brother.

I don't know what I'm doing wrong!

BTW...Yeah I'm still doing "the Rules"...and it's getting a lot easier not to pursue. But even the guys I WANT to pursue (and get to know better) I always just assume that they are either taken, or married already. OR...I figure that some other girl has her eye on him already so I don't even bother trying... *sigh*

 

[hopeful]

Don't know if this will make you feel better or not, but even though I'm married and have two daughters lately I have been in foul mood, dh has been getting on my last nerve, the kids schedules have been driving me up a wall, I have seriously been having a hard time. Thank goodness the kids' last day of school is Friday and dh's travel schedule is getting better because I don't know I might end up on the news. Sometimes life in general can be stressful and get us way down. I am literally pulling myself out of this rut because I hate being stressed and unhappy.

 

[honeycomb719]

Ive been where you are right now OP..Just know that things do change. Nothing stays the same for long...

 

[Theo]

NOPE! No prospects! Not anymore. Not a single one. I think that's what's getting me so down. I used to have at least a guy that I was "talking to". Sometimes more than one at a time! Now days I don't have much of anything. The only guys that end up liking me are guy "friends". Ones that I just view as my brother.

I don't know what I'm doing wrong!

BTW...Yeah I'm still doing "the Rules"...and it's getting a lot easier not to pursue. But even the guys I WANT to pursue (and get to know better) I always just assume that they are either taken, or married already. OR...I figure that some other girl has her eye on him already so I don't even bother trying... *sigh*

What's wrong with your guy friends? YOu can't see yourself dating them?

And, stop assuming things like that! Even if some girl has her eye on him, if she hasn't scooped him up he's still available.

 

[prettyFine]

enhance ur social network. things will get better.

 

[Bunny77]

What's wrong with your guy friends? YOu can't see yourself dating them?

And, stop assuming things like that! Even if some girl has her eye on him, if she hasn't scooped him up he's still available.

Hmmm... that's a good point (both, but especially the bolded).

There is a school of thought that says that women should stop worrying about the men that aren't interested in them, and start paying more attention to the ones that are and pick from there.

Just a thought...

 

[LivingDol1]

i totally understand the way you feel. i'm single as well and while i was ok with that over the winter, now i just wanna get out there and meet guys. i have zero prospects! not a one. some of my friends are married, or dating long term... only a few of us are single. and i don't have many guy friends either. the ones i would consider datable are dating someone or are somehow unavailable in some other way or probably don't ever look at me that way. and then a lot of my guy friends are just not the type i would consider dating.

it's okay to be picky and have your "list" of what makes a guy perfect for you. it's a good idea to go out like you have been and perhaps pick up a few new interests. i'm trying to get out there as well. don't let your friends' relationships make you wish you could be in a relationship now. just keep doing what you're doing!

 

[runwaydream]

what exactly are you LOOKING for though??

are you looking to date someone w. marriage in mind. or do you just want someone to pass time with.

cause i mean the latter should be easy, the former.. well that can be tricky

 

[Coco_Sips781]

I know I start feeling like that when I look at other people's facebook and MySpace pages. Just try not to compare life to others because that is only one part of their lives that you are seeing...you don't know what is really going on.

 

[SeatownSista]

No, you're not the only one. I'm sick of being single too, and I have no prospects. I thought I had finally met someone special about a month ago, we had a few GREAT dates and then I stopped hearing from him. As frustrated as I am with being single, I don't feel like doing anything to meet someone right now. I haven't had any luck in a long time and I'm tired.

 

[HairQueen]

No, you're not the only one. I'm sick of being single too, and I have no prospects. I thought I had finally met someone special about a month ago, we had a few GREAT dates and then I stopped hearing from him. As frustrated as I am with being single, I don't feel like doing anything to meet someone right now. I haven't had any luck in a long time and I'm tired.

Same thing happened to me 2 weeks ago! Still trying to figure out why....did you contact him in the end or just leave it? I tried to contact mine then gave up when I got wishy washy responses.

Been officialy single for a year now and hating it. Hate having to go on all these dates. The one I like hasn't called me back, the one I don't like (in a romantic way) called yesterday to tell me he really really likes me and wants to see me again *sigh*

I think about it every day and the clock is ticking...I am 33.

 

[Bunny77]

Same thing happened to me 2 weeks ago! Still trying to figure out why....did you contact him in the end or just leave it? I tried to contact mine then gave up when I got wishy washy responses.

Been officialy single for a year now and hating it. Hate having to go on all these dates. The one I like hasn't called me back, the one I don't like (in a romantic way) called yesterday to tell me he really really likes me and wants to see me again *sigh*

I think about it every day and the clock is ticking...I am 33.

Why don't you like the one who likes you? What's wrong with him?

 

[nychaelasymone]

be happy where you are......when its your time, its your time. Don't force it.......cause if you konw like me, the otherside has its moments too

be cafeful what you ask for

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

Hey...I'm sorry guys... I hope I wasn't a downer on this board. I was just feeling the need to vent. *sigh* I'm feeling better today. I guess it just depends on what has been going on lately that gets me in one of those "sick-of-being-single" type moods.

Usually I'm pretty content with my life and my "singleness". I'm having fun! I'll be traveling out of the country next month, and will be able to get a much-needed break. So, honestly I'm not sitting at home twiddling my thumbs waiting for some man to make me "complete". NO WAY.

It just gets lonely sometimes, because God did give us that desire to want companionship...especially companionship with the opposite sex. So...there's no shame in it. I'm not ashamed.

Don't know if this will make you feel better or not, but even though I'm married and have two daughters lately I have been in foul mood, dh has been getting on my last nerve, the kids schedules have been driving me up a wall, I have seriously been having a hard time.

Yeah actually that does help me to feel a little better. It helps to put things into perspective and realize that just because you're married or dating someone that doesn't mean that things are always 100% peachy-keen 24/7.

Hmmm... that's a good point (both, but especially the bolded).

There is a school of thought that says that women should stop worrying about the men that aren't interested in them, and start paying more attention to the ones that are and pick from there.

Just a thought...

That is true Bunny. Honestly though the guy friends that I have (aside from the one I was "in love" with) just aren't really my type. OR...I've told him so many of my "secrets" or guy troubles/relationship stuff that he becomes more and more like a brother to me. I would never tell a guy friend that I was actually interested in some of the stuff I've told some of my regular guy friends.

The same scenario seems to play out though. I meet a guy, he seems like he just wants to be friends--> so I treat him like a "friend"---> tell him all my "business"---> later on down the road he ends up falling for me. Meanwhile I'm thinking: "Hey...we are JUST friends!"

Plus, most of my guy friends are "just FRIENDS" for a reason. One is too needy, the other is overly judgemental, one talks waaay too much for my taste and is a bit on the controlling side...etc. Just a few things I've picked up. If I saw them as more than a friend , then I would treat them differently from the outset. But to be honest, with the exception of that one guy friend that I really liked, I don't typically fall for my guy friends. I don't even go out of my way to make "guy friends" so that I can have future romantic relationships with them.

*Sigh* Oh well, I know the guy that is right for me is out there somewhere and will find me someday.

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

BTW, I'm not looking to recreational date at the moment. I've done that, and while it may be fun, I'm looking to start settling down now. I'm still enjoying the "single life" (believe me! lol), but now days I'm looking for more than just "cute guys". He has to have his act together, be a helpful and considerate person, treat me w/respect, and be INTO me.

Having fun is nice. To be honest, "fun" is what it should be when you first start dating a guy. But if I'm dating a guy, I want it to be because eventually I'm thinking along the lines of marriage. I think some guys can sense that if they were to get with me they would have to "come correct" and have at least SOME things in order, so I think that's probably why a lot of them either only watch from afar, or send mixed signals.

 

[Chromia]

No, you're not the only one. I'm sick of being single too, and I have no prospects. I thought I had finally met someone special about a month ago, we had a few GREAT dates and then I stopped hearing from him. As frustrated as I am with being single, I don't feel like doing anything to meet someone right now. I haven't had any luck in a long time and I'm tired.

What is up with these guys who seem like they're having fun on a date and they're enjoying your company, then they seem to fall of the face of the earth?

To answer the OP's question, I'm also sick and tired of being single. I would really like to have companionship, a partnership, and affection from someone.

 

[DaPPeR]

I feel ur post OP on sooooo many levels. I have been feeling this way for the past 2 years God willing, things will change for us.

ETA:Its even harder to have a positive outlook on the situation, when you have no prospects, which is my case.

 

[NYLegalNewbie]

Don't underestimate the power of positive thinking.

About a month ago, I was feeling the same way as you. Then, one day, when it was gorgeous outside, I said to myself "I'm going to go hang out downtown, have brunch and I'm going to meet someone." I didn't know who or how. I just said it was going to happen. After brunch, sure enough, I came across a group of 3 guys. They were cool, and I grabbed a drink (well, not a real drink...cider...lol) with them. Out of nowhere, one of them was like "I have to introduce you to my friend. He's thinking of moving back to the city...I think you'd two make a great match." I thought he was full of sh*t, but what was there to lose? I gave him my info. Sure enough, about 2 to 3 weeks later, he introduced me to his friend and we went out on two dates while he was here. He's hoping to see me once he gets back stateside in a few weeks.

I can't say it's going to go anywhere. Can't even say whether or not there's going to be a third date. But I do know that I made up my mind I was going to meet someone, and I did (albeit indirectly!)

 

[DreamLife]

deleted this post

 

[CarefreeinChicago]

Op I feel you. I am about to be 36. I just give up. I don't even look men in the face I just don't want to be bothered with the games.

 

[cutenss]

I am right there with ya. I will 41 next month. I have never been married, and just got out of a good/bad relationship on Jaunuary 1. I am ready to attached

 

[BlackHairDiva]

Same here, but I barely have time to myself so. I just need to get back on my feet first.