BGT
Well-Known Member
No, I messaged him so he'd know what happened. He tweeted that I was "evil" because I was talking to him while having a boyfriend when that wasn't true.
so I had to clear the air.
I Wouldn't Have Believe This Story Had It Not Happened To Me!
- Thread starter BGT
- Start date
No, I messaged him so he'd know what happened. He tweeted that I was "evil" because I was talking to him while having a boyfriend when that wasn't true.
so I had to clear the air.beingofserenity
Well-Known Member
Yes. I think you chased him too much. And that he wasn't really into you, but gave you a chance. And then used the Michal B Jordan pic as an excuse for his out. And I think you boosted his ego a little with your snapchat message, because it makes it seem like you kind of went out of your way to send a sort of petty message.
I am pretty anti-dating white men, but if you do NEVER EVER chase them. And try not to be petty about getting blocked. You didn't have a relationship with him and I think you guys hadn't even met in person yet?
I am pretty anti-dating white men, but if you do NEVER EVER chase them. And try not to be petty about getting blocked. You didn't have a relationship with him and I think you guys hadn't even met in person yet?
I totally missed the part where he was white. I had to read it again lol.
I shouldn't laugh, but LOL I keep picturing the scenario. He's planning a date with a girl that reached out to him, and then he checks her twitter and sees this guy. And it does look like someone posing fine and sexy for his girlfriend.
So Bart gets butt-hurt and blocks OP on every form of social media lol. They say that men are more emotional than women when you hit that ego. I can believe it.Well, I guess better to see now than later that you might not be compatible. (My guess is that he would misunderstand you a lot, and his reaction was a bit extreme. What happens if he misunderstands the next thing that you do?) Still funny to me, on to the next I guess.
sj10460
Don't Come for me unless I send for you!
I don't think his response was abnormal. A lot of people would have blocked in that scenario and it shows imo that's he's serious about dating and being monogamous. POF is known for f*boys so the fact that he blocked her after he thought she had a boyfriend and didn't meet up to try to smash shows he's a good guy [despite his] whiteness
Yeah but he didn't need to make a passive aggressive, public service announcement on Twitter after blocking her. I thought he blocked her, why the PSA? Who is he talking to? (I almost wonder if he wants people to know girls are sweating him, even when they have a boyfriend LOL). And petty smilies when she explained that the picture is a celebrity? Please. I feel like he blocked her to make a point.
I think it's best she found out now rather than later that they aren't compatible. I also don't think it's worth it to reach out to him again.
hopeful
Well-Known Member
I think that's a bit of a reach.
Crackers Phinn
Either A Blessing Or A Lesson.
I shouldn't laugh, but LOL I keep picturing the scenario. He's planning a date with a girl that reached out to him, and then he checks her twitter and sees this guy. And it does look like someone posing fine and sexy for his girlfriend.
See I thought it looked like dude was taking a selfie before heading off to his customer service job.
sweetvi
Well-Known Member
Girl I was like too much chasing. The f...?? I had guys who were interested shoot me their number before deactivating their page. If not oh welll lol
sj10460
Don't Come for me unless I send for you!
I don't think so. What do you make of it?
She was clearly interested and he could have used that to his advantage. OP said everything was going well until she posted the mcm photo.
BGT
Well-Known Member
Yes. Did y'all miss the part where I said we were going on a date next week?
While we were chatting I told him I had four brothers and he said "oh I hope I don't get beat up if I ever hurt you!" So I was chasing him?
sj10460
Don't Come for me unless I send for you!
I would say you definitely was the pursuer. Once he blocked you, that should have been the end. IMO the chase came when you still found a way to contact him after it was obvious he was no longer interested.
- initiated contact with him on okc
- then had a friend get the guy to follow her on twitter
- then sends another message lol.
- He blocks you on every avenue yet you still managed to contact him.
Fine 4s
Well-Known Member
OK, lots of funnies in these comments.
@BGT "...I was being publicly slandered. I had to stand up for myself." LMAO!!!!
@Crackers Phinn customer service job? really? LOL
The main point to me is how he handled miscommunication.
Then again, I'm sure we handle miscommunication fixes with others according to the relationship we have with said person/s.
@BGT "...I was being publicly slandered. I had to stand up for myself." LMAO!!!!
@Crackers Phinn customer service job? really? LOL
The main point to me is how he handled miscommunication.
Then again, I'm sure we handle miscommunication fixes with others according to the relationship we have with said person/s.
hopeful
Well-Known Member
I'm just saying that is not enough to give him the benefit of the doubt and give him the "good guy" title. Too much we don't know about this guy. He could be a player. He could have been looking for a way out and took his first chance. I honestly think he was offended that she posted a pic of a handsome black guy. Like most black women might give a pass to a black guy who posted a pic of a pretty black woman but would be offended if he posted a pic of a blonde white woman with blue eyes. I think he thought/hoped she preferred white guys. But my point is we don't have enough info to assume he is a good guy. He might be, but he might not be.
I also do agree that she did chase him, did too much, and that set things in motion for things to end up this way. If he was really concerned about the pic he could have reached out to her or even the mutual friend, but he dipped out pretty quickly IMO. He dipped because he wasn't that invested. Nowadays it's easy to carry on multiple faux deep conversations and each woman be none the wiser. And I'm not saying OP was thirsty. Just did a little too much. Reaching out on the dating app first when she usually doesn't. Having a friend reach out to him. Believing he missed her message. It all seems innocent but adds up to him feeling a little too special and pursued.
MzLady78
Well-Known Member
I'm not giving a dude a cookie for leaving someone alone that he thought was taken, that's what you're supposed to do.
That doesn't make him a good guy.
BGT
Well-Known Member
Thanks. My thing is, I'm gonna be me, I'm gonna do me...and I'm not going to change just so I can be palatable to people. I don't need lots of men to fall at my feet: I just need one. And he's not the one, so I'm gonna move on. I have options...I have a law student pursuing me now, so I'm gonna see where that goes.
Crackers Phinn
Either A Blessing Or A Lesson.
*~*Afrolicious*~*
Well-Known Member
luckiestdestiny
Well-Known Member
Not really. He didn't direct his remarks with your name. He let you know why. No one else. I did read your response and think it was childish. Like you had to get in the last word and ha! You blocked him now take that!I can see that. But I was being publicly slandered. I had to stand up for myself. If that's doing too much, then I guess i'll have to live with that.
Regardless you both do not belong together so oh well. BUT you were definitely chasing him around for sure.
summertimewine
*sips tea*
I think he's mad because you posted a black man as your man crush, and he is not that 
Especially if he's military
Especially if he's military
luckiestdestiny
Well-Known Member
This is true.
I will also say this. When you think someone isn't right for you, you are supposed to end it. We were in the blocked guy thread cheering when the Op of that thread blocked a guy on her phone(you know the one where he was throwing rocks at her window). And she did that without explanation at first after he seemed ambivalent about the possible relationship. What's the difference? Regardless the reason: He was hoping for an out, He thought she had a man, etc....regardless, he bowed out because he didn't think she was right for him. Some people are more direct, some aren't. All we know is
1) He did not contact her online so...
2) She got a friend to contact him and tell him he didn't contact her so...
3) He then contacted her with some b.s excuse about why he didn't contact her and scheduled a date then...
4) She tweeted a pic of a guy who is not recognizable to everyone talking about he was her boyfriend then...
5) For whatever reason (he was like yay my chance to get out, or booo hoo she has a boyfriend how dare she...or whatever)...he blocked her on all forms of social media and in life. So...
6) She hunted him down yet again by trying every form of social media until ha! She found snapchat was not blocked you son of a B then...
7) He gives her some b.s excuse again (which shows his major lack of interest. HE made an excuse for why he wasn't interested because if he found out the truth and was interested he would've apologized and tried to smooth things over etc, etc)...so
8) ...then she's like take that I blocked you! I win.
Nope. When you type it all out and look at the reality there is one person doing too much. People will give excuses at times to not hurt your feelings and just bow out, or they are cowards, or whatever but most important than trying to understand them is to look at the reality. The reality is he was and is not interested. I don't believe he was butthurt. He gave more excuses to cover his tracks, not because he was still upset about some guy. He just wanted out. And yay you're not interested now, but I still think he knows that you were the one chasing, hurt, and trying to get the last word in. And it all looks quite childish.
This does not mean he's a great person. This means he is not the right person for you, as I'm sure you now know. It would be better, when he did not contact you to leave it alone. And even if you wanted to go out on a limb and he gave some b.s and scheduled a date, when he blocked you...who cares why? There's no need to go searching unless he typed your name all over the internet versus some possible stupid shade that only alludes to you. Oh well who knows or who cares. He's just too much of a coward to face you and so he's not for you anyways. I am actually on your side OP but don't let a guy get under your skin like that again and this is before you even have a date in the first place. This is too much investment and in the end even though you were done with it, you still went through too much to have the last word. Which means you do care. You are annoyed. He did get to you.
I really think we women shouldn't become so invested in people and let them pull at our emotions especially in the very beginning. Just have fun but do not let him take you for a crazy ride where you do childish or crazy things afterwards. This is your world. This is a trial thing, a try out. He struck out, on to the next as he's not the one. Just think of him as one of the guys trying out for your team and now after seeing his performance you shrug and give him his walking papers, or if he walks out while trying out you shrug again because your team is the ish. There are many who are trying out and you are the one in control of your life/destiny/team and who gets to be a part of it. You are not invested because they are not worthy of joining yet. So oh well, he blocked you (walked out during the trials) for whatever reason...thank goodness, that's one less person to filter through because you know he isn't right for the team. Your team (or you rather as I'm sure you are following my silly analogy) is the ISH and if he's too silly to see that, then he isn't worthy of your team and it's better to know in the beginning than to invest in something that will not work out. And say he walks. There's no reason to catch up with him and say "No you're not leaving, I FIRED YOU So there!"
You are the ISH. No need to do all of this. Just keep developing yourself as a person and know this: You don't want anyone who doesn't want you. You have too much pride. You are too wonderful to deal with someone who can't see that. Not everyone is right for everyone. This person just isn't for you. No need to go chasing in the first place. Position yourself sure, but never chase.
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Pat Mahurr
Pun intended
Lololol!
One day he'll see a MBJ movie and hate it without knowing why.
One day he'll see a MBJ movie and hate it without knowing why.
GraceJones
Well-Known Member
lmao
*~*Afrolicious*~*
Well-Known Member
I do agree the OKCupid reason was b.s. Everyone that's done online dating knows to shut down your account you have to deactivate the account not delete the app. He should have just been honest from the get go
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kikigirl
Well-Known Member
Too much man-pettiness going on with that dude. I agree that he was already ambivalent about OP. A guy into you would have read the Twitter/FB comments under the photo and realized MBJ was a celeb.
That scorched earth reaction of blocking OP on all SM was so extra... Some white dudes out there think they're already lowering their "standards" by dating black women, so bail at the slightest mistake/faux pas...whatever...moody/passive aggressive men are annoying! Buh Bye
That scorched earth reaction of blocking OP on all SM was so extra... Some white dudes out there think they're already lowering their "standards" by dating black women, so bail at the slightest mistake/faux pas...whatever...moody/passive aggressive men are annoying! Buh Bye
Pat Mahurr
Pun intended
IDK. I'm thinking he might have
a. Been burned by a cheating gf before or
b. Been thumped on by his gf's jealous bf before.
There's really no way of knowing why he reacted to a simple miscommunication the way he did, but I wouldn't want OP to think it's because she fell short in any way. These are his issues to deal with. OP needs to laugh it off like she's doing, and keep it moving.
a. Been burned by a cheating gf before or
b. Been thumped on by his gf's jealous bf before.
There's really no way of knowing why he reacted to a simple miscommunication the way he did, but I wouldn't want OP to think it's because she fell short in any way. These are his issues to deal with. OP needs to laugh it off like she's doing, and keep it moving.
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