How to date a white man

[nappystorm]

 

[FluffyRed]

Fleace Weaver, an L.A. socialite

Can you be a socialite with a name that totally disregards phonics?

I forget what weird contrived pronunciation they gave her name on NPR, but it was nothing like "fleece," which is what it looks like.

/rant

 

[RadiantBeauty]

There are already comments on the npr.org site. This one really got on my nerves. I suspect is a black guy who didn't like what he read.

Keith Turner (Bricks) wrote:

I think people should date whom ever they like to date or love. I don't think that you should allow the ignorance of others to limit your life. A more important observation that I had about this featured report was that the creator of the seminar (Ms. Weaver) is still a 'Ms.' This could be for a lot of reasons but the bottom line is she has chosen to date any (and potentially) all men available regardless of race, ethinicity, creed, etc., but yet she is still 'Single.' Maybe a crusade of self evaluation and improvement would be more valuable than a campaign to diversify the types of men that 'Black' women are dating. Often, we need to be the change that we want to see. Improve your personal flaws, and maybe the dating seen changes for the better for all. There are a lot of topics that I think deserve more energy and commitment than a seminar on how and why Black woman should consider dating non-Black men. Just my thoughts.

He is just like the rest of the black men that get mad when black women date outside their race, but its not an issue when they do it though.

 

[Bunny77]

He is just like the rest of the black men that get mad when black women date outside their race, but its not an issue when they do it though.

There are a few more "hating" comments on there... nearly all from black men.

Interesting, but I'm not surprised.

 

[keykee]

yeah all I can say is.. Wow!

 

[jupitermoon]

I have always been of the mindset that men should do the pursuing...that, if anything, it's men who should attend a seminar on how to pursue a woman. Not the other way around.
You got women lined up trying to see how they can snag a white man, like it is the white man that is the prize and not the woman.
I don't like this role reversal. A man will not prize something/someone he didn't have to work for and be proud to have won.

That's what's off for me about this.

I agree. I see all of these blogs and now workshops encouraging black women to date white men, but where are the blogs and workshops encouraging white men to date us? I don't see white men chasing after black women in real life.

 

[strenght81]

He is just like the rest of the black men that get mad when black women date outside their race, but its not an issue when they do it though.

I was very surprised at the reaction of many black men when I was tutoring a white guy, that they assumed was my boyfriend. So many black men approached me that day to tell me how beautiful they thought I was. It was weird in a way, at times disrespectful to my student. I think it made them feel insecure for the most part....a black girl dating out her race. "Why would she do that, what's wrong with me", is how I imagined them to feel. I think that is how most of "us" feel when our black men date out their race.

 

[AnnDriena_]

We'd be pissing our panties if there was a "how to date a white woman" workshop.

This isn't about HOW to date a white man. It's not about HOW period. It's about the discussion of interracial relationships. Everyone commenting has gotten this twisted.

This is so sad... you date a white man the same way you date a black man.... this is so pathetic

Actually I don't think you date a white man the same way you date a black man. We live in a society that is not color blind and a black woman will have issues dating out of her race and a panel discussion on those issues seems to be what this is. Nothing more and nothing less.

I think people are twisting this discussion panel into something they disagree with to have an easier time tearing it down. It's simply a discussion/meeting of like minded/curious women. It's not TEACHING SOMEONE HOW TO DATE.

And I know this may be embarrassing for some of us on the board but I think black folks in general need to stop acting like someone is airing our dirty laundry when it's already hung out on the line.

If we want to be seen as better we have to do better. Divorce doesn't even seem to be mentioned when this topic is brought up. It's that so many of us have NEVER been married and it's not all about religion. But we have all these babies being born out of wedlock (with black men) so our men definately still want us. They just want to treat us like incubators. And we let them. Black women need to better if we want less of our dirty laundry hung out to dry.

And if finding love elsewhere is what happens for you when you demand more of black men then so be it. We have to keep demanding more until we get it and our daughters see us getting it.

 

[mswoman]

This is the elephant in the room that many of us do not want to talk about. Many black women do not have children and are never married. It is sad but many women say they would rather be alone than to marry outside of their race. All I have to say is well... statistics don't lie. Although many women are holding out for the "one" God sees our need and wouldn't want for us to be single if we truely desire a mate. But it's through the decisions of a person that will determine if they will be single or married. Selfishness and set limitations on whom God may have chosen is the key to being single.

Here's the article from npr.org

For many black women in America, finding love has become a serious issue.
Census data show that roughly 40 percent of black adult women in the U.S. have never been married. That's nearly twice the percentage of white women.
One entrepreneur in Los Angeles is fighting the odds. Her mission: move black women from no man's land to a diverse dating world.
Black Girl's Guide To Interracial Dating
More than 100 black women pack a small Italian restaurant near West Los Angeles. It's standing-room only. They're not there for the food; they're there for a seminar called "Free Your Mind: The Black Girl's Guide to Interracial Dating."

Fleace Weaver, an L.A. socialite and the organizer of the night's event, got the idea after noticing that many of her black friends had it all — a career, house, independence — but no man.
Weaver is black. She dates men of all colors — black, white, brown — and wants more black women to do the same. "I am an international lover. All right; I am an equal opportunity lover," Weaver says. "That means I love who is good to me. I don't want anybody just because they're a certain color."


Some black professional women say it's harder to find a black man at their same education and income level. You can see the trend on college campuses. According to the Department of Education, in the fall of 2007, 64 percent of black students enrolled in college were women.
But Weaver argues that Mr. Right doesn't have to be Mr. Black. "There's no reason for us to believe we have to be alone. The only thing that's keeping us from finding someone is that we limit ourselves," Weaver says.


Crossing Racial Lines For Love
Interracial dating is a sensitive issue in the black community. Blacks have a brutal history with race relations; some blacks see dating outside the race as betraying the culture.
Still, more black men are thinking outside the%

 

[BroadstreetBully]

I agree. I see all of these blogs and now workshops encouraging black women to date white men, but where are the blogs and workshops encouraging white men to date us? I don't see white men chasing after black women in real life.

No man is going to read a blog, book, or attend a workshop on how to get a woman, period. A man's only job is to approach a woman he likes. The point of this workshop was to encourage black women to be more open minded, NOT teach them how to snag a white man. We are the least open minded in terms of interracial dating when we need to be the most open minded--hence why there are so many blogs on the subject. According to the NPR segment, some black women who attended the seminar expressed that they will still stick with black men, but they were curious about the subject. So not every woman attending the seminar was looking to get her a white man.

As for the bolded, that isn't completely true. Your average white man and black woman have little in common--which is why we rarely date/marry one another. However, a black woman who fits into a non-black man's 'ideal' (and no I'm not talking about lightskinned or anything) will be chased by many men of all races. Place a Gabrielle Union or Aisha Tyler in a diverse setting and she will be chased...hard, trust.

 

[NYAmicas]

Important question here=Will there be food and drink provided after the seminar?

 

[inspiration150]

It wasn't called "How to Date a White Man."

That's what the person who started the thread called it.

The name of the seminar was "Free Your Mind, the Black Girl's Guide to Interracial Dating."

If you read the flyer, you will never see the words "white men" mentioned. You'll see it talking about "non-blacks" or "men of other races," but there was nothing in it that said, "Here is how you get a white man."

Sorry, my mistake. I got confused by the title. Thank you for clearing that up. I understand now what you mean. See, now I understand better. Kinda my fault for kinda glancing at the poster. Well, I see how it might be embarrassing. But it is better to have it talked about.

 

[FluffyRed]

Important question here=Will there be food and drink provided after the seminar?

YOU SILLY!!!