MissScarlett
New Member
bmore, astroglide is susposed to be one of those really good ones too, not sure if it causes vajayjay problems but its very uhhh *lubricating*
How often do you say "no" to him?
- Thread starter Ayeshia
- Start date
Radianthealth
Well-Known Member
camellia said:There's something about the bolded that really bothers me.I think saying yes every single time just to make my husband happy is a bad idea.
I think dropping everything to please him is a bad idea too.
Sometimes I just don't feel like it. Why should his wants trump mine every time? I really don't understand that kind of thinking. I don't know about everyone else's man, but mine is ready to "go" constantly.
I'm hardly shutting him down constantly, but I won't go along with it when I don't want to , and I sure won't fake it just to get it over with and make him happy. If he's in such "need" he does have alternatives.
I like to enjoy sex, I don't want it to become a chore.
Okay, down off of my soapbox now. Just something to think about.
I TOTALLY understand what you mean Camellia
This has been my stance but sometimes I feel like I am being such a hardas$ and is it really worth it in the long run.
It isn't a huge sacrifice and he does so much to make me happy so it's not like he is asking me to climb Mt. Everest.
I am stubborn and way too independent for my own good. I think I have been more of a taker out of this marraige so far and this is probably a way that I can give more that he will really appreciate
It isn't going to be an overnight thing and I doubt I will ever get to the point where I will be boon-kin ova every time he asks
, but I can get better and that is what I am going to try to do
MissScarlett
New Member
nikki1971 said:Dang I have this problem too
Hmm the lube should not replace foreplay
I think it just *aides* things along....if we grab the lube too soon and i"m not 'ready' then yeah I will feel sore
Radianthealth
Well-Known Member
WARNING: Olive Oil is natural but it will erode a condom. All you single ladies, this is probably NOT A GOOD IDEA for condoms!!!!
Not trying to be raunchy by having your mate satisfy you orally can help with moisture in that area without putting the condom at risk
Carry on...
Not trying to be raunchy by having your mate satisfy you orally can help with moisture in that area without putting the condom at risk
Carry on...
trimbride said:WARNING: Olive Oil is natural but it will erode a condom. All you single ladies, this is probably NOT A GOOD IDEA for condoms!!!!
Not trying to be raunchy by having your mate satisfy you orally can help with moisture in that area without putting the condom at risk
Carry on...
I was gonna mentioned that was best way but didn't want to join a bann.
Didn't know that about olive oil.
This is very true. I may try to find a natural or organic lubricant online that safe for condoms. For now I just don't use any type of lubricant.trimbride said:WARNING: Olive Oil is natural but it will erode a condom. All you single ladies, this is probably NOT A GOOD IDEA for condoms!!!!
Not trying to be raunchy by having your mate satisfy you orally can help with moisture in that area without putting the condom at risk
Carry on...
Radianthealth
Well-Known Member
• Keep things well lubed, but use only water- or silicone-based lubricants with latex condoms. Oil-based lubricants — such as petroleum jelly, baby oil, mineral oil, body lotion, cold cream, or vegetable oil — can weaken latex rubber almost instantly and cause it to rupture. Even foods like whipped cream contain oil and can damage a condom.
http://www.babycenter.com/refcap/baby/postpartumsex/3562.html
http://www.babycenter.com/refcap/baby/postpartumsex/3562.html
MissScarlett
New Member
dlewis said:I was gonna mentioned that was best way but didn't want to join a bann.
Didn't know that about olive oil.
ditto...I didn't want to uh say that and get the thread locked down
Radianthealth
Well-Known Member
I am not trying to get things locked down either, this is useful & important information. It has to do with women's health
preciousjewel76
New Member
dlewis said:Ok, that's a good way to look at it.
Looking at dlewis' siggy has me wondering about incorporating edible items into the act of love. Hmmmmm, homemade jam......
Southernbella.
Well-Known Member
camellia said:There's something about the bolded that really bothers me.
I think dropping everything to please him is a bad idea too.
Sometimes I just don't feel like it. Why should his wants trump mine every time? I really don't understand that kind of thinking. I don't know about everyone else's man, but mine is ready to "go" constantly.
I'm hardly shutting him down constantly, but I won't go along with it when I don't want to , and I sure won't fake it just to get it over with and make him happy. If he's in such "need" he does have alternatives.
I like to enjoy sex, I don't want it to become a chore.
Okay, down off of my soapbox now. Just something to think about.
Once again, you are in my head!
nikki1971 said:I can't use any of the K Y products they cause major vajayjay issues for meI wonder are there natural/organic lubricants that would not cause me problems down there
This isn't natural or organic but have you tried astroglide. Now that's the bomb! I don' tlike KY. I used to say "no" several times but now I never say "no". I just put myself in his shoes and thought about how much I'd hate to be turned away.
LaRobinWolfe76
New Member
Ladies there's an all natural lubricant that feels like silk and is safe for condoms and the name of it is FireFly.www.fireflylubricant.com
I have never, ever turned my SO down even when I had just been discharged from the ER,vomitting with the stomach flu, even when I'm tired, even when he's woke me up at 1,2,3 or even 4 in the morning and I had to be up at 5:30, even when I'm getting dressed for work. I'm always willing, ready and waiting and all my girlfriends want to know why I get a proposal from the man I'm dating within the first 3 months of our relationship. My SO said he's had a lot of women but he has never had a woman who is always ready and never says no and because he is so masculine it makes him feel like "the man". He says I'm the first woman other than his ex-wife that he's been faithful to and he said he was only faithful to her because of the vows but with me it's because he gets everything he needs from me and doesn't have to look anywhere else for satisfaction and he's never met a woman like that. I've always been a pleaser. I just love going out of my way to please my man. He says I have him so spoiled that he just has to marry me. Also, he's never said no to me either and it's never a quickie with us its always 1-3 hours at any given time but I do remember him telling me when we first met that he didn't have a high sex drive and wasn't going to be lasting no 3 hours and doing it everyday and he was also taking enhancers but since he's been with me its been 3 hours 90% of the time and when we're home all day together its 3-4 times that day and its everyday with no enhancers!
I have never, ever turned my SO down even when I had just been discharged from the ER,vomitting with the stomach flu, even when I'm tired, even when he's woke me up at 1,2,3 or even 4 in the morning and I had to be up at 5:30, even when I'm getting dressed for work. I'm always willing, ready and waiting and all my girlfriends want to know why I get a proposal from the man I'm dating within the first 3 months of our relationship. My SO said he's had a lot of women but he has never had a woman who is always ready and never says no and because he is so masculine it makes him feel like "the man". He says I'm the first woman other than his ex-wife that he's been faithful to and he said he was only faithful to her because of the vows but with me it's because he gets everything he needs from me and doesn't have to look anywhere else for satisfaction and he's never met a woman like that. I've always been a pleaser. I just love going out of my way to please my man. He says I have him so spoiled that he just has to marry me. Also, he's never said no to me either and it's never a quickie with us its always 1-3 hours at any given time but I do remember him telling me when we first met that he didn't have a high sex drive and wasn't going to be lasting no 3 hours and doing it everyday and he was also taking enhancers but since he's been with me its been 3 hours 90% of the time and when we're home all day together its 3-4 times that day and its everyday with no enhancers!
mermaid
Well-Known Member
I brush him off and keep movin', lol!!Ayeshia said:Okay Imma keep it clean...but I was wondering how often do you turn down your Dh's/SO's advances for sex?
When you do turn him down what do you say? do you give him an excuse as to why you dont want to do it at that particular time or do you just say "no" and keep it moving? (well obviously besides the period days for those who dont like to get down like that) How does he usually react?
Has he ever turned you down?
I don't need to give him excuses. He never turns me down, because if I am randy enough to have to wake his *** up, he KNOWS it's gonna be pornographic and he is always down for that!!!
shynessqueen
New Member
I'm going to be real with y'all. I say no to my man to make him want it more. He knows when he does get it, it will be off the hook. I can't give it to him on the regular basis because he will get use to it. I know that sex and food is the way to my man heart. I know when it's time to make love. I know when it's time for a quickie ( right now) and i know when it's time to get freaky. 
LaRobinWolfe76 said:
Wow! That's dedication! But, didn't he see that you were sick? I'd be kind of upset if I were that ill and my husband was still looking for some. Can't compare what it's like before marriage to after, but I do know that with pregnancy, sometimes, I just don't feel like it and he's always considerate enough to see that and grateful for the times that I'm ready to jump him. Before pregnancy, I'd only give him a raincheck due to sheer exhaustion or time of the month- he's never asked when i've been sick and I don't ask when he's sick/exhausted either. Like some of the other posters said, I really like to enjoy it and sometimes just can't if I'm feeling crummy and know that it would be much better later.
N.P.R. Addict
New Member
LaRobinWolfe76 said:
As for this. . . uh never mind! I just hope there is more to his devotion to you then you giving it up all the tie within the first three months of the relationship.
glamazon386
Well-Known Member
trimbride said:WARNING: Olive Oil is natural but it will erode a condom. All you single ladies, this is probably NOT A GOOD IDEA for condoms!!!!
Not trying to be raunchy by having your mate satisfy you orally can help with moisture in that area without putting the condom at risk
Carry on...
Thanks for that bit of info before I went off and got adventurous.
caligirl
Well-Known Member
[/QUOTE]
He says I'm the first woman other than his ex-wife that he's been faithful to and he said he was only faithful to her because of the vows but with me it's because he gets everything he needs from me and doesn't have to look anywhere else for satisfaction and he's never met a woman like that.[/QUOTE]
Umm, not a good sign. If he's tellin you that you're the only one he's been faithful to, that means he's been unfaithful to a lot of other women.
He says I'm the first woman other than his ex-wife that he's been faithful to and he said he was only faithful to her because of the vows but with me it's because he gets everything he needs from me and doesn't have to look anywhere else for satisfaction and he's never met a woman like that.[/QUOTE]
Umm, not a good sign. If he's tellin you that you're the only one he's been faithful to, that means he's been unfaithful to a lot of other women.
