How easy it is for a chocolate sister to get a chocolate guy

[Shardonay11]

Now, ladies there are some good black men. I know it does'nt seem like it sometimes, but there is.

 

[cocoberry10]

I find that so interesting. My brother is very light and he prefers to date girls that medium brown to dark skinned.

I think it depends on the guy. I know some darker guys that like darker girls, and I know some that don’t. And I know some lighter guys that like darker girls and some that don’t. I don’t think there’s a “rule” of thumb. But I have noticed that it seems a lot of times you see a chocolate man with a fair skinned woman. But this isn’t always true!

 

[cocoberry10]

Now, ladies there are some good black men. I know it does'nt seem like it sometimes, but there is.

Yes, this is probably what’s more difficult for some women to believe!

 

[facets]

i think it depends on where you are. in Miami i gonna have to say most of the video girls are Spanish. i asked my male cousin who's from Canada why he dates white women, he told me that's what he grew up around. I'm sure if i had lived where he was from my tastes would be different. People who hate sisters are being ignorant and they got issues that we shouldn't be concerned with. But i think the majority of men like beautiful women. Go to a mainly 'white' club and those boys in there will hit on you same as in the 'black' club.

I think that's the key factor.

 

[Sasha Fierce]

Now, ladies there are some good black men. I know it does'nt seem like it sometimes, but there is.

Thanks for putting this out there. I know I needed to hear it

 

[Aubergold]

My SO and I are both about as dark as they come. People call us African Ken and Barbie.

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

I think it depends on the guy. I know some darker guys that like darker girls, and I know some that don’t. And I know some lighter guys that like darker girls and some that don’t. I don’t think there’s a “rule” of thumb. But I have noticed that it seems a lot of times you see a chocolate man with a fair skinned woman. But this isn’t always true!

Yeah, that's what I've noticed too. Usually, the guy is always darker than the woman. They even did a study a while back with magazine ads, and they said that in the majority of the ads that featured a man with a woman, the man was USUALLY darker in complexion than the woman. And we're not just talking about black ads either. White ads too!

So, I think it just goes back to the age-old myth/belief that:

-Dark skin/complexion= more masculine, strong, healthy
-Light skin/complexion= more feminine, light, weaker, delicate, etc.



So....I'm not surprised the darker men gravitate to the lighter women. I'm also not surprised that lighter men don't mind darker women. In fact, I'd venture to say that it is probably EASIER for a darker-skinned girl to attract a light-skinned guy than it is for a dark-skinned girl to attract a dark skinned guy. I think the darker guys are usually only seeing the light-skinned girls.

That has been my experience/observation anyway...

 

[cocoberry10]

Yeah, that's what I've noticed too. Usually, the guy is always darker than the woman. They even did a study a while back with magazine ads, and they said that in the majority of the ads that featured a man with a woman, the man was USUALLY darker in complexion than the woman. And we're not just talking about black ads either. White ads too!

So, I think it just goes back to the age-old myth/belief that:

-Dark skin/complexion= more masculine, strong, healthy
-Light skin/complexion= more feminine, light, weaker, delicate, etc.



So....I'm not surprised the darker men gravitate to the lighter women. I'm also not surprised that lighter men don't mind darker women. In fact, I'd venture to say that it is probably EASIER for a darker-skinned girl to attract a light-skinned guy than it is for a dark-skinned girl to attract a dark skinned guy. I think the darker guys are usually only seeing the light-skinned girls.

That has been my experience/observation anyway...

OT (but your post totally made me think this): Do you think the same thing could be said about heavy women and thin men? Usually you see the same phenomenon in ads (man is larger than the woman). I wonder if the media is trying to say what they perceive “femininity” to be all about (and I’m not saying I think any of these things, so no tomatoes!)

 

[MizAvalon]

I'll never forget when a dude said I didn't sound dark on the phone. I was like what the hell... his explanation is that my voice was soft. The things people say.

Ok, I have really heard it all now. Of course we've all heard the "sounding white or sounding black" thing, but now people are guessing skin TONES based on voices?

That is SICK.

 

[MizAvalon]

Honestly, I think it's incredibly easy. I am "chocolate"(I think that term is ridiculous) and "chocolate" men approach me all the time. Doesn't matter where I happen to be in the country or even if I'm in another country. If anything, I think they may feel safer approaching me because I look like them and they may feel that they have less of a chance of being turned down.

You wanna know how easy it is for a "chocolate" woman to get a "chocolate" man? Look at the millions of "chocolate" CHILDREN running around and that should answer the question.

Ladies, please stop falling for this. Black men are attracted to black women and date and marry them more than any other women.

 

[cocoberry10]

I'll never forget when a dude said I didn't sound dark on the phone. I was like what the hell... his explanation is that my voice was soft. The things people say.

Now, that’s just crazy!

 

[cocoberry10]

Honestly, I think it's incredibly easy. I am "chocolate"(I think that term is ridiculous) and "chocolate" men approach me all the time. Doesn't matter where I happen to be in the country or even if I'm in another country. If anything, I think they may feel safer approaching me because I look like them and they may feel that they have less of a chance of being turned down.

You wanna know how easy it is for a "chocolate" woman to get a "chocolate" man? Look at the millions of "chocolate" CHILDREN running around and that should answer the question.

Ladies, please stop falling for this. Black men are attracted to black women and date and marry them more than any other women.

I agree with this!

 

[Iansan]

Why are we constantly focusing on who rappers use in their videos. As we've seen the women they have at home don't even look like half of these girls. I guarantee you chocolate guys talk to chocolate girls. If they don't where you're at, I suggest relocating to Brooklyn.

ITA. Everyone who fears that black men don't marry black women, all black men are with white or "other" women, black people are endanger of becoming extinct should move to BK, lol....

 

[cocoberry10]

ITA. Everyone who fears that black men don't marry black women, all black men are with white or "other" women, black people are endanger of becoming extinct should move to BK, lol....

Girl, I’m packing my bags (I started the thread will Blacks become extinct after the Black murder thread)

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

Girl, I’m packing my bags (I started the thread will Blacks become extinct after the Black murder thread)

Maybe I"m out of it, but what does BK stand for??

 

[MizAvalon]

Maybe I"m out of it, but what does BK stand for??

Brooklyn!

 

[glamazon386]

I find that so interesting. My brother is very light and he prefers to date girls that medium brown to dark skinned.

Yeah it had gotten to the point that my family members starting making coments. They were like why do you keep bringing home these light brights? They're starting to look alike. erplexed But for whatever reason that was what I attracted. My preference is Chocolate.

 

[Country gal]

Chocolate gurl checking in. In my area, you see lots of interracial couples. Lots of them. When I see young black couples, it really stands out. Growing up dark skin was never in. The guys always liked the fairer skin girls. High school and the rest of my life definitely changed for the better. I still get the chocolate, or pretty for a black girl comments. I talk to guys a lot and listen for certain things. If I sense you have hang ups or colorism issues than I am ghost. Most of the guys I have dated have been lighter than me. I almost married a very fair skin man but wisen up quick.

Being nice looking or hot is definitely a plus.

 

[glamazon386]

i think it depends on where you are. in Miami i gonna have to say most of the video girls are Spanish. i asked my male cousin who's from Canada why he dates white women, he told me that's what he grew up around. I'm sure if i had lived where he was from my tastes would be different. People who hate sisters are being ignorant and they got issues that we shouldn't be concerned with. But i think the majority of men like beautiful women. Go to a mainly 'white' club and those boys in there will hit on you same as in the 'black' club.

I think this comes into play after a man's preference (if he has one) does. It's like if you're exceptionally beautiful, then it doesn't matter. I get a lot of the "I've never dated a dark skinned woman before I met you but when I saw you I just HAD to find out who you were" comments.

 

[cocoberry10]

I think this comes into play after a man's preference (if he has one) does. It's like if you're exceptionally beautiful, then it doesn't matter. I get a lot of the "I've never dated a dark skinned woman before I met you but when I saw you I just HAD to find out who you were" comments.

Ha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[adf23]

I'll never forget when a dude said I didn't sound dark on the phone. I was like what the hell... his explanation is that my voice was soft. The things people say.

That is one of the most ridiculous things I have ever heard. He deserved to be hung up on.

 

[Stormy]

Well I'm a chocolate sister and it's been very easy for me. The city or country didn't matter. Never knew this was a problem.

 

[cocoberry10]

Bumping!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Reslnt1]

i rarely dated light skin men until i came to the DC area.....all of my men have been very dark skin for the most part and every

 

[KiSseS03]

I had no idea that this was a problem! I get approached by light and dark skin brothas, and I'm an equal opportunity employer!

 

[facets]

I'm still abt 'sounding dark'... have mercy,..that's truly..errum special.

 

[Dposh167]

I do agree that darker skinned women aren't represented too much which does create an altered image of how beautiful they truly are. Even tho i'm light-skinned, I take great offense to it myself!

but honestly, it does depend on where u live. I went to school in philadelphia and those brothas looove their black women. I rarely saw a lot of interracial couples my whole 4 years down there. But back home in ny is a different case. and i'm sure if i went to miami or california it would be a different scenario as well.

But I generally believe that black men still like us. They can have their fantasies about spanish or mixed girls based on rap videos, but i still hit up the black clubs and those black men are in there whispering in the ears of all different looking sistas. dark and light...so i think they're still interested.

 

[cocoberry10]

I do agree that darker skinned women aren't represented too much which does create an altered image of how beautiful they truly are. Even tho i'm light-skinned, I take great offense to it myself!

but honestly, it does depend on where u live. I went to school in philadelphia and those brothas looove their black women. I rarely saw a lot of interracial couples my whole 4 years down there. But back home in ny is a different case. and i'm sure if i went to miami or california it would be a different scenario as well.

But I generally believe that black men still like us. They can have their fantasies about spanish or mixed girls based on rap videos, but i still hit up the black clubs and those black men are in there whispering in the ears of all different looking sistas. dark and light...so i think they're still interested.

I agree with everything you said!

 

[Imani]

I am dark brown and I get approached by dark and light skinned guys. I would probably say it is slightly more light skinned guys though similar to what Glamazon pointed out. I've met several light skinned guys who say they love dark girls.

Dudes just say stupid stuff, like this one dark skinned guy told me he doesn't holler at light skinned girls bc they have attitude problemsnono:. Or i've heard other dudes say they holler at dark skinned girls bc its "easier" and they figure they'd get turned down by the light skinnedgirlserplexed. Foolishness. I think most of these dudes have some self esteem issues.

I've never gotten the "pretty for a dark skinned girl" comments before. I've had several guys comment on that I looked cute for someone w/short hair and that they normally prefer long hair but think my hair looks nice on me.

But everyone is entitled to their preferences, just don't be disrespectful about it (like calling people muts). I'm not ashamed to say that I am generally more attracted to very dark skinned men. Perhaps its bc all the men in my family are very dark. Thats not to say I won't talk to a lighter toned dude, the darker guys are just the ones who will catch my eye first.

 

[Theo]

I'm dark-skinned... I do get more play from light-skinned guys than chocolate guys... though I've definitely gotten play from them as well.

I remember one day, I was sitting in the cafe with a bunch of male friends of mine and they were actually rating different females (i know... very immature) but one of them said that it was "easier" for light-skinned girls to be cute than it is for dark-skinned girls. It was an interesting thought.