How do you usually get asked out by quality men?

[LiftedUp]

The last time a "quality man" asked me out, I was sitting in KFC on campus having a quick meal and he sat at my table and he started a conversation.

Now to me he was a "quality man" because of our similar upbringing and well he was a med student lol.

We remain good friends though

 

[Syrah]

How do you do the bolded?

What else makes a woman approachable?

Agree with Shiloh. Eye contact and smiling. Turn off the iPod. Don't be so quick to jump on the iPhone. I don't feel the need to seem "busy" - you know what I'm talking about - people who have to be on the phone when they're on the train, in the take-out line or waiting for the bus.

I think approachability is universal - Men aside, I've found that even when I'm in a foreign country where I don't look like the natives (i.e. Southeast Asia or Australia), people tend to stop me and ask for directions.

 

[Imani]

Also, where you live matters. Some cities and towns are just miserable and depressed...if you've been looking around and the men-folk are truly lacking you might want to head to your nearest city to hang out. There are usually more options and with a bigger selection of men to choose from there is a better chance of attracting a quality type of man.

This describes my town to a tee. I don't even attempt to go out here, would be a lost cause. I drive 100 miles to Atlanta whenever I want to do anything.

Sent from my T-Mobile myTouch 3G using Long Hair Care Forum App

 

[~~HoneyComb~~]

IMO, one never knows a quality man until "after" they have dated. But I get what you are saying, OP.

Exactly

You'd have to get to "know" the man first to know if he's quality anything. Just because a man's appearance or his education seems "quality" doesn't necessarily mean the man is.

 

[nathansgirl1908]

Really?

Lol. Hilarious.

 

[Ladybelle]

Exactly

You'd have to get to "know" the man first to know if he's quality anything. Just because a man's appearance or his education seems "quality" doesn't necessarily mean the man is.

Amen to that! There all types of sheep out there in wolf's clothing, they talk nice, look nice, smell nice, are educated, make good money but are different men behind closed doors once they have captured a "quality" woman. erplexed

 

[lushcoils]

Exactly

You'd have to get to "know" the man first to know if he's quality anything. Just because a man's appearance or his education seems "quality" doesn't necessarily mean the man is.

Of course.

This thread is more about after you have gotten to know the men, and find out if they are quality or not...do you notice a trend of the way quality men ask you out vs non-quality men?

 

[~~HoneyComb~~]

Of course.

This thread is more about after you have gotten to know the men, and find out if they are quality or not...do you notice a trend of the way quality men ask you out vs non-quality men?

That makes more sense

I couldn't understand how you would know just by a man approaching you that he was a quality man

 

[LiftedUp]

Quality is subjective. It's what ever you deem as being quality.

 

[Qualitee]

Lets be real, you can have all the best qualities in the world and every type of man will try to talk to you. I think is pretty obvious by now that having a good education, pretty face, decent family, good morals, a great career, a nice body etc isn't getting or keeping you a man. All because a man is a lawyer, drives a nice car, lives in a nice house, dresses well,takes care of his loved one, gives to the poor etc doesn't mean he is going to marry you let alone treat you right.

Anyway, there are "quality" men out there and I really hate when woman say that you have to go to certain places to find them. That's farthest from the truth. I know someone who found a "quality" man on line at the post office and they are happily married now. If going to certain places and doing certain things makes it more likey for you to find your type of "quality" man, how come you are still single?

 

[Makenzie]

Agree with Shiloh. Eye contact and smiling. Turn off the iPod. Don't be so quick to jump on the iPhone. I don't feel the need to seem "busy" - you know what I'm talking about - people who have to be on the phone when they're on the train, in the take-out line or waiting for the bus.

I think approachability is universal - Men aside, I've found that even when I'm in a foreign country where I don't look like the natives (i.e. Southeast Asia or Australia), people tend to stop me and ask for directions.

Great tip. I have that bad.

 

[RegaLady]

Lets be real, you can have all the best qualities in the world and every type of man will try to talk to you. I think is pretty obvious by now that having a good education, pretty face, decent family, good morals, a great career, a nice body etc isn't getting or keeping you a man. All because a man is a lawyer, drives a nice car, lives in a nice house, dresses well,takes care of his loved one, gives to the poor etc doesn't mean he is going to marry you let alone treat you right.

Anyway, there are "quality" men out there and I really hate when woman say that you have to go to certain places to find them. That's farthest from the truth. I know someone who find a "quality" man on line at the post office and they are happily married now. If going to certain places and doing certain things makes it more likey for you to find your type of "quality" man, how come you are still single?

ITA! With your whole post but this in particular. I find these dating threads really interesting. I really do. I know many want to increase chances of finding love and one should, however, good men are everywhere. Maybe the definition of "quality", isn't clear? I don't know, but I am having a hard time understanding "quality". Is "quality"men by meaning he treats you right regardless of what he makes, and his education, or "quality" in the sense of a "high caliber" successful on paper type of man? Because there are good men everywhere I think. They are not only at wine tasting events or in law firms. They can be at grocery stores and at Borders bookstore.

 

[Syrah]

Lets be real, you can have all the best qualities in the world and every type of man will try to talk to you. I think is pretty obvious by now that having a good education, pretty face, decent family, good morals, a great career, a nice body etc isn't getting or keeping you a man. All because a man is a lawyer, drives a nice car, lives in a nice house, dresses well,takes care of his loved one, gives to the poor etc doesn't mean he is going to marry you let alone treat you right.

Anyway, there are "quality" men out there and I really hate when woman say that you have to go to certain places to find them. That's farthest from the truth. I know someone who found a "quality" man on line at the post office and they are happily married now. If going to certain places and doing certain things makes it more likey for you to find your type of "quality" man, how come you are still single?

I think that is OP's question is - Where are the folks who are meeting and dating 'quality' men (however you define it) meeting these men? And if you read through the posts - it sounds like everyone is saying exactly what you did - that it is random. That it's not out at the jazz bar or some professional function but in the airport, at the grocery store, in line at the post office etc.

However, I disagree that proximity is not of importance. I am not going to meet said dude at the post office on the corner of Crenshaw and Slauson. It's just not happ'nin.

 

[lushcoils]

I'm not sure why the word quality is causing problems. lol
I just put the emphasis on quality because I notice that many women talk about how they attract many men, and then a few posts/hours later, they mention how these men are broke, old, thugs, disrespectful, unattractive, etc etc. So I didn't want this thread to be about those kind of men.

I feel like most of us here have a similar definition of quality... attractive, appropriate age group, nice career, hardworking, respectful, loyal, smart (however you define smart), fun, friendly, caring, loving, clean/classy, open, relationship/married minded (if we want to get married), etc etc.

This thread is not about where you go to find quality men in particular; it's more about what approach quality men use to ask out women they are interested in seriously dating. In your experience, is there a trend?

Anyway, there are "quality" men out there and I really hate when woman say that you have to go to certain places to find them. That's farthest from the truth. I know someone who found a "quality" man on line at the post office and they are happily married now.

Not all of us are good at getting men to approach us randomly in these non-social places, so we may want to go to places that generally have a higher concentration of decent men to decrease our chances. Sure, I could meet my husband at a post office, but if I only get randomly approached like once a year maybe, then I'm not going to depend on that happening.

If going to certain places and doing certain things makes it more likey for you to find your type of "quality" man, how come you are still single?

There are many reasons. Maybe the quality men there weren't single. Maybe they weren't attracted to you. Maybe you didn't find them physically attractive. Maybe you guys didn't even get to meet and talk to each other. Maybe they were afraid to ask you out. Maybe these men aren't even looking right now. Maybe you guys dated for awhile, and broke up because it just was not going to work. Doing certain things and going certain places might increase your chances, but it's not a 100% guarantee like anything else in life. But if a lady is the type of women like I described above, I feel like it would be better for her to create her chances rather then wait and pray to God that one day a man will finally ask her out at the supermarket or gas station.

 

[beans08]

Lets be real, you can have all the best qualities in the world and every type of man will try to talk to you. I think is pretty obvious by now that having a good education, pretty face, decent family, good morals, a great career, a nice body etc isn't getting or keeping you a man. All because a man is a lawyer, drives a nice car, lives in a nice house, dresses well,takes care of his loved one, gives to the poor etc doesn't mean he is going to marry you let alone treat you right.

Anyway, there are "quality" men out there and I really hate when woman say that you have to go to certain places to find them. That's farthest from the truth. I know someone who found a "quality" man on line at the post office and they are happily married now. If going to certain places and doing certain things makes it more likey for you to find your type of "quality" man, how come you are still single?

Thanks for serving realness in this thread!