Has a man told you they prefer natural hair?

[Determined22]

I've had several men tell me that they preferred natural hair, and that they loved my twa.

 

[bluediamond0829]

The guy im seeing now perfers no weaves, no wigs, no color contacts.....last night i was tellin him i was thinkin about getting a weave and he was like alright then i'll see you in about a month then until u take it out...

I dont think it should matter what we perfer for our hair..its all about the growth and takin care of our heads. But i do perfer my natural hair over weaves at times, but it gets annoyin with being natural trying to figure out styles to do to my hair, and now since its getting thicker and a little longer it takes more time to do then before. That was the only reason why i was considering a weave was for convenience and i wanted something different.

I havent really gotten any comments about my natural hair, because usually i wear it flexi rodded and pushed back by a head band. or either i wear it pressed. I think once i get a little more length to it then i may start getting more comments.

 

[prisytomboy]

I've never had a man to tell me that. If he saw my natural hair he'd think twice tho

My SO doesn't like weave, wigs, etc. his only REQUEST is that I DON'T cut my hair. I tell ya, between he and my g-ma

If I were with a man with this preference I think we would have problems. I don't particularly want natural hair and that's just my personal choice.

 

[onyxmin]

ah! My brothers (5 of them) do not like weaves/ wigs AT ALL!!!

As for my SO, lol he says he prefers my sexy length relaxed hair. But he isn't against me going natural, wearing weaves or wigs so long long as I assure him that once I reach my goal (BSL), I will lay my wigs to rest lol

 

[newbiemom]

My dh. I am putting a weave in for a ps for the winter and I am nervous about his reaction. I know it's my hair but I want my dh approval even if I don't need it. ANd he is not gonna co-sign a weave. I went natural then fell off and texlaxed htough you can't tell but he is really into me leaving my hair in it's natural state. Int the 10 yrs we have been together I have gotten so much love for my hair from him now that it is natural.

 

[Kerryann]

When guys say nautral hair they mean no weaves. I know a lot of guys that cant stand the weave. My recent ex hate weaves so i never wear them and he so so so hate wigs

 

[BlkRushhin]

The FedEx man told me yesterday at my job. It was funny cus he blushed :blush3: like a little boy as he said how much he "really liked my 'fro".

 

[Southernbella.]

I was at a party and my hair was straightened and starting to get frizzy (my cousin said it wasn't but I'm more critical of my hair). This guy came up to my table and was talking then said he was happy to see a woman wearing their natural hair and not all the weaves and fake hair. I didn't know what to say so I just said "thank you" and smiled. I know alot of black men prefer long hair and don't like fake hair but how often do strangers tell you they like that you don't wear a weave?

I haven't had a man say they prefer natural hair. The comments I've gotten are:

"Wow, I love when a woman wears her hair like that!"
"Wow, I like your hair. You don't see too many women with their hair like that."
"That looks good on you, ma!"
"I like that look!"
"It looks so soft. I just want to touch it!"
My dh's boss said, "I love that you wear you hair natural! These women these days...I just don't know."

They seem more in awe and surprised to see natural hair than anything else. I think they'd have to have more exposure to natural hair to develop a preference. That may happen in places like NYC, it's not happening where I live (yet).

ETA: Oh, I see we're talking about weave vs. real hair. Yeah, I don't know any man, any where, ever in life who doesn't prefer real hair to fake hair.

 

[ChristmasCarol]

"Natural hair" to the men I know just means "your own hair". They don't have a clue about relaxed, texlaxed, etc.

My DH and my 2 brothers do NOT like weaves/wigs that are longer than your own hair. My bff wears short wigs occasionally cuz she doesn't want to cut her hair and they think it's OK because she has long hair. I've been so low-maintenance - no nails, weaves, hair color, colored contacts, excessive makeup, etc. that I think they are somewhat confused about what most women like to do for themselves. He calls me his "feminine tomboy". It's a compliment, but he forgets that many women are young and/or single and don't want to wear a single french braid or a bun everyday. Being "plain" is not for everyone.

I don't like the way that he and my brothers make fun of women who use these items, however. They can be really mean. They link weaves/wigs/primary colored hair, especially lacefronts (why did seaborn do it?) to a "ghetto mentality" and believe it is extremely low-class and prevents many sisters from finding a good husband.

The reason it bothers me is because they don't say nearly as much about how men look...but I guess that's the way it is. But, in their defense, they aren't hypocrites - they haven't dated or married any women who use these items.

 

[Lei*Lei]

My bil loves natural hair. He is forever trying to get his gf to go natural.

 

[saved06]

This is funny, just last week this guy stopped me in the parking lot just to tell me "I really like your hair. You know why? Because it's yours. Why don't black women just wear their own hair?"

But when you ask a man who is fine and who they would like to date they mention women with weaves. So I don't know. (I love being natural by the way)

 

[Beaute Noire]

My BF does not like weaves at all, nor does my brother. But they wouldn't care if I was natural or relaxed as long as its mine

But...my BF is attracted (but not limited) to certain *Video Girl* types and I'm like "Babe, they all wear weaves/lace fronts, you know that right???!!!".

 

[DMJ's Mom]

DH has said (when we first started talking) that he appreciates that I don't wear weave and chemicals but I think he'd be perfectly ok with it if I were to relax my hair at any time. Also a friend of the family has named his daughter's puff "The ButterCaramel" . The guys that I work with love when I wear my hair in an afro or puff it gets talked about for days compared to when I straighten my hair. The majority of people that I know have told me that natural hair "suits me" (How it can't when its what God gave me is beyond me)

 

[happylife]

sometimes but I mostly get "is your hair naturally curly ?" quite a bit from men and women.

 

[LoveLongLocks]

My SO, and others have told me that my natural hair is refreshing to see. I think that it is also nice to see natural hair- but, I love a good weave also ...

 

[prisytomboy]

My BF does not like weaves at all, nor does my brother. But they wouldn't care if I was natural or relaxed as long as its mine

But...my BF is attracted (but not limited) to certain *Video Girl* types and I'm like "Babe, they all wear weaves/lace fronts, you know that right???!!!".

Girl he looking at that a$$ move....he ain't studdin' no hair!!!!! She could be meat head bald with a paper bag on her head....SHE'S STILL GOING TO LOOK GOOD TO HIM....MY FAULT....THEM!!!!

 

[anon123]

Hmm, explicitly told me they prefer natural hair? Not just that they like my natural hair? Hmm, an occasional older man will tell me this while trying to flirt. An older white guy I used to be around told me this on more than one occasion.

 

[Desarae]

Yes, my SO. He prefers my natural hair on me and he is adamant that out DD stay natural (she will)

 

[MonPetite]

My father. Does that count? ^_^

 

[Soliel185]

I've been getting it as I venture out more with the fro. With some men it's a more thoughtful response, like maybe they never really considered what it would look like in real life. With others it's more of an animalistic sticky-fingered child thing where they appear next to me suddenly with restless fingers and wide eyes.

I was out after the club standing outside a pizza place with a friend and this TALL African man came up very close on my right side and then he bent down and said " I have to compliment you very quietly. I love the Afrocentric look." and then he just walked away.

I was like 'wait...people directly FROM Africa use the term "afro-centric"!?!?!?!"


I think men like the look of A LOT of hair, and they like knowing that it's real. It's some kind of genetic pheromone thing, I think.

 

[KrystalClear]

Yes, I get more compliments than I EVER did when I was relaxed. I get them from women too, especially white women! I can't WAIT until I'm BSL or longer NATURAL. =)

 

[thenimblelife22]

I've been getting it as I venture out more with the fro. With some men it's a more thoughtful response, like maybe they never really considered what it would look like in real life. With others it's more of an animalistic sticky-fingered child thing where they appear next to me suddenly with restless fingers and wide eyes.

I think men like the look of A LOT of hair, and they like knowing that it's real. It's some kind of genetic pheromone thing, I think.

You hit it dead on the head with the "animalistic" thing. It's so random, but dudes, black and especially white, always wanna put their hands in my 'fro! I think the look of mass curls piled all over my head is sexy to them just because it's wild-looking and maybe reminds them of bedhead? I don't think natural as in no relaxer is necessarily a preference for most black men unless they're on the militant side, at least in my experience. I have a white male coworker, however, who's wife is black and apparently straightens her hair (I don't know if she's relaxed or not) and he always talks to me about my hair, saying he wish his wife would wear it the way I do. So I don't know.

My BF loves my 'fro tho, he's always tugging at it in the car, at the grocery store, at the mall, everywhere, lol. I know he prefers my hair natural on me, but in general he just likes women with real hair, as do most men.

 

[Arcadian]

Natural as in my own hair as opposed to a wig?

Well of course! The longer it gets the more SO wants to play with it (especially 10 weeks post relaxer)

He would prefer that not relax, and I've told him that its not about him.

Its rare for me to wear my hair down. I don't know what it is with hair people in general but I do get a lot of male (and female) attention when I do.

-A

 

[purplepeace79]

I do think where you live plays a role. In larger cities like NYC (where I live), natural sistas are everywhere. And certain folks tend to flock together. So the parties or concerts I go to, at least 80% of the women are natural. Thats where I encounter men the most, and they love it.

Now, I was just in a suburb of ATL for a few days and walking around in the malls and such, I got some looks... and they weren't exactly complimentary. It was weird. I felt... weird. For the first time since being natural.

My friend and I were thinking about getting weaves for the winter. But my boo was like "Naw, tell her I aint having that" lol It felt good to have my man show appreciation. My ex-h would have died if I relaxed. Even when I got it straightened few weeks ago, he was like "What did you do?? I dont like it" lol

 

[BostonMaria]

My DH prefers my natural hair only because my hair is longer now than it was when I first met him. He can see the difference between my flat, lifeless SL relaxed hair (no offense to the relaxed heads, this is how my hair was) and the MBL thicker hair I have now. I do admit he gives me more attention when its straight, but whatever I gotta pick my battles. I prefer my hair curly over straight, but I change it around to keep him interested.

 

[song_of_serenity]

Yes, my ex and my bestfriend, both whom are both white and one naturally curly himself and Australian. :/ Never heard it from a non extremely afrocentric "perms are the devil" type man before....
...
The level of respect and approach changes since I've had my natural hair with "regular" guys...

 

[Jenn22588]

My DH prefers my natural hair only because my hair is longer now than it was when I first met him. He can see the difference between my flat, lifeless SL relaxed hair (no offense to the relaxed heads, this is how my hair was) and the MBL thicker hair I have now. I do admit he gives me more attention when its straight, but whatever I gotta pick my battles. I prefer my hair curly over straight, but I change it around to keep him interested.

My ex did too. We rarely talked about hair other than the fact that he didn't like wigs. It was starting to get cold so I was gonna go wig shopping and he said he didn't like them, he hated that his sisters and mom wore them. When I wore my hair straight he couldn't keep his hands outta my head but when it was curly/kinky, he didn't even touch it. I never asked him about it though.

 

[CurlyMoo]

I'm usually just told that they like my hair not that they are glad that it's natural. I enjoy most hair compliments.

 

[loveable37]

I am amost 3 months post relaxer ,i tried to wear a braid out for aleast 2 weeks my husband sad said"< u must need a perm so i told him>> no this a braidout he shake his head like its ugly no more braid out for me.imma strenght my perm out long as i can 6 months here i come well na x-mas comin up i might relax then my youngest son born on x-mas he be 19 yrs old .

 

[YankeeCandle]

One time I decided to wear my fro out fully shrunken and unmanipuated I looked like this I was walking down the street in brooklyn in my old neighborhood.

If that's you in that pic, do you think that fellow's admiration might also have had something to do with your bangin' hot pink minidress and Tina Turner legs??

With others it's more of an animalistic sticky-fingered child thing where they appear next to me suddenly with restless fingers and wide eyes.

Amazing line and observation. And so true. I grew up totally ignored by European-ancestry men, but when they get liquored up enough at dance clubs to lose their "long straight hair and skinny body = only acceptable form of beauty" programming, they occasionally come up to me and compliment my hair. I also recently had a (Native-American-ancestry not African-ancestry) Hispanic stop dancing with my Asian Indian friend (she of the satin-like, mirror-shiny straight hair) to come over to me and deliver an ode to my hair (which was in an especially large and dry and frizzy Scary Spice mane). I had to dance away from him not only because I have an SO, but because he was creeping me out with the crazy fire in his eyes as he talked about my hair!


As for me:

SO always jokes me when I do my twice yearly press. He says straight hair looks "like a rat." Whenever he comes over and sees I haven't yet washed out that press, he calls me his little rat. But, it might have to do with both general cultural background and individual family background. We are both from immigrant backgrounds, but I think in his case, he was just used to a mother with a small, trimmed and shaped natural 'fro, and he spent much more time with his mother and sisters growing up than with other men. So, he never really grew up surrounded by weaved or relaxed role models and such.

Back when he was teen, too, there was less saturation of Western media and there was no such thing as a music video!

But it is so true what others here have said about men--no matter their ancestry--misunderstanding the word "natural."

I agree with those who expressed concern about both the weave-pushers and the natural-pushers. I am very wary of anyone (man or woman) in life whose "preferences' stem less from what they merely enjoy than from what they are adamently, obessively and pointedly against.