"Why do so many blacks prefer straight hair?"

[BeetleBug]

Is it ok to lmao at Nichi?

Yeah, I checked her siggy. lol

 

[tHENATuRALhAiRpRoJEcT]

what she said

 

[BelindaLuz]

Personally, I prefer to wear straight or loose curl styles because it looks best on me based on my physical attributes such as face shape, height, neck, etc. For instance, a straight look slims my round face visually. Any bulk makes me look like a tankhead. Um...no. That's my brother.

Wish I had a deep answer that would properly represent blacks that prefer straight hair rolleyes but, *shrugs* I guess my answer is personal preference.

Not startin mess, just asking a question.

Your statement is based on whos standards?

A white stylest or a non white stylest that was trained by a white person in a school geered toward white people or cosmatology/stylest books writen by white people that tells all of the student that "highly ethnic/kinky hair can only be managed by relaxing the hair".

I had those books because my mom went to cosmatology school for a while.

Again, not an attack. Many of us do not know why we think, feel, believe a certin way until we do a little (or a lot of) research.

Great topic.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

But we don't see relaxed ladies pushing relaxers on this site. This site is about welcoming the beauty of both relaxed and natural hair, not the elevated divisive good & bad hair mentality. This site is supposed to an oasis from that. This is supposed to be celebrating and helping others to achieve long hair, both relaxed and natural. I wish we would get back to discussing that instead of things that can divide us.

Honestly, I've been hearing about these kind of women for a long time ... but I've never actually seen one (lol) Like Bigfoot. That's why I liked LHCF in the first place. I thought it was a place without the division.... but it seems we're just hell bent on changing that. *sigh*

 

[Bubblingbrownshuga]

When you can show us where your people were stolen from their land, brought over here to work for free for 4 centuries, raped, separated from their families, lynched for no reason, told you were ugly, had your hair called "dreadful", made to change your religion, not keep your own name, not speak your own language, not allowed to learn to read, not allowed to marry, were made to cover your head after you had been freed because your oppressors said your hair is offensive (research Ante-Bellum law), etc...

AND, after you built this country on your back

you weren't allowed to vote, go to school where you want, live where you want, eat where you want, have limited use of PUBLIC transportation, still getting lynched for no reason, churches burned, dogs turned against you. waterhoses put on your children, etc..

which ends up facilitating an atmosphere where

no matter how smart you are, how educated you are, how talented you are, etc..

you are still expected to jump through hurdles to get to the same place that the children of the oppressors (who may or may not be as capable as you) can casually walk to...

AND

the country that your ancestors built on their backs, gave most of their ingenuity to in the form of both primitive and modern inventions (like the cell phone) to make both your life and the life of your oppressors easier...

THEN

tells you that you aren't even important enough to have your TRUE story put into the history books for generations to come to know the truth about who you are, tells you through television and print that you are an insignificant part of the collective like a shrub or a bush,

THEN

talk to us about how friendly of a white person you and your friends are.

Do not talk about Black experience, because you are not Black. I don't care if you have 56z hair. You are not Black, have never been Black, will never be Black, and you have benefited in one way or another from the systemic racism of this country.

I could go on but I'm sure you get the message:

Don't make yourself a mascot.

Every time...every single time, they come into targeted sites and start with the race-baiting and I'm sick of it.

We were having a conversation basically about slave psychology in relation to OUR hair and here comes the troll bringing up something TOTALLY IRRELEVANT to the conversation.

What kills me more, is that you have people here giving her props for the completely baseless $hit she's spouting.

Here's what's better (and proves she's a mascot): she came in here spouting that same Kum Bah Yah/ I'm not like that/ I have Black friends stuff that they all spout when they hear the truth and feel indicted. Her whiteness shows because she feels that since she didn't do it and allegedly doesn't know anyone else who is her definition of "racist" that we coloreds must be delusional and overly-sensitive.

So her experience is the only one that is valid and that counts for something.

To the brown people on the board: sound familiar?

Bad news for you East Cleveland, racism is not just people not liking you because of race. Go back to the beginning of this post and re-read if you're still confused. Your friends have already told off on you. Start reading... start with Tim Wise, Molly Secours, and then keep going.

I'll leave you with some Robert Jensen, a white guy, who authored a book entitled "The Heart of Whiteness". It goes like this:

"It may seem self-indulgent to talk about the fears of white people in a white-supremacist society. After all, what do white people really have to be afraid of in a world structured on white privilege? It may be self-indulgent, but it's critical to understand because these fears are part of what keeps many white people from confronting ourselves and the system.

The first, and perhaps most crucial, fear is that of facing the fact that some of what we white people have is unearned. It's a truism that we don't really make it on our own; we all have plenty of help to achieve whatever we achieve. That means that some of what we have is the product of the work of others, distributed unevenly across society, over which we may have little or no control individually. No matter how hard we work or how smart we are, we all know -- when we are honest with ourselves -- that we did not get where we are by merit alone. And many white people are afraid of that fact.

A second fear is crasser: White people's fear of losing what we have -- literally the fear of losing things we own if at some point the economic, political, and social systems in which we live become more just and equitable. That fear is not completely irrational; if white privilege -- along with the other kinds of privilege many of us have living in the middle class and above in an imperialist country that dominates much of the rest of the world -- were to evaporate, the distribution of resources in the United States and in the world would change, and that would be a good thing. We would have less. That redistribution of wealth would be fairer and more just. But in a world in which people have become used to affluence and material comfort, that possibility can be scary.

A third fear involves a slightly different scenario -- a world in which non-white people might someday gain the kind of power over whites that whites have long monopolized. One hears this constantly in the conversation about immigration, the lingering fear that somehow "they" (meaning not just Mexican-Americans and Latinos more generally, but any non-white immigrants) are going to keep moving to this country and at some point become the majority demographically. Even though whites likely can maintain a disproportionate share of wealth, those numbers will eventually translate into political, economic, and cultural power. And then what? Many whites fear that the result won't be a system that is more just, but a system in which white people become the minority and could be treated as whites have long treated non-whites. This is perhaps the deepest fear that lives in the heart of whiteness. It is not really a fear of non-white people. It's a fear of the depravity that lives in our own hearts: Are non-white people capable of doing to us the barbaric things we have done to them?


A final fear has probably always haunted white people but has become more powerful since the society has formally rejected overt racism: The fear of being seen, and seen-through, by non-white people. Virtually every white person I know, including white people fighting for racial justice and including myself, carries some level of racism in our minds and hearts and bodies. In our heads, we can pretend to eliminate it, but most of us know it is there. And because we are all supposed to be appropriately anti-racist, we carry that lingering racism with a new kind of fear: What if non-white people look at us and can see it? What if they can see through us? What if they can look past our anti-racist vocabulary and sense that we still don't really know how to treat them as equals? What if they know about us what we don't dare know about ourselves? What if they can see what we can't even voice?

I work in a large university with a stated commitment to racial justice. All of my faculty colleagues, even the most reactionary, have a stated commitment to racial justice. And yet the fear is palpable.

It is a fear I have struggled with, and I remember the first time I ever articulated that fear in public. I was on a panel with several other professors at the University of Texas discussing race and politics in the O.J. Simpson case. Next to me was an African American professor. I was talking about media; he was talking about the culture's treatment of the sexuality of black men. As we talked, I paid attention to what was happening in me as I sat next to him. I felt uneasy. I had no reason to be uncomfortable around him, but I wasn't completely comfortable. During the question-and-answer period -- I don't remember what question sparked my comment -- I turned to him and said something like, "It's important to talk about what really goes on between black and white people in this country. For instance, why am I feeling afraid of you? I know I have no reason to be afraid, but I am. Why is that?"

My reaction wasn't a crude physical fear, not some remnant of being taught that black men are dangerous (though I have had such reactions to black men on the street in certain circumstances). Instead, I think it was that fear of being seen through by non-white people, especially when we are talking about race. In that particular moment, for a white academic on an O.J. panel, my fear was of being exposed as a fraud or some kind of closet racist. Even if I thought I knew what I was talking about and was being appropriately anti-racist in my analysis, I was afraid that some lingering trace of racism would show through, and that my black colleague would identify it for all in the room to see. After I publicly recognized the fear, I think I started to let go of some of it. Like anything, it's a struggle. I can see ways in which I have made progress. I can see that in many situations I speak more freely and honestly as I let go of the fear. I make mistakes, but as I become less terrified of making mistakes I find that I can trust my instincts more and be more open to critique when my instincts are wrong. "

I'm done with this one.

BEST
FRIGGIN
POST
EVER!!!!!

 

[BelindaLuz]

I agree...she aint slick!!! Curly hair is a dominant trait, yt women fry their hair daily with a flat iron to mask the curl and suffer excessive heat damage, breakage and split ends.

I think its human nature to want what you dont have but yt's have consistently made a point of making us feel inadeqate over our God given features and attributes.....hair, buts, lips, etc.

The only attributes they are willing to copy are our breast and out tan (as long as it is not too dark).

 

[kmn1980]

Nichi:

Delivering straight ether through her sig since June 2010.

Social consciousness is a beautiful thing.

 

[LaFemmeNaturelle]

The only attributes they are willing to copy are our breast and out tan (as long as it is not too dark).

And the booty.....and the lips.....and the braids (or were we not the first?)

Honestly, as much as whites have put us (and other minorities) down in the past and present, I think they actually LOVE US. They just couldn't understand why THEY were different so they made us to feel inferior. They talked about africans for having big butts and looking like animals but why did the women wear those big poofy dresses that made them appear to have a big back side? So OT

Carry on....

 

[lovegymnasts]

Honestly, I've been hearing about these kind of women for a long time ... but I've never actually seen one (lol) Like Bigfoot. That's why I liked LHCF in the first place. I thought it was a place without the division.... but it seems we're just hell bent on changing that. *sigh*

I respectfully disagree. Division occurs when people take things personally and make it about themselves.
I do not see why a discussion about this topic should cause division. What is wrong with having a healthy even heated discussion about this topic in this thread and leaving it here? Maybe it is a personality thing. I can argue/disagree with someone about any subject and then let it go when it is over. I like discussions because they make me think, give me different viewpoints, and I learn something.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

I respectfully disagree. Division occurs when people take things personally and make it about themselves.
I do not see why a discussion about this topic should cause division. What is wrong with having a healthy even heated discussion about this topic in this thread and leaving it here? Maybe it is a personality thing. I can argue/disagree with someone about any subject and then let it go when it is over. I like discussions because they make me think, give me different viewpoints, and I learn something.

I completely agree with everything you just stated ... so I don't know what you're disagreeing with

 

[LadyRaider]

Researcher Ogbu said that we often act in reaction to the historical denigration of all things black. Ogbu was the one who came up with the idea of "acting white" that we have all heard of.

So Ogbu would say that if you are natural because you are rejecting the white paradigm of beauty, then you are just as caught up in the cycle as kids who insist on using African American Vernacular English and make fun of those who choose a different way.

Put simply, it can be substantiated that both "sides" of this debate are "colonized."

 

[lovegymnasts]

I completely agree with everything you just stated ... so I don't know what you're disagreeing with

I thought you were saying something to the effect that threads like these were causing this board to divide into two camps (naturals vs relaxed).

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

I thought you were saying something to the effect that threads like these were causing this board to divide into two camps (naturals vs relaxed).

Oh, no. I have no problem with threads like these. I think it's how we respond to them and take things personal, and not look at them objectively.

 

[Americka]

Researcher Ogbu said that we often act in reaction to the historical denigration of all things black. Ogbu was the one who came up with the idea of "acting white" that we have all heard of.

So Ogbu would say that if you are natural because you are rejecting the white paradigm of beauty, then you are just as caught up in the cycle as kids who insist on using African American Vernacular English and make fun of those who choose a different way.

Put simply, it can be substantiated that both "sides" of this debate are "colonized."

Yes, Yes, Yes!

Would that be John Ogbu, the Nigerian American anthropologist?

 

[softblackcotton]

i personally don't prefer straight hair. I prefer long hair and straight hair just happens to look longer than curly hair, but straight hair is so boring to me. Can't do much with it, but where it down, pony tail, up, down, YAWN! With straight hair, that's just it, it's straight, you get what you get with it. Curly/kinky hair has more character and surprises! Curly/kinky hair can shrink to shortness and then surprise people with it's straight length. Curly/kinky hair has volume so even those with thinner hair can feign thicker hair with more curls! I also prefer thickness to thinness in terms of hair. In my experience, I find that the most curly/kinky types tend to have a lot more denseness and thickness to straighter/wavy/loose curl types even when bone straighten. The 4s in my experience have the most hair on their heads and it especially shows when the hair gets long enough for the weight to straighten the kinks out a little. So my preferred hair is thick and long no matter type or texture. The end.

 

[LadyRaider]

Yes, Yes, Yes!

Would that be John Ogbu, the Nigerian American anthropologist?

Yes. He worked with American Fordham, but I am never clear which parts of their work together she disavowed.

 

[PearlyCurly]

Please


adlock2:
eace_sm:

 

[Foxglove]

Please


adlock2:
eace_sm:

It can stay open. It doesn't have to remain ugly
ETA like other people mentioned it's a good discussion but is more personal for some

 

[Bubblingbrownshuga]

You know, I see posts in here about this thread needing to be locked. Why? I mean seriously, if you want this thread locked, LHCF shouldn't be in existence. If one uses the beating a dead horse excuse for this topic, we should apply it to ALL topics because most of what's discussed here is basically recycled.

Mods, if you all decide to do something drastic with this thread, I would prefer it be locked over deleted. This topic was very informative and should serve as a hair care reference.

Peace!

 

[BelindaLuz]

White people can acheive kinky hair if they wanted, they just don't want it, right now anyway.

gone are the 60's/70's when MANY w/o kinky/coily hair wanted an AFRO

 

[DigitalRain]

WOW this thread BLEW UP! just like I knew it would

 

[HappilyLiberal]

Not startin mess, just asking a question.

Your statement is based on whos standards?

Why can't her standards be the standards she sets for herself? Why can't she embrace her desire for straight hair without having to defend her position as anything other than a personal preference.? Why are you assuming that it must have been someone white who set those standards?

 

[BelindaLuz]

i had a professor last year that said it is a "cultural norm" for blacks to be both late and loud.


but on topic: DO BLACK MEN PREFER STRAIGHT HAIR?

Norm? See it took all of me to not respond to the first post about black=loud.

Common people are loud Affluent are not and that spans all races.

I know white people who are common and loud same goes for Filipinos, Iranians, Puerto Ricans, Cubans, Dominicanas, Jamaicans, Indians, Afghanis, Italians, Germans, English, Spanish, a few Chinese two Japanese.

I also know more of the above cultures/rases who exhibit class and live an affluent lifestyle who are not loud.

That "professor" needs to go become more globally minded before letting this type of poison escape his/her being and infect others.

 

[BelindaLuz]

ITA. I call it "the why behind the why."

The following commentary I found on another site (non-hair related) and it pretty much sums up my opinion on the subject. Since the OP wants everyone to play nice, I feel that this is a safer option for me because if I say what's really on my mind...well....trust me. Here goes:

I wish I could thatnk this post 100 times...

 

[gcchick_07]

Lol, but honestly from MPOV not every AA can pull this look off without looking like an xtra from the cast of Roots. ***Dont Stone me yall***

ETA: Or maybe I shouldve used Good Times as a more modern example!

-flava flav- wooooooooooooooooooooooooooow

 

[MyAngelEyez~C~U]

ITA. I call it "the why behind the why."

The following commentary I found on another site (non-hair related) and it pretty much sums up my opinion on the subject. Since the OP wants everyone to play nice, I feel that this is a safer option for me because if I say what's really on my mind...well....trust me. Here goes:

Absolutely.

 

[PearlyCurly]

You know, I see posts in here about this thread needing to be locked. Why? I mean seriously, if you want this thread locked, LHCF shouldn't be in existence. If one uses the beating a dead horse excuse for this topic, we should apply it to ALL topics because most of what's discussed here is basically recycled.

Mods, if you all decide to do something drastic with this thread, I would prefer it be locked over deleted. This topic was very informative and should serve as a hair care reference.

Peace!

Exactly.
This topic has been discussed & repeated a thousand times on here! I have noticed that when there is a usual question like "How do you co-wash" either someone post a link to on old topic about the same thing or barely any one answers the question. But topics like this(which is still USUAL) there are like 30 freaken pages! But everyone always says the same exact thing...

1- Because they want too.
2- Because they still have a slave mentality
3- Because they hate their selves.
4- Because all the white girls have straight hair.
5- Because the relaxer is evil
6- Or someone leaves a 5pg post.

And no i am not saying what should be discussed on here since it is not my website, but 26pgs really? Keep the thread going, its nice to see the same topic discussed over & over again.
I honestly think one day, one of these "Why do black women relax their hair?" "Why do black women straighten their hair?" "Why do black women believe in good hair vs. black hair?" "Is natural hair better then relaxed hair?" Should be a sticky, so then when the question is asked then some one cant point them to the thread

 

[nikolite]

I respectfully disagree. Division occurs when people take things personally and make it about themselves.
I do not see why a discussion about this topic should cause division. What is wrong with having a healthy even heated discussion about this topic in this thread and leaving it here? Maybe it is a personality thing. I can argue/disagree with someone about any subject and then let it go when it is over. I like discussions because they make me think, give me different viewpoints, and I learn something.

ITA. I love debate, maybe that's why this is actually fun and interesting to me. I don't see any divisiveness either. Only discussion and disagreement and ain't nothing wrong with that.

 

[nikolite]

Exactly.
This topic has been discussed & repeated a thousand times on here! I have noticed that when there is a usual question like "How do you co-wash" either someone post a link to on old topic about the same thing or barely any one answers the question. But topics like this(which is still USUAL) there are like 30 freaken pages! But everyone always says the same exact thing...

1- Because they want too.
2- Because they still have a slave mentality
3- Because they hate their selves.
4- Because all the white girls have straight hair.
5- Because the relaxer is evil
6- Or someone leaves a 5pg post.

And no i am not saying what should be discussed on here since it is not my website, but 26pgs really? Keep the thread going, its nice to see the same topic discussed over & over again.
I honestly think one day, one of these "Why do black women relax their hair?" "Why do black women straighten their hair?" "Why do black women believe in good hair vs. black hair?" "Is natural hair better then relaxed hair?" Should be a sticky, so then when the question is asked then some one cant point them to the thread

Please. And your posting dead horses will help it get to 25 pages. You're contributing just like everyone else.

Clearly, people are discussing this topic and keep coming back to it for a reason. Discussion and debate is what stimulates intellectual progress. I'm sure everyone who has participated has pulled something relevant from this thread (even if its a little time away from doing the work we're supposed to be doing right now). You have no right to tell anyone what they can or cannot talk about in this forum. By your logic, how about we just shut-down the entire forum and make it a web resource for LHC junkies?

If someone is tired of these discussions or can't tolerate the opinions here, then stop responding and stop opening up and viewing the thread. Keep your cursor moving. You knew what we were talking about before you came in!

 

[jennboo]

I hate the term,nappy Nazi, but I get why some use it. It is because some naturals try to force feed their view on others and it leads to bad consequences. People have been hurt by their words or actions. It basically is a superiority complex. It seems there is a theme going on in this thread where relaxed or strait = inferior/ brain washed and natural hair is elevated. It leads to division to elevate one above another. That is my opinion of the term. I don't view natural hair as bad. It is just another way for me to wear my hair if I choose to do so as well as relaxed hair.

Not that i agree, but what are the bad consequences? Waking up and embracing your natural hair?